You wish you could say that you stopped crying by the time you made it to Caleb's apartment, but when he opens the door with a concerned expression, the tears are still pouring down your cheeks at full force.
"Shit," he mumbles, gesturing for you to step inside. "What's wrong? Come in. I'll get you something warm to drink."
You nod weakly. It's humiliating to constantly be so helpless, but you're past the point of caring right now. After the night you had, you need someone to be by your side. Someone you can trust. Someone who won't fuck you over like everyone else does.
Caleb turns the kettle on, then leads you towards the couch and wraps a blanket around your cold, shivering body. Your vision somehow seems to be getting blurrier by the second, which is strange, all things considered. You weren't crying like this when you were trapped with two vampire gangsters. Perhaps that's because you were too afraid to. Now that the adrenaline has worn off, it's as if all your emotions have come flooding out.
"Are you okay?" Caleb asks breathlessly. After a few moments, he stops and shakes his head. "No... sorry. That was a stupid question. What I meant was, do you want to tell me what happened? Or is it something you'd rather not talk about?"
You want to tell him what happened, but you can't. You'll be killed if you say too much. Even worse, you might end up putting Caleb in danger. There aren't very many good people in your life, but the last thing you want is to ruin the lives of those you care about.
"I'm just... tired," you settle on, smothering yourself with the blanket. "Everything is exhausting. I don't know what to do anymore. I'm so, so tired."
Caleb frowns. "Is it because of money? Has the situation gotten worse? I know you've been struggling with it for a while, but like I said, I can always help pitch in as a last resort. We can figure something out together. I promise."
He gently squeezes your hand and offers you a reassuring smile. You wish you had the strength to smile back, but you're barely conscious after the evening's harrowing events. It's a miracle you're even still alive right now.
Then again, death would probably have been a more merciful fate.
"It's not just money. There's other stuff going on too," you say, intentionally keeping things vague.
The irony is that you're not even lying. It's not just about money anymore. Money is the whole reason you got yourself into this mess and got involved with Felix in the first place, but it has spiraled out of control, beyond what you thought was even possible.
In an attempt to pay Johnny off and reclaim ownership of your life, you got involved with yet another group of criminals.
Wherever your shitty parents are right now, they're surely laughing at your misery.
"I'm sorry to hear that." Caleb lowers his gaze to the ground and sighs. "I get that you might not feel comfortable confiding in me. I don't intend to try and pressure the answers out of you. I just want to make sure you're safe."
"I'm alright," you lie. "I just... really don't feel well, and I didn't know who else to call. Sorry for bothering you this time of night."
"There's no way it's a bother," Caleb says, shaking his head profusely. "From now on, whenever you need anything, I promise to be there for you. I know I haven't been the most reliable person lately, but I'm going to do better. I want to know you can count on me."
You strain a smile, but it feels foreign upon your cold lips.
"Okay. Thanks, Caleb. I really appreciate it."
He doesn't say anything for a while. You bury yourself deeper in the blanket, shivering occasionally. You were so worked-up over the Karl and Felix situation that you didn't even realize how cold it was outside. The warmth of a safe home is helping soothe your frayed nerves. Just a bit.
Caleb suddenly clears his throat. "You... aren't going to ask me why?"
"Why what?"
"Why I wasn't answering any of your messages before," he mutters, visibly ashamed. "I thought for sure you would bring it up by now."
"Oh."
You blink wearily. It's true that you were worried about it for a while, but you figured that he must have had his reasons. You were afraid that he didn't want to be friends with you anymore, but since he opened up his home to you in the middle of the night, you doubt that's actually the case.
"Shit happens," you shrug. "I understand. I was planning to give you space and wait until you reached out to me. Well, up until I had a meltdown earlier, at least."
Caleb clenches his jaw. "I'm sorry, [Name]."
"You don't have to say sorry."
"No, I do. The fact that you forgave me so easily makes me feel even guiltier about it. Ever since that asshole Kai came into the picture... I've been really out of it. Just remembering that day makes me sick to my stomach. I know it's not an excuse for ignoring you, but I felt so ashamed about not being able to stand up to him that I acted really pathetic. I shouldn't have avoided you, especially when he's the one to blame. I'm really, really sorry."
Caleb looks like he's about to start crying as well, but he swallows his shame and sadness, quickly sporting a smile.
"Well, thank you for hearing me out. I wasn't trying to stress you out even more right now. It sounds like the tea's ready. I'll be right back."
He stands up from the couch, and your misty eyes trail after him. You weren't expecting him to feel so guilty about ignoring you. It goes without saying that you don't want him to feel bad, but as awful as it sounds, you're relieved.
If you were to lose Caleb as a friend, you're not sure how much longer you'd be able to hold out.
You try not to imagine it. A few moments later, he returns with a mug filled to the brim with tea and carefully hands it to you.
"It's super hot, so be careful," he warns.
You nod and take the mug into your hands, blowing on the liquid's surface several times before taking a sip. As expected, it is hot, but it's exactly what your weak, shivering body needs right now. You can feel some of your strength returning to you. You're still in no condition to work tomorrow, but perhaps that's for the best. Your body and mind need a break from everything. For a few days, you'd like to try and delude yourself into thinking you have a perfectly average, perfectly normal life.
Even though it probably won't work.
"How is it?" Caleb asks worriedly. "Sorry. I wasn't really sure what you liked. I have other options if that one's no good."
"This is perfect," you reassure. "Thanks again."
Caleb smiles and nods, opting to remain silent while you drink your tea. You don't mind the quiet, funnily enough. You know that you're not alone in this moment. There's someone kind and trustworthy by your side. Compared to what you experienced earlier, you may as well be in heaven right now.
Everything is tranquil for a while. Peaceful. You sip your tea with your eyes closed, weighed down by exhaustion. You feel as though you can finally afford to rest.
Not for long, though.
"Wait... [Name]?" Caleb says. "Is your neck okay? That's... a big bandage. What happened?"
You flinch involuntarily. He's never noticed your bite marks before, mainly because they're usually really small and fade away in time, and you're pretty good at covering up your neck when you go in to work.
But this instance is different. Since Felix basically mauled you, the mark he left was surely noticeable. When you woke up, Karl had already dressed the wound and applied a bandage to it, but it's not the sort of thing you can hide. You didn't even stop to consider what would happen if Caleb saw it. You were too overwhelmed and desperate for a place to go.
"It's nothing," you quickly dismiss. "Just a nasty rash. All the stress has taken a toll on my skin. This happens sometimes."
Caleb doesn't seem convinced. In fact, he leans in even closer to get a better look, and you choke back a gasp, shuffling away from him in a hurry.
"Wh-What is it?" you swallow. "I told you, it's fine. Don't worry. I'm not in pain or anything. It's just an ugly rash and I'm a little self-conscious about it."
It takes him a while to muster up the courage to say the next words, and he looks you right in the eye as he does.
"Is someone... hurting you?"
Shit.
You suppose it's not too surprising he would jump to that conclusion-which is the right conclusion, in any case. You nearly died tonight. He doesn't even realize that just a few hours ago, you were lying lifeless on the cold floor of your apartment.
But telling him the truth is simply not an option. Karl made it very clear what would happen if you went around running your mouth.
"It's a rash," you say confidently. "I get that you're worried right now, but it's really not like that. I just got overwhelmed earlier. I'm perfectly safe."
Caleb still doesn't look convinced, and your forced responses likely aren't helping.
But he must realize that you're not going to be fully honest with him. You can see how much it pains him to know that you have yet to reach that level of trust. He must think you're pulling back from him because he ignored you for so long.
"Okay," he mumbles softly. "As long as you're safe. But if anything changes, please let me know. I'll do whatever it takes to protect you. That much I can promise."
You wholeheartedly believe him, which is exactly why you'll never be able to come clean.
"Okay," you say, straining yet another smile. "Thank you, Caleb. If anything happens, you'll be the first to know."
Silence settles over you once more, but unlike earlier, it doesn't make you feel at ease.
...
"I'll take the couch tonight," Caleb offers. "I'm sure you must be really tired, so you need to be able to get some rest. I already put clean bedsheets and blankets on the bed. Hopefully you'll be comfortable there."
You nod appreciatively. Even if you say you'd rather sleep on the couch so as not to inconvenience him, you get the feeling that he'll insist. You're too tired to protest, in any case. With your body on the verge of breaking down, you just want to collapse and fall into a state of unconsciousness.
Caleb shows you to the bedroom and helps you get settled in with everything you could possibly need, including some oversized clothes to sleep in. Come tomorrow, you'll have to deal with the matter of the broken window in your apartment. You wish time would stop flowing. Every day somehow seems to bring something worse than the last.
"All good?" Caleb affirms. "If there's anything I missed, just let me know."
You shake your head. "No, this is perfect. Thank you so much. I know I disrupted you in the middle of the night, so I really do appreciate you helping me out. I'm not sure how I'll be able to pay you back... but I'll do whatever I can."
"We're friends," Caleb smiles. He gently pats you on the shoulder. "It's normal for friends to help each other out. Seriously, don't worry about it. I'm happy to do this."
"But still. Thank you."
You bid each other goodnight, then he heads off to the living room. You turn off the lights, but leave the door open a crack. You feel better this way. Safer.
And so, you fall asleep.
Or rather, that's what you would like to say.
The truth is that you keep tossing and turning. Even though you know you're no longer alone, the fact that you and Caleb are a wall apart makes you feel sick to your stomach. Every time your eyes close, you remember how Felix snuck up on you unsuspected and violently plunged his fangs into your neck.
You remember the pain, the fear, and the helplessness-and before you even realize it, you begin to hyperventilate.
"C-Caleb?"
He doesn't respond, which makes you panic even more. You shoot up from the bed with a gasp and practically sprint to the living room, but he isn't there.
Dread washes over you. Where did he go? There's no way Karl sent someone to follow you home already... right? Because that would mean that you've compromised Caleb's safety. It would mean that his fate is as good as sealed, just like yours.
Just as you're about to start full-on sobbing, you hear the sound of a door opening, and Caleb steps into the living room.
"[Name]?" he frowns. "What's wrong? Hey. Hey, it's okay," he reassures, quickly wrapping you in his arms. "I'm here. What happened?"
You swallow your tears and cling to him, shaking all over. "I-I'm sorry. I didn't know where you were, so... I got worried. I thought you might have... l-left me."
"I just went to the bathroom real quick. There's no way I would leave you. I promise."
He smiles, squeezing you gently, but firmly. You're too distraught to notice the faint blush on his cheeks, but even if you had, you still would have said the same thing.
"Can we... sleep together?"
It only takes a second for Caleb's eyes to go wide, and this time, you do spot his blush.
"Sleep together?" he blinks in disbelief. "As in, you and me? Like... in the same bed?"
You nod hastily. "Yeah. I understand if you're uncomfortable with it. I just really don't want to be alone right now, even if you're right in the next room. I'm sorry. You have every right to refuse. I'll even sleep on the floor beside the couch if you'll let me."
He awkwardly looks away, and you notice him swallow hard, his Adam's apple bobbing in his throat.
"M-Maybe sleeping in the same bed isn't the best idea," he stammers. "But I can sleep with you in the bedroom. I'll just put some blankets down on the ground and I should be fine."
You hug him for a few more seconds and mumble another 'thank you'. He proceeds to move his blankets from the couch to the bedroom, and grabs a few more to cushion the area he'll be sleeping on. You feel bad making him sleep on the floor, but he keeps insisting you take the bed and won't even consider otherwise.
Once you're in bed, Caleb covers you up with the blankets and smiles warmly. It's your first time being tucked in like this. As far back as you can remember, your parents never showed you such affection. Perhaps they did, when you were still an infant, but you've never known what it feels like. Until now.
It feels really, really nice. Almost enough to make you start crying all over again.
"There you go," Caleb says. "All warm and comfy?"
You nod. "Yes. Thank you so much. I'm sorry for being a pain."
"Like I said, you have nothing to be sorry for. I want to help however I can. This isn't even worth mentioning."
He turns off the lights, then lays down on his makeshift futon. Even though the room is dark, you can hear the faint sound of him breathing beside you, and it helps your anxiety settle a tad.
But you still can't escape the horrific feeling of Felix pinning you to the ground and forcibly draining your blood. You keep imagining his greedy hands roaming all over your body, giving you no chance to put up a fight.
Without even thinking it through, you lean over the edge of the bed and call out to Caleb.
"I'm sorry," you mumble in the dead of night. "Is it okay if I hold your hand...?"
Caleb rolls over. It's too dark to make out his expression, but you can only assume that he must be surprised.
"O-Okay," he replies shyly. "Let me scoot closer a bit. Will it work? The bed and floor might be too far apart."
He reaches up to grab your hand, and you let out a sigh of relief when his warm fingers envelop your own. It certainly helps, but he's right. This is an extremely uncomfortable position to sleep in, with one of you reaching all the way up and the other struggling to reach down.
Fuck it. You're past the point of being embarrassed anymore.
"Are you sure you can't sleep next to me in bed?" you try again. "I really would feel a lot better with you right next to me. I promise I won't ask again, but I just wanted to check one last time. If there's any way you'd be okay with it... it would really mean a lot."
You aren't trying to guilt him into anything, but you realize how it must come across. He's already opened up his home to you and taken you in without question in the middle of the night. Perhaps you're being too needy at this point. You should be grateful for what he's already done for you.
You squeeze his hand, clinging to its warmth for as long as possible. You're prepared for him to reject you. Even if you're friends, there are certain things that just can't be done.
"...alright."
The response catches you off guard, and before you can say anything else, Caleb stands up and gets into bed right next to you. The bed is big enough to fit both of you comfortably, but you're very much aware of how close he is. His body heat is even radiating onto you.
It brings you relief, and comfort, and you finally feel like you'll be able to fall asleep.
"Do you still want me to hold your hand?" Caleb asks, voice faintly a whisper.
"If you don't mind... yes, please."
Once again, his hand wraps around yours. Your eyelids fall shut, and you take a steady, quiet breath. You've finally calmed down enough for the exhaustion to overwhelm you. You're barely able to form a lucid thought anymore.
The past few hours have been more awful than you could have ever imagined, and your future looks bleak at best. But at least right here, right now... everything is fine.
In this moment, you are at peace.
...
"Good morning, [Name]."
For the first time since your parents abandoned you, you awaken to something other than an empty room.
Caleb is smiling down at you, and truly, he is a sight for sore eyes. You find a smile forming on your own lips as you slowly sit up upright in the bed.
"Sorry for waking you, but I made breakfast," he says, holding out a tray of food. "You can go back to sleep afterwards if you're still tired. I just figured you would want to eat it while it's still warm."
You glance towards the clock. It's already later than you would ever allow yourself to sleep in, but you've decided not to go in to work today. You'll call in and say you're sick or something. Your body is simply too weak right now. Besides, the money Karl gave you should help tide you over for a while.
"This is great," you reassure. "Thanks, Caleb. It looks really yummy."
Needless to say, it's also your first time having breakfast in bed, because no one has ever made it for you before. Caleb sits next to you as you both polish off your plates. It feels warm and comfortable, and you wish it would never end.
But unfortunately, it must.
Once you're done eating, you realize that it's time for you to leave. Caleb has his own responsibilities to deal with. He can't just cater to your needs 24/7. He's a kind, selfless guy, but that doesn't mean you should take advantage of him.
You smile in an attempt to try and hide your disappointment. "So, I should get going-"
"What do you want to do today?"
"...huh?"
"I'm not working today," Caleb says. He pauses to tilt his head to the side. "And hopefully... you're not working either? Because if you're not, I was thinking we could take it easy and hang out. Let's go out someplace and do something fun."
You blink. It's true that you have no intention of working, but is it really okay to keep sponging up his time? You hope he doesn't feel pressured into taking care of you.
"Is that really okay?" you ask. "I'd love to hang out, but I wasn't sure if you were busy or not. I promise I'm alright. You don't need to worry about me, because I feel a lot better after staying here."
Caleb grins. "I love hanging out with you, and it's not often that you're free, so of course it's alright. I haven't really planned anything special, but maybe we can talk a walk and figure it out as we go? And we can always come back here later if we don't find anything. I have tons of games for us to play, after all."
"Let's go somewhere," you blurt. You'd really rather not get destroyed at video games again. He's so much better than you it's not even funny.
"Pfft," he chuckles. "You jumped on that right away. Do you hate playing games with me that much?"
"It's not that I hate it. It's just that my self-confidence can only handle so much."
"Well, I still think you'll get better over time, and one day, you'll be the one kicking my ass."
"In another reality, maybe," you sigh.
He chuckles again. You take a few minutes to grab your clothes from last night out of the washing machine and get changed, and soon enough, you're out the door.
Neither of you know where you're headed, but the arcade is clearly off-limits, and that doesn't even need to be said aloud. You wonder what else there is to do in the city. Maybe you could visit a nice pastry shop. Some dessert might be nice.
The day seems to be full of endless possibilities. Realistically speaking, you should probably call your landlord to deal with the issue of the broken window as soon as possible, but you've been trying to push the issue to the back of your mind and enjoy this simple bliss while it lasts.
And that was the plan.
Up until you crossed paths with a familiar face.
"[Name]?"
You don't even spot him right away because you're too busy happily chatting and laughing with Caleb. Without even realizing it, you pass by a flower shop, and someone is outside the storefront putting various potted plants on display.
"Oh! Elliot!"
You haven't seen him in a little while, and it's undoubtedly a welcome sight. This must be the flower shop he works at that he mentioned before. He said he normally stocks and moves products in the back, and since he's stronger than the average human, he must be responsible for setting up most of the displays too. You're lucky you ran into him like this.
"Do you two know each other?" Caleb asks.
You nod happily. "Mhm! This is my friend Elliot. We met while I was working a shift at the coffee shop." You turn towards the blond and smile. "Hey, Elliot. How have you been?"
Elliot doesn't respond right away. He's still holding a big potted plant in his hands, which would likely feel extremely heavy to the average person, but naturally, it doesn't seem to faze him.
"Hi, [Name]." He presses his lips together, making a conscious effort to hide his fangs. "Who's this?"
"Oh, I'm Caleb. It's nice to meet you." Caleb offers a handshake, then chuckles awkwardly, realizing that Elliot has both his hands full. "Sorry about that. So, you work here? This looks like a nice place. [Name], maybe we should step inside for a bit and buy some flowers? Would your friend be willing to help us pick something good?"
Elliot bristles at the comment. "You want to buy flowers? Why?"
"Um..." Caleb frowns a bit, "for the same reason everyone wants to buy flowers, I guess? I want to get something nice for [Name] to take home with her."
"You don't have to do that," you quickly reassure.
"But I want to," Caleb smiles. "We're still close to my apartment, so how about we pick out some flowers for you to take home, and we can swing back to my place to drop them off, or put them on hold and pass by here later."
You keep trying to protest and tell him that he's already done more than enough, but Caleb can be awfully stubborn when he wants to be, and he's already made up his mind.
The whole while you bicker, though, Elliot watches with wide, unblinking eyes.
So, not only do you know this guy, but you're close enough to visit his apartment? And he's even going out of his way to buy flowers for you?
Elliot's gaze turns glassy.
For some reason, he doesn't like the thought of that.
He doesn't like it one bit.