Adelaide remained in the infirmary for a week, trying to gain back some of her previous health. It was a bit weird eating food after forgoing it for so long and at first it felt foreign and weird to her, but slowly, with every bite, every meal, she felt less bad, even though sometimes it seemed as if she was returning back to square one, things were progressing, very slowly, but progressing. She was visited everyday by her sisters, and once, Elizabeth brought Narcissa with her and Helena visited her with Pandora and Maud.
"So, what will you do after this year, Cissy?" Adelaide asked her.
"Oh, um... nothing special. Well, Lucius proposed to me the last Hogsmeade trip." Narcissa blushed a bit and raised her hand, showing a big emerald gem, with some diamonds around it, on a delicate silver, on her finger. Adelaide gasped and Elizabeth laughed at her expression.
"So when's the wedding?"
"The wedding is set on October next year, on a weekend. I really wanted you to be one of my bridesmaids, you would really be a lovely one and of course, so if it's possible for you to attend I'd want you to have that honour, of course. Lizzie would be my maid of honour."
"The honour will be mine." Though she frowned a bit when she remembered her encounter with Lucius in the secret meeting, but seeing Narcissa's happy and relaxed expression, she knew that it was not the time to enquire about this and Narcissa was definitely not in that cult or whatever it was.
"So after that what you'll do?"
"Nothing special, i guess. Well, there will be a lot of society functions to attend and do party plannings and rule the society, you know, being the lady of the Malfoy Manor. I really wasn't into having career even without my father's discouragements, but now i am most certain i don't want to do anything. Later, when the time is right, i want to be a mother and raise a child."
Elizabeth wished to pursue something other than ministry work or a job that related to academic skills, despite her great talent and scores in them. She wished to become an artist, and seeing her works were testaments of her great talent.
When she was visited by Helena and her friends, they talked about everything and gossiped so much that her head was hurting by the time they left.
"I put chilli sauce in Wilkes' soup. He was dying and turned so red that people thought that he would, i don't know, die from choking! It was fun watching him struggle. Serves him right for laughing at Joanna and reading her diary." Maud was recounting the story of their dinner last night.
"But, really... who gave you that idea? And where did find the sauce?"
"Oh, when we're nagging about Wilkes, Sirius heard us and stepped in, to help «A classmate of his' little sister and her friends» Helena died from blushing then. He stole it somehow from somewhere and told me when to put it in his soup." Pandora replied.
"Please. Sometimes their pranks can go south when they take them to the next level, please don't get involved with him or any of his friends." Adelaide advised them.
"We know but it was fun still. Like please, i don't think anyone would have thought Wilkes having zero tolerance for some spice!"
On her second day of retaining her consciousness, she was visited by Remus. She was a bit surprised but quite happy.
"Hi, Adelaide. I wanted to come here sooner but, i thought that perhaps you wanted some time too and um... if you don't want me here, it's fine. I'll go."
"Oh no, thanks for coming here Remus. I did wish for some company now." Adelaide smiled at him.
"Oh, here's some chocolate. I figured that we could make it a tradition, bringing chocolate to the one who was in the infirmary or sick. This one's gotten a white chocolate flavour with chocolate chips in."
Adelaide was touched by his gesture but when Remus brought forward the chocolate bar, whether it was due to seeing it or noticing the big size of it, she felt weird. Remus, noticing Adelaide's fallen smile, panicked and said:
"Oh, Dela, i am so sorry! You were struggling with eating and all... i should not have brought something edible, oh, i am so stupid..."
"Hey Remus, don't panic. It's ok. You didn't kill me. My relationship with food isn't easy but i will fix it. Right now, i am working on it, so please, don't get disheartened by my reaction, i truly appreciate it and i think it will be a lovely tradition." Adelaide smiled at him.
They talked for some time and he left. Adelaide slept a bit afterwards and when she woke up, she saw William sitting beside her.
"Hi, long time no see." Adelaide joked.
"Oh Dela. You worried me to death! There was some rumours of you dying or something. I felt like i was having a heart attack! How are you doing now?"
"I am fine. Don't worry, see. I am not a ghost, my hand doesn't skim through you." Adelaide giggled as she punched him gently on his arm. He gave her an unamused look.
"And you still joke about this. I find this ability of yours still intact."
"Oh, i did faint and was unconscious for two days, but my ability to still joke about my possible death, will never be lost."
He rolled his eyes and then said: "I can't believe I didn't see your condition worsening. How can i be called your friend when I didn't notice your fading away?"
"Oh William, just because i hid it well, you don't have to beat yourself up for it. I am better than i was before and continue to get better, no need for your feeling guilty. Sometimes you really can't tell or you don't notice when someone needs help."
He nodded and gave her a wreath of flowers, mostly pink roses.
"Oh, thanks for those flowers. They are very lovely, you do have some incredible taste." She half hugged him, as she took the wreath away. His cheeks were tainted pink.
"Do you have allergic reactions to roses?"
"No, why?"
"Because your cheeks are pink right now."
"Oh, no, it's... it happens, nothing serious."
He left after some time too, and Adelaide felt better, knowing that some of her friends did care for him her health.
The next day, while she was eating another meal of plain food( porridge with sugar and some tea) she heard the doors of the infirmary opening again. There was some whispers and then to her surprise, when she lifted her head, saw her girlfriends, the 6 girls that she had not been talking to for nearly 3 months. She was very happy but nervous to see them.
They paused near her bed, looking at her in silence. The awkward silence was stretched until Marlene broke the silence: "Adelaide,...."
"Adelaide, what the hell did happen there? Oh my god! We were scared to death! We thought you died!" Sarah shouted and was met with madam Pomfrey's glare from the other side of the infirmary.
"Oops." Sarah said looking down.
"Adelaide, we all wanted to apologise for our behaviour, before Sarah interrupted us..." Marlene continued, when she gave Sarah a playful glare, "So, um, we were very unreasonable and didn't understand you nor sympathise with you enough."
"I myself didn't let you in and pushed you away. It was wrong for me to do that. It seemed as if i didn't value our friendship as much, but in fact, i did. I am sorry myself."
"Well, darling, you were wrong, but we were deeply in the wrong as well, even more so. People who grief, they have ways to live through it and sometimes they can be very destructive and not so kind to their loved ones, but they need to understand that grieving person as well." Alice told her as she looked in her eyes, her big brown orbs widening. She grabbed her hands and squeezed them.
"You were right on some points and were wrong on other stuff, about our behaviour in mean. I refused to understand that you could still be at fault and still be right. Your words made us see things clearly about ourselves and now i can bear some criticism and not act like an idiot."
"I was a very big gossiper, i mean spreading rumours or telling wrong people some information is not good. Judging people and making unsympathetic comments to them should be red line that no one should cross." Mary continued.
"I am very sorry that i stood in the sidelines and just let it happen because i don't like conflict. I mean, sometimes people need to challenge stuff and understand each other's perspectives and problems this way. I should have said and done more." Dorcas replied with some guilt.
"And i am very sorry for being self-centred and too hot-headed to listen to anyone else. I am working on it and frankly, i am doing much better. I was very stressed about quidditch and since i really weren't ever so stressed about anything in my life, i just blew it. I want to learn to control my anger and try to think before reacting." Marlene nodded solemnly.
"I need to be able to stand my ground and understand that i need to step up and be able to take people accountable for their actions and not be pushed around." Sarah said as tears gathered in the corner of her eyes.
"I needed to push you more and tried more to get you back. Perhaps i gave up to easily or chose to lie to myself that you were doing alright, while you were fading away slowly and nobody, including me, noticed, until it was late." Lily said as she surveyed her.
After some silence, Adelaide whispered: "And i learned that i need to confide into my loved ones and ask for help. I learned that pushing people away not only hurts them, but makes yourself hurt more. I also learned that i am no burden."
They all looked at her hopefully, waiting for some response. "I mean, we promised each other that we'd remain friends even in turmoil, isn't it? So i guess, as much as i am stuck with you, you are stuck with me. So let's be friends again." They nearly suffocated her with a hug. Adelaide felt a great relief, as if a great weight had been lifted off her and she let a breath that she thought as if she was keeping since the beginning of Summer.
They talked for nearly an hour, well mostly Adelaide talked, about what really happened since she returned home last Summer to her tragedy-fallen family, dealing with grief and the start of her eating disorder and everything. Some tears were shed, she also cried a bit too.
"What happened after i fainted? I mean, i only felt like fading away and everything went black."
"Well, you were with Remus, Somerset and Black walked towards you, i suppose they asked something. Then you just fainted and nearly fell to the ground, were it not for Somerset's quick reaction. He held you before you hit the ground or your head hitting somewhere." Lily answered her. Adelaide felt weird and stupid when she realised that not only was she seen by her rival at her weakest moment, she was also helped by him.
"It was romantic. Seriously, who knew Somerset would be the knight in the shining armour." Sarah giggled as all of them smirked and looked back at Adelaide who had hidden her face in the pillow and groaning.
"You shut up! He is a-"
"Stupid arrogant piece of shit? You said something like that before, no need to get your mouth dirty by some swear words."Alice laughed. Adelaide groaned.
"I never thought you would swear much less slapping someone. You totally lost your shit there." Marlene joked.
"Yeah i never thought you had it in you." Lily agreed as she had some weird glint in her eyes, as if she was already saving and analysing Adelaide's reaction for later.
"Well, now that you know, you can stop playing around." Adelaide finally lifted her head from the pillow, and they giggled.
...............
After Adelaide was discharged, the only time that she was alone, was when she was eating, as eating around people or in crowded places made her stressed and uncomfortable and that would make her loose her appetite. She would either eat in her dorm, or sometimes in the orchard or astronomy tower. Since she was taking food from the infirmary her food was simple and plain and she did crave the food from the great hall, as she was healed enough to eat more complex foods and sometimes eating alone did stress her and it could be hard, reminding herself to eat. If she had a few companions, perhaps things would get less tense and she could eat more and forget that she was gaining back her health.
A few days after she was discharged from the infirmary during lunch, Lily dragged her, claiming that she had an important thing to show her. Adelaide felt hungry and wanted to get back to her food, at her dormitory.
Lily put her hands on her eyes and said: "Don't look until i tell you. If you do i swear i would..."
"Ok, just hurry up, i do feel hungry a bit."
After they walked for sometime; with Lily guiding her, they reached somewhere, when Lily took away her hands and said: "Look."
Adelaide opened her eyes and saw a picnic blanket under a willow tree near the castle, where it was Lily and Severus' favourite spot. Severus was also sitting on the blanket waving at them, and on the blanket was some food and they were all from the great hall.
"Hi Dela, we thought that perhaps eating with a few people would make you ease up a bit and normalise things for you sooner. We also brought some of your favourite dessert too." Severus said as he pointed to the cheesecake.
Adelaide felt so happy that her friends did take tome to consider her and felt happy tears flowing down her cheeks. Some of them were also due to sorrow. The sorrow of loosing her normal body function, to be hungry, to feel comforted by eating or simple joy from eating her favourite dessert.
Severus and Lily acted normal and didn't stare at her and didn't remark on her eating or tears. And that helped. A great deal.
When Adelaide returned to her common room, the riddle was:
"I am the balm for wounds unseen,
Through me, the broken are made clean.
What am i?"
"Healing." She replied quickly.
Adelaide returned back to her dormitory and found a picture that she hadn't looked at it in months. It was a picture of her family, an animated one, that was taken before the Summer fair, two years ago. They all looked happy. She stared at it and felt more tears coming down her cheeks when she looked at her mother.
The mother who loved them all so much.
The mother who felt as if she failed them because of her illness.
The mother who was selfless and always tried to be there for them as much as she could.
The mother who went through a lot in her life and managed to still be kind and loving.
She wanted to wish things were like before, but it was not possible, so why wish the impossible? She only wished for a quick healing. She wished for a better year and longer lives for her loved ones, even if it meant for her to live a much shorter life than them. She wished that they wouldn't go through something like that ever again.
She wiped her tears and put the picture on the nightstand beside her. She had let all of the tears that she had kept inside her, free these past two weeks. Her tears were finished. So did her painful sadness. Of course she would never be over her mother's death, the death of your loved one is never something you «get» over it, but something that you learn to deal with everyday. Some days were easier and some days were harder.
Adelaide knew that and decided to continue to see what would happen in the future...