Jude
It's been about three weeks.
I've thankfully been discharged from the hospital for a good couple of days now. Mums been brilliant at setting up everything I need to recover at home.
Decided to stay in London for my recovery for the obvious reason that is, I don't want to be too far from Harms. Feel better about being close to her.
She's still in hospital. We're both hoping she gets discharged in the next couple of days. Doctors said she's been doing good. Rose told me she's looking much better, bruises nearly healed up on her face, arms still in a cast as is her leg but the internal injuries such as broken ribs and that nasty punctured lung of hers is all healing well.
She still has to take it easy though which might mean a little extra time in hospital. She's fuming about it. Texts me multiple times a day to let me know she misses me. Even though I visit her every other day.
I walk in to her hospital room that was basically mine throughout my stay and smile at her.
Still on the crutches so it takes me a while to get to her bed but when I do, she shifts over as always and I slip in, smile at her.
"Bruises are all healing." Trace the outline of the best face known to mankind, gently.
"Yep! Bit of makeup and I'll be back to looking like the girl you fell madly in love with." She jokes with a little grin.
"I'm looking at the girl I fell in love with." I retort.
"Love every version of you." I make sure to add.
"Even the roadkill looking one?" She says to be funny and it is so I sniff a laugh.
"Yes. I love my little trampled deer." Tap her nose.
"Aw, you called me a deer." She gushes, trying to water down her big smile.
I laugh at her cuteness, throw an arm around her. Love that I can do that now.
"How are you feeling?" She asks.
"How are you feeling." Throw the question back at her as she's the one still in hospital.
"Jude." Tosses me an unimpressed look for not answering her. Difficult like that she is. Bratty. Love it though.
"I'm good Harms. Backs feeling better as the days go on." Not completely true. Do have some pain here and there but nothing to worry about. Well, nothing for her to worry about. Doctor knows about it and said it's normal, but harms—she freaks out.
Anything and I mean anything that pops up that doesn't indicate I'm absolutely perfect, she worries about. So it's better to not tell her something so minuscule that's expected during recovery.
Plus, I know her better than anyone. She'll use my injury as a way to distract herself from her own. Loves a bit of avoidance, Harms.
"You sure?" She eyes me skeptically.
Can't ever lie to that face, so although I was planning to keep it from her, naturally—I crack.
"Bit of pain. Nothing terrible." I reveal. Harmony Simmons has made me into an absolute sap. And I can't say that I hate it. Can't keep anything from that girl.
"Bit of pain? Bit? Have you spoken to the doctor? He needs to check you out and see what this bit of pain is." She says slightly patronisingly. Unhappy with my downplaying.
"Doctor knows. He said is expected during recovery."
She doesn't reply, still looks skeptical.
"Promise." I state.
She watches me for a few seconds, looks deeply into my eyes. That's how she can tell whether I'm lying or telling the truth, or how I'm feeling. I do the same with her. Can always tell by her entire face what's going on with her, but her eyes fast track me to the answer.
"Okay. As long as he knows." She replies. Takes a steady breath. Looks like she's been holding it in for a while.
"How are you?" I question softly. Pushing some hair behind her ear and leaving my hand there because she loves it and so do I.
She shrugs.
"There's been pain, but I've got painkillers. Foots itchy and so is my arm and my leg feels heavy because of the cast and I hate the smell of my arm cast because it's disgusting, and the bruises on my face make me worried because they might scar. Also really hope I can get the fuck out of here soon." She rambles all in one breath.
Because I know her so well I've learnt to catch up on her rambling quickly. Almost manage to catch everything as she says it without having to debrief with myself for a few seconds after.
"Did you tell the doctors about the pain?" Is my first question.
"Yes, they know. Said it's normal." She rolls her eyes.
I nod. Prepare to ask my second question.
"You'll get use to the casts soon. It's just like when you fractured your foot. You'll probably get a boot soon." I encourage.
She gives me a small smile. Can still see she's a bit defeated. Been going crazy in here for weeks. She's not one that likes to sit down.
"Your bruises won't scar. They're healing up perfectly. And even if they do, you still have the best face anyones ever seen." Tell that to her softly because I'm not sure how she'll react. Might be angry and disagree, might get upset, or might love the encouragement I'm trying to give her.
Her eyes go round and sad and I feel like shit because that's just how you feel when you're in the presence of a sad Harmony. It may be your fault why she's sad, it may not be. Either way, you're upset simply because she is. Feel like shit too.
She lets out this deep and heavy sigh. I think the gravity of her accident is finally hitting her now. She's been distracted with me and us and visitors that she hasn't had time to sit and think about what happened. How traumatic and possibly life changing it was.
Pull her into me a little more, stroke her hair because that's what relaxes her.
"You have to take your time with this Harms. You were in a massive accident. I know it's frustrating but healing will take time. It won't go as fast as you want it to. It's a process." I tell her.
"I know how annoying it can be. How much you want to get better. I feel the exact same. I want to be on the pitch. Not at home. But this is the way things happened and I can't control it. I can only work to heal. The same thing you can do."
She looks to me, worried eyes and knitted eyebrows. Not speaking verbally but her face is saying it all. She's scared about this. Worried.
"I'm going to be there every step of the way. I'm not going anywhere Harms. It's me and you." I reassure. I think that little part of her that worries I'll leave because her dad did, is starting to peak through.
And I think her dad leaving again and not coming back, whilst shes in dire need, is hitting her more than she thought.
I think that, even though she sent him away. She hoped he'd come back anyways. Prove her wrong. And because he didn't, she feels abandoned all over again.
She hasn't said anything. Nothing about him. Nothing about how she feels about him visiting and then leaving. But I see it. I see it in her face and in her body language during those times where she's quiet. Not speaking. When her minds moving and racing but her lips are sealed.
There's many moments where she looks sad and I just know it's about her dad.
"We're basically locked in." I laugh to lighten the mood.
She laughs too, her eyes go round again but in the way I adore. She's happy.
"I'm here for you too. We're going to work together to get you back on the pitch." She smiles. Didn't doubt that for a minute with the way she questions my doctors as if she's studied medicine for five years and a highly trained professional.
"Oh I know you are." I laugh teasingly and she playfully hits me. Rolling her beautiful eyes.
The door knocks and in walks Mel along with Harmony's doctor.
"Hi guys." Mel smiles cheerily.
"Hi." The both of us reply at the same time.
"Harmony, we have some good news for you." The doctor smiles.
Harms looks at me first before she looks to the doctor awaiting the news.
"Tomorrow you can be discharged." He smiles brightly.
She snaps her head towards me and beams a smile out. I can tell she needed this.
"Really?" She asks big eyed and hopeful.
"Really." Mel nods with a big grin.
"Finally!" She says excitedly, sighs in relief and I swear I see her shoulders slump as if she's now really relaxed.
"Thank you so much!" She thanks both her doctor and Mel.
"No worries. We'll give your mum a call and let her know. And I'll pop back later to discuss with the both of you the plan moving forward once you're discharged." Her doctor informs but I can tell Harmony isn't listening.
She's smiling too much to be listening. All she's thinking about is the fact that she's getting out of hospital. So I listen to everything he says for her, so I know the proceedures. Let her just be happy and live in the moment.
They both leave the room and she turns to me, still smiling her head off.
"Finally get to be in my own bed." She plants a kiss on my lips.
"Bugs is making it home." I smile pleased.
"Bugs? As in bunny? I thought I was a deer?" She tilts her head confused.
"You're both, but...I think you're more like a little bunny rabbit." I laugh.
"Why? Because I'm absolutely adorable?" She smirks.
"No."
"No?"
"No—yeah...but no."
"What? I'm confused yes or no?"
"No and yes." I confirm
She squints her eyes at me in utter confusion and I laugh again because she's so funny without trying.
"I'm not really enjoying this little confusion game." She'd cross her arms right now if she could. Does so when she's fed up.
"You're adorable. Always. But that's not why I'm calling you bugs." I clarify.
"Then why?" She questions.
"Because bunny's hop around everywhere, never really still, full of energy. Incredibly sociable. And...very cute." I grin, poke her cheek.
"I do not hop." She says nose in the air because she's proud and annoying.
I roll my eyes with a knowing smile.
"Right you don't physically hop but...you are quite...flighty? Fidgety? I don't know. You just don't keep still really."
"Jude Victor William Bellingham!" She hits me.
"Flighty? Fidgety? I am not!"
"You are." I counter
"Not!" She responds adamantly
"Very much are Harms."
"Very much not Jude!" She scowls
"It's going to be a very very long little life with you." Lick away a smile. Chuckle a bit as I look at her annoyed face. Still looks cute.
"Yours is going to really focus on the little part if you keep playing with me." She threatens.
"Is that so?" Get close to her face so she can be quiet because she gets flustered when I'm close to her and stops talking.
"Well...yes." Bit quieter now. Voice wavering.
My eyes flick to her lips for two seconds before I meet her eyes again.
"I like your face." I tell her, examining it.
"I like your face too." She smiles, examining mine.
"Yours is more perfect." I compliment.
"You look like a Disney prince shut up." She scoffs with an eye roll.
Laugh at that.
"Well thank you." I respond and she smiles back at me as I smile at her.
"You know....bugs is a pretty cute nickname." She smiles. Looks down for a second.
"Oh, you like it now?" I grin.
"Yes, I do. It's unique. Like me."
"Yes. Like you." Cup her face with my hand.
*
"Come on darling." Rose says to her daughter as she helps her out of the hospital bed.
I walk over to take the other side of Harmony even though I'm on crutches. Together and very slowly we manage to get Harms into her wheelchair.
She sits down in it, looks at it and then frowns up at me.
"What?" I question her.
"Bit...bland isn't it?" Honestly the most high maintenance girl to exist. I don't know what she was expecting.
"Was it meant to have hearts all over it?" I joke
"Don't be silly." She scowls at me. Unimpressed with my joke.
"Could be like..pink or something at least." She mumbles to herself with a shrug.
"I'll get some stickers and we can decorate it." I grin and she looks at me shocked that I heard her.
"You're not funny." Points a warning finger at me.
"I'm hilarious." I counter.
She rolls her eyes at me pretending to be more annoyed than she is. So I shuffle over, plant a kiss on her cheek and she immediately starts smiling.
Rose finishes grabbing the last of Harmony's stuff, and then we all leave the hospital room together.
Quite a funny little sight. Me on crutches, Harmony in a wheelchair.
If you told past me this is where I'd end up, I'd be shocked.
"Just going to sign you out." Rose tells her daughter as she wheels her wheelchair to the side where the guest seats are. I go to stand where she is, take a seat on one of the chairs because my legs are tired.
"Do I look cute in my wheelchair?" Harmony asks me.
"The cutest." I reply with a soft smile.
She beams as she looks away. Happy to have my approval. As if she'd ever need that to believe she's an angel. Everyone tells her. No ones out there denying that she has the best face in the world.
I take her hand in mine because I feel like it. Give it a little squeeze. She smiles adoringly at me. Gazes into my eyes.
I gaze back into hers. Get lost in them really.
Takes me a while to snap out of it and notice her smiles faded but when I do I look at her worriedly. Notice her eyes are looking at something behind me. So I turn to meet her eye-line and that's when I see what she sees.
"For god sake." I groan.
"OH! MY!" The most annoying voice gasps
"MY GOD!" The second most annoying voice yells.
"Olive! Jordan!" Giana squeals rushing over to us as Matt trails behind.
I look to Harmony.
"How the fuck are they here? How?"
"I have no fucking clue!" She sighs.
"Oh my goodness! Olive!" Giana scurries over to the other side of Harmony. Grabs her face and holds it in her hands which Harmony hates and I can tell if she didn't have a broken arm, she would of hit or pushed Giana by now.
"Jordan! What happened!" Matt weirdly bends down in front of me, examining me.
"Nothing." I say through gritted teeth
"Olive? What the heck happened to you?" Giana asks
"Oh you know..car crash." Harmony shrugs.
"Oh dear!" Giana sighs dramatically bringing a hand to her head.
"Was you in it too Jords?" Matt questions.
"No. Football injury." I reply
"Oh that's right...because you're...Jude Bellingham." He whispers the last part as to keep the secrecy.
I roll my eyes.
"You poor things!" Giana tuts. Rubbing harmony's arm.
"Why are you two here then?" Harms questions
Giana pushes some hair behind her ear.
"Well as you know we're on our word tour. We decided to stop back home in London because...." She pauses, looks over to Matt who's grinning.
"Oh sod it! We're pregnant!" She yells out way too loudly for a hospital setting but as everyone is aware she has no social awareness whatsoever.
"Oh...wow." Harmony raises her eyebrows in shock.
"Finally put a baby in this gorgeous girl." Matt beams away and then bites his lip as he winks at Giana which is making my breakfast want to come back up.
"Congrats." I say deadpan because I'm over these two.
"Thanks man!" He pats my shoulder.
"We're here for a baby check up! About 25 weeks now." Giana smiles widely.
"That's lovely!" Harmony says genuinely because she's the sweetest person on the planet. Much better than me.
"You two looking to get busy soon and pop out a little one?" Matt raises an eyebrow looking between harmony and I.
Harmony lets out the loudest cough.
"Sorry?" She asks
"Matt they've both had terrible accidents!" Giana scolds.
He looks at Harmony and I apologetically.
Giana rolls her eyes and then looks at Harmony with the biggest smile I'm sure it hurts.
"So...you two are here together. Is romance back in the air?" She wiggles her eyebrows.
Harmony looks at me and tries not to smile too much. Fails and fairs to her because I'm smiling like I've just won a million pounds. Which I have.
"Yeah. It is." I answer because I want everyone to know that I've got my girl back. Even Giana and Matt.
"Oh I'm so glad!" She hugs harmony and Matt hugs me but I push him off.
"Now you two can be godparents to our little one." Giana touches her stomach and smiles.
"God what?" I ask
"Sorry what?" Harmony says at the same time.
"Godparents! We want you to look after our little one in case we die a tragic death." Giana smiles as if what she's asking is the same as asking if I want some water.
"Oh? Um...." Harmony looks at me.
"We can discuss that all later! Anyways we have to go! If you two need anything and we mean absolutely anything text us." Giana stands to her feet as does Matt.
"We don't have your numbers?" I say confused
"Yes you do silly! Slipped it into your phone the second time we saw each other." Matt smiles
Harmony and I exchange a look.
"Okay! Bye." Giana blows us a kiss and then takes Matt's hand. Matt waves and then the pair walk off.
Harms and I are left absolutely speechless.
"We need to block them." She states
"Immediately." I nod.
"They're so..."
"I know!" I say cutting her off.
"At least they didn't walk away arguing this time." She laughs.
"True!" I reply watching as her mum returns.
"All done, let's go." She takes hold of Harmony's wheelchair and I stand to my feet with my crutches and then the three of us make our way out. Closing our worst chapter yet and thankfully leaving it behind us.
"Can't wait to be in my bed!" Harmony sighs as we get into the car.
Rose and I exchange a look.
Been planning some stuff since I was discharged from the hospital. Making a plan for when Harms gets out of the hospital. Rose agreed, once I reassured her she'd be able to see Harmony all the time and we'd have the best of the best where we are.
I turn back to look at the love of my life, smile at her. She smiles back.
It's about a half an hour drive to my house.
Rose helps me out and mum and dad come out to help me once I am. And then dad goes over to help Rose get Harmony out and into her wheelchair.
Rose pushes her towards me and I bend down slowly so I'm level with her face. Ignoring the bit of pain my backs in because she's worth it.
"Gonna miss you." She frowns.
"I'm not." I shrug cooly.
"What!" She furrows her eyebrows, confused.
"You're not going to miss me?" Tilts her head.
"Nah." Shake my head. Look over at our families and grin at them because they know why I'm saying what I am but she doesn't.
"That's incredibly rude Jude Bellingham, and now I've just decided that today I don't like you very much!" She turns her head away from me, glaring at the car.
"Still love me though?" I question.
She turns back to look at me, taken aback a bit by that question but still trying to hold up her resolve.
"Well obviously." She rolls her pretty eyes.
"Good to hear." I grin
Rolls her eyes again and looks away so I gently grab her chin and turn her face back in my direction.
"Do you know how utterly rude it is you saying you won't miss me? Do you understand that?"
"Yeah. I do." Watch as she looks even more angry.
"You're mean! Very very mean!" She points a finger at me.
I grab her hand instead and hold it in mine.
"Mum can we go home now? Jude's being incredibly insulting!" She glares at me before she looks at her mum.
"Why, because I said I won't miss you? I won't. Why would I?" She's going to flip and I love it because winding her up is sort of my favourite thing. She's so cute when she's annoyed or angry.
"Why would you? Are you a fucking idiot?" She snaps and I try and not laugh because again, she's funny even when she doesn't mean to be.
"Because you're not going to see me for like maybe ages!" She continues.
"Says who? I'll see you everyday." I shrug
"Well no that's not possible. You'll have things to do you can't see me every single day." She argues
"Bit impossible to not see you everyday if we live together." I grin.
"But we don't fucking live together!" She snaps and I don't reply I give her a minute. Wait for her to get it. She doesn't for a couple seconds. Looks at me angrily. And then she sees my grin grow and me glance back to our parents. So she looks at them and her mums grins and then so does my mum and dad and then she looks back at me and gets it.
Her face lights up with a mixture of shock, surprise and excitement.
"Jude..."
"Harmony.." I grin
"Don't take the piss with me! Is this what I think this is?" She asks carefully
"If it's me basically making you move in with me then yes. That is what it is." I smile.
She still looks skeptical so I cup her face and look at her seriously, letting the jokes go.
"Thought I lost you in that accident. That killed me. Learnt during that time that I hate being apart from you. Doesn't make sense to me. Feels unfamiliar and weird. Unnatural even."
"So, the minute I was discharged, I thought about you moving in here with me. Mums already sorted out all of my care for my injury, I was sure I'd be able to do the same for you here."
"So I spoke to your mum, asked if it was okay if you recovered here. That I'd pay for the best care for you so you can get back on your feet. That she can come and visit whenever. Even offered her a room."
Harmony looks to her mum and smiles. Tears brimming her eyes.
"The house is big enough for all of us. It has like eight rooms." I laugh. Very big house to be honest.
"She politely declined but she thought you'd love to be here. That you'd be happy here."
"Mum and dad were obviously okay with you staying here you're part of the family. Have been since you walked into my life all those years back." Mum and dad still don't know our initial relationship was fake. Probably will tell them one day.
"So now, I just need your answer." Look at her hopefully.
She sniffs, blinking her tears away.
"You were quite rude before with your little joke."
"You know I didn't mean it harms." I sniff a laugh.
She rolls her eyes with a smile.
"So?" I question
She looks at our parents and then back at me.
"Are you fucking mad? Of course I'll stay here." She laughs.
Something else she is.
"You're so difficult sometimes." I laugh kissing her cheek and then I straighten up because my back hurts.
"And you're an arse sometimes." She retorts.
I roll my eyes with a smile. Nod my head towards the house. "Come on, let's go."
Rose walks to her daughter and begins to wheel her in. Mum, dad and I following after.
Group effort but they manage to get Harmony upstairs to my room to let her lay down.
Mum invites rose to stay for dinner which she accepts so they all go downstairs to sit in the living room and chat, letting Harmony and I have some time alone.
"Finally got you back in my bed." I grin as I shuffle closer to Harmony.
"Mhm, seemingly so." She smiles at me.
"I love you." Push her hair behind her ear.
"I love you too." She beams. Leans in and I kiss her gently on the lips and then on her forehead. She rests her head on my chest how I love.
"You already put all my stuff in here." She notes looks around the room to see two of her plants and her stuff hanging in the open wardrobe.
"Yeah." I laugh
"But how did you know I'd say yes?" Looks up at me
"Oh I didn't. You moving in here wasn't really a choice it was always happening." I laugh and she breaks into a big smile shaking her head.
"You're insane." Rests her head back on my chest.
"And you're home." I counter smartly, kissing the side of her head.
— domestic Jarmony!
domestic Jarmony!!!!