i don't feel that i've accomplished all that much today, and even though i usually don't, it feels more wrong than usual. each breath i take feels more tiring than usual, and each thought i have sends chills of worry to my core.
it is not fair how i act about things.
i am not any better than you.
you are a better person than me, who cheers and jeers towards your shortcomings.
it makes me cry, but i can't turn this brain off.
maybe i wish i could, and i do
i think i am shouting into an empty void, and it is terrifying i have deteriorated this far in this short amount of time. i need to figure out what's wrong and fix it. please don't be worried, i'm okay enough and i eventually will.
i think i need a good cry session, because these pent-up feelings are becoming more prominent again. i don't want to struggle more to get through my days. i don't want to feel the darkness in the negative space around me, squeezing, shaping, crying. i want my attention seeking self to remember people have their own things to focus on and that i don't need their validation. i don't want people to call me a fucking pick-me girl, but i don't deserve to correct their too-accurate words.
i have a lot to work on haha