How 2 Slob

Oleh Peacebabye

3.6K 33 0

Ever'one been wonderin' how I done gone an' did it, turnin' myself into the human example of a pig stench and... Lebih Banyak

Why I did it.
So long deodorant!
Sweat Spots
Belchin' time
Showers: every other day
Stuffing Time
Bye Brush
I let the dogs out
Showers: twice a week
Less Changing
Showers: Minimal
Intimidation Display
Interruption
Stain Searchin'
In-between

Buffet Belch

149 2 0
Oleh Peacebabye

It was mighty strange that I was basically so scared I was gonna poop myself before I let out a big ol' burp. It's way more acceptable in society to burp than it is to have panties that done turned brown a long time ago. But I still felt trapped within society's rules when it came to lettin' out my burps. Maybe I was savin' 'em for when me and him were kissin'. Maybe I had some kind of mental block, like I couldn't just not care what folks thought. Maybe I just didn't have to burp every dang time I was out in public. It didn't matter none, I didn't want no psychologist diggin' into why I felt like bein' messy. I was gonna do it, and belch like a whole mess of kids after drinkin' soda.


So one day, I made sure to drink a whole bunch from the drink fountain at the local Chinese buffet. If I didn't have other reasons, I woulda been real mad to find out I burned more calories carryin' them Big Gulp cups back and forth than I could shove in my face. After gulping down tons of sugary water, I could finally feel a belch buildin' up in my squishy belly.


I didn't know when it was gonna happen so I just kept chuggin' that diabetes juice. Other folks in the buffet started wonderin' what was up with this chubby girl drinkin' all that soda. Of course, ain't nothin' wrong with me, I just wanted a big ol' attention grabbin' belch.


After chuggin' what felt like my fifth gallon of sugary water, I was ready. The pressure in my stomach was so intense it felt like nothin' else could go in. It had to come out. So I leaned back, lettin' my big belly hang out for all to see in my skimpy crop top. And then, all at once, my belly let out a giant belch. It was so loud it shook the windows and made cups rattle. And as I let out that belch, bits of food and spit flew out, creatin' a mess on the table. All the other folks in the restaurant had moved away from my stinky self, but they couldn't escape the smell and sound of my belch.


Everyone in the room turned around at the same time, coverin' their noses from the stink of a girl who ain't brushed her teeth in ages. As folks in the restaurant groaned at the smell, I just leaned back in my chair to enjoy the moment.


"Lord, that felt good... why did I ever hold those belches in!? I could go back to that there buffet at least 10 more times now!"

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