Becky yay you are here, Char wasn't too sure if you could make it with, well...How is she" Engfa asked sympathetically as she gripped Becky's elbow tightly.
Typical Engfa she always cared about others and was a good friend, Char was a lucky girl that Engfa was willing to put up with her for the rest of her life.
"She's. well, you know" Becky frowned.
Irin had begged Becky since she got back from Freen's office this afternoon to end her life.
Just plain and simple inject her with enough morphine until it sent into a coma and her organs one by one would shut down and finally her heart.
Becky was grateful when she checked her phone forgetting that tonight was the dress rehearsal for the wedding despite the fact Becky knew Faye was going to be here, she needed out of the house.
Time to think was she willing to give Irin what she wanted...a free pass to death while Becky had to live with the consequences...
"Becky....Becky..." Char shook her friends as Becky gasped shaking her thoughts away.
"You ok babes" Char asked concerned as she glared at Becky.
"Yeah sorry...I was miles away" Becky smiled and she coughed looking towards the kitchen of her old flat as she heard Faye's irritating laugh. Ugh maybe this wasn't where she wanted to be after all...
"Come on in. the girls are all in their dresses" Char smiled as she tugged her friend by the elbow.
Making her way into the kitchen the girls all whipped their heads around to greet her.
"Hi Rebecca" Faye smiled as she gripped onto Freen who gave Becky a loving smile.
"Come on babe your turn to show us how hot you look" Engfa smiled as she took Becky by the hand and led her out towards her old room.
Becky needed to keep it together, but she couldn't...she couldn't do this...an evening with snotty remarks from Faye and small talk about the latest bimbo on the runway. a drink is what Becky needed.
Becky sighed as she plonked down on the bed holding the purple dress...she needed to suck it up and be happy tonight. this was Char and Engfa's big day in a week.
She needed to be good and leave whatever else was going at the door. She heard the front door opening again followed by muffling voices as she stood up and began to get undressed, standing in her underwear the bedroom door burst open.
"Oh, hello there sexy" Friend's eyes widened as they circulated around Becky's body.
Becky looked over Friend's shoulder seeing Char roll her eyes along with Faye giggling and Freen stood uncomfortably as they were heading for the sofa.
"Shut the door Friend" Becky shouted covering her bra and knickers not that it was much help. Friend laughed as she gripped the door and shut it from the inside.
"Do you mind" Becky snapped reaching for the dress as Friend shook her head.
"Not at all...not at all" she smirked her eyes perving over Ally.
Becky couldn't help but let out a short laugh despite everything she was glad Friend was here.
"Here let me help" Friend said as she took half of the dress allowing Becky to slip it over her head.
"Thanks" Becky mumbled.
"I haven't heard from you in a couple of days, how have you been" Friend asked as Becky suddenly felt herself tear up.
"Hey" Friend hushed as Becky was full blown in tears now.
Friend gripped Becky in her arms as she sat them on the edge of the bed.
"What's going on baby girl...let it out" Friend sighed as she rubbed a sobbing Becky's shoulder.
**
"What took you so long... oh wow Becky you look stunning" Engfa gasped as Becky gave a nervous smile as she stepped out of her old room in her bridesmaid dress.
"Looking sexy Armstrong" Char blurted which earned her a smack from Engfa as they began to laugh.
"Exactly what I said" Friend agreed giving Becky's bum a light pinch as she picked up the bottles she brought from the bar.
"Who's for some champagne" Friend asked as she held the bottles in her hand and made her way to the kitchen.
"I'll help with the glasses" Freen mumbled standing up and following Friend swiftly into the kitchen.
"What the fuck are you playing at" Freen snapped in a low harsh tone as she made sure everyone else was still fussing over the dresses.
"I don't know what you mean Doc" Friend teased searching the cupboards for some wine glasses.
"You know Becky is with me, so stop that shit with her" Freen snapped harshly as she folded her arms.
Her blood was boiling, she groaned inwardly as soon as Char opened the door and in walked Friend with a box full of booze.
Freen wanted to grab Friend by the hair when she watched the older woman walk towards Becky's old room as soon as Friend found out where Becky was.
She was jealous, jealous that Friend could just walk in on Becky whenever she wanted, and it seemed normal. There was no way she herself could just get up from the sofa and walk into the room.
Give Becky a kiss and tell her how much she missed her even if it was only 5 hours since she last seen Becky. Friend was doing this on purpose, the flirting and bum pinching it was everything Freen couldn't do in front of the other women.
One more week and Freen would be free. She couldn't wait to bring Becky on a holiday away from here. 2 weeks of just the two of them, somewhere sunny and hot where she could perve on Becky all day in a bikini, the next week was going to be torture and Friend was making sure of it.
"Oh, calm your tits, Becky was upset so I was just being there for her since you are too busy behaving yourself in front of Cruella de villa out there" Friend whispered back as she counted the glasses.
"Upset" Freen frowned.
Becky had been in a great mood this afternoon in her office...more than great, why was she upset now.
"What do you mean upset" Freen asked as Friend ignored her as she began to pour the champagne into glasses.
"Friend for fuck's sake answer me" Freen snapped as she yanked the bottle from the older woman's hand.
Friend sighed as she played nervously with one of the wine glasses.
Becky had broken down, she looked so fragile in that room while Friend tried her hardest to be there for her but how was Friend to know what to do.
Becky was put in a shitty position by Irin, fuck Friend was heartless at the best of times but if one of her mates asked her to overdose them. Friend was sure she wouldn't have the balls to.
Freen clearly didn't have a fucking clue what was going on and Friend wasn't about to land Becky into it, telling a doctor about this was the last thing Becky needed even if it was her ex-wife.
"Look it's not my place to say...Becky needs you right now Freen" Friend said honestly as she looked into the surgeon's worried eyes.
"I know we don't see eye to eye but we both want what's best for that fragile girl out there...so I'm telling you...she needs you to just be there for her" Friend said as she picked up the filled glasses and left a confused Freen stood in the kitchen.
Freen carried the last of the glasses as she soon followed Friend out handing a nervous looking Friend and Becky the remaining glasses as Becky gave her a weak smile.
Freen knew Becky had been crying, she hated seen those brown eyes in pain, she wished she could just make it all go away.
"Can we talk for a minute" Freen whispered to Becky as Becky nervously glanced over to Faye who was deep in conversation with Engfa and Engfa's sister.
"Go on I've got you covered just hurry up" Friend grumbled as she took the bottle from Freen's hand and began to distract the others as Becky and Freen quietly made their way back into the kitchen.
"BB are you ok" Freen asked concerned as she placed her hands on Freen's hips.
Becky's tears began to fall as she wrapped her arms around Freen... what was she going to do...she needed to make her mind up soon, could she tell Freen what Irin wanted her to do.
Freen was still technically her consultant, if she knew about it, she could go to the police or anything.
"Baby, tell me what's wrong, I want to help you" Freen whispered as she began to wipe Becky's tears away begging for the nurse to open up to her.
Becky's eyes locked with Freen's; she could see the worry in Freen's eyes. She couldn't dump this on Freen.
Freen had enough stress to deal with, with work and telling Faye the truth next week. She didn't need this too.
Becky had to make her own mind up about this.
Irin was strict in her instructions for Freen her bloody doctor not to know anything about this.
"Nothing, I'm just a little teary is all" Becky sniffed as she braved a smile. Freen gave her a confused look before giving her a smile and taking her lips against her own for a short kiss.
"You look beautiful by the way" Freen smiled causing Becky's smile to widen really was for the best that Freen didn't know what Becky was up to at least until she figured out what she was going to do.
**
Becky shut the front door quietly, she had just endured an awkward drive back to Irin's.
Faye insisting that Freen drove Becky home on their way back to Freen's. Becky tried her hardest to say she would be fine in a taxi, but Faye was having none of it.
Making sure she held onto Freen as much as she could in the passenger seat with her small talk about fashion week.
Becky sighed in the back seat, and she stared out the window, occasionally glancing at the drivers mirror Freen's eyes were staring back as she focused on the road every now and then.
Becky had managed to keep it together for the remainder of the night. She gave Freen a weak smile through the mirror as they pulled up in front of Irin's house mumbled her goodbyes and quickly made her way into Irin's house.
"Rebecca is that you" Irin's hoarse voice echoed out as Becky took a deep breath and made her way into the sitting room. The room was filled with darkness as Becky went to put the small lamp on nearby.
"How was your night" Irin questioned as Becky stared at her clammy skin, taking a seat next to the fragile woman she looked into Irin's grey eyes, this wasn't her boss anymore.
The Irin Wilson she knew, this was a woman who had given up a long time ago and needed her freedom.
Becky glanced around the darkened was cruelty. Irin lying here day after day barely eating or drinking and having Becky having to clean up after her because she was too weak to move., her skin was starting to break down.
Sure, the pain was being managed with the morphine Becky had been giving Irin, but it could never take way the pain Irin felt inside spending her life looking after others.
Now here she was living a life she always feared of having. Becky could see it clearly now...she needed to let Irin go, let her make her own choice now.
Irin didn't choose to have cancer, but she could at least choose when she was going to die and not let the cancer beat her to it.
"I'll do it" Becky said as Irin's eyes furrowed.
"Rebecca" Irin whispered as warmth began to fill her teary eyes.
"Just give me tonight with you Irin" Becky said as she wiped away her own tears, gripping Irin's hand in her own, she knew she was doing the right thing.
**
Freen felt the sickness rise to her throat as she raced up the entrance of Irin's house.
Checking her voice mail as she left theatre a little under an hour ago, she got here as quickly as she could.
Seeing the three missed calls from Becky's number and one voice mail she felt her heart sink listening to Becky's low timid voice she asked Freen to get her as soon as she could.
Freen panicked as she sat in the back of a taxi through lunch hour traffic repeatedly trying to get in contact with Becky but there was no answer.
She had even rung Char and Friend on her way over, but they hadn't heard from Becky since last night.
"BB" Freen shouted up the stairs as she entered the quiet house, there was nothing. She made her way into the sitting room.
Becky was knelt her head bowed down as her body shook with emotion as Irin's lifeless body lay in peace, Becky gripped onto rigid hand.
"Babe" Freen choked back her tears as she dropped her handbag and knelt next to the sobbing nurse.
Becky's reddened eyes looked up into Freen's as she began to sob harder this time as Freen wrapped her arms around her. As Freen held Becky into her chest, her heart sank further as she noticed the numerous empty vials of morphine... what the hell was going on...
5 more chapters to go! Do you guys want to read something new after this book? leave a comment :)) as always thank you so much for reading :)) HAPPY SUNDAY! I will upload next chapter tom!