Saul arrives at seven on the dot, yet even though I'd told him to be there at that time, I still don't quite feel ready. And that's even considering the fact that I chose my outfit without having to try on a dozen different options, not needing to check and recheck how I looked in the mirror. A new feeling for me to be honest, although it definitely helps that I'm not trying to sleep with Saul.
No, the thing that is making me feel antsy is that I've never let anyone into my home before. At the pack I always had people over, friends from school, aunts, uncles, cousins. Even potential suitors. But it was always our home. With my family. Never my home where I might worry that it wasn't enough, that I might be judged for how I had chosen to live.
I'm understandably hesitant as I open the door, but the big smile on Saul's face, and the two large bottles of wine in his hands, instantly make me feel better. As a way of greeting, he brandishes the two bottles up high in the air.
"Ta-da!" I laugh, shaking my head at his childishness as I usher him in. He always has a way of making me laugh, of making me feel better despite everything going on. I show him to one of the bar stools as I quickly put the finishing touches on the food. It needs about another half an hour in the oven so I get out the snacks I have prepared; some spring rolls and panara alongside a homemade dip.
"I have some news for you, Rey." He chatters away as he pours the wine, completely filling the already very large glasses that I gave him.
"I have some news for you too!" I grin at him as I take a sip from my glass, hoping to disguise my ongoing anxiety about sharing my current situation. I'm not even sure what kind of situation it is. A dating situation? A sexual situation? A weird friend situation?
"Oooh ok, spill girl." I shake my head, still not fully comfortable enough to gossip. I am definitely going to need some more alcohol before that happens.
"Nope, you first!" I nudge him playfully as I get up from the bar stool to check on the food in the oven.
"Well, remember when you saw me in Ktukda last night and I was rushing off somewhere? Well my Alpha, Sam, has potentially managed to convince some of the elders of the werewolf community to start to consider the gay community as a valid identity as a werewolf." He shakes his head, awe visible on his face. "Honestly what that girl can't do is a mystery..."
"Wait, Sam is a girl? Your Alpha is a girl... I didn't... didn't think that was possible..." I trail off, falling silent as I realise what the possibilities of this might suggest. I'd always assumed that to maintain my Alpha power and identity, I would be forced to mate with a male Alpha. But if I can become an Alpha in my own right? Although would it mean giving up...
"Is she mated?" I abruptly interrupt Saul who was attempting to explain his whole pack situation. Not that it didn't sound interested, but I'm now so intrigued by this possibility. I just wouldn't be able to do it if it meant being alone forever. I may enjoy sex and sleeping around, but I know that I would never want to be alone. Life is something that should be shared.
"Yes, my Alpha is mated. She has two mates actually."
"Two?" Once again I interrupt Saul's explanation. I just can't quite get my head around this apparently incredible female.
"Yes, one is male and one is gender neutral. We probably have the entirety of the LGBTQIA acronym within our pack..." He chuckles at his little joke, the expression on his face suggesting maybe he wants me to ask more. But I'm too astounded at what he has had.
"What is 'gender neutral'?" I've heard the term before, but never really thought to discover what it truly meant.
"It means someone who feels neither feminine and masculine. Some identify as something in between, some identify as a mixture, some identify as neither. Tay I think identifies as a mixture. Whereas I identify as a trans man." He says the last statement so matter of fact it's as if he hardly wants me to notice it. But when I glance up at his face in shock, his expression suggests otherwise. He must have been keeping this secret for so long, wanting to share but afraid to do so. Suddenly something clicks into place in my head
"Oh my god Saul, so when I said you were just being a 'typical man' at our dinner... fuck, I'm so sorry." It all makes sense to me now, why he was so offended after our time together, why he'd walked away, leaving me in the rain. I'd really hit a nerve with my comment, and probably with my general behaviour throughout the dinner.
"That's ok, to be honest, I really thought you knew, otherwise I wouldn't have been so offended. I thought everyone knew really, hence the attitudes towards me. But I think you've been away from all the werewolf politics that you must never have heard about the huge scandal I generated when I came out."
I reach out, gripping Saul's hands tightly. As if I could convey the depth of my apology through telepathy, I look deeply into his eyes, my own threatening tears. I can't even begin to imagine what he must have gone through. I may not know much about this world, but I can imagine how scared and stressed even I would feel about coming out. Saul must have been terrified.
"I can't imagine how difficult that must have been for you. I'm really glad that it sounds like you've got a good supportive pack." I don't miss the dark look that flickers across Saul's face.
"I do now." He shakes his head, visibly pushing the dark thoughts into the back of his mind. "I really do, they're great. And everything Sam is doing for us... You should meet her, she's incredible." I fall silent at that, wondering what it would be like to meet someone who is that confident, that self-assured. Saul similarly falls silent, and I can't help but wonder if he's thinking back to a time when his pack was much less supportive. Maybe the two of us have more in common than I realised.
The knock at the door is loud. Sharp and sudden, it jolts both me and Saul from our contemplative silence. I frown, glancing at my phone to check to the time. Not that anyone ever visits me at any time, but eight at night seems like a very odd time for anyone to be knocking.
"It must be the neighbors!" I call out over my shoulder as I rush down the corridor. Outside is pure darkness and it takes a second for my eyes to adjust to the gloom. Two silhouettes stand at my front door. Both broad and tall, they make for a menacing apparition in the dark. Then I catch a glance of the faces that had been well hidden underneath strategically placed baseball caps and my heart plummets in my chest, the menace now very real.
I back up into the house, making a feeble attempt to close the door as I do, which the man on the right stops with his foot.
"Rodrigo..." The name is barely a whisper out of my mouth, yet it contains every ounce of fear and hatred that I have ever felt for the man standing before me. I sense Aida within me growling loudly, and I allow her anger to fuel my confidence.
"I don't know why you're here, but you are not welcome." I stand solidly in my corridor, blocking their entrance into the rest of my home, the rest of my life. Arms crossed over my chest, I force myself to stand tall in the face of the man who ruined my life.
"I suggest you leave." Aida's low growl escapes in my words, her Alpha authority seeping into the tone. I hide a smirk when both bulky men take a small step back.
"Now now, Reyna. That's not a way to treat a guest." Rodrigo has the audacity to tut at me, but it's effect is slightly reduced by the fact that he's now standing outside again.
"As if you would know how to treat anyone." Saul pipes up from behind me, having moved from the kitchen when I didn't reappear. I glance back, chuckling as I spot his stance. He's leaning against the wall, hair perfectly styled into a neat sweep as he picks at his nails, his demeanor suggesting that he is neither scared nor challenged by the two wolves at the door. Rodrigo's wolf growls and the dickhead dares to take a step back into my home.
"Is this the kind of company you keep now, Reyna?" He draws out every syllable in my name, pushing as much venom into his tone as he can. "Guess I was right to get right of you when I did."
I allow my eyes to flash red, the colour of an Alpha, and push my aura of dominance out a little more. He's not fucking welcome in my home. Although I guess this confirms Saul's theory that everyone knows about him.
"Did you come here looking for a fight? Or did you have an actual logical reason for coming to see me?" I roll my eyes at Saul as I say that last bit, emphasising that the likelihood of him having had any logical thought ever in his life is a very minute possibility.
"Actually... yes." Rodrigo seems to deflate at his companion's admission. "We came to give you this." He extends a small piece of paper towards me, one that Rodrigo seems desperate not to look at.
Hesitantly I reach out to grab it, immediately stepping back a few feet to give myself some semblance of safety. I unfold it slowly, stealing myself for whatever this may be. But luckily Lina has prepared me for what's written on the tiny sheet.
"You are cordially invited to the wedding of Rodrigo Gonzalez and Isabella Montgomery which will be held on the 28th June. Please RSVP below. We look forward to seeing many of our friends and family at our special day."
"Although just to confirm." The cocky smirk on Rodrigo's face spreads across his face. "For you Reyna, that isn't an invitation. It's an order. You WILL be there." Rodrigo's self-contented little smile as he orders me around makes me want to smack the smugness off his face. He turns to leave as if he'd never expect me to reply, but then instantly looks back over his shoulder.
"Oh and, Reyna. You better not bring her." He flicks his chin in Saul's general direction who instantly tenses beside me. It's the final straw that pushes me over the edge. And as I move forward to defend my friend, not a single whisper of my fear remains.
Rodrigo never sees the punch coming, my right hook hitting him square in the jaw as I force all of my strength through the arm. In my fingers, I feel the crack of his bone, the instant dark pleasure coursing through me as I finally give back as good as I got. But I don't allow the anger to take over. I'm definitely capable of leaping onto his body and pounding him in a way that reminds him of every piece of abuse I ever suffered. But I don't. I'm nothing like him.
"I suggest you leave Rodrigo. Now. And I can promise wholeheartedly that neither me nor Saul will be attending your wedding." And with that, I slam the door in his face, hard enough that the wall rattles in protest.