"Hope for the besst but plan for the worsst," Weetie said to herself pushing open the whithered gate to guard quarter.
She was sure the warden expected her to cling to her duty. But Weetie's time away form Shis had confused the clarity that all Akri felt in the nest. It was his own fault, unlike a true lizard, the warden duty fuzzy. Something that should be clear and pure.
"He even said he met the Dragon, but that can't be true," she asked herself.
All classes of Akri believed in the Dragon, and that she lived in Sakond, their capital. But strictly speaking they had no proof that she actually existed, beyond the fact that the other matriarchs said so. The courtesans that were sent to entertain her were never seen again. But to think that the matriarchs would lie — even about the fact that someone other than them had seen the Dragon — that was the worst kind of heresy.
"But at least I know the matriarchss don't care what happenss to me," she said slightly less blasphemously. "Then again they have never said that they did."
She fully understood and agreed with the value of hierarchy. As an officer, she expected respect and obedience from her subordinates. As her superiors expected it of her, and their leaders most off all. She had never expected or wanted them to care if she went missing. What she expected was that they would keep sending replacements until her duty was done. For her and anyone else who went missing.
"But ssince that'ss what will happen, what doess it matter how I go misssing? The result will be the same, the duty will continue."
Weetie was as disillusioned as any Akri warrior had been in centuries. Which meant she'd made plans for the unthinkable. She was going to be the first from her class to go AWOL.
Even among the lowest class, the male courtesans, it was rare but not unheard off.
But all warriors lived for the opportunity to throw their lives away in defence of the egg-laying matriarchs. It was considered their highest honour.
"But I'm not really abandoning the duty, am I?" It was an irregular concept for a lizard captain.
But, then again, with her lisp, she had always been a little irregular. And her time in Zig-Zig had fermented a bubbling defiance in her, and now the cork was ready to pop.
Her plan had been brewing ever since Herschel's escape, the warden had been so worried the trend of escaping would spread to the prisoners. He never considered it might spread to a guard. But she wouldn't be going by something as disgusting as the sewers. As the guard captain, she had good relations with the ship captains that came to Zig-Zig's harbour. Something about having the same rank made it easier to relate.
A ship was due to arrive soon. Even if she had to hijack it, when it left she would be on board. It meant she would never be able go home again. Never see another Akri nest. For the rest of her days it would be her for herself, not for the nest.
"But I can't let the warden have thiss win, not that it will matter in the large scale?"
So, she would go to Bilib. Even a lizard-woman should be able to disappear in that giant city. She could surely find work in the Kanspor fighting arenas. Not as a fighter, that would be to public. The most famous ones were even heard off in Shis. But behind the scenes, as a trainer. There her lifelong experience must have some value?
But wherever she ended up, she would have taken the only victory there was to be had from the warden. At least for a while.
"I hope he won't bother looking for me." But here too she would plan for the worst.
Updated: 23.02.2024