Knives raked against his skull from the inside out. A combination of the silent tears that had tracked down Abby's silken cheeks and the raging of the chained, caged, fully feral Alpha in his mind made his temples throb and nausea roil in his stomach.
As soon as the words had left his mouth, he'd known they had been a mistake. He wasn't worthy to be her Alpha, but telling her like that should never have happened. With their interactions over the past few weeks, he had forgotten that he couldn't keep her. He'd become lost in some dreamscape where he was just an Alpha with an Omega who called to him. He hadn't thought about how she might perceive their interactions. She would never be his. Could never be his.
Abby had stared at him for a few moments in silence, and he could pinpoint the moment when his hastily spoken words struck her heart. Her delicate chin had wobbled for a second before it lifted with a hint of the strength he knew she carried deep inside. Standing, she brushed nonexistent lint from her skirt.
"Thank -" her voice broke, but she tried to cover it by clearing her throat, "Thank you for your help these past few weeks. I'm sure your squad will be happy to have you back."
Despite her steady voice, those damnable tears rolled down her cheeks. Killian reached out to take her hand, already regretting the obvious pain his hasty words caused, but she'd stepped away from him quickly.
"No." Abby said clearly, without a hint of hesitation. "I don't consent for you to touch me. Someday, I'll give that consent to my Alpha, and you've made it clear that it won't be you."
More tears fell from her eyes, and despite the world around him filling with a red haze and roars from inside his own mind, he could see each of those salty drops like they were lit with beacons.
No! She is mine! Thoughts of Blossom in the arms of some unknown Alpha, images of her laughing at a faceless male, and flashes of her with a rounded belly and a dark-haired toddler in her arms made him want to rage. The Alpha he'd caged in his consciousness began to riot and try to destroy the bars of his mental prison.
Before he'd managed to regain control of his primal fury enough not to reach out and carry her off to his cave, all he could see was her swift retreat down the hallway leading to dining room.
Since then, he'd been pacing back and forth in front of the bay window, trying to rein in his urge to chase after Blossom, kneel at her feet, and beg for forgiveness. The rational, controlled warrior he'd always been knew that he'd made the right choice. He was too old for her. Too controlling. Too dominating. She needed to find her way in the world now that it was opened up to her. To tie her to him before she'd even had a chance to explore the outside world was criminal.
Someday she'd thank him.
The primal beast now living inside him ached and raged for his mate. He was a persistent bastard. Just when Killian thought he was regaining some self-control, the monster would throw himself at the bars over and over. Promises and threats of what he would do when he was free should have chilled Killian to his core, but one thought continued to play on repeat over and over.
She was ours, and I let her go.
Raking a hand through his hair, a shadowy movement from outside in the garden caught his attention. An instinct for battle that he'd developed over his time as a soldier sharpened his senses, and despite a feeling of utter desolation, the raging lunatic in his head became deathly silent.
Stepping to another outward-facing window a few feet away from the bay window, he stood to the side so he could see out into the shadowy garden without being seen. While he'd been fighting his internal war, dusk had fallen, and the garden was covered in darkened shadows from the walls, the building itself, and drooping trees. There were shadows everywhere, but he knew the movement that had caught his eye was out of place.
Something was wrong.
He'd no sooner finished that thought than screams erupted from the dining room where the Omegas on clean-up duty were finishing eating and tidying up from dinner.
Blossom had clean-up duty tonight.
Before he'd registered he was moving, Killian tore down the hallway Abby had disappeared down earlier. The dining hall also bordered the enclosed garden, but with the twists and turns of Sanctuary's hallways, it took way too long to get there. Needing to turn the upcoming corner, but unwilling to slow for even a moment, he reached out and punched his fingers through the drywall, Using his grip, he hurled himself around the corner without stopping. He vaguely felt blood running down his fingers, but he would lose every drop of his blood if it meant getting to Abby faster.
When he finally reached the closest entrance to the dining hall, he entered into chaos.
Several Omegas were struggling to open the double wooden doors. A silver steel link chain wrapped around the vertical handles outside the dining room. In the hallway, more Omegas were trying to help their fellow trapped Omegas. They pushed against each other frantically, and through the clear windows embedded in the doors, he could see tears in the eyes of the panicked Omegas. Firmly pushing his way through them, Killian gripped the chain, and rather than slow down and attempt to unlock or break the thick steel links, he ripped them up and then down forcefully, breaking the ornate handles from the doors themselves rather than fighting the chains themselves.
Throwing the doors wide, the Omegas who'd been trying to escape the dining room swarmed out of the opening. Killian moved through them, stepping into the room barely sparing a glance for the doors across the room where other Omegas were frantically trying to get out. Killian could see Sanctuary security trying to enter through what must be another chained entrance. The Omegas were so panicked they didn't realize that he'd opened one set of the doors. Pushing on the portal hindered the security trying to get in as the Alphas tried to get the doors open without hurting the Omegas. Once again, the security staff's lack of experience was a serious problem.
Letting that thought drift away, he focused on his only concern, and he moved into the dining room. Tables and chairs lay strewn around the room like a tornado had blown through. Glass and ceramic shards littered the floor. Rattling and shouts from the other Alphas trying to get into the room and the wailing cries from Omegas faded into the background. Moving further into the room, Killian kept his eyes moving across the space.
Spotting the glass on the floor inside of the dining hall garden-facing windows, Killian immediately determined where the intruders had made their entry.
Mother fucking trees! If Blossom was unharmed, he was going to take a chainsaw to those fucking trees himself.
If she was unharmed.
He tried not to think of the alternative, but he couldn't stop his mind from going there. What if she was hurt, and the last time he'd seen her, he'd made her cry.
Told her he wasn't her Alpha.
Sent her away.
He'd thought he'd been doing the right thing for both of them. He wasn't a good Alpha, and she deserved the best. She deserved everything in the world she desired. All he had to offer was a lifetime locked to his side.
But with the very real possibility that she was now gone forever, he realized it was too late for both of them. Unfortunately for her, she was made to be his, and he was no longer able to fight it.
Praying to all the deities he didn't believe in but had encountered in his worldwide travels, he swore that if... no, when, he had her back in his arms, he would never let her go. She was stuck with him for better or worse, and they would figure out how to make it work.
She was his.
Finally! Mother fucker, stop wallowing and get to work. You know how to do this. Find the Omega. Eliminate the target. Acknowledging his claim on Abby made the Alpha in his mind lessen the attack on his mental bonds. Killian's head stopped pounding, allowing him better focus and concentration on the task at hand.
Find the Omega.
Eliminate the target.
Tactical training regarding his own safety would have him opening the other door for the remaining security officers trying to get inside. Warnings about entering a battle zone without appropriate gear and backup echoed from his past, but his focus was entirely on finding his Omega. The security were fully grown Alphas and supposed professionals. If they couldn't get through one measly locked door, he didn't want them providing back up anyway.
Scanning the dining room, Killian moved to the open door leading to the kitchens where Blossom should have been on clean-up duty. Avoiding the broken glassware and furniture, he crouched against the wall next to the door hanging open by a single hinge. Using his enhanced training and senses, he searched the kitchen for scents before he moved to enter the room.
The lingering scents from dinner wafted over his palate first. Nothing caught his attention as out of the ordinary at first. Chicken, parmesan, pasta, and garlic bread filtered through his olfactory senses, and he quickly cataloged and discarded them as known and unthreatening.
Fear.
The distinct scents of fear from several Omegas. Chef Erin's cinnamon scent was so spicy with fear and anger it made him want to sneeze, but he breathed past the feeling. At least four other Omegas had been in the room. Abby's scent was there but faint. The bitterness of the scents hindered his ability to pinpoint whether or not the scents were from the last day or the last few minutes without taking more time to filter out the scents one by one.
Time he didn't have.
Movement from the back of the kitchen drew his attention, and the sound of something scraping against the floor out of his line of sight made him abandon his post by the entrance. A dull, throbbing, pounding sounded from the back of the kitchen, and Killian made his choice. Abby needed him now.
Slipping into the room, still crouched on the balls of his feet, he stealthily made his way down a line of metal prep tables lined up all in a row. On the other side of a large metal chest high counter were the ovens and fryers. Thanks to the solid steel, he couldn't see down that row so he moved to the end of the prep tables before checking around the corner. Not seeing anyone, he moved around the end of the tables to check down the row of equipment.
No one. Not an Omega or target in sight.
The intruder alarm for Sanctuary finally started to blare overhead along with the flashing lights that flickered along the walls. Huffing out a frustrated snarl, he had to focus his senses more on the kitchen to pick up any clues over the cacophony of the siren.
Still crouched down at the end of the first row of tables, the sound of something metallic hitting the floor and a muffled whimper forced him to move with speed and intent towards the back of the kitchen. Mentally going over the layout, he realized the noise came from the same direction as the door to the kitchen's loading bay. The smell of gunpowder and lemons burned his nose, and he moved around a large pot resting on its side on the floor.
Reaching the back wall with the commercial walk-in freezers and refrigerators, he acknowledged the rhythmic thumping from the closest reefer without moving toward it. Stopping in his tracks, movement in the open doorway grabbed his attention.
He made eye contact with Tobias.
At first, the brunette Omega struggling in his arms caused Killian's heart to seize, but the burnt lemon scent gave him a millisecond of respite. Catrina kicked and wiggled trying to break free from Tobias' hold. Catching her gaze, he saw the fear glowing in her blue eyes before they flared open with hope upon spotting him.
She tried to reach out to him, but with a mocking twitch of his eyebrow, Tobias disappeared out the open door, slamming it behind him. While Killian moved with his impressive speed, Tobias still managed to get the door braced enough that it took Killian extra precious seconds to get it unblocked. By the time he forced open the door to the loading bay, all he could see driving away were taillights.
Killian lifted his face and roared his fury to the night sky. He knew Catrina was gone, but did that mean they already had Abby in the car? Had he missed it?
He'd tried to do the right thing. Tried to set her free, and it may have cost him everything.
Unlocking the cage in his mind, Killian mentally greeted the feral Alpha that emerged. No longer fighting himself, Killian and his Alpha were one in their purpose.
Find their Omega.
Keep her safe.
Bite her.
Bond her.