Well, today is May 28... is the big day...Graduation! I am both excited and sad about it. Excited because obviously Cassadie, Cersie and I are all finally graduating. We have been talking about this day for months. I am also sad because Kylie isn't here with me. We both (along with Cassadie) were very excited. I honestly planned on kissing her when we threw our graduation caps in the air as if saying we are ready for the world together. I know it's cheesy right? I just hope wherever she is that she is happy... even without me by her side. Also I hope that she knows that she is always on my mind, I miss and love her very much.
Our graduation event is happening on our football field a few hours after we leave. Because I am the student body president I know that they are going to set up a stage, microphone stand, a number of chairs (about 10 for the principal, vice-principal, other important people in the school board, the valedictorian ect.) and a projection screen. Across the stage will be around 300 chairs for the graduating class. All of our families are going to be sitting in the bleachers.
Right now Cassadie Cersie and I are currently walking home. I can't help but smile and laugh with them as we all talk about graduating. Every now and again though I can't help but grab my star charm with a sad smile as a tear rolls down my left cheek. I thought to myself, 'I wish you were here with us baby. We should all be getting ready to graduate together like we always talked about. I love and miss you so much.'
As I was lost in my thoughts thinking about Kylie I felt a hand intertwined with mine. I looked down and gave a small smile. I followed it up to see Cassadie with a sad smile on her face. Even without me doing or telling her anything she knows what I am thinking about.
She gives me a sad smile and says, "I know you miss her. I do too. I also wish she was here to graduate with us like we always talked about."
She gave me another smile and said, "Good because I refuse for you to be sad on our graduation day. It just won't be right. All the pictures will be sad and it's supposed to be only happy memories today."
I wiped the stray tear coming down my left cheek and gave her a huge smile back and said, "Yes you are right. I will make sure not to make the pictures sad ones."
We both looked at Cersie and she looked at both of us confused. I gave a smile and said, "I'm ok. Just a memory of my girl..." I swallowed hard. I thought to myself, 'Calling you this will never be easy. I just wish I didn't have to my love.' A tear ran down my left cheek again. I wiped it away slowly. I looked back at Cersie and said, "... my ex-girlfriend came to mind and it made me sad. We were supposed to graduate together but she moved away last year and it's just hitting a little harder than I was expecting it too."
She nodded her head in understanding.
I shook my head with a smile with tears in my eyes and said, "Anyways like Cassadie said today is supposed to be a happy day so that's what we are going to have!"
****
We all decided to meet up at 7 p.m. since it started at 8 p.m. When we finally made it home I had some hours to relax and think. Around 5 p.m. I took a shower and prepared everything for tonight. I put on the dress I found the day we all went to the mall. I paired it with black and white checkerboard uppers with sunflower 🌻 prints, dual hook-and-loop yellow laces with yellow ankle socks. I decided to leave my hair down and curled it a bit but on the right side at the end of it I put in a yellow bow that had small sunflowers printed all over it
After I was done. I put on the graduation gown. It was plain black and went all the way past my knees. I zipped up the gown all the way and you couldn't even tell what I was wearing underneath it. On my shoulders was a golden shawl that matched our school colors. The graduation cap was also plain black but had a golden ribbon that went around the cap. I tried on the graduation cap and it went perfectly over my cat ears. I smiled at myself in the mirror. I grabbed my star charm and had a sad smile on my face.
I took off the graduation gown and walked to the living room and sat on the couch. I still had about a half an hour before we had to leave. I was watching TV when I saw Cassadie walking in the living room with her graduation cap and gown in her hands. She was wearing a black tuxedo-like jacket with a collar that is open to reveal a white shirt underneath it the sleeves rolled up to the base of her elbows, wearing black skinny jeans with white braided belt. Her shoes were brown boots that go up half the calf with matching belt on the base of the boot and the very top of it. She had her shoulder-length pink hair in pigtails
I smiled at her and said, "I love your outfit."
She smiled back and said, "Thank you. I love your outfit also."
Both of your parents came up to us with smiles on their faces. Our mother hugged us and said, "Both of you girls look so beautiful tonight. I love both of your outfits."
My father came up behind her and said, "Your mother is right, both of you look beautiful tonight."
We all pulled away and smiled. Cassadie said, "Thank you so much Mama and Papa! I also can't wait for Cersie to come so we could see her outfit and take pictures."
Both our parents and I chuckled. I decided to tease her a bit and asked, "Are you sure that's the only reason why you want to see her?"
She blushed a light red and practically squeaked out, "What do you mean? Of course that's the only reason."
Both our parents and I laughed at her reaction. I nodded my head and said, "Yeah sure I believe you."
She didn't say anything but her blushed darkend. My father chuckled and said, "Ok Elsie stop teasing your sister and get ready to take a picture with your mother."
I chuckled a little bit longer and nodded my head. I said, "Yes Papa."
For the picture our mother stood in between us. I was on her right side and Cassadie on her left. Cassadie is much taller than our mother and me. I am just a couple inches shorter than our mother. The next picture was just of me and our parents. I stood in the middle. My father on the left and my mother on the right. I am shorter than both of our parents and my father is taller than both me and my mother.
The next picture was Cassadie and our parents. She stood in the middle. Our father on the left and our mother on the right. She is taller than our mother but shorter than our father. We found a way to take a picture of all of us together.
Basically I am the shortest one, then our mother, then Cassadie and then our father.
Right when we were done taking pictures there was a knock on our door. My father walked to the door. He comes back with Cersie. She was wearing a black tank top with decorative holes on the top. A black steampunk fishtail frill layered skirt that goes up just above her knee on the right side you could see her fishnet stockings that goes all the way up. On the left side is a half-open red box pleated skirt with a flower print, a red belt and silver belt buckle. She also has a black leather choker in the form of a belt. Her shoes were black Doc Martens. She left her waist-length hair down and curled with her bangs going to the right side. She had her graduation gown laid on her forearm and cap in her hand
I felt my cheeks heat up a bit. I then looked at Cassadie and her whole face was red and looked like hearts were in her eyes. I chuckled a bit. I told Cersie, "Wow you look amazing! I love your outfit."
She blushed and brought up her hand and scratched the back of her neck and said, "Thank you. I found all of this at one of my favorite shops. I honestly couldn't decide on which piece to wear so I decided to wear all of them. I thought it wouldn't come out good but I guess it came out good?"
Cassadie finally came out of her trance-like state and said, "Yes it came out so good. You look... amazing."
Cersie smiled and said, "Thank you. I also love your outfit. You look amazing."
For a little bit they just stood there just staring at each other. Once again my parents and I chuckled at them too flirting with each other.
Our mother was the one that spoke up and said, "Ok girls you all look beautiful for tonight. Now let me take a picture of you three before we are late."
We all nodded our heads and got in position. I am on the right side, Cassadie on the left side and Cersie is in the middle. I have my right hand on my hip, Cersie's arm is intertwined with mine and Cassadie has her arm around on Cersie's hip.
After taking the (many) pictures we get in the car and head to the school. Cersie said her parents will meet our parents there so they could all sit together. When we got there we had to seperate from our family. We had to go to the gym for a follow-up just to make sure everyone knew what to do.
Before the follow-up started we were all just talking amongst ourselves.
Cassadie explained, "Wow I am so nervous and excited at the same time!"
Cersie nodded her head agreeing with her. She quietly said, "Yes I would have to agree with you. We all have been talking about this day for a long time and it's finally here."
I basically yelled in excitement, "I know right? It is both so exciting and nerve-wracking. I can only imagine how I'm going to be when I walk across that stage to get my diploma. Also I can't wait to see how you guys are going to act either."
It was like something inside had finally clicked in both of their heads. Cassadie looked shocked and said, "Oh, dang I didn't even think about that. Also Elsie..."
I looked at her and asked, "Yes?"
She got quiet then a smirk came to her face. She said, "You do know that you are going to be one of the first ones to get your diploma right?"
I looked at her a bit confused and asked, "What do you mean?"
Cersie said, "It goes by last name. Both of your last names start with "A". Technically speaking Cassadie is right but she will be first since her name starts with a "C". I will be one of the last ones."
Cassadie and I both looked at her surprised. Cassadie looked at me with the same expression. She chuckled a little bit and asked, "Why do you look so surprised? I thought you would have known this from being the student body president?"
I changed my expression to realization and with a chuckle I said, "Oh yeah. You're right. I just kinda forgot at the moment."
When I said that, they both started laughing and Cassadie said, "Wow dear sister you sure do forget things a lot."
We got quiet for a moment when we heard our principal, Ms. Nancy Calliope, say, "Okay boys and girls I have a few things to say. Before we head out to the field I just want to say that I am so proud of each and one of you. Now I know today has so many emotions for a lot of you but this is the start of your life. With that said all of you start putting on your gowns and caps. When you are finished lineup in alphabetical order, with last names first. Once we are all lined up we will walk to the field straight to the chairs. The band and choir members know when to get up and do everything. I will give you all a moment to get yourselves together and we will start heading out in 10 minutes."
I looked at both Cassadie and Cersie. They both took in a deep breath and started to get ready. I decided to do the same thing. I grabbed my star charm and thought, 'Well Kylie baby we are graduating today. I just hope we do this together and I can give you that kiss that I was planning on giving you.'
I was brought out of my thoughts when I felt a hand on my shoulder. I looked at the hand and followed it and saw it was Cassadie. She was giving me a sympathetic smile. I gave her a smile back and the next thing I knew I was being brought in a tight hug. She is way taller than me so she rested her chin on my head. There was a moment of silence before she spoke in a soft voice, "Listen, I know that you are excited about today but I could also see you hiding your sadness about today and I get it. I know you miss her and I know you wanted to do this with her."
I nodded my head slowly. I could feel my eyes fill up with tears. I moved my arms up slowly and gripped the back of her gown tightly; I know my knuckles are turning white. "I also want her here because she's my best friend too. I miss her so much. Just know that she is proud of you and she wants to be here too." I couldn't hold them anymore and felt the tears run down my face. I buried my face in her chest and cried.
I heard her sniffle as she said. "But I also know that she would also want you to go out there with the biggest smile on your face and if you were to cry, which I know you will, that they better be tears of happiness and not of sadness because you know she will pop up and kick you for having them of sadness."
We both did a sad chuckle at that because we know it's true.
There was a moment of silence before we heard Cersie say, "The principal said it's time to line up and start heading out now."
I pulled away from Cassadie and wiped away my tears. I took a deep breath in, looked up at her with a smile on my face and said, "Ok. I'm ready."
When we made it to the left side of the bleachers right in front of the football field, the principal turned to us and smiled. She said, "Now remember boys and girls we don't start going out until we hear the band place the music. Band and choir members I trust that all of you all know when to get up and head to your seats?" I looked around and saw heads nod.
The principal nodded her head with a small smile and said, "Good. Now remember when you make it to your seats please remain standing until everyone has made it and you are instructed to do so. When we make it to the first row I will have to leave and make it to the stage and properly start the ceremony."
We all nodded our heads.
As we waited for the music to start I looked at the crowd. The bleachers on our "home" side were completely full, hardly any empty spots. I looked across the field to the "visitors" side and I saw it was almost the same thing. When I saw all the people I felt my heart starting to race and I was breathing hard. I closed my eyes tight and put my right hand on my chest and squeezed it tightly. It was getting hard to breathe. Just as the anxiety attack was going to happen I was pulled into a hug. I opened my eyes and saw light pink hair.
She said, "It's ok. Slowly take a deep breath in for three seconds and at the top of breath hold it in for six seconds."
I did as she said.
Softly she said, "Good now exhale all of it slowly and gently."
After we did that I felt much better. I let go, smiled at her and asked, "How did you know I was having an attack?"
She smiled back and said, "When I heard your breathing getting heavier I turned around and saw you clenching your chest pretty tightly. I just knew an attack was coming. I handled it like I always did when we were kids."
I felt my cheeks grow hot. I felt embarrassed. "Well thank you for that."
She gave me a smile and said, "You are very welcome. Also remember that I am right in front of you so if you need me again you can always just grab my hand."
Right when she turned back around we heard the music start. It was time to start moving to the field. When we started to walk I felt my anxiety coming again. I saw Cassadie's hand and grabbed it. She was a bit shocked but held my hand tightly. We finally made it to our seats. We had to stand for a while. I looked around and I was able to see Cersie. I gave a tiny wave and she did the same thing.
I was brought back to my scenes when I saw the principal walk up to the stage and microphone. She cleared her throat and said, "Hello ladies and gentlemen and welcome to Crystal Lake Academy's annual graduation ceremony. We all like to thank you all for coming out. Now before we start calling out the students' names to get their diplomas we will hear a speech from our valedictorian, then hear our band and choir play a few songs and we will commence with the ceremony." She spoke for a little bit longer introducing all of the people on the stage with her such as the vice principal and other people on the school board. "Now without any further ado I would like for the valedictorian Emily Russo to come up and present her speech."
A girl with long brown hair that goes halfway down her back with dark blue eyes. I can see a dark blue ribbon around her neck and light blue, I'm sure fake, roses on the right side of her hair. She had a single golden star in her right ear. She had her gown zipped open so we all could see that she had a white and blue spaghetti strap dress with a sweetheart neckline with a bow at the bottom of it. She had the same blue roses on the right side of her hip. She had on white and blue heels
As she made her way to the stand I saw her breathing in and out slowly as if she was preparing herself for her speech. She put her hand on her chest and clenched her gown and did one last big breath in. She looked up and said, "Good evening everyone, I am Emily Russo, and welcome to Crystal Lake Academy graduation ceremony. It is with great honor that I am able to address my classmates and everyone who has come to support us on this great accomplishment in our young lives. I know we all had so much fun in the past four years we have been here. I know most of us got in trouble and did stuff we are not supposed to, no names mentioned but you know who you are."
I heard the graduating class laugh and even some in the stands. I even chuckled a bit because I am in that category.
She stayed chuckling for a bit then continued to say, "I also know that some of us didn't really do much and just played it safe. I also know that most of us have laughed, loved and lost."
When she said that I felt my heart pang with pain. I started to tear up. I held my star-charm and thought, 'Kylie baby, I miss you so much. I wish you were here to graduate with us. With the year and half you were here I had so much fun. I am so lucky to be able to fall in love with you. I love everything about you.'
She continued to say, "I would like to start by thanking our parents, guardians, teachers, and other supporters for doing everything in their power to help us get to this point. From the simple words of encouragement before a test or quiz to the countless meals, and rides to and from school events and activities, they have been by our sides through it all. From a personal standpoint I would like to thank my parents and family members for all the help and motivation they have given me. I know I would not have been able to do this without them."
There was a moment of silence as she continued to say, "I know that most of us are scared, anxious and nervous about finally starting our lives outside of school. I am with you on all of that also. I know that we will do our best and we are going to do just fine. I know we all have a goal and I am personally rooting for all of you. When our class reunion comes around I can't wait to hear about all of your accomplishments. Congratulations everyone! WE MADE IT!"
As she made her way down back to her seat the graduation class and I all cheered and the stands got even louder. I heard yelling, cheers along with cowbells.
The principal came back on the stage and said, "Well thank you very much Emily for your lovely speech. Now let's commence with the ceremony." More speeches happened and the band and choir did their music.
The principal came back up and said, "Ok now that all of that is over we will now call on our students to come up and get their diplomas."
Since my and Cassadie's last names start with "A" we are one of the first ones. There were only about 10 people in front of us. "Cassadie Adachi." I looked up to the crowd and I was trying to find our parents. I heard a big horn and a lot of yelling. I looked at the noise and saw our parents with some of our cousins, aunts, uncles and even grandparents. Also Cersie's family next to all of ours. I saw her tense up a bit and held her breath. She walked up and had a big smile on her face. She got her diploma, held it outwards for a picture with the principal. Afterwards she gave a handshake and walked away with a smile on her face while waving at everyone.
"Elsie Adachi." I heard my name but it seemed like I was stuck in my spot frozen. I did what Cassadie did. I breathed in, held my breath and let it go slowly. I started walking up the stage. While I was walking to receive my diploma it was like everything got quiet. I didn't hear anyone yelling or screaming almost like no one was excited for me. Honestly that thought made me sad. I saw the principal and my homeroom teacher, Mr. Hito Tashido, switching places, she handed him my diploma and held it. When I finally made it he gave me a big smile and he said, "I am so proud of you Elsie. You came a long way from being that shy girl that started in my class to being the student body president. I know you were heartbroken and you really don't like talking about it and it's completely understandable but I am glad you are better from it."
I gave him a sad smile and said, "Thank you so much for saying so Mr. Tashido! I am trying to become less shy and be more outgoing. Yes it is very hard to talk about it. I am trying my best to be better from it all though it still hurts."
He gave me a hug and said, "Yes I know and I understand but just know it will get better."
He pulled away, gave me a smile and said, "Congratulations." He handed me my diploma with his left hand and I grabbed it with my left hand. He held out his right hand and gave me a handshake. We both turned to the camera and got our picture taken. I walked off the stage and walked back to my chair. As soon as I sat down I was pulled into a hug and she practically screamed, "I CAN'T BELIEVE WE ACTUALLY DID IT ELSIE!"
I hugged her just as tightly and said, "I know it's so crazy to think we are finally done with highschool and we are going to start our lives now."
While we waited we had a conversation and occasionally cheered for our non-mutual friends we heard, "Cersie Milano." We stood up and yelled really loud. We both looked to the stand and saw our family and her family cheering for her.
We had a conversation again and heard other kids' names. Finally at the very end the principal went to the stage and said, "Now on behalf of me, the student body and everyone here I would love to say graduated seniors please move your tassels to the left side."
She waited until we all did.
She smiled and said, "Congratulations Class of XXXX you have all graduated!"
Right when she said that the whole place erupted into a loud cheer. We all grabbed our graduation caps and threw them in the air.
I quickly grabbed my hat off the floor and put it back on my head. I looked toward Cassadie and saw she grabbed her cap and put it back on her head. I grabbed her hand and ran.
I heard Cassadie yell, "Whoa, where are we going?!"
As we ran I was looking around. When I finally spotted red hair I ran into her and gave her a huge hug and threw Cassadie around. We all hugged and cried. After we let go of the hug we went to look for our parents. We gave them a hug.
I heard my mother say, "Cassadie and Elsie take a picture together."
It was like the emotions happened all over again. I hugged her and cried on her shoulder. I had my left arm wrapped around Cassadie's back and my right hand in her hair on her neck. My face was facing the camera and I could feel the tears falling down my face. Cassadie was holding me the same way; I can hear her crying her eyes out as well. I had a yellow bow that had small sunflowers printed all over it at the end of my hair
My mother then said, "Ok now Elsie I want you to look at me and hold her diploma in your hand and I will take your picture on your phone. You can send it to Kylie."
I put my right hand in the back of my head and held my diploma in my left hand. My graduation gown was zipped open and you can see my sunflower dress. I gave a huge wide open smile with my eyes closed. I could feel tears in them
After the picture was taken I heard Cersie's mom say, "Ok girls now I want a picture with all of you together."
Cersie was on the left, she closed one eye, I was in the middle with both of my eyes closed and Cassadie was on the right side with both of her eyes open. She put her diploma in her jacket pocket. We all smiled and held out a peace sign ✌🏼.
After so many more pictures we finally finished. My father said, "Ok everyone I think that is enough pictures for the night. How about we all go get a bite to eat then we can all go home and rest? We need it for tomorrow because we have a party to celebrate for tonight."
It was almost like all of us forgot about that because Cassadie said, "Oh yeah! Honestly I forgot all about that!"
Cersie and I both started laughing and at the same time said, "I forgot about it too!"
We all went out to eat at a burger place since it was one of the only places open close to midnight. We had a good time. After we finished eating we went home.
When we arrived at home we all took off our shoes at the entryway.
As we walked our way to our respective rooms we heard our father say, "Goodnight girls and I love you both and I am very proud of you both." He walked over to us and gave us a hug.
Our mother walked to us and joined the hug and said, "Yes your father right. We love you both very much and are very proud of you both."
I buried my head in my father's neck and cried. I looked up and when I heard sniffling. I looked and saw Cassadie with her head buried in our mother's neck.
We pulled away, wiped our faces and Cassadie said, "Thank you Mama and Papa. It means so much. We love you both so much also."
I nodded my head and said, "Cassadie is right. Thank you and we love you both. Goodnight Mama and Papa."
We all gave each other a soft smile and we walked to our respective rooms. I changed into my pajamas, pulled the covers away and layed down in bed. I pulled the covers to the base of my neck. I turned to lay on my left shoulder. I grabbed my star charm with my right hand and looked out the window. As I stared at the full light blue moon I thought, 'Well I finally did it Kylie baby. I graduated high school. I hope you are proud of me and I can see you soon. I love you so much, baby. Always and forever no matter what.'
I closed my eyes and had a peaceful night's sleep.
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