The sun shining through the huge glass windows make their way inside the laboratory room, lightening up the gloomy atmosphere of the surrounding. As Hongjoong twirls the contents he mixed into a test tube, his eyes concentrate on the slightest reaction or changes that occur in it. His other hand is holding a pen at the same time, writing down a report that he needs to submit by the end of the day to the president. He let out a sigh as he saw little to no effect on the contents, before finally putting it away in the test tube rack.
These past few days have been extremely confusing for him, and that he realises he needs something to wind down the thoughts that had been occupying his mind. Hongjoong used to find solace and peace whenever he was working in the lab, to the point he spent countless hours trying to figure out other chemical alterations that he has not yet discovered, but now everything becomes weirdly difficult.
His attention span turns shorter as the day goes by and much to his own surprise, he found himself waiting for the clock to reach 1700 hours, the time Seonghwa had told him to clock out. He never really leaves the lab unless he's way too exhausted, but now all he wants is to leave and get back to his little room the president had provided that he called home.
Hongjoong shakes his head, before realising it's already time for him to leave, and quickly moves to empty the test tubes he used and wash it as fast as he could. He then tears off the mask and gloves he was wearing and dumps it into the specialised bin and walks to his locker, before taking off his white lab coat and putting it away inside. His arm reaches for his backpack and he quickly scans his identification card on the scanner, finally making it outside.
His initial intention to get back to his room is suddenly forgotten when Hongjoong turns on the opposite hallway. Hongjoong walks thoroughly while his eyes wander around, fearing as if somebody is watching him.
Though he knows either the president or the other VESTRA board members are watching any of his moves anyway. At least, as much as he doesn't want to admit it, he's a bit relieved that Seonghwa had decided to include Saera into the trial. For now, he doesn't have to worry about her, and the things that she is capable of. Hongjoong bites his lips, just the thought of her is making him uncomfortable.
For no apparent reason.
It is true, what she had said to him the other day. He doesn't have any reason to fear Saera for who she is. She is an employer, just like him and she works for VESTRA, also just like him. It is true that she never had anything to do with him, but for unknown reasons, his mind keeps on telling him there's something else going on with her. There is something that he should not interfere with, and somehow it all correlates with her existence here in VESTRA.
Hongjoong too doesn't seem to understand it, as all of these ideas that developed a feeling of fear and resentment towards Saera all came from dreams he has been having ever since. He tries to find motives in the dreams that he had, but no matter what he did, he never found any of his questions answered. He admits that sometimes he does feel a bit of guilt towards her, but he couldn't just push away what he has been feeling.
It is scary. It's a fear he couldn't overcome. A fear that turns into something else that he can't control.
Dreams. That's what has been giving him the ability to express emotions. His dreams were the ones who made him who he is today and truthfully, the thought of it was as stupid as it sounds. It felt like he was living in his dreams and not the reality. As if two worlds are colliding in his mind and he does not know which one is real. But, no matter how ridiculous it sounds, these dreams were the ones which became a source of motivation for him to continue on living.
The dreams itself were like a broken record. It keeps on playing every night when he closes his eyes. The same dream which makes him contemplate the reality of his world, the fear he has towards Saera and the source of motivation towards finding a cure of the virus.
Will he ever find the answer to his weird dreams? He doesn't know, but as long as he lives, he's sure that he can never get it off his head. It's engraved in his mind, on how vividly those dreams have affected him. It gives him a personality that he has never been proud of. Will he ever tell anyone about it? He too doesn't know, because the fear of someone knowing all his secrets is still one of the fears he has not yet overcome, just like his unknown fear towards Saera.
Hongjoong finds himself standing in front of a door. There is nothing special with this particular room, but only certain people know how many secrets are kept beneath this door. He turns to look around, before quickly scanning his card and punching in the special code. The scanner blinks into a green colour, as the door finally opens.
He takes a step inside and closes the door behind him. His eyes rummaging through the screens right in front him, and the sudden urge to turn back creeps into him. He immediately shoves the thoughts away and gathers a bit of courage to walk closer to the screens, taking in the information displayed on it.
The screen only displays a logo, which is the VESTRA symbol. Three droplets of water. A snicker plays on his lips as he takes a seat in front of the monitors and clicks on a button on his right. Within a second, the screens converge into a one large screen, and it displays all of the information regarding all of the past newbies that VESTRA had taken in as their lab rats. These people had no chance to refuse, and little did they know, the end results won't be as pretty as they promised. An antidote injection for a winner? The president surely knows how to play his cards right.
There is no cure, yet. Promising them those things only to get them to do things that they don't consent to. That is what VESTRA has been doing to the young generations. Who have a lot more to their future if only they hadn't taken them in. Who might have chance to survive the viruses on their own, who knows?
Hongjoong sighs, feeling a bit of guilt wrapping around his heart, knowing he's been part of this experiment too. He tries to soothe the nerves by telling himself he's only doing this for the sake of saving humanity. That it was necessary to take in these innocent people for them to experiment on in order to find a cure that they probably never find.
More guilt finds its way to his heart.
He clicks on a file and finds the document he has been meaning to find. It's the particular group Seonghwa had mentioned, the one that he said would probably be the key answer to the cure. Hongjoong squints his eyes through the glasses he's wearing, reading the names listed in the particular file.
"Song Mingi, Jung Wooyoung, Song Elenna."
The names were listed in blue colour. He clicks on the next document. Another list of names appears.
"Kang Yeosang, Choi San, Nam Arin."
Contrasting to the first document, this time the list names were listed in red colour. He clicks on the last document. Only one name appears.
"Choi Jongho.."
His eyebrows furrow, and it takes him a while to figure out the system listings. The blue ones are the newbies, the red ones are the mentors...
Hongjoong squints his eyes again.
"Choi Jongho doesn't have any colour."
He tries to think of something, but doesn't seem to come up with anything. He knows Jongho doesn't have a mentor, but why is that? Hongjoong had asked the president when he instructed him to bring Saera to the group, but the president merely ignored him. A hint of curiosity devised in him.
Hongjoong shakes his head as he feels the usual anxiousness hitting him but as he is about to close the file and forget about all of the curiosity building in him, he sees another document in the same file. An unnamed one. He contemplates with himself whether or not to open it but he finally decides to shake off his anxiety and straightly click on the particular document.
His breath stops as he reads the list of names that appear in front of him. Hongjoong tries to blink and rub his eyes but the names are still there and he can confirm that he's not hallucinating things. He scrolls the screen with the cursor as his heartbeat increases within time, and he swears he feels like running away at this exact moment.
"Park Seonghwa.. Kim Hongjoong.. Ko Saera.. Jeong Yunho..?"
These are all the people who work for VESTRA! Hongjoong bites his lips, not realising he has been tapping his foot on the ground a bit too fast. He glances at the screen again, staring longer than he intended to as he saw his own name again. It's hard to believe what he is seeing, to the point he contemplates whether the thing he is doing now is merely just a fraction of his dream again.
He slaps his right cheek slightly, and he can confirm it isn't just an illusion he can ignore like he used to. Considering how far he went to this extent, he can feel this isn't just some usual file. Why in the world would it contain the names of people who work for VESTRA? Including the president?
True it's nothing new with the newbie and mentor names being in a separate document, but to have the president's own name in a particular file of a group? That is way too unusual for him to just ignore. He thinks for a while, what he wants to do with the information he discovered, what will be his next move now.
Hongjoong feels a sense of determination kicked in him as he takes out a pendrive and inserts it. His hand moves fast to click on the file and download the whole thing into his own pendrive. He taps his foot hurriedly on the floor as he waits for the file to download and as soon as the download completes, he grabs the pendrive off and slides it into his pocket.
A lot of questions appear in his mind as he scans his card on the scanner again. All questions that he determines to find ways to get it answered. If before this he used to push away all of the weird and questionable things VESTRA had made him do, now he finally has the chance to find answers to his questions all this while.
He grabs the door handle and stops for a second, scanning the room one last time.
I wonder if the president knows about this file.
Hongjoong pulls the door open, a gust of wind greeting his face.
He will find out what lies behind this particular file. That, a promise he is making to himself.
As he takes a step outside from the room, he finally feels another part of him coming back to reality. As if he finally finds something that makes him have a clear vision for what he wants and needs to accomplish. Not just being a man who locks himself in the laboratory, but being someone who actually has a real goal, a determination to prove himself useful to the real world out there.
A goal and a motivation, at last.