[The episode begins with Vaggie and Charlie in their room. Charlie is packing clothes into a suitcase while Vaggie sits on the bed, looking troubled because Charlie is overpacking a lot of things to the point she has a closet-sized suitcase, a guitar case, two extra large suitcase luggage, and a small handbag. The siblings are only suing two small backpacks.]
Charlie: Ok, I have my warm weather clothes and my cold weather clothes. I have a light jacket, flak jacket and rain jacket- wait, does it rain in Heaven?
Vaggie: Charlie, you're only going to heaven for a few hours.
[Charlie stands up and paces a bit.]
Charlie: Vaggie, we are only going to heaven for a day. And I just want to be prepared! It's our last chance to convince heaven a soul can be redeemed.
Sable: But isn't a bit too much? Look at me I'm just taking some essentials.
[He points to his backpack but then Cereza extends his hand.]
Cereza: Give me the gun.
Sable: Son of a bitch. (Gives the gun to Cereza)
Charlie: I just want to be prepared, (To Vaggie) are you ready?
Vaggie: Yeah, I wish I could come, sweetie, but I have that...thing.
Charlie: What thing?
Vaggie: The thing with the.. thing uhm.. fuck, gah, I'm such a bad liar.
[Charlie takes Vaggie's hand.]
Charlie: Vaggie, you're my partner, I need you there with me.
Vaggie: (sighs) Fine.
Charlie: Yes!!
[Charlie hugs and kisses Vaggie's cheek. The scene then changes to the main hotel room, as stumbles into the lounge with exhaustion.]
Angel Dust: Oh, fuck.
[Niffty pokes her head out of a plant pot with a feather duster before coming down to see him.]
Niffty: You look messy! What happened to you?
Angel Dust: It's who happened to me, and the answer is everyone! Twice. Val had me working 16 hours straight on a fucking whim. The absolute dickbag. UGH!
[While Angel is explaining this, he pulls his hands back to straighten his backside with crackles of bone being popped. He collapses on the couch to rest or sleep for the night. Charlie and Vaggie come into the scene with Vaggie holding two luggage suitcase with all of a sudden, the wall explodes, freaking Angel out of the couch. Angel gets annoyed that it's the second or third time the same wall that was fixed was blown up again.]
Angel Dust: Argh! What the fuck is with that wall?!
[An appears from the red smoke in the now-destroyed hole on the wall, holding a bomb in her hands.]
Cherri Bomb: What up hoes? (laughs)
[Angel Dust hears the laughter and immediately gets up from the couch with excitement.]
Angel Dust: Holy shit! Cherri Bomb? Long time no see, baby!
[Cherri jumps into the room.]
Cherri Bomb: Angie, ya bitch! You been texting me depressin' shit all day! Figured we could tear shit up like old times. It's been fucking forever!
[Cherri senses Charlie coming up behind her and gives the bomb to Charlie.]
Cherri Bomb: Here, hold this.
[Charlie freaks out and plays hot potato with the bomb.]
Charlie: Ah! Oh my god! Oh my god!
[Charlie tosses the bomb back and forth in her hands until Sable takes it.]
Sable: GRANADE!
[Sable jumps on it waiting for the explosion, Vaggie then kicks Sable away.]
Vaggie: Nope, gimme that.
[Vaggie throws the bomb out of the oh-so broken wall and said bomb explodes 'safely'.]
Angel Dust: I love seein' ya Cherri, but I'm too tired. I need to pass out.
[Angel tries falling back down onto the couch, but Cherri catches and pulls him up.]
Cherri Bomb: You can sleep when you're double dead, fuckhead! Come on, what you really need is a recharge! A reinvigoration, a re—
Charlie: Responsible night on the town! That is a great idea! Hi! (shakes Cherri's hand) Charlie! That's my wall that you just blew up. It's so nice to meet one of Angel's friends! Agh! He never brings anyone around.
Cherri Bomb: (snorts) Wonder why.
Charlie: (obliviously) Yeah, me too. Anyway, Angel and everyone else have been working so hard, I think they deserve to have a little fun.
Cherri Bomb: W-w-wait, they?
[Charlie waves over to Husk and Niffty. Husk doesn't seem to care much, but Niffty is shaking so fast that shaking rattling sounds can be heard from her body.]
Charlie: Yeah! Hi, everyone! Angel and his friend are taking you all out for a night of fun and relaxation!
[Cherri mistakes Charlie's suggestion and tries to make her understand.]
Cherri Bomb: Wait, I'm only here for Angel and an old fri—
[Charlie hands Cherri Bomb a large stack of money.]
Cherri Bomb: —Ooh! Never mind, Let's GO!
Charlie: Make sure they have the best time tonight! Anyway, the portal to Heaven should be opening right about...
[Just as Charlie predicted, the portal to Heaven opens in the middle of the lounge.]
Charlie: (Screams with delight) Now!
[Charlie grabs Vaggie with both arms and throws her into the portal with th siblling following soon behind, and as she steps a foot inside, she turns back to the guests and workers with Cherri Bomb, waving them goodbye for the day.]
Charlie: Bye!!
[Charlie enters the portal and vanishes on the spot just before walks by with a drink in his mouth. He notices Cherri Bomb and spits out his drink in shock]
Sir Pentious: Well! If it isn't my arch-nemesis! Have you come to meet your fate in battle, Cherri Bomb?
[Sir Pentious doesn't notice one of Charlie's discarded luggage in his way and ends up tripping over while Cherri Bomb doesn't seem to mind about him.]
Cherri Bomb: Apparently, I'm going out with Angel and I gotta drag your sorry asses along.
{Cherri Bomb takes out a piece of gum and starts chewing. Sir Pentious hears her well, and is flustered by Cherri's suggestion. He immediately goes over to her and seemed nervous while Cherri faces him and blows a bubble.]
Sir Pentious: Oh, oh, you and me are going out like for fun? I... I didn't think this would ever happen. (panicked) What-What do I do? What-What do I wear?
[Sir Pentious grabs Cherri's shoulder for suggestion, but she doesn't like Sir Pentious touching her and grabs his claw to the point it seemed like she's crushing it.]
Cherri Bomb: Don't fuckin' touch me, ya munted dickhead.
[And with that, Cherri leaves behind the flustering Sir Pentious who is blushing red after Cherri touched his hand. The scene cuts right into the golden gates of Heaven where Charlie, Vaggie, Cereza and Sable are shown to be outside as the portal closes behind them.]
Charlie: Vaggie, look at this place! It's so clean! Isn't that amazing?
Vaggie: (sarcastically) Yup, super cool. Heaven. Wow.
Sable: Too bright for my liking. (Puts on shades.)
[The shades glow purple before breaking in two.]
Sable: Hey!
Cereza: Have some freaking decency Sable.
Sable: But I just- Did you just said "freaking"?
Cereza: Duh, we are in Heaven we need to watch our language.
Charlie: Great idea Cereza!
[They approach the front desk where St. Peter pops up from behind his desk.}
St. Peter: Hiya! Welcome to Heaven! Can I get your name please?
Charlie: Oh! Uhm, uh, Charlie Morningstar!
[Peter opens the book of reservations that are supposed to be a list of names they've cataloging for those who are to enter heaven.]
St. Peter: Charlie Morningstar, hmm, (mumbling names from list) I'm not seeing you on my list here, that's so odd.
Charlie: Uh, uhm, my dad got me this meeting, so maybe...
St. Peter: Oh, Dad! Okay!
Charlie: Try Lucifer... Morning... star?
[Peter realizes who Lucifer is.]
St. Peter: Oh, fuck! (nervously) Yeah, hoooo, hehe. Yikes, am I right? Are you sure you're in the right place? Because I think you might be a little lost.
[Peter nervously flies down from the desk to them. Vaggie is unamused of St. Peter, crossing her arms in disappointment.]
Vaggie: Oh, here we go.
Charlie: No, uh... we're, we're here for a meeting.
[Just then, high above the three of them, Sera and Emily suddenly appear in their angelic forms before turning into their humanoid forms as they land in front of them. sable being particulary curious of Emily.]
Sera: St. Peter. We can take it from here. Greetings, daughter of the Morningstar. I am Sera, the high seraphim of heaven. You are gifted to be here.
[The other angel, Emily, is super-excited to see outsiders from Heaven that she squeals and comes forward to greet them.]
Emily: (squeals) Hi! I'm Emily, the other seraphim, though you can call me Em! Emmy, E, whatever you want, I go by whatever. (giggles) Welcome to Heaven!
Cereza: That was so sweet I think I got diabetes.
Sable: Oh come that was kind of awesome.
[They run hurriedly, unexpectedly passing , Adam who is drinking a soda, and Lute. They both immediately pause as they seeing them.]
Adam: Holy fucking shit balls, am I seeing who I think I'm seeing?
Lute: What is she doing here? How did she even get up here?
Adam: Who cares? I'm handling this shit right now.
[Adam goes to challenge Charlie and Vaggie, but Lute stops him.]
Lute: Wait! You want to start a fight on the promenade in front of everyone?
Adam: Better than waiting for the fucking extermination!
[Lute immediately grabs Adam by his collar and pulls him to shush him harshly.]
Lute: SHHH. Sir, what was the Seraphim's one rule?
Adam: Uuughhh, "No one but the exorcists can know about the exterminations". I know fine.(slurps drink) Don't fucking shush me, bitch.
[Just before they can settle this, Sera suddenly appears behind them both, teleporting them to an office-like building with just one sway of her wings. The light goes white on the screen before reappearing to show Adam and Lute being confronted by a stern Sera.]
Sera: You should listen to your lieutenant, Adam.
[Adam turns around and looks at Sera with shock.]
Adam: Fuck! Sera! You can't sneak up on a guy like that, jeez.
Lute: Your highness, forgive me, but what are the hell-spawn doing here?
Sera: Well, you failed to control the demons' unrest, and now Lucifer is involved, setting up an audience for his misguided daughter. I never would have agreed to your...(Adam slurps his soda drink) 'yearly activities' if I thought it would bring trouble to our doorstep. Keeping Heaven safe was my only reason for allowing it. Even sacrificed a great friendship for it.
Adam: What do you want from me? I'm just one guy. Besides that asshole was always wasting Heaven's time with his bullshit.
Sera: Do not call him that. I want you to do whatever you need to do to keep this problem from getting any worse. Are we clear?
Adam: Yeah. Got it.
[Vaggie and Charlie are shown in their hotel room, Vaggie putting their big tons of luggage down as Charlie sits on the bed excitedly.]
Charlie: Okay, I love Heaven! Vaggie, did you see the ice cream shop? They had sprinkles made of rainbows!
Vaggie: Those are just rainbow sprinkles.
Cereza: Hey it beats whatever we have for ice cream in hell.
Charlie: (stands up excitedly) Emily's going to take us to a zoo where all the animals are actually soft! You coming?
Vaggie: Uh, I need a break. But hug a koala for me.
Charlie: O.M.G! Can you imagine an actual koala? (squeals happily) see you later!
[Charlie zips right out of the door with the siblings following quickly behind, leaving Vaggie alone for herself. She lays on the bed and sighs, but there is a knock on the door a second later. She answers it, revealing Adam, barging right in to greet her.]
Adam: Hey there Vag-asaurus!
Vaggie: Charlie will be back soon, you need to get out now.
[Adam enters the room, Lute behind him]
Adam: I'm not looking for the blonde, babe. I'm looking for you.
Vaggie: Why?
Adam: Maybe 'cuz you left the band; you tried for a solo career, or I guess it's more of a... duet!
Vaggie: I don't know what you're talking about.
Adam: Do you really think I wouldn't recognize one of my top girls just cuz you're out of uniform?
[Vaggie immediately grows pale when she realizes how Adam has never forgotten her. A flashback cuts to show a past extermination. Exorcists come flying down with swords and spears as they hunt and kill every Sinner they find. Screams can be heard as many demons are being massacred by the Angels. An Exorcist flies down and kills a demon, before taking her helmet off, revealing it to be Vaggie with a shorter hair.]
Adam: (voiceover) You were on the front lines, I wouldn't forget a bad bitch like you.
[The flashback cuts to Vaggie blocking the Katana of the Crimson Knight, they fight for a bit until she manages to knock him back before she retreats back to Heaven. She notices that her hand has a huge gash on it.]
Adam: (Voiceover) You even survived the Crimson Knight! It's why I named you after the best thing ever. Vaggie.
[Cuts back to the present with the annoyed Vaggie.]
Vaggie: Actually, it's pronounced Vaggie.
Adam: Hmmmmm- no. Anyway, you sure fucked up, didn't you?
[Cuts to a flashback of the Extermination. As Exorcists kills a demon, a sinner child is running away while being chased by a vicious Vaggie as an Exorcist. The child runs into an alleyway where he reaches a dead end. He turns, and starts crying where he is prepared to meet his demise. However, Vaggie hesitates, seeing the innocent child right before her eyes crying in fear. She reconsiders her decision.]
Vaggie: (whispering) Go, run. Now!
[The sinner child flees from Vaggie right before Lute's shadow appears behind her. Vaggie realizes she has been spotted before Lute stabs her eye out. Vaggie screams in pain. Her eye falls before Lute steps on it. She steps on Vaggie.
Lute: Sinful filth like you has no place in Heaven.
[Lute brings up Vaggie's head and rips her wings off. Vaggie pants as she watched Adam appear before her in a shadow silhouette before Lute throws her discarded wings away and sword before she and Adam leave. Vaggie is disoriented until she see a large figure in front of her.]
Vaggie: Its you. Came here to finish the job?
[She looks at the Knights weapons dripping with angelic blood. ]
Vaggie: What are you waiting for?! Do it!
[The Knight just kneels in front of her.]
Crimson Knight: (Distorted) You showed mercy. Your blood doesn't need to be spilled. You demonstrated that you are better than the rest.
[The Crimson Knight leaves and the scene then changes to Vaggie stumbling down an alleyway, now with only one eye. She collapses against a dumpster, before Charlie, in the past, spots her. She puts a bandage over her missing eye, and Vaggie smiles. In return, Charlie smiles back.]
[The scene transitions to an angelic courtroom, where Charlie and Vaggie are sat down. Adam walks by on his way to his seat with Lute.]
Charlie: Oh no, not him again!
[Adam flies up and sits down beside Lute.}
Adam: What up, baby? Saw that you went to my manager. Low blow, Karen.
[Cereza leans over Charlie.]
Cereza: Now I see why you call him an asshole.
Sera: We are gathered here today to determine whether or not a soul in Hell can be redeemed into the heavenly realm via means of this "Hazbin Hotel". Princess Morningstar?
Charlie: (sigh) Thank you, Seraphim. (clears throat) Webster's dictionary defines redemption as-
Adam: Objection, lame and unoriginal.
Sera: Sustained. No further dictionary references please.
Charlie: Right, ok, uh, uh... uhhmmmm...
[Charlie shuffles through multiple cards, all which have various dictionary references on.]
Cereza: (Whispering) I told you not to overdo the dictionary references!
Charlie: (Whispering) I'm sorry! I wanted to sound serious!
Adam: If you have actual evidence, then show it already.
Lute: She doesn't need to, it's a clear and cut case. There's absolutely no way a soul could be redeemed.
[Many court members mumble in agreement, Charlie is getting more nervous before Sable remembers what his father said.]
Sable: What about Purgatorio then?
[Adam and Lute looks shocked after hearing that name, Sera has a pained expression in her face.]
Adam: Shit!
Emily: What's Purgatorio?
Sera: (Pained) Purgatorio...was a place where...a soul could be redeemed. An old friend used to rule it.
Charlie/Emily: What?!
Cereza: If you knew about this then why didn't you agree with Charlie's plan?!
Charlie: If he is here maybe he could explain why a soul deserves to be redeemed!
Sera: He was exiled a few years ago due to heresy.
Charlie: Why?!
[Before Sera could answer she is interrupted by Adam.]
Adam: Because that edgy asshole with that bimbo partner of his betrayed Heaven! Stole a precious artefact of us and made us look like fucking idiots!
Lute: Not only that but Purgatorio at least knew how to choose who to redeem! Ms Bleed heart over here just thinks everyone should have a chance. Besides after his exile his rules don't apply anymore.
Sable: But there is evidence that a soul could technically be redeemed right?
Adam: Technically yes but-
Cereza: Then Charlie's idea could technically work. There is a case here.
[The court members start mumbling again. Adam just growls in anger.]
Charlie: Exactly! We have a patron right now who is making incredible progress!
Adam: Who?
Charlie: Angel Dust.
Adam: Oh yeah, the porn demon. He's totally worth being redeemed. (blows raspberry)
Charlie: Well, if you are in charge now, what do you think it takes to get into Heaven?
Adam: Uhmm... w-well... Uhh...
Sera: Is everything ok, Adam?
Adam: Give me a fucking minute, ok? (mutters)
[Adam scrawls something down on a golden piece of paper, before teleporting it over to Vaggie.]
Vaggie: (reading list) "Act selfless, don't steal, stick it to the man". Are you fucking serious?
Adam: Uh, yeah. Sure got me here, didn't it? (laughs nervously) Right, Sera?
Sera: He was the first human soul in Heaven...
Sable: (Muttering) That itself was a miracle....
Charlie: Well, I bet Angel is doing all of those things right now!
Adam: Then let's fucking see it bruh! (snaps fingers)
[A spying orb appears in the middle of the courtroom.]
Charlie: Your honor, may I present: exhibit A.
[Scene transitions to the nightclub Angel dust and co. are at]
Cherri Bomb: Woo! Isn't this place the fucking best?
Husk: I'll admit, "Consent" is a good name for a sex club.
Sir Pentious: Niffty, dear, what are you doing?
Niffty: I'm sweeping! Ugh, look how icky it is in here!
Sir Pentious: That's because we're at a club, dear.
Niffty: Oh! I thought the hotel looked different! (giggles)
Angel Dust: Hey didn't you say your friend is was gonna see us here?
Cherri Bomb: Yeah, ugh he always late for this shit.
???: I'm just five minutes late, calm your tits Cherri.
[Back to Heaven both Sable and Cereza widen their eyes.]
Cereza: Please tell me that isn't...
Sable: I'm afraid it is.
[It's revealed that Cherri Bomb's friend was no other than their sibling Hound. Emily looks at Sable and Cereza confused.]
Sable: We are triplets...
Emily: Oh.
[Back at the place Hound and Cherri bump fists.]
Cherri: Hound! Fucking finally! I thought that girlfriend of yours was keeping you busy all times. (Wiggles eyebrow)
Hound: Don't start Cherri, I already had to deal with a hitman cowboy and conspiracy theorists. I came here to relax. (Notices the gang) Who are the new faces?
Husk: Heh. If it isn't the black sheep.
Nifty: Another fluffy boy! Can I cut your hair?
Pentious: (Gasp) Another Sable?!
Angel Dust: Damn, Cereza was right, you do look like a douchebag.
Hound: So you all know Sable and Cereza? Well that immediately makes me hate you, see ya Cherri.
[Hound starts to leave but Cherri grabs him by the jacket and yanks him back to a seat.]
Cherri: Stop whining you fucking dick! You asked me to hang out then fucking deal with it.
Hound: (Sighs) Fine...
[Sir Pentious leans over to Cherri Bomb.]
Sir Pentious: Ms. Bomb, I-I'd like to buy you a drink.
Cherri Bomb: Why? Didn't you say we're arch rivals?
Sir Pentious: Uhm... uhh... because I'm buying everyone a drink!
Crowd: Free drinks! I love alcohol!
Angel Dust: Good, I need a drink after today. You know, Val, he's into this waterboarding shit now, I don't know, it's a kink.
Hound: Eugh! You work for Valentino?
Angel Dust: Unfortunately.
Cherri Bomb: What are you complaining about? If I remember correctly you used to work for someone similar.
[Everyone at the bar looks at Hound surprised and curious. He just rolls his eyes in annoyance.]
Angel Dust: You are a porn star too?
Hound: No. I was the bodyguard of someone who you could say was in the sex industry, but there are two big differences Cherri. One, he thinks of sex as an art not something to exploit others for profit and two, he isn't a rapist!
Angel Dust: Heh, now it makes me want to work for him instead of Val.
Cherri Bomb: Angel, enough with the Val talk. He already ruined your whole day, don't let him ruin your night too. (holds out three pills) Here, take one of these and you won't be worrying about nothing.
Hound: Where did you get these? These are straight from Sloth.
Cherri Bomb: My dealer upped his stuff. This is some real shit I got here.
Husk: Here we go.
Cherri Bomb: Oh look! The drunk sobered up long enough to judge us.
Husk: I ain't the one trying to get into Heaven. Look, you want to fuck up all your progress? Be my guest. I just... (sighs) I just thought you were better than that.
Cherri Bomb: Thanks, Captain Buzzkill. Come on, Angie, let's get fucked up! It's been too long!
Angel Dust: I uhh... I don't know, it's been a long night and I don't need to go too wild.
Husk: (approvingly) Hmm.
Cherri Bomb: Come on, bitch. If you've really been working that hard, you deserve a little R and R, some THC, or maybe PCP with DMT. Aw, fuck it, let's see where the night takes us, huh?
[Sir Pentious slithers back into frame.]
Angel Dust: I.. I guess?
Sir Pentious: Cherri, I bought you a shot. B-because I bought everyone another shot! Hooray! (chuckles)
Crowd: Yeah! Another drink! I love alcohol!
Angel Dust: (drinks shot) Ah... Fuck it, let's do it.
Husk: (sighs)
[Transitions back to the courtroom.]
Adam: Heavenly people, what more do you need to see? The porn star chose a night of debauchery. That's not a soul worthy of being in Heaven!
Charlie: Uhm, objection! Are you really telling me you've never had a drink with friends at the end of a hard day?
Adam: Uh, we don't have hard days? It's fucking Heaven, bitch. You seriously gonna sit there and pretend like this behavior is ok?
Charlie: (growls)
Cereza: Objection! What about wine then?
Adam: Bullshit! That doesn't have anything to do with this.
Sera: Sustained, she does have a point Adam.
Adam: Uh trick question mutt, unaltered wine won't even get you tipsy, trust me I was the first one to try it.
Sable: But it's still alcohol isn't it?
Adam: (to Vaggie, with malicious intent) I don't know, Vaggie? What do you think?
Vaggie: I-I- I have to go the bathroom!
[Vaggie rushes out of the courtroom.]
Charlie: What? Vaggie, can you hold it?! (frustrated groan) Angel will make good decisions, come on! We have to keep watching! Please?
Sera: (sighs) Yeah, I don't know.
Emily: Yeah, let's give him a chance.
Sera: Very well, the court will allow it.
Charlie: Fuck, yes! I mean... heh... thank you.
[The scene transitions back to the club, where the gang have had multiple drinks.]
Cherri Bomb: Round 12, motherfuckers! Heels are coming off!
Hound: I'm just getting fucking started Cherri!
Angel Dust: Ho ho yeah! Keep 'em comin'! Come on, right here! Come right here to daddy.
Sir Pentious: Oh, it's wonderful to have friends! (chuckles)
Niffty: Everything's spinny! (giggles)
Angel Dust: Ha, I think you're done, tiny.
Niffty: No! Gimme gimme gimme!
Hound: Hah! The little gremlin is thirsty for more!
Cherri Bomb: Oh come on, bitch! She can handle a little more!
Angel Dust: She's like 10 pounds soaking wet and— oh shit, where'd she go?
[Niffty is shoving other patrons' drinks into a sack.]
Guys at a table: Hey! Fuck!
Niffty: Dirty, dirty! Make it clean!
Angel Dust: Damn it, Niffty. Sorry fellas, here, next one's on me. Niffty? Shit!
[Niffty's digging through a supply closet.]
Niffty: Chlorine... Bleach...
Cherri Bomb: Angie, the fuck you doin'? You're supposed to be relaxin', not playin' nanny!
Angel Dust: Look she ain't used to this scene, I-I just dont want her to end up in the gutter like I used to.
Cherri Bomb: Pfft, WHATEVER, NERD, just catch up when you're done!
Niffty: (laughing)
[Angel picks Niffty up.]
Angel Dust: STOP!! You can't take tha- GOD, Niff, why you bein' such a mess?!
Niffty: I'm the mess...? (Niffty starts crying)
Angel Dust: Oh, oh shit! Hey hey, Hey calm down. (Take deep breaths) It's fine. Shh.. Hey, you wanna play with the kitty?
Niffty: (stops crying) yeah...
[Angel puts Niffty on Husk's head while she giggles about it.]
Husk: The fuck is this?
Angel Dust: She's wasted, just go with it.
Hound: Oh that's adorable.
Husk: Really? (Sees Niffty playing with his ears and wings) Ugh, get the...
[Scene changes to Sir Pentious falling off hiss eat and slithering over to Cherri Bomb.]
Sir Pentious: Ahh... HEY, WOW!!!! Hey, so... I see the club has a sex room, so I was thinking, maybe you'd want to, uhmm... do a... sssSEX with me?
Cherri: (snort) I'm sorry, why would we have sex?
Sir Pentious: Uh... uhm... because I'm having sex with everyone here! (laughs briefly before being grabbed)
[Crowd cheers, before dragging Sir Pentious towards the 'sex room'. Many sets of eyes are visible inside]
Sir Pentious: Wait! (screams)
Cherri: You know, we can do this fucking shit every fuckin' night! You don't have to spend all your off hours "working on yourself", you little bitch.
Husk: The hotel isn't a problem in his life, it's—
Angel Dust: Valentino.
Husk: Exactly. So why don't you-
Angel Dust: No, Valentino.
Hound: (Spits drink) What?!
[Camera pans to Valentino at a large sofa-bench talking with some female demons]
Valentino: Yeah, I'm here all the time, they know me. You're gorgeous, do you need a job? How many dicks can you suck? I could make you a star...
Angel Dust: Let's get the fuck out of here, okay? ...Where's Niffty?
Valentino: OK, yeah, bring me another drink or I'll fucking kill you.
[Niffty is seen running towards Valentino]
Niffty: Bad boy! (giggles)
Hound: Oh shit.
Valentino: Yeah, a star. Porn star. Ok, yep, bring me another or I'll fucking kill you! I said I'll fucking kill you, and I will.
Angel Dust: Excuse me! Pardon me! Get out of my way!
[Angel tumbles onto the platform and grabs Niffty, who is still running in midair as Angel holds her.]
Valentino: Holy shit, Angel Dust? What are you doing here, baby? You didn't get enough dick today?
Angel Dust: Funny.
Valentino: Who's this chiquita? You bringing me fresh meat?
[Niffty bites at Valentino and Valentino yelps.]
Valentino: Oi!
Niffty: I just want a taste.
Valentino: Weird, but there's a kink for that, I'm sure!
[Angel stands up, still holding Niffty.]
Angel Dust: Fuck off, Val.
Valentino: Excuse me?
Angel Dust: I said fuck off! I may have to put up with your bullshit, but you ain't fuckin' with any of my friends!
[Valentino summons his red smoke chain and grabs Angel with it, pulling him close.]
Valentino: You forget who you're talking to? I own you, bitch.
Angel Dust: Yeah, you do, in the studio. And you can do anything you want to me there, just like our deal says. But out here, I get to do what I want. So once again, FUCK. OFF!!
[Valentino smacks Angel, sending him tumbling to the side as Valentino walks over.]
Valentino: Enjoy the rest of your night, bitch, because I'm going to enjoy making you pay for it tomorrow.
[Suddenly a bottle is thrown at Valentino square in the face, it breaks and cuts Valentino cheek as blood drips into the floor.]
Valentino: WHO THE FUCK THREW-?! (Notices who threw it and growls) You....
[Is revealed that the person who threw the bottle was Hound. Angel Dust is surprised, Hound walks towards them and stands in front of him. Cherri stands beside Angel.]
Hound: Long time no see Moth man...
Valentino: You fucking mutt!
Hound: Aw! Are you still mad that a fourteen year old me destroyed one of your biggest porn studios making you loose millions? Maybe you shouldn't have stolen an employee whose contract was still ongoing!
[The female demons look at Valentino with a scowl. He snarls in anger and pulls his revolver and aims it straight into Hound's forehead.]
Valentino: I swear one of these days I'm going to kill you, slowly and painfully as it can possibly be.
[It quickly cuts to Cereza and Sable looking at Hound worried.]
Cereza: (Crossing fingers and whispering) Please don't make things worse. Please don't make things worse. Please don't make things worse.
Hound: (Spy orb) Funny, I was about to say the same thing. But how about I do it now?
Cereza: FUCK!
[It cuts back to Hound cracking his knuckles and was about to punch Valentino but its stopped by Angel yanking his jacket.]
Angel Dust: Stop, please you already did enough. Let's just get Niffty and get out of here.
Cherri: Fuckin' dickhead...
[Hound helps Angel stand up and walks back to his friends. Not before Hound quickly gives the middle finger to Valentino.]
Angel Dust: Fuck it. It was worth it.
[Husk smiles and puts a hand on Angel's back as they walk off.]
Husk: Way to go, kid.
[Niffty appears tears off a part of Valentino's fur.]
Valentino: Ow! What the fuck?!?
Niffty: For my collection! (chuckles) Wait up, guys!
Cherri: Did you just call these cunts your friends? Thought that was my job.
Angel Dust: There's room for everyone, and ya know... you could come crash with us too.
Cherri: Okay, look, Angie, I'm glad this hotel shit is workin' for you, but you know me, bitch, I'm doin' just fine! In fact, I'm gonna fuck the next guy I see, okay? But if you need me, you know where to find me, yeah?
Sir Pentious: (panting) is Cherri still here? (Cherri walks into the sex room with another demon.) Damnit!
[Scene transitions back to the angelic courtroom.]
Charlie: See! He did everything on your checklist! He was selfless, he stopped Niffty from stealing and he stuck it to that moth man! Not only that he stopped a fight!
Adam: Uhhh... well, uh... then why isn't he here then? Hm?
Emily: Yeah, why isn't he here?
[The angels observing the court all murmur together.]
Charlie: Wait... none of you know what gets someone into Heaven?
Sera: This questioning stops now. When Purgatorio closed we know when a soul arrives, we know when they pass divine judgment, it is our job to ensure these souls are safe.
[2:10-2:26]
[Sable and Cereza join them with the song.]
Charlie, Emily, Sable and Cereza: ♫ If Hell is forever, then Heaven must be a lie
If angels can do whatever, and remain in the sky
The rules are shades of gray when you don't do as you say
When you make the wretched suffer just to kill them again ♫
[Lute then sees the scared faces of the angels and gets a smirk on her face.]
Lute: Then what about the Crimson Knight?! Does he also deserves redemption?!
[Sera eyes widen after hearing that name. Both Cereza and Vaggie look at Lute shocked.]
Emily: Who?
Sable: Oh no...
Adam: (Innocently) Oh did you forgot about him? (Normal) You can call us murderers all you want but at least we are quick and painless! Not like this fucker.
Sable: Wait!
[The orb flashes again, it shows several Exorcist on a street, then it cuts to the Knight swinging from a building before landing on an Exorcist, he kills his whole way through the street, with his katana, revolver and axe.]
[He dodge rolls a spear thrown at him and his armored knuckle sprouts claws that tear apart the Exorcist mid section, he punches the Exorcist again before ripping her throat out with his claws.]
[Five Exorcist attack him simultaneously he just summons his Katana again and takes a swing decapitating all Exorcists.]
[All Angels gasp in horror, even Emily is scared. Both Adam and Lute fist bump then turns around to the crowd.]
Adam: See?! That's why Extermination is necessary! Would you really be okay living with someone who killed thousand of us!
Lute: Not only that but he also responsible for the death Alya, Rosa, Aniela, and Evangeline. He is remorseless monster.
[All Angels murmur, Charlie snaps out of it before addressing Adam.]
Charlie: But he-!
Sera: THAT'S ENOUGH!
[All the court then turns silent after Sera's outburst.]
Sera: (Inhales to keep composure) I'm sorry... but this court finds that there is no evidence souls in Hell can longer be redeemed.
Adam: Oh, FUCK, YES!! I WIN!!! SUCK IT ASSHOLES. You better save the date cunts, 'cause we're coming to your hotel FIRST.
[Adam snaps his fingers, reopening the portal to Hell.]
Cereza: What?!
Sable: You hypocrites!
Charlie: What... NO!! You can't-
Vaggie: You... Motherfu-
[Charlie, Vaggie, Cereza and Sable scream as they are transported back to Hell through the portal.]
Emily: Charlie!! Don't give up on this! I'll figure something out, I promise!
Sera: That wasn't called for, Adam. Nobody else was supposed to know about him.
Adam: Yeah, But did you see the looks on their fucking faces, it was.... d-d- (stammers) Sorry....
[The court, Adam, and Lute fly away.]
Emily: Extermination...of human souls!? Demon or not there is NO reason to be doing this.
Sera: They were uprising, Emily. It is my position as the head Seraphim to protect our people at all costs. And it's your position to keep them happy and joyful.
[Sera leans forward, putting her hands on Emily's shoulders.]
Emily: How can I bring joy when I now know we are bringing misery to thousands of innocent people?
Sera: Heaven needs us, Emily. Everyone looks to us... and we can't doubt ourselves or worry about the fates of demons when we have our own souls to protect. You saw what that Knight could do to us. Please.... if you start to question... you could end up like Lucifer. FALLEN. I couldn't bear to see you suffer that fate, so please, let me worry about this, ok?
Emily: Did your friend also agreed to this?
[A flashback starts to the aftermath of the first extermination, Sera is looking guilty before an scared Angel enters the room in a panic.]
Angel: Your highness uh... Death is here and he-
[A loud crashing noise is heard that just scares the Angel even more.]
Death: (Off screen) SERA!
Angel: EEEH! (Hides behind Sera) wants to speak with you.
[The doors open violently and Death appears with a huge glare towards Sera.]
Sera: Leave us alone.
[The Angel quickly leaves, Sera finally addresses Death.]
Sera: Death I can explain-
Death: Why the hell have thousands of Angels come forth massacring Sinners souls?! Specially those I was supposed to take to Purgatorio! Nobody told me anything about this Sera!
Sera: Things have changed Death...Redemption is no longer an option, demons have grown more powerful and regretfully a difficult choice was made.
Death: You are telling me that he just decided to leave me and Yggdrasil out of work!
[Sera just looks down, guilt all over her face.]
Death: He doesn't know? (Realizes) You didn't Sera...
[Sera just keeps quiet.]
Death: Fine then! Let's see how he reacts to this news...
[Death starts to walk away, Sera is left distraught but then composes herself and frowns in anger.]
Sera: (Threatening) If you go talk to him, I'll personally send every soul you and Yggdrasil have saved back to Hell. Where they will not be spared.
[Death stops dead in his track before looking at her with pure hatred and anger.]
Death: (Growling) You wouldn't...
Sera: This is the best course of action Death. It pains me to say this but until the demons are no longer a threat Purgatorio will be officially closed. I'm sorry and please send my condoleces to Yggdrasil.
[Death then punches the wall so hard that it cracks all the way where Sera is.]
Death: I always thought Heaven and Hell were made for those who deserved it, but now I'm not so sure. Considering you are still here after doing this.
[Death then points his sickle towards Sera.]
Death: Heed my warning Sera! No matter when I will make sure Heaven pays greatly for this! Nobody messes with Souls! Specially not like this!
[The flashback ends. Sera just kisses Emily's forehead]
Sera: I'm sorry.
[Emily puts a hand on Adam's list gently, it cuts back to Adam and Lute in a room.]
Adam: Fuck yes! We are fucking gonna slaughter each one of them bitch- Holy shit!
[He is scared by a portal opening in the middle of the room, out of it an amazonian figure appears being almost twice the size of them both. None other than the Angel Laila. Her gold blonde hair, toned body and specially his giant scowl she has towards Adam. ]
Lute: Matriarch Laila?!
Adam: Laila! So nice to see you tits! Have you finally changed your bitchy attitude towards me?
Laila: Still a disgusting pig as always Adam. But I do have something for you.
Adam: Anything you want baby. (Wink.)
[Laila then punches Adam so hard he is left stuck in his bedroom wall.]
Lute: Sir!
[Laila does the same with Lute, she crashes into Adam and the two fall into the floor.]
Adam: What the fuck is wrong with you cunt?! (Pushes Lute off of him) Are you on your fucking period?!
Laila: Why didn't you two imbeciles told me that Lucifer's daughter had brought hell born with her?!
Adam: Because it was just that traitorous skank of Vaggie and two stupid mutts! Why the fuck do you care about it?
[Laila grabs Adam's robe by the shoulders and pull him cose to her.]
Laila: Because one of those damn mutts is the one who slaughter my daughters you misogynist brainless bastard!
Lute: (Shocked) What?
Adam: Huh the fuck are you talking about?
[Laila drops Adam.]
Laila: Remember I'm the only one with the complete footage you two showed which by the way I specifically ordered you not and as soon I saw that damn dog's face I knew I was watching the same person who beat my eldest daughter to death.
Lute: We are sorry your highness but we needed to rally the court to our favor. But are you implying that a hellhound killed your daughters? If that's the case, doesn't that mean we can finally destroy Hell?
Adam: Yes! Finally!
[He is punched again.]
Laila: Unfortunately not, because my daughters (sigh) killed a hell born first. If we attack all Hell Sera will pay grave consequences.
Lute: No! That's impossible!
Adam: Oh that's so fucking great! (Fake clapping) Bravo MILF of the year! (Crosses arms) So what do you propose we do then?
Laila: I'm gonna join you this year and there will be retribution for my daughters. And we are gonna make sure there is no way a Sinner ever comes back to Heaven ever again!
[Laila summons his double edged blade. Both Adam and Lute smirk at each other, the episode ends.]
[Fuck! I think this is the longest chapter I ever made!]