I screamed my way into consciousness, crazed beyond redemption. I threw the covers aside, staring down in panic at my legs. There were no whip marks, no blood… But it had felt so real.
I trembled as my breath continued to come in panicked rasps.
Aw… And that was only the exposition…
My heart pounded even faster as Andrew's voice invaded my thoughts. How? How did he remember the dream? Or hadn't it been a dream?
I fisted the collar of my silk nightdress, trying to ease the burning in my chest. I couldn't breathe properly anymore.
I crawled out of bed in a semi-conscious state. Andrew's face overlapped with that of my surroundings, doubling my vision.
He was laughing hard and loud, so much that I couldn't hear my own thoughts… Though I was pretty sure thinking was far from me at this point.
I made it to the drawer. Andrew laughed harder as I pulled open the compartment.
“No," I sobbed in panic as I recalled the events of yesterday. My pills were gone! “No." Tears rolled down my face with more intensity, more volume…
It's just you and me now, little Elsa. Andrew's voice taunted. And as your elder brother, you have to listen to everything I say… Even if you're asked to jump off a cliff. He laughed at that. And if you disobey… Well, my exposition must have explained what will happen…
I held my hands against both sides of my head. Andrew's voice induced a headache so intense that my eyes watered. I groaned.
“No," I repeated. It was the only word I could come up with as my tears kept coming non-stop. “Andrew please"
Please?! Do you really think that you deserve any pity?!
I pressed my hands tighter. The pain was intense, excruciating…
“Stop!" I screamed in agony. The door to my room burst open. I was curled up on the floor, sobbing profusely in response to the unbearable pain in my head. My hands had lost feeling with how hard I was straining them, but yet, it didn't help reduce the pain. “Please…” I pleaded. " Please stop…"
I felt arms wrap around me, holding me close against a broad chest. He smelled of cinnamon, most likely a remnant from his baking yesterday.
“Rachel. Baby," dad soothed, rocking me back and forth as he enveloped me in his bulk.
I think my exposition conveyed the message quite clearly. Now to my instruction…
He paused.
Stay away from Frederick Lawson…
And he went silent.
I was in so much pain that Andrew's words barely registered. I gripped dad’s shirt with both fists like my life depended on it, sobbing uncontrollably.
The pain began to dull ever so slowly…
“Dad," I said, reaching for anything concrete.
“I’m here, baby."
His baritone voice rumbled through his chest, vibrating so that I felt it due to my close proximity. He was real. And he was here, holding me, comforting me. I could feel him…
But then Andrew's whip felt so real too. Where was the guarantee that it wasn't? As if the memory was a trigger, tendrils of what was most likely static electricity passed across the exact spots where Andrew had whipped me.
I yelped.
“It's okay,Rachel," dad soothed, holding me tighter. "It's okay…"
I wasn't sure how long we remained like that, dad humming one of my favorite tunes from childhood. My intense sobbing reduced to sniffs, until it was just complete silence.
And then, I fell asleep…
***
I groaned as I turned over in bed, shutting my eyelids even tighter against the morning light.
Wait a minute… Light?
My eyes flew open. Had I slept in?
“Calm down. Today is a Saturday."
I turned to my side, startled at the sudden speech. Ms Janet sat, all prim and proper in my chair. She gazed at me with sharp brown eyes. I felt myself shrink under the scrutiny.
“Your parents were worried about leaving you alone, so they asked me to watch you," she explained. She continued to give me that stare that made me feel like a condemned criminal under a judge’s gaze.
Ms Janet had always been nice to me, but she was most likely still angry about the incident with mum’s seizure…
Silently, I sat up on the soft and comfortable bed.
“How is mum?" I asked.
She stared at me for a few seconds.
"She's fine.But I think it's best if you don't visit her for now,” she said.
I tried not to show how affected I was by those words. I had hurt mum to the extent that my mere appearance could trigger her seizures?
"I understand,” I replied.
She stared at me like she wanted to offer some comfort, but she simply sighed.
"Your father is out,but he left you breakfast in the microwave.He'll be back by noon, and Xander is in his room.”she rose, turning to leave, then stopped, sighing again.“Your mother said to tell you she loves you very much and that you shouldn't blame yourself for what happened."
My eyes clouded over.
By her tone, I was sure Ms Janet blamed me for what happened.
She stepped out, shutting the door behind her. I bit my lip. This was no time to cry.
Today was a Saturday, which meant ‘bathtub’.
To be honest, this was the only part of my therapy that I actually enjoyed. Ms Sarah had recommended it for me as a soothing technique, prescribing some therapeutic oils as well…
I took a shower before heading for the tub,cleaning it out with a towel.I let the water flow, focusing my senses on the sensation of the rushing water. It was distracting, and that was exactly what I needed.
When the water was warm enough, I plugged the drain, letting the water level rise till I was satisfied, then I added some bath salts and the therapeutic oils.
I slid down into the warm water till my head went under, but try as I might, I could not block out the memories from yesterday night.
Being tied to a pole, Andrew's nail slicing across my face, the metallic box-like room, the whip cracking through the air…
I opened my eyes suddenly in a bid to avoid the images, regretting it immediately as a painful sting shot through them. I motioned to move to the surface…
I tried to push with my legs, but nothing happened. I tried to move my arms, same thing. Panic pumped into me. I couldn't move!
Do you still think our meeting was something you cooked up in your head?
Andrew!
In shock, I parted my lips. Water rushed into my mouth, and it was too late but the time I shut my lips. I struggled with all of my strength, trying to get to the surface.
My lungs were screaming for air.My head was fogging from lack of oxygen.
Somebody help!
What was happening?! Why couldn't I move?! I was going to die!
Tears flowed from my eyes, mixing in with the bath water.
Sure, I had wanted to kill myself only a few hours ago, but I wanted to die on my own terms, not like this…
On your own terms?
Andrew laughed.
You mean just like I had control over how I died?
Everything was burning…
My eyes, my chest… Everything.
Please help! I thought frantically even though no one could hear me. Please…
Fortunately for you,sister, it is not yet time. But do not fool yourself into thinking I am not real , because I am. Even realer than most things. Stay away from Frederick Lawson…
And then I broke the surface.
~~~
*Walks in with a hoodie and a face mask*
Do you still recognize me? 😅😅
To be honest, this isn't what I planned on writing . Rachel was supposed to have a beautiful... What am I doing? 🙄🙄
I've repented. No more spoilers🤭
What do you think is the deal with Andrew? Is he really just in her head, or is he as real as he claims? 🤔
Don't worry. Surely, the next chapter won't have such an ending... If all things remain equal🌝
Thank you guys for your support so far. You are amazing😘😘
So, let's keep it up please. A vote and a comment before you leave 🥹
Lots of love❤️❤️💖💞
Btw, the 'panic attack' I talked about in the last chapter was just a major case of overreacting 😅
So, it's nothing to worry about.
To those who entered my DM to check on me, I love you🥹
But really, I'm fine😁