"Are there crabs in Plant?"
What difference does it make to play a role as long as I can live like that?
It's a question that life would end up answering for me later.
But when you feel lost and expelled from the world that was once yours, you cling to whatever gives you stability and even more so if it comes from the unconditional love that you never had and appeared in your life to rescue you.
That's how I got to Orb. Under Alex Dino's sunglasses and swearing allegiance to Cagalli.
Everything seemed so different, as if the air I breathed on Earth was purer than any other I had ever taken into my lungs before. Maybe the sense of relief I felt knowing that I could leave the torments behind accompanied by the need to continue living made it seem that way to me.
Although it still felt strange, leaving behind everything that I really was...
The new identification number that had been assigned to me bounced around in my mind as I memorized it, after all, even though I was now a civilian, being on duty as the companion of the representative of the nation demanded of me the mental health that a good memory could give me.
I think the first days were difficult in adapting to the new identity, but little by little the familiarity of what was now enveloped everything, even more so that afternoon when we were finally able to be alone.
I opened the door to my room knowing that I was going to find you at the entrance, but insecurity kept me imprisoned.
I understood that I had fallen in love with a princess and that when her father died, the weight of the emirates would logically fall on her, but it was much harder than I thought.
-It has been a perfect escape.
You removed your jacket in response to my unspoken request that you give it to me.
- Are you sure you can be here?
I asked, not really convinced. Maybe I had lost a little hope of being with you normally.
- What?
The confusion you expressed perplexed me, I didn't want to be the cause of you having more things to think about.
-I'm sorry, I expressed myself wrong...
-Athrun... I know that this is very far from being able to be something more intimate and it may not be at all what one would expect to be able to live closer, but...
-I'm sorry...
- Don't keep apologizing!
- I have to do it! Just listen to me... I'm sorry, because I didn't want it to sound like a reproach. If I asked... it was because what I want most is to be able to stay with you... being me, it will sound very capricious, but I'm afraid that you'll have to run away at any moment.
I couldn't hold your gaze and ended up looking away, you make words escape me easily. Even more so in these moments when I can't do anything to protect you.
-For me you are still you... nothing has changed and I am not going to leave...
I couldn't answer, we both knew that the answer you gave me wasn't one hundred percent true.
-Come in, please.
I invited you to settle in and the way you settled in was quick, when I noticed you were on the sofa with your arms extended towards me. It seemed too cute to me.
I arrived next to you and sat listening to what you wanted to say, but you just leaned your head on my shoulder while hugging my arm.
-It is very difficult to endure not doing this at work...
-Tell it to me... I feel like at any moment I'm going to get a "Cagalli", Miss Representative...
- Don't you want to continue working with me?...
You detached yourself from my shoulder and looked at me as if the answer I gave would be crucial.
-At no time have I said or tried to insinuate that...
-Sometimes, I would like to have a driving instruction book.
- Driving?
-That's how it is
-But you are very good at using the Mobile Suit.
Laughter overflowed from your lips, making me understand that I had not understood anything we talked about the last moment.
-Management of the boyfriend...
You whispered so softly that I barely heard you, but listening to you I couldn't help but feel my heart skip a beat, because that boyfriend you were talking about was me and I was going to humor you, after all, our talks become very enjoyable when you get into that mood. .
-So you want to manage me like a Mobile Suit...
- At least I know what to expect from them...!
-Well, if we go to that... I'll be Strike Rouge.
- Eh?... I would have imagined that you would choose something more imposing like the Akatsuki.
Intrigue dominated you and you placed your small hand on my chest while you looked at me interested.
-It's true that I like gold...
I answered with complete honesty, at some point in my mind we went from talking about the Gundam to something that caught me more at that moment.
I couldn't stop looking into your eyes and finding the most beautiful color in them.
-Athrun...
I couldn't resist it. The impulse dominated me instantly, I needed so much to be able to hug you and fill myself with your smell that I think I even breathed your neck when I brought you closer to my chest. This is exactly what I meant when I told you that it was so hard to be by your side all day without being able to move a muscle to truly be with you.
But it was something I couldn't do like Athrun Zala or Alex Dino.
It was as if for a moment I had vanished from reality at this thought, but your hands on my back brought me back to you in a soft caress on the fabric.
-I'm here now... these are the moments that we must take advantage of until the last second...
You intertwined the fingers of your hand with mine; I knew what you had meant and I counted on your full availability, but it still felt clandestine. Then I understood that that would be me from then on...
A lover in the shadows. Dedicated to you in every way and... I didn't dislike the idea.
I took you by the neck carefully and I could feel how you placed your trust in me.
-Athrun...
Your voice was heard like a delicate murmur between my arms, I wanted more of that... it was the first time I heard you like that.
-Tell me...
-I'm curious...
-You can ask whatever you like, if I can help you you know I will.
-It's just... that you seem so special to me, but so much... that I just want to know everything about you, see everything about you... and what I'm saying seems so intimate to me that it makes me ashamed, but despite that... I'm able to tell you. to you...
The beautiful blush that took over your vanilla skin completely conquered me.
-I'm here for you, Cagalli...
-You tell me that and this feeling inside me becomes bigger.
-I know what you're talking about... when you started the topic... I thought about waiting to calm my own feelings, but it makes me very happy that you feel that trust with me.
- What do you want us to do?...
-Well... you were the one who said you were curious...
-Then you said that you had it too...
-And I have it... a lot!
I responded almost automatically, I didn't want you to stop.
-Then... let me...
Your hands trembled while waiting in the midst of anxiety and your crestfallen face robbed me of everything I really needed to see. Your nervous expression and aggrieved blush.
-Kiss me, Cagalli...
I spoke to you with the firm conviction of detonating what you felt but seemed to repress with the last of your feelings of modesty.
-I have to do it... because I started this and I have to take responsibility... since I'm older...
-It's true... you must take responsibility...
I offered you my conciliatory smile to give you the confidence you were looking for. I could barely stop my desire to be the one to snatch the kiss from you, but it was incredibly beautiful to see you approach seeking my contact.
It was the first time that I felt desired, in the sense of a woman looking for my company and that it was precisely you who did it clouded my thoughts.
You were serious, your curiosity marked the exploration of your hands on my body.
And it was the first time someone had taken me down so ridiculously easy, I couldn't resist feeling your weight fall on my chest, while your lips sought an answer from mine.
You trapped me between the sofa and your being.
It was a delight to feel your small body seeking accommodation in the midst of the distribution of kisses and caresses that was unleashed.
It was evident that the desires of both were being released little by little and what had started as an exploration out of curiosity could end in something more.
Your kisses traveled along my neck in a sublime journey that ended on my right collarbone when I lost the first two buttons of my shirt and exposed the pendant that protects me to this day.
-Cag...
You caught me in a breath with the initial of your name.
- It's too much?...
Your question dragged me to reality in one fell swoop, you were there on top of me without daring to look at me. Of course it wasn't...
-Not at all... Cagalli, one of the things I love about you is how when you make a decision, no matter how challenging it may seem, you try to make it happen... although sometimes...
Your gaze seemed like glass while you listened to me.
-Although sometimes... you need a little push.
I couldn't help it, I needed to continue feeling you and I wasn't going to let you retract your own ambitions.
And in one movement I turned you under me.
-Athrun... what... agility.
The hot flush on your cheeks was inexplicably alluring.
-I am a soldier, Cagalli...
-I don't forget, it's not the first time you've made me fly in the air and that's how it should be...
-It was a good remembrance of the day we met. There is so much from that day that I could bring to mind today... right now.
- Like what?... Having seen you without a shirt for example?...
-Clear
I accepted when I saw you placing your hands on me again, the buttons began to come off.
-Or... an adorable hiking crab.
- Crab? Hey, the question was serious, there are no crabs in PLANT?
-There are, but I will say that the crab I'm talking about was something special.
I snuggled up to you as lightly as I could so as not to crush you and this time I was the one who initiated the kiss, while I fulfilled my fantasy of being that crab with so much luck and was able to touch your delicate skin under the garment.
By those moments I had already lost myself in the need for my complete being to lie next to you and while your sweet hands outlined my muscles at their touch, my head traveled in the world of pleasing my base instincts and taking ownership of your breasts that since They always called me to be arrested.
It was the most delicate sensation I had ever felt and the blush that came furiously to your cheekbones stood out in your shining amber eyes.
You were so fragile... that I felt like I was damned for provoking you that way, but at the same time, I felt the luckiest to be the one who had the privilege of being the one to receive all that from you.
You surrounded my neck with your arms and drew me to you, you caressed my hair and I had no choice but to place the weight of my body on yours, you were going to discover what you had awakened in me, but everything was a product of the moment and I It also belonged to you.
The natural accommodation led me to lie between your legs, while your hand came to rest on what you felt between mine.
-Cagalli... oh, God...
I had nothing left but to thank life for the moment that my whole being was enjoying, but I knew that, if I continued, I was going to lose myself completely, I wanted to be sure that you were okay with this.
- Are you OK?...
-Athrun...
The blush of nervousness and excitement did not allow you to speak and the fact that you were left speechless gave me to understand with great precision that you had fallen prey to the moment like me.
You hugged me again with great vehemence, the last thing you wanted was for me to let go of you and that was clear to me.
But you deserved more than a moment of debauchery on the couch.
I took you in my arms and carrying you like the princess you are, I took you to the room.
I left you sitting on the bed while I knelt before you, waiting to understand that what we were doing was right.
-You shouldn't feel pressured... I know that the emotion of the moment can lead you to feel many things...
-Thank you...
There was no doubt that before me was the most beautiful woman I had ever seen. And you looked at me with so much sweetness and gratitude that I didn't know what to expect. Maybe you had taken a picture of yourself and thanked me for my consideration...
-It doesn't matter...
-Thank you, there is no doubt that you are truly a gentleman... that you are my protection and my love...
-Cagalli...
-But I would be lying if I said I hadn't waited for this... and I'm not going to hide anything from you... I need you... I want to know what it means... to give myself to the man I love...
You carefully crouched over me as you grabbed my face.
And you ended up curled up next to me on the carpet.
It was like the transition between my conscious self and the alienated one that would only seek to please you in what you had just asked of me.
Starting everything again with that kiss that laid you against the bed while still sitting on the carpet.
That night I understood what it meant to make love and to be made to feel love.
In reality, it mattered little in those moments who I was or what my name was, it was nothing more than a heart in love expressing itself fully.
.
.
.
Author's note
I haven't written a scene like this in so long. That I would love to be able to write their encounter in full.