"You aren't seriously thinking we should leave her behind are you?" Hearing the familiar sound of Hershel's voice, woke me up.
Blinking away the sleep in my eyes I gazed at my surroundings. I was laying on the cold hard ground, with a blanket over top of me. The semi transparent material of a tent above me, letting light filter through.
"No I didn't say that." Andrea's voice spoke up now, answering Hershel.
"Good, cause there is no way she could last out there in her condition." He calmly stated.
I knew they were talking about me, and obviously people weren't happy I was back. Which I guess was ok, they had a right to think what they wanted.
"She ain't hurt that badly." Hearing footsteps fast approaching Shane quickly added his two sense.
"Did you even look at her? Her arm is badly broken, beyond anything I can fix. She has a dislocated shoulder, a massive cut to her face." Rattling off my injuries, I moved slowly and looked down at myself.
Lifting my left arm up slowly I noticed that it was held in place by a tattered piece of cloth. Acting as a sling, it kept my arm from moving. Around my forearm was two twigs, wrapped tight with some gauze. My other arm seem untouched, the gauze that Milton put on still in place.
"She's a member of this group Shane we aren't leaving anyone behind." This time I heard Ricks voice speak up. "We stick together."
I really didn't remember much of last night. I knew I rested against Rick as we stood there watching Woodbury slowly burn out. But after that, I couldn't even tell you how I got into this tent, let alone back to camp.
"Still can't believe that little girl in there, gone and torched that town!" Rolling my eyes, I covered my head with the blanket at Merle's voice. Frankly I didn't even understand why he was here.
"Shut up Merle!" Holding my breath I heard the one voice I wasn't expecting... Daryl's. "All y'all shut up 'bout her." He scuffled. Even from the tent I could hear how pissed he was.
He was probably still angry at me over the ID. But there wasn't anything I could do about it now. What's been done has been done, and if he doesn't trust me I have to live with it.
Hearing the voices outside the tent drop to a low hush, I figured they ended the talk for good. Thankfully after a few seconds the crunching of leaves, filled the air as they walked off in some direction. Probably back to the rest of the group.
That's when I heard the zipper on the tent being opened. Great! Is someone here to kick me out already?
Staying completely still, I closed my eyes shut and listened to someone crawl into the tent. The plastic material on the bottom ruffling as they stepped onto it. Once inside I heard the zipper again as they probably shut the tent back up.
Feeling the material of the tent crinkle beneath me, I knew who ever it was, was now laying down next to me. Their hot breath gently blowing against the skin of my face.
"What he do to ye?" Daryl finally spoke, addressing no one in particular. His hand sliding against my cheek, brushing some of my wild hair out of my face.
Giving up trying to pretend that I was asleep, I let my eyes open slowly. Finding his face extremely close to mine.
"Hi." I weakly muttered, as I searched his face. Looking for any kind of emotion he might have.
But as usual, Daryl just laid there with a hard expression. While he quickly withdrew his hand from my skin. Despite what happened between us, I felt a frown tug on my lips as he pulled away.
"How long ye been awake?" He asked, being short in his words.
"Not very long." I answered him quietly as I watched him sit up. His back against one of the sides of the tent while he looked at me.
Deciding that I didn't want him staring at me all day, I sat up across from him. Pulling my legs in, sitting indian style. While I careful moved my arm, avoiding any sudden movements that would probably hurt like hell.
My eyes found his, and I desperately searched for something that would give away his thoughts. But it was useless, Daryl was about as open as a padlocked safe.
We sat there in silence for a few moments, until he spoke up again.
"Ye ok?" To me he didn't really seem interested in the answer, he was just trying to make this situation less awkward.
He doesn't do well in social situations so I could only imagine how hard this was for Daryl. On top of that Daryl was never one for showing a caring side.
"You can go, I don't need someone watching me." I muttered, completely ignoring his question. "I'm not your responsibility."
Dropping my head, I let out a sigh. My fingers gently playing with the frayed edge of the blackish green t-shirt I was wearing. Judging by how loose it was against my frame, it had to be one of the guys.
"I know ye ain't." He spoke up, but I kept my eyes on my tent ground. Following the wrinkles in the fabric.
"Then why are you here?" Finding the courage inside I looked back up at him. My eyes intently staring into his. "Or are you just waiting for the perfect moment to kill me?" Shrugging my shoulders, I combed back my hair pushing it away from my face.
His face contorted as he heard what I said. His eyes narrowing and his lips pulling into a hard line as he just stared back at me. It almost seemed that he was pissed that I said what I did. But I could never tell with Daryl. For all I knew this was his, you finally understand what I'm doing here look.
"What if I was? What are ye gonna do 'bout it?" Snapping at me, he quickly pulled a blade from the side of his pants. The one he kept at the ready if he couldn't use anything else.
It's not like I haven't had a blade pointed at me before, or had my life threatened. So I just let a inaudible chuckle leave my lips. As I did, I lent forward onto my knees letting the blade press against me. My eyes gazing right into Daryl's as I did so.
"Then do it. Kill me right now and end this." I wasn't thinking as I spoke. At this point I was letting my emotions that have been pent up for weeks out. "Do it!" I yelled. "Please.... Just do it." My voice was hoarse as it dropped. As I all but begged him to end my life.
Feeling tears rise in my eyes, I continued to plead with him. There was no hope left in my heart. There was nothing. Ever since this apocalypse started, I was pushed to my limits. Thrown into the pits and made to fight for my life over and over again. This last time however took all my fight out of me. I had nothing left to give and I just want it to end.
"I'd rather have you kill me, then the governor." Gripping onto his hand that was wrapped around the handle of the blade, I pushed it against my chest. Drawing some blood as I dug it into my skin. "I'm... I'm just tired of fighting."
We sat like this for what seemed like eternity. My breathing was ragged as I waited for him to make his move. To just end everything, right here and now.
My vision was blurry with my tears as I looked at him. His eyes full of apprehension as he stared back at me. But when nothing happened and I felt the knife drop to the ground I didn't know what to do.
"C'mere." He motioned for me to come over to him.
Being the stubborn, hardheaded person I am, I didn't go to him. Which only seemed to aggravate him even more. So instead of waiting for me he grabbed a hold of my wrist gently, drawing me close to him.
Letting my body lay against his, I immediately inhaled his familiar scent. He smelled like pine needles and musty dirt. A unappealing combination but one I've grown to appreciate.
"I ain't gonna hurt ye." He whispered as he pulled me closer to him. So I was now sitting in his lap, with my head resting against his shoulder.
"Not even if I wanted you to?" I asked, as I gripped onto Daryl shirt.
"Not even if ye wanted. Ye to damn important to me." This was out of character for Daryl, to be so open. Blatantly open, to the point where I didn't even have to search his face to know he was being truthful. But me being me, I completely over looked his words and went straight to the point.
"You don't have to say that Daryl." I shrugged slightly. "I know I'm not." He looked at me like I had five heads for saying that. It was true though, wasn't it?
"Do ye know what I've been through when ye was gone?" He asked, running a hand down his warn face. "Knowing ye left with that monster?" His eyes glared down into mine as he continued.
Keeping my mouth closed I just shook my head. Not wanting to interrupt him.
"I hated every damn second of it." Dropping his voice to a hush, I felt his hand gently trace along the wound on my face. "Knowin' ye left after what I told ye. That it coulda been the last time I ever saw ye?"
"It's fine, not like I didn't deserve it. Not like I didn't deserve any of what you said, cause I did." I spoke, as my hand gripped onto the bottom of his shirt more.
"It ain't fine." He snapped, causing me to pull back from him slightly. "Now you're hurt. Cause I gotta be some ass, an' treat ye like shit."
Laying back against his body, I let a smile slowly form. Seeing Daryl like this made me upset, especially with him blaming himself.
Rolling my eyes, I let a small laugh out. "I'm not that hurt, could have been worse." Smiling I held up my arm and slowly waved it around.
Narrowing his eyes at me, he took hold of my arm. The one that's wasn't in a sling. Turning it over I watched him tug at the tape that was keeping the gauze in place.
"What are you doing?" I asked, trying to pull my arm away from him. He didn't need to see what was underneath, I didn't even need to see it. But he didn't let go.
"Proving my damn point." Stopping what he was doing he looked up into my eyes and for that brief moment I could see how upset he was over this. So I just let him continue.
Turning his gaze away, his fingers went down and continued tugging on the tape. With one fluid motion he ripped the gauze away from my arm. Allowing the tape to pull at my skin as it released. Letting my eyes wandered down to my forearm, I stared at my shredded arm. My skin was bright red, and the muscle and tendons were exposed from where the walker had torn my flesh away.
It was worse then I had remembered but I suppose the shock of having a walker eat part of you kind of clouds your mind. But judging by Daryl's breathing he was just as shocked.
Moving his head he gazed up to me then back down to my arm. Before his fingers gently moved over my wound. As he did, I flexed my fingers causing my exposed muscles to contract and move about. Which was nauseating and extremely cool looking all at the same time.
"He flayed ye open?" Turning to me once again, he looked at me in disbelief.
"Not exactly." Sighing, I moved away from Daryl. Grabbing the blood soaked gauze that he still had in his hand.
Crawling back over to my side of the tent I repositioned the tap and covered my open wound back up. Defiantly don't need an infection, or anything now. I'm already going to be slow enough with my broken arm. I don't need something that could hinder me even more.
"Then tell me." His eyes narrowed at me as he searched my face for some unspoken answer. "For once in all the time I've known ye, just tell me the god damn truth."
Feeling my heart sink in my chest I gazed down at the tent floor. It hurt me to think that Daryl didn't believe that I was honest with him the whole time I knew him. I mean there were several things I didn't mention, but never once did I lie to him on purpose. It was all to protect him... And everyone here. Or maybe I just convinced myself I lied to protect him. That I really lied to protect myself. Either way I knew that I had to tell him what he wanted. Or I'd risk losing him again.
Finally, I looked back up at Daryl who was still intently watching me. His cat like eyes panning my face as I let out a sigh, and my hand run through my messy hair.
"The... The truth is Daryl, Is that man has done more things to me then a normal person can think of. Horror movie directors can't even compare with what's going on in that mans head. He's cut me, broke my bones, held guns to my head, let walkers try to eat me on numerous occasions and..." Just thinking of the next thing had my cheeks flushing red with embarrassment. I hardly ever admitted what he did to me to myself, let alone a guy, especially a guy like Daryl. But the governor already spilt that secret so what was the point in skipping it."He raped me."
Just saying it out loud solidified what actually happened in this last year. I never really had time to dwell on it to much, given the fact I was always running from house to house trying to survive another day. There was no time to feel sorry for yourself, you either moved on or died thinking about the past.
"Had..." He finally spoke addressing me. But when I looked up he had his fist balled at his sides. Clenching and unclenching his fingers as his eyes wandered my body.
"You wanted the truth, an that's the truth." I quietly whispered, raising my arm and gently wiping my eyes against the material of my shirt. "I can't change what happened Daryl, and I know you're still angry with me. But I just want you to know that I'm sorry. I'm sorry for calling you a traitor, I'm sorry for everything." Carefully getting to my feet, I hunched over in the tent.
Daryl was still sitting there with a his hands clenched. The whites of his knuckles clearly showing me how mad he was. The worst thing was I didn't know if he was mad at me still, or mad at the governor. Either way I decided to give him some space.
Reaching out my hand I quickly unzipped the tent and stepped outside onto the dirt. Giving one last glance in at Daryl.
"I'll keep out of your way then Daryl." Sighing, I gazed at the ground. "I know when I'm not wanted." His head snapped in my direction just as I finished zipping up the tent.
Leaving him there I wandered down into camp. Its when I realized that my tent was positioned several yards away from everyone else's. Safety precaution Im guessing. There was a small fire built and people were sitting around it talking quietly.
Letting my feet carry me closer, I held back my growing anxiety. It surprised me that I had this much, walking into a group of people. Old Hadley didn't give two shits what people thought, I was out for myself. But now I couldn't picture a life with out these people. They were my family, what mattered most to me.
"Hey Hadley." Carols voice woke me from my thoughts. She was sitting down on a log, with Beth and Maggie next to her.
"Hi." I gave a small smile as I hurried my way over to the last remaining spot to sit.
"You feeling better? I know when Merle brought you back with Rick last night, you looked pretty bad." Maggie asked, as he took a small object from Carols arms.
Raising my brow I racked my brain for a logical answer, as I let what Maggie said sink into my brain. Merle... Merle Dixon brought me back to camp? Yeah right. I must be hearing things.
"I'm fine, nothing that can't heal." Shrugging to them, I watched as Maggie focused her attention on the small thing in her arms. But I was still interested in this Merle business. "You said, that Merle brought me back?" I asked, hoping they'd clear up my confusion.
"I know, we were all pretty shocked too. But he went back for you last night. Found Rick struggling with you, and carried you back to camp." Carol added in as she rose to her feet.
That's when I heard a faint cry of a baby. My eyes snapped down to Maggie's arms where I saw a little arm reaching up.
"Lori had her baby?" I asked, leaning up hoping to get a glimpse. Completely dropping the Merle topic. But I couldn't see and I didn't feel like I'd be welcome with a newborn. So I just stayed put. "Where is she anyways?"
Between the three of them they all gave me a odd look, before turning their gaze on each other. Judging from their silence I knew it couldn't be anything good.
"Daryl didn't tell you?" Beth questioned as she gently rubbed her arms with her hands, trying to keep herself warm.
"Tell me what?"
"When the governor left, he let some walkers out of the tombs." Carol started, as she fixed a small bottle for the baby."We got over run fairly quickly and had to split up. Lori went into labor and... It had complications and Maggie ended up giving her a C-section right in the prison. She didn't make it." My heart plummeted through my chest, when I heard. I had just seen Lori that day and knowing I'd never see her again was mind numbing. "Carl had to shoot her, and Rick hasn't been the same since."
"Jesus." Letting my hand run over my eyes, I heaved a heavy breath. Carl? I couldn't imagine being his age and being forced to shoot my own mother.
But it also explains why Ricks eyes were red when I ran into him on my way out of Woodbury. He just lost his wife, and here I was blubbering on about something that happened to me. I felt like a complete jerk.
"The good thing is, is that Judith is healthy." Beth added in as she smiled down at the baby in her sisters arms.
"You mean lil' ass kicker." Carol gave a small chuckle, which caused the other two to laugh. Obviously I missed something, but I wasn't going to bother asking.
Standing to my feet again, I ran a hand through my hair. Trying my best to keep it somewhat tamed. The three of them didn't seem to notice me making my leave, which I was thankful for.
Again I let my feet carry me around camp. Darting in and out between the tents that were scattered around. I didn't really know what I was looking for, I was just trying to keep my mind occupied.
As I rounded the last tent, I noticed Merle sitting off by himself. He was leaning against a tree, a bottle of whiskey in his hand, as he stared out at the small creek ahead. Despite us not getting along, I still found myself walking towards him.
"What'd ye want?" He asked as I got closer. His eyes never even turning to look at me, so obviously he heard me approaching.
Not answering right away, I slowly sat down next to him. My eyes looking out at the water running by the both of us.
"I wanted to say thanks... For bringing me back."
"Ain't gotta thank me girl." He muttered, before taking a sip of whiskey. His arm then reaching out offering the bottle to me.
Just shaking my head, he retracted his arm. Bringing the bottle back up to his lips, where he took another swig.
"Well you didn't have to come back for me." I added, glancing up at him out of the corner of my eye.
"Damn right I didn't have to go back, save your sorry ass." He glared at me. His voice coming across almost as a chuckle.
"Then why did you?" Even though it was Merle I was talking to, I kept my tone pleasant. I didn't want him going all crazy at me.
"Damn girl, are ye stupid o' what?" He chuckled again, as he placed the bottle down. His body shifting so he could look at me properly. "O' do ye need somethin' to hit ye in that pretty little face of yours?"
Usually I would have had some remark or told Merle to shut it when he got like this. But I really had no idea what he was going on about. So he actually made a decent argument for once.
"I guess I am Merle." Agreeing with him, seemed to come to a surprise. Judging by the devilish smile forming on his rugged face.
He did a double take in my direction before taking another drink. The smile on his face dropping to a smirk as he almost gloated in this small victory of his.
"I ain't gone back for ye, because I wanted too." He said as he leaned back. "I gone back for ye, for my baby brother."
"For Daryl?" Questioning his explanation, I gazed up at him with a furrowed brow.
"Ye ain't had to see him, all torn up 'cause ye was gone. That ye was probably gonna die, and he could do nothin' 'bout it." Letting out a groan, he looked down at the now empty bottle. Turning his nose up, he quickly threw the bottle in the creek. We both sat in silence as it hit the water with a splash. "Ye know, I didn't know what he saw in ye to begin with. Some princess, who doesn't know her way 'round a weapon. Afraid to get dirty." Rolling my eyes he continued to rattle off flaws he thought I had.
"Is there a point to this?" I asked, getting slightly annoyed with his antics. Merle sure knew how to push your buttons, with out even trying very hard.
"Yeah there's a point!" He all but snapped at me. "When I found ye with officer friendly, and saw what ye did. I knew I had ye wrong. Ye ain't some princess, ye ain't afraid like all these city folks."
"You didn't think that when I kicked your sorry ass?" I let out a small chuckle, as I remember back to the day I threw Merle to the ground. It felt liberating to do so, but he didn't seem to happy.
"Ye got lucky." He scuffled, playing it off like it wasn't that big of a deal. "But you's alright. Good enough for my baby brother I guess."
When I heard that my eyes went wide with shock. Merle Dixon, biggest asshole, man who annoys that shit out of everyone just called me alright. I didn't want to show it and scare Merle into being a jerk again, but I was actually smiling inside.
"You're alright yourself Merle." Leaning over I patted his back, with my good arm.
He glared at me when I initially touched him. But a grin quickly pulled at his lips. It wasn't creepy like most times, it was just Merle being Merle.
"You'd make a good Dixon darlin' just don't let no one know your good old pal Merle said that to ye." Turning his gaze off me, he out stretched his arms in the air. "Now, get the hell outta here before one of them idiots sees us."
Rolling my eyes I didn't say another word to him as I pushed myself to my feet. Standing there I fixed my sling as I thought about what Merle said. Maybe he was really trying to be nice when he said that I'd make a good Dixon.
As I turned away and headed back towards the tents I let my mind wander again. What did Merle really mean by that? How could I even be a Dixon? Maybe he meant figuratively. Like if I was related to them by chance I'd do the family proud. But something told me that's not what Merle meant.
That man was a mystery just like his brother and there isn't enough time in the world to even begin to open him up. Not that I wanted too... It be like pandoras fucking box.
I didn't have time to question it anymore, when I felt a pair of hands lock around my waist. Figuring it wasn't a walker I didn't let out a scream as the person turned me around so I was facing them. Didn't want to freak any of the group out over nothing.
That's when my eyes landed on Daryl. He was busy pulling us into the tree line, out of the view of the others. Once we were a fair distance away he turned back and looked at me. His face illuminated in the sun light that was peaking through the tree tops. Showing me a glimpse into what he was truly thinking.
"Don't leave me again." He breathed out, almost as he was scolding me. His eyes softening as his fingers gripped tighter around my waist.
"Who said I was leaving?" I asked, my eyes staring up into his. Remembering earlier how hate filled his were.
"Ain't nobody said it. But ye always leave, something always makes ye leave Had." Shaking my head, I moved closer to him. Closing the small gap that was between us. "Last time it was me." I wouldn't have been able to hear that last part, if I hadn't moved closer to him.
Letting a sigh escape my lips, I gently placed my hand against the side of his face. My fingers running along his unshaven jaw.
"Believe me I'm not leaving anytime soon Dare." I gave a small smile, hoping to lighten his mood. "Don't see how I can." I let a laugh escape my lips, looking down at my current state.
"That ain't funny." Moving his head down so he was looking into my eyes. He searched my face for a couple minutes before I saw a tiny smile tug at his lips.
I was going to mention it, but I was stopped when he forcefully pressed me against a tree. His breathing labored as his hand came up and cupped my cheek. I could feel his hot breath against the skin of my face as he inched closer. His lips ever so lightly grazing against mine.
I couldn't wait any longer, I missed Daryl to much not to take this opportunity. So I forcefully pushed my lips against his. As soon as I did, he pushed me hard onto the tree causing the rough bark to dig into the skin of my back. But I could care less. My lips moved with his urgently as if this was the last kiss we'd ever share.
Judging by the low growls Daryl was letting out as his hands gently roamed my sides, he must have missed this too.
Pulling away slowly he rested his head against mine, as he held my body close to his. Our breathing was rushed as I looked into his eyes.
"I'm sorry Had." He whispered as he moved his head against my neck. "Ye gotta know I didn't mean none of what I said." His voice was low and hungry as he spoke.
"I know Daryl." Keeping my voice low, I pulled him closer to my body. Holding onto him, not letting go for anything. "It's over now."
When I said that, he pulled away so he could look at me. His eyes completely serious as he searched my face again.
"It ain't over till we know he's dead." Daryl spoke, being blunt as usual. But that's what I loved about him, he never sugar coated anything. "But I ain't letting him have ye this time."
I didn't give him time to say anything else, cause I pressed my lips against his hungrily. His hands slid under my shirt, causing me to shiver as his calloused fingers trailed my skin. Growling low he kissed me faster, forcing my mouth open so our tongues could meet. Closing my eyes, my lips followed his as I tried to push off the growing fear that maybe the governor wasn't dead.
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Hope you guys enjoyed this chapter!!! Plus I felt like we all needed a bit of Merle in this after last weeks episode. Well Rick lost Lori do you think Shane or Daryl will be stepping up as a leader?? Do did you think Merle meant by Had making a Dixon? Is Daryl still angry??? Please tell me what you guys are thinking cause I love the feed back!!