ꜱɪɴᴄᴇʀᴇʟʏ ᴀʟᴀꜱᴛᴏʀ || ʜᴀᴢʙɪɴ ʜ...

By cappuchuuino

1.5K 104 237

❝Alastor: I AM NOT A CIRCUS. SINCERELY ALASTOR Vox: You won't let me touch your urine :((❞ • where charlie ma... More

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By cappuchuuino

Charlie Morningstar added 6 contacts to the group chat!

Charlie renamed the group chat to Hazbin Hotel Gc :D

Charlie: Hey guys!! Just wanted to be able to contact everyone in the hotel if needed :D

Angel Dust: this won't do.

Charlie: ??? :D

Angel Dust renamed the group chat to angel's poorly directed porno

Angel Dust: that's better :3

Vaggie: how is this even remotely a porno

Angel Dust: that's why it's poorly directed

Niffty: FRIENDS >:)))

Sir Pentious: Hello everyone I am messaging you all from my mobile device!! :S

Husk: this is a bad idea

Charlie: Nonsense! Now. Anyone heard from Alastor??

Husk: he's hissing at his phone

Angel Dust: fucks sake who let him have a phone

Charlie: We need to stay in contact with EVERYONE!! Alastor included!!

Husk: every notification he receives his ears pin to his head and he throws it

Husk: it's quite funny

Vaggie: can't you get him to at least try to text?

Husk: i don't want to

Vaggie: do it.

Husk: i'm not a pussy

Angel Dust: yeah you are

Husk: fuck you

Angel Dust: i'm TRYING

Alastor: HELLO EVERYONE, I AM USING THE PHONE. SINCERELY ALASTOR

Angel Dust: oh this is funny

Charlie: Alastor! :D

Alastor: HELLO. SINCERELY ALASTOR

Husk: you do realise you don't need to type in caps and in letter format

Alastor: I AM AWARE. I SIMPLY DO NOT KNOW HOW TO TURN CAPS OFF. SINCERELY ALASTOR

Niffty: PRESS THE ARROW

Alastor: HOw MaNy tiMeS dO I PreSs thE aRroW bUttOn? siNcErElY ALAsTor

Vaggie: press it once dumbass

Alastor: Ah it seems I have figured it out. Sincerely Alastor

Sir Pentious: Well done sir!!

The Famalam

Charlie: I finally made a group chat with my friends!! :D

Lucifer: well done my daughter

Charlie: You don't have to call me daughter :(

Lucifer: you're right i'm sorry

Charlie: Is mother online?

Read by all

Lucifer: yes she's online :D

Charlie: Mum should I wear the red dress or the black dress for my date with Vaggie? :))

Read by all

Lucifer: don't leave her on read again lilith :(

Charlie: :(((

Lucifer: don't worry charlie! i'll get her to respond

Lucifer: respond if you love me :D

Read by all

Lucifer: respond if my dick is big

Charlie: Sorry what?

Read by all

Lucifer: ouch okay

Lucifer: respond if your ass is phat

Read by all

Charlie: I think that's enough Dad :/

Lucifer: nuh uh

Lucifer: respond if you want to see me double cheeked up on an elephant furiously dancing to gangnam style

Lilith: You should wear the red dress.

Charlie: Okay Mum!! :D

Lucifer: When are you coming back to hell my love?

Read by all

AFTER THE BATTLE MASTERLESS CATTLE

Velvette: who named this fucking group chat

Valentino: Do you not like it :((

Vox: I very clearly remember you singing this then sticking your tongue down my throat

Velvette: gross.

Valentino: It's not gross if he liked it

Velvette: is that your life motto

Valentino: Fuck you

Velvette: nuh uh

Vox: UGH ALASTOR WONT RESPOND TO MY MESSAGES

Velvette: here we go again

Vox: THE FUCKER THINKS HE CAN ESCAPE ME??? IM GOING TO MAKE HIM REGRET EVERY DECLINING MY OFFER

Vox: WITH HIS STUPID FLUFFY EARS AND TINY WAIST WHO DOES HE THINK HE IS TO REJECT ME?????

Vox: AND ANOTHER THING

Velvette muted Vox for 24 hours

Valentino: I bet Alastor could suck good dick though

Velvette muted Valentino for 24 hours

Velvette: finally some good fucking peace

adam and the hoes

Adam: WHATS UP BITCHES WHO WANTS TO ENGAGE IN MASS MURDER

Lute: "engage" B-3

Adam: is that a dick

Lute: obviously fucking not

Adam: what's it supposed to be then

Lute: it's a man with glasses and a nose and a shit eating grin

Adam: all i see is a tip and balls

Emily: :o

Sera: Let's remind everyone that this is a group chat.

Adam: gah you're so boring

angel's poorly directed porno

Angel Dust: who ate the last pickle sandwich

Husk: who the fuck eats a pickle sandwich

Angel Dust: me bitch

Vaggie: that was me i'm sorry

Angel Dust: ok

Vaggie: angel stop glaring at me i'll make you a new one

Angel Dust: :3

Alastor: I PREFER THE SOULS OF THE INNOCENT. SINCERELY ALASTOR

Niffty: WHY ARE YOU TYPING IN CAPS AGAIN

Alastor: I BROKE THE BUTTON AND NOW I'M STUCK IN CAPITAL LETTERS AGAIN. SINCERELY ALASTOR

Vaggie: why are you both shouting

Niffty: I LOVE CAPS BECAUSE IT SHOWS HOW HAPPY I AM

Alastor: I AM NOT SHOUTING? I AM SILENT EXCEPT FOR THE NOTIFICATION OF MY PHONE. SINCERELY ALASTOR

Angel Dust: oh my hell

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