Hello all! Would you mind following me on my new instagram account?
I want to have more communication with all of you and hope to be more closer, so that's why I started
And I also hope that I'll find some Once friends as well!
Please support me if you can! But thanks for being here as well
Long chapter ~
Gia had to admit, she's feeling drained for the past month.
And with having a come back after a year with With YOU-th, it is very stressful.
Not yet counting the concerts they have been held around the world for the year, it could be very tired.
Being an idol is enough pressure to the girl, but as one of the main producers Twice's, or even JYPE.
Well, it only makes it worst.
Gia actually was one of the main writers of all the 6 songs of this album.
Even the professionals prised about Gia's talent in producing music, she is sometimes still not confident over at her creation.
However, they still manage to convince her to write in every single song in this album.
When there's praises, there's got to be pain behind as well.
After she submitted the ideas and her work, the maknae worries a lot about if the songs are good enough for the group.
She doesn't want to ruin Twice's imagine.
This is not just only about her own solo album, it's about her whole group.
Not saying it in a self centered way, but Twice's 13th mini album depends on her.
So it had been pretty rough for Gia, with all the stress and daily things she need to do for work, not yet counting the lack of sleep she's getting.
And it didn't surprise the members when they saw how tired their maknae look under her make up.
But these are stuff fans never need to know.
The girls still worries about her a lot though.
During One Spark promotion, it is the time when Gia finally burst open, couldn't hold it any more inside.
Especially the time when One Spark is waiting for their music show wins. Jeongyeon and Mina, who stood beside her at the most edge side amount the group, the two times when they are about to announce the winner.
The moment they announce that they didn't win, both of them could feel how hard Gia squeezed her own clothes in her fist, which the two wrapped their arms around her figure, and trying to act normal in front of the fans.
It was the second once she got to the backstage, it is when she finally let her tears flow down her cheeks.
It breaks the girls heart seeing their baby like that.
But the first priority is to bring her back home - back to safety first.
So during their way and their trip back to the dorm, the girls didn't ask much about what happen, just trying to calm her emotions.
It is rare to see her cry in front of them, even for all the years after their debut.
Unless it's something effecting her a lot, or to the point she couldn't hold it, then when the girls took one more step into her to comfort her, she will break down at instant.
When the girls arrived at the dorm, sending the youngest one safely back into her room, the 9 Unnies gathered around in the living room for what Jihyo called it - a meeting.
"Come on, let's talk about Meong now," Jeongyeon started with a sigh.
"I felt really bad for her," Tzuyu said with a small pout, "She worked so hard for this."
Momo smiled weakly, "I guessed she's very disappointed at the results with the amount of hard work she put in." The girls nod in agreement.
"We could hear her crying at night," Chaeyoung said, "Her sniffings are loud."
"She must be under a lot of pressure, I heard that the company is asking her to write a lot, for not only us but other groups as well." Dahyun said.
The oldest said, being serious about it, not like her usual cutesy playful tone anymore, "We admit that our maknae is very talented, but it's too much, and it's about creativity, I don't think she could write any more if she's always this overwhelmed.
"But I think we should still go in and ask for the details," Mina suggested, "You think she will be alright to talk now?"
Jihyo nod her head softly, before getting up from her place, and head up the stairs along with Mina, then Sana followed along behind as well.
Jihyo knocked on the door softly, and the middle kid trio walked quietly outside for the kid's response.
"Unnie, I love you so much, but leave me alone. Just let me be alone for a few hours -"
"Meong," Mina called out softly, "It's us only, Sana, Jihyo, and Mina, can we come in?"
There were nothing coming out from the room except for silence for the next few minutes, but before Jihyo speaks up, Gia cut her off, "Okay, the door isn't lock."
When the three of them opened the door, they quickly sees that the youngest girl is not on her bed, or next to her desk. Instead, she just sat there on the floor, with her back leaned against the wall.
The three Unnies quietly went around her, and Sana quickly wrapped her arms around hers, which the tears are still falling down onto Sana's shirt, but she couldn't care more but their kid at that moment.
"Hum? What's wrong, Gia?" Jihyo gently caressed the youngest's back.
But seeing her lips didn't part to answer, Sana said, "We know that you are worried, right? You are scared that Twice wouldn't get loved because they don't like the songs you made?"
Even the two girls at the side could see Gia's figure shakes from Sana's words, so she just hugs her even more tightly.
"So, what's wrong? Can you tell your Unnies?" Mina ask softly, sending a soft peek of lips on top of the girl's forehead, and she open her puffed eyes from all the crying.
Gia thought about it hard. Should she let her Unnies go into her heart?
Well, it did felt a lot better after telling her problems to them before.
And it would be unfair for them that the maknae is keeping secrets from them. And they also deserves an explanation.
Gia back up to get away from Sana's arms, she looked at the 3 older girls in front of her.
Sana smiled bitterly over seeing Gia in this state, but she put a hand in her soft hair and ruffles it softly. Jihyo hold her arm in comfort of telling her to relax and to tell her that they are listening right beside her. While Mina cupped the kid's cheeks and wiped away the tears
"I am really disappointed at myself," Gia confessed, once she started, she instantly hang her head low to avoid having eye contact with any of the girls.
"This is your album -! I am very scared that I would ruin this EP." the girls around look instantly over at the youngest one as she continues.
"And I could have done more, I could have work harder, I could have learn more ahead of time so I won't be falling behind and, -"
Jihyo sudden pointed a finger into Gia's soft cheeks.
"Hyo -?"
"- stop it Kiddo." She said calmly, "You are telling yourself the opposite thing."
"No, Jihyo," Gia roll her eyes softly, however the fact that they could still see blinks of tears hidden in her eyes, "I'm not dumb, I see what people comment about this album, they said that it's not enough, it's bad for as a Twice album and the songs should sound better - They hated me, I'm useless."
"Hey!" Sana said in a playful scold tone, but eyebrows are cling together anxiously, "Don't say that, you are never useless. You did a lot but you just didn't realised."
"Babe," Mina tried to give out a warm look to convince the kid, "The songs sound amazing, you are the one who compose it to make each of the member's voice stands out. You did it so perfectly."
From seeing the girls around her smiled, she couldn't help but to squeezed out a weak one.
"Ignore what the world said, you should care more for yourself as well, did you notice how much did you eat each day for the past few weeks? We might didn't say anything but we know, Gia." Jihyo added, "You basically only eat a fruit or a bread something like that for one meal, you are torturing yourself, kid."
Mina smiled warmly, "You did wonderful, babe. They might not see it, but we all did. The members did, the company did, your family did, and Once did as well, they will appreciate all of them. I believe that they want you to have a break to yourself, right?"
Gia nods like a kindergarten kid, looks like she just got scolded by a few teachers of hers because of not washing her hands after going to the bathroom.
It might be the wrong timing, but she's so cute looking like this.
"You really thing so?" Gia sniffled softly, looking up at the three Unnie's hopeful eyes.
"Of course," the leader smiled, "And we, Once are so proud of you."
"Come here Kitten," Sana pulled the maknae into her embrace again, which Jihyo and Mina both joined in together.
"You girls always know what to do to cheer me up."
"Gia, you are the kind of people who gets effected by small words, so we know your huge emotion roller coasters." Jihyo smiled softly.
After a few good ten minutes, before any one of them tries to pull out, Gia's arms got tighten around them.
"Please, don't go yet.
stay with me - just a little longer."
The three girls couldn't help but to chuckle over at the kid, comparing to other members she rarely shows affection to any of the girls.
So they just grins even more widely and hug her tight.
Sana playfully joked, "Huh, so what is this sudden clingy-ness from you, Gia-ssi?"
"Stop it Sana-chan," She smiles, "Just enjoy it."
"We love you so much, don't forget that."
"I won't, I promise."
I feel like how I wrote this is a little personal, since I often though of Gia as a songwriter in the group, when now I thought about it writing title tracks seems to be a little too much, sorry about that
You all are probably in an emotional roller coaster with me as I keep switching between angst - fluff - angst - fluff
But to me this is a very healing chapter, hope you are all doing well in your days, best of luck and I will always support you!
<3