These entries were judged by andrea_guezz
These will not be numbered or put into the right order yet, cause we're still waiting on the other judge. If you don't see your entry it was most likely assigned to the other judge. We're only publishing these results now because we don't want to lose them when wattpad gets rid of DMs and we don't want to risk losing a draft.
So these are not the most organized right now. They will be numbered and the score will be added up with an overall score like the other genres when we have all of the results. Sorry for the inconvenience.
Just Dev by jeromebtches
Title: 7/10 Cover:9/10 Blurb: 8/10 Plot: 6/10 Characters: 6/10 Grammar: 8/10 Spelling : 8/10 Story flow: 6/10
Just Dev, I saw that you took it down, I liked the cover but I would remove the " written by and just write your name, I was confused by a few details of the story. So she is a model and has a a lot of scars that no one has noticed before, but models, wear different kinds of things, she can't tell the designer that she just wears things that cover her back, especially living on an island where most likely she'll be asked to to model swimsuits. Also, what is so wrong about living on the island if she has her two best friends in there? She said her new job requires her to live there, but both her besties are there, what's the matter? I was confused about where the story was going, what was the plot, I think you should review the details of the story.
KY$ y sodapopxtreme
Title:8 /10 Cover:9/10 Blurb: 9/10 Plot: 7/10 Characters: 7/10 Grammar: 8/10 Spelling : 9/10 Story flow: 7/10
KY$, I knew what KY$ meant because that's the original title was the one signed up for the contest, and I liked it as it had to do with the story, but for a new reader that doesn't know the previous name the KY$ might be confusing. I like the blurb, it starts strong, and it's intriguing. The soulmate concept it's always interesting, makes the story more appealing, and you gave it your own approach, I loved the idea of the initiator and the receiver it's exciting, very mythological, and the whole loving yourself, kudos to you! It made me anticipate reading the next chapters. Something to take into consideration, it's that while they were being attacked someone might have been able to call a family member, there are thousands of students in a regular high school, and people that live near the school would have heard the commotion and call the police, gunshots are loud, the sound is not easy to hide, If I'm not wrong they didn't kidnap kids from just one high school, so more possibilities of getting caught, and how didn't the goverment notice thousands of greek men with guns in their capital at least to try to defend the kids. If the other nations caught a whiff of this Greece would be the evil in their eyes, so the USA would get more allies. So I would change the details of the kidnapping, now, if you are writing about Greece and you are not greek, be careful of insulting them or stereotyping them You are saying they are kidnapping kids and forcing them into servitude, changing their government system, and making their clothes go a century behind, you should ask a greek person if in a way it offends them. If that's the case you could change it to a instead of Greece a made-up country that has similarities with ancient Greece When Clara says that she doesn't have self-respect do you mean self-preservation instinct?
Because punching the guard when he attacked her, seems to me like respect I like Clara, she is very straightforward and indeed she doesn't seem to have her self-preservation instinct active sometimes Now, about Xeres' past,why would the first son of an important family be forced to be an executer? He has power, his superiors would be risking a lot when he went back to his family. Again I emphasize going over the details of the war, and the kidnapping The are some entertaining funny dialogues here and there,that made me laugh, there are also some that were confusing, most of them when the teenagers were talking, like Clara talking with her friends. They were saying one thing acting the opposite, hating, and loving, each other. Now teenagers are, well, teenagers, they are volatile, but here sometimes even their dialogues don't make sense. Now, I didn't go to an american high school, and my culture is different, but these teenagers are like mean girls on steroids. So, not many people talk about abuse from wife to husband, people always associate domestic abuse from husband to wife, Kudos to you again! I didn't see anything wrong with the way you approached it, but I don't know much about this subject, one more time if you want to check the veracity of it, maybe you should ask someone, but from my non-expert point of view, it seemed ok. I got a question about the timing of Xeres' engagement and the soulmate concept. So you can't say I love you or I believe you, but you can kiss and have sex with someone else while knowing your soulmate? And didn't they say he found his soulmate a month ago, but he said he arranged his engagement after meeting her? I enjoyed the story when in the last chapters Xeres was about to ( I won't say it because that's a spoiler for people that haven't read it) it was totally unexpected, I also read when you said it was your first time writing a sex scene, again my respect to you. I just think the story needs checking of a few details.
Spring In Hades by NatashaIli
Title: 10/10 Cover: 7 /10 Blurb: 10/10 Plot: 7 / 10 Characters: 9/10 Grammar :8/10 Spelling: 8/10 Story flow: 7 / 10
I can see your passion for greek mythology, your version of the tale t's very detailed, meticulous, and descriptive. Though it's not completely loyal to the tales, who cares, there are many versions. The characters are greek gods , known for being extremely emotional, irrational, promiscous , jealous, lustful, sentimental, every emotion that we mortals feel to the maximum. You represented all of that, plus eternal love and devotion, I think every girl dreams with a handsome man that is completely besotted with her, and every person that is in a dark place wants someone comprehensive to be there for them. However, because of the extremeness of the character's actions, and the length of the story , some readers might lose interest though,it could also be the opposite, with someone that likes greek mythology, or just feels atracted to how different it is from reading normal human love stories
A Hearbeat away by diana_leone
Title: 9/10 Cover: 7/10 Blurb: 8/10 Plot: 9/10 Characters: 9/10 Grammar :10/10 Spelling:10 /10 Story flow: 10/10
The story is nicely written, when I started reading I thought it would be the usual girl who has a best friend who is a player with whom she is in love , and he too is secretly in love with her, but, you can notice the author's own writing style, and the character's own identity, the ending was a total game changer from what was expected, which I should feel sad about but I didn't, I liked it a lot. I appreciate that the title comes from a BTS song, it's a nice touch. Personally, I would modify the conversation between boy 1 and boy 2 for normal dialogue between them, right now it seems like a text message conversation. Now the cover, this is just my personal opinion, If the author wants to keep the same theme, I would change it to make him look to the front and that his clothes don't mix with the background. But in my opinion, the cover needs to be more summer-ish, they are working as lifeguards on the beach on summer vacation, also maybe put the three of them on the cover, it's a love triangle after all. This short story in my opinion also gives the author an open door for a sequel, maybe? What happened with the guy she didn't get together with? Is he in love with another girl now? Did the relationship between the guy she chose and her last? Will the other guy come back to mess things up between them or did he give up?
She is lost by pretty_book8
Title: 7/10 Cover: 7/10 Blurb: 6 /10 Plot: 6/10 Characters: 6 /10 Grammar :4/10 Spelling: 5/10 Story flow:6 /10
She is lost, there are many grammar, and spelling mistakes, and changes in the tenses. The prologue isn't exactly a prologue, is more like a summary of the whole story. So, some readers might say, that they already know how the story goes, and not read it. At the end of the prologue, there's a phrase, find out, the prologue says they got back together. Find out what happens when Clara comes back. The sentence find out is alone, needs something next to it, because if it's alone then it doesn't say anything about the story, it doesn't intrigue the reader. I was also confused by some of the character's actions and feelings, like the moment when the kidnapping takes place. Her stepmother causally had in her pocket a picture of Mary? Who carries printed pictures around in modern days? Specially in their pockets? And of a girl they hate? Don't you mean she showed them a picture on her phone? Or maybe a picture of her family that she has in her wallet? Because why would she have a picture of Mary in her wallet? Unless it is to fool everyone. Why is she offering to pay if she already has something over their heads? The supposed proof that they were planning to break into a place. And isn't she scared to get close to three men who were planning to break into a store? Also, Clara was happy over a kidnapping in the first chapter, it doesn't make sense, yeah maybe the lady gets jealous later because of Mary 's relationship with her son, but being happy over a kidnapping? In the first chapter when she doesn't even know her? I understand there are bad characters, this is the type of mom that would give money to their son's girlfriend so she'll leave him. But these moms usually have a reason, jealousy, protectiveness, and feeling superior. But during the whole story, his mother is like a walking drama. Honestly, she doesn't make sense, her
Honestly, she doesn't make sense, her stepmother makes more sense, and she has a reason to hate her, but this woman hated her immediately, didn't even try to be polite on the first meeting, and then later told her son she doesn't like her. Or maybe hating her, at first sight is ok, it does happen, but downright calling her bitch? And, why would her mother even announce the kid? I suppose she wants grandchildren that share her blood because she is portrayed as that kind of mother. Her motives are unclear, it seems like she does whatever just to annoy her son. Besides if John got so many problems with his mother, why not move out? Leave her the house, find a place for himself? Could you explain that in the story? Deepen more on their relationship and his mother's motives. I do like the names of the characters, they are common, his name isn't an Italian name or the classic names for bad boys, her name is also very common. I like it it gives it a more realistic sense. I got a question, about Andrew, what does he do? John is the one that pays everything for him? I was confused with the pace of the story, twelve chapters, and the kid already appeared, isn't it too early? It seems like the story is almost wrapping up, but there haven't been any special moments between them, Where are the moments between them, when can we see them fall in love? It needs some fluffy moments out of the plot, moments that make a reader's heart flutter.
Mosaicked Feelings by TessaYoung5
Title: 10/10 Cover: 10/10 Blurb: 9/10 Plot: 8/10 Characters: 9/10 Grammar: 8/10 Spelling : 7/10 Story flow: 8/10
Mosaicked feelings, This story made me confuse, I actually read it twice ( until, I think chapter 17 the first time), while I reading for the contest, because I already had the scores and then I was doing a last time checking, and ..DUN, DUN, DUN...Hayden is suddenly Edward and Edward is suddenly Hayden? the stalker guy and the guy from the past are both Hayden too, I read until the beach scene, and now... PUFF, GONE, it, suddenly disappeared. Now this kind of situation has happened with the other stories, but they just changed small details, I was actually liking sweet Hayden ( I did think he seemed a little too invested on her), and then, BAM! I still enjoyed both versions, the unexpected second version made me want to keep reading to figure out what's wrong with those two. I liked how you played with the reader's mind. I was like what's going on she's crazy? Is he crazy? Am I the one who is assuming things and is crazy? But I wouldn't classify the second version as a romance story, more like psychological, so people that are looking for a regular romance book aren't the audience to it. I was going to talk about the beautiful cover from before, Which was the one I evaluated, I would be attracted to that cover seeing the book for the first time, it was so pretty and colorful, but I was going to say that It didn't fit the new version, writing this I saw you changed it, I think the new cover is more fitting, the title is also cool. Please bear with me if I mix up the details, as I was a little confused reading the second version trying to forget the other one. Analyzing Michelle's character before, it seemed a little forced like she is super intelligent, super pretty, and everybody likes her. Sick mom, abusive dad, bad boy, interested in her Then Hayden ( Now Edward) also seemed way too perfect, blonde hair, blue eyes,
blue eyes, bad boy looking, super invested in her even thought she continues to reject him, also his mom died and he has a locket with her picture " and it's the last thing his mother left him. While writing this, I think this is what you wanted to project, even if someone looks beautiful, perfect, we don't know what demons they are hiding inside them.
Never Summer Again by daniavons
Title: 10/10 Cover: 8/10 Blurb: 9/10 Plot: 10/10 Characters: 9/10 Grammar :9/10 Spelling: 9/10 Story flow:10 /10
Never summer again, I was impressed when I read it's your first book, to be the first, it's really good. I'm not completely sure I like the idea of the rules to introduce Lydia's character and her struggles at the beginning, but I do like what you did at the ending the duality of the Rules- life lessons. I enjoyed connecting with this group, not only Lydia and Mark but all of them, you paid attention to the details of the stories of the side characters, making this not only a love story but many real life stories, if say reader doesn't connect with Lydia, they might connect with Gloria, Patrick, Nate, Alex, Mark Lydia is the protagonist but she wasn't always right, none of them were, she wasn't always the victim female lead, she hurt people too, she was a young girl figuring out life, there were even times when I didn't like her. I especially enjoyed the parents drama which is something I think we can all empathize with, the part when Lydia is talking about parents in chapter nine especially touched my soul There were many emotions in this story, many dumb things the characters did, and many dramatic moments, that made the story very entertaining, I first thought that the chapters were too long, but then I kept reading. About Lydia's feelings in the beginning before the whole Mark-Lydia situation, there is a part where she says she stopped feeling, then she says she loves her boyfriend, a none feeling person would say something like I'm with him because he is a good catch. Also in the beginning, I would personally change the introduction of the characters, to something smaller and then later reveal more details, right now there are many paragraphs in a row with descriptions of each character the looks, background, likes and dislikes, relationship status, memories with them and it feels like a lot. I have to give you the pr
I have to give you the props as an author, writing a sex scene it's difficult, but you made the chapters of their first time it was romantic, funny, and sad at the same time.
Seeing Myself In You byOttileTow
Title: 8/10 Cover: 9/10 Blurb: 9/10 Plot: 8 /10 Characters: 9/10 Grammar : 10/10 Spelling: 10 /10 Story flow: 8/10
Seeing Myself in you Seeing myself in you, the story is adorable, they are a cute couple, and I'm rooting for them. It's delightful to see them fall in love and discover themselves and their sexuality. Overall, I think the author does a great job of making the reader feel connected with the character's struggles like their sexuality, family relationships, peer pressure, and difficulties to make and keep friends. However, in some parts, the author uses phrases like "I feel sad, I feel happy, I feel nervous" where something more descriptive could be written, although it's like a combination, sometimes the emotion is described, sometimes it isn't. I think the author should highlight more the part before the hug when they touch or say something tender to each other, the hug was really cute, with it being an impulse and Ye jun jumping a little and then accepting it, but they didn't react when one was holding the wrist of the other to guide, calling the other adorable, or touching the other 's hand to console, men are very conscious about being affectionate or just simply touching each other, even with their own father's and brothers, so these are very weighty moments. To me, the story is very lovely and covers topics that I think we all struggle with, I hope its audience grows
Foolish Games by Kolgrim83
Title: 9 /10 Cover: 5 /10 Blurb: 9/10 Plot: 8 / 10 Characters: 10 /10 Grammar :10/10 Spelling: 10 /10 Story flow: 9/10
Foolish games, this pair had awkward moments, bickering, caring, supporting moments, and sexual tension so entertaining to read. I liked seeing the development of the characters through the years, seeing them grow up as individuals and in their relationship. All the characters are well thought out and written, Joni's stuck-up, loud, vain, flirty, confident, cheeky, brat personality, is so fun to read, you kinda wanna know what he'll plot next, but there is more to him than just a brat, he do gets insecure, and makes lots of mistakes, he's still a young man growing up, combined with his practically opposite Misha who is the oh so serious, I don't show my feelings, I don't sing the happy birthday song, it's amusing to read the moments when Misha loses his cool to the brat. I also value a lot Joni's father and Stepmother as characters, they are accepting, caring, and worry a lot, Ivo's meddling, Chris too is very well written he believes what his mind is making up, and made me think about how a person can turn 360 degrees in a relationship and how everyone, no matter how they confident they look on the outside could be a victim of abuse. I think you portrayed the mind of an abuser and the trauma and feelings of the victim remakably, now I'm not an expert on this, but as a reader, I could empathize with his disbelief, disgust, shame, anger , and desire to get better. If you ask me what would I change? The cover, it looks slovenly, it seems like just a any background , with a square image , and any font, give it some personality, making it more detailed and pretty, you could still use the same image, but change the background and the font. I almost forgot, this is the first time that I read a book set in Finland, it was a welcome surprise to read about finnish characters.
Fire On Ice by ashaisaa
Title: 10/10 Cover: 8/10 Blurb: 9/10 Plot: 9/10 Characters:10 /10 Grammar :10/10 Spelling: 10/10 Story flow:10/10
Fire on Ice, The story is passionate, beautiful, sad, romantic, thrilling, and emotional. I love good enemies to lover, and professional dancing to me is so artistic and so beautiful, I had never read a story about professional ice skating, so I was curious to read how you would describe the character's passion and devotion to skating, to me you did it outstandingly Samuel's and Justin's relationship to me is like the prince sweeping the princess off her feet, Justin brought beauty back to Samuel's world with his goofy, free personality, when Samuel was so tired of everything, though they are and will be faced with wind and storm, they find warmth in each other. I'm curious to know what will happen now that the Victor problem has been solved and new problems are looming for the couple. Though the Victor problem has been solved, I don't want you to forget to mention Samuel's unresolved struggles such as his eating disorder and search for perfection. I also got a question about Victor's family, if Varian is the older brother, why didn't their parents decide to engage him first? What would I change from this story? In my opinion, the cover, in every chapter, you put nice pictures, that in my opinion look better than the one on the cover, and have better definition, and I don't know if it's just me, but I feel like this picture looks old fashioned, your name is also more to the left. Though this is totally your choice. I would also check again the chapters to correct small errors, such as like writing the character's previous name or the wrong pronoun. I almost forgot to say, I really like your playlist