The story starts with The main crew watching Alastor laughing maniacally as he hears Pentious screaming.
Sir Pentious: "Arrgh! Oh! Please! Stop!"
Charlie: "Um...Alastor! I think he's had enough."
Angel Dust: "Nah. He's got a few more hits in him."
Sir Pentious falls from the zeppelin in front of Alastor, face first on the ground. Alastor twirls his staff.
Alastor: "Thanks for another forgettable experience."
An Egg Boi falls and breaks into pieces in front of Charlie.
Sir Pentious: "Thank you... for letting your guard down!"
Using his tail, he grabs a bit of Alastor's suit.
Ray: "Shouldn't have done that."
Sir Pentious: "Aha! Yah! Oh, shit..."
Sir Pentious looks up to see Alastor's shadow transform in front of him and Alastor apparently makes an elk bugle. The next shot shows a massive green explosion as Sir Pentious is seen flying off to the city screaming as he disappears from sight.
Alastor: "Well, it looks as though I need a visit to the tailor! Best of luck, chums.
Vaggie: Wait, you're leaving?! Alastor! We need your help! We need you to do your job."
Angel Dust: "We need a wall."
Charlie: "No need to worry, I'm sure Ray can handle it."
Ray: "I'll get my wrench..."
Angel Dust: [Giggles.] "Well, I do love me a man with a giant ...tool."
Ray: [Groans]
The screen zooms out to reveal Valentino scowling at the current events, leaning his face against the screen.
Valentino: "See?! Look how he flirts with that guy, and he's not even paying! Who is that? I'm gonna fucking kill his whole fucking family! Vox? VOX!"
Vox was paying little attention, as his left pupil turns into a tilde as he eyes Alastor leaving, his appearance static and out of focus as the screen becomes a bit static.
Vox: [glitches] "That FUCKER is back!"
Valentino grins as he realizes the situation and walks to him.
Valentino: "Yeah! I thought he was gone for good too!"
Vox: "It's been seven years!"
Valentino leans up to him and pinches his cheek, Vox clearly pissed to care.
Valentino: "You still pissed that he almost beat you that time?"
Vox: "Uh, FUCK YOU."
Valentino: "Just saying."
Vox: "Things have changed a lot since he left town!"
Valentino: "THAT'S for sure."
Vox: "I gotta send a message of who's REALLY in charge of things now!"
The scene cuts to the emergency meeting with Vox, Velvette, and Valentino to discuss a matter with Alastor as a Robo-Fizz, Kitty, pass out drinks to each of them.
Vox: "We have a problem. Alastor is getting close to little princess Morningstar, so our main concern now is ensuring that no deal is ever struck between Lucifer's BRAT and that smiling freak!"
Velvette: "Well, how exactly are we supposed to stop it?"
Valentino was putting so much glue on his revolver to decorate with glitter and marbles.
Valentino: "Put something inside them. That's how I get the bitches to behave."
Vox: "Well, maybe someone on the inside isn't such a bad idea. Do you think Angel would?"
Valentino: "That lanky prick won't even return my calls."
Vox: "We need someone who Little Miss Bleeding Heart would take in.
Velvette: Someone...pathetic, desperate, with no direct ties to us?"
Valentino: "I employ every down on their luck loser this side of Hell. Who the fuck is left?"
Vox: [Scoffs.] "I think, I have... JUST the one."
As Vox slowly turns around, the sharks in the shark tank swim up to his shoulders, his right-hypnotic eye gleaming with a sinister grin for a plan he has in store.
Back at the hotel, Alastor's black and white demons are currently fixing the hole in the wall as Charlie and Vaggie returns. Charlie throws herself onto a couch, exhausted.
Angel Dust: "Soooo? How'd it go?"
Vaggie: [Sighs.] "Not a single new recruit."
Angel Dust: "Yeah well, who would wanna use their last days not fucking and fighting?"
As Angel checks his phone, Vaggie hears a knock on the front door. She walks over to it and opens the door, only to find Sir Pentious behind it, holding his hat.
Sir Pentious: "Why, hello my dear-"
Sir Pentious is cut off by Vaggie punching him in the face. He falls when Vaggie brought out her spear at him. Sir Pentious cowers in fear with the tip barely at his neck, and held a peace sign gesture.
Sir Pentious: "Wait, wait, wait! I come in peaccccccccce."
Vaggie: "What are you doing here?"
Charlie appears behind Vaggie.
Charlie: "Vaggie, what's the problem?" [gasps] "Oh! Hello again!"
Sir Pentious: "I didn't come looking for a fight. I uhh.. I heard that you're helping people, people who want to be better?"
Charlie lets out a gasp and runs over to grabs his hand and leads him to the door of the hotel.
Charlie: "You heard right! Welcome to our home of healing, our resort of restoration, our-"
Angel Dust and Ray appear from the door and cuts off Charlie.
Angel Dust: "Are you fucking nuts?"
Ray: "Yeah, im not trusting this Selfish Sniveling Slippery Skanky Slutbag Serpent Shitstain!!"
Angel dust: "You can chill it with the Alliteration. But no seriously, he tried to kill us 6 hours ago! And now you wanna bring him in here to live with us?"
Charlie: "Absolutely! This place is about second chances, and who deserves one more than this slithery... slippery... special little man!"
Angel Dust: [To Vaggie] "Aren't you supposed to protect this place?"
Charlie gives her puppy-dog eyes, begging Vaggie to give Sir Pentious a chance to live in the hotel. Vaggie gives in.
Vaggie: ".......I guess he's not much of a threat without the war machine, or even with the war machine."
Charlie was so happy that she hugs Vaggie, lifting her up in the process and twirling around once.
Charlie: "Oh! Thank you thank you thank you thank you! Sir Pentious! Welcome to the Hazbin Hotel!"
Charlie leads Sir Pentious to the door inside of the hotel.
Sir Pentious: "Oh no darling! Thank you! You won't regret this."
Angel follows soon afterwards.
Angel Dust: "Eh, I give you a week, tops."
Ray: "If you try anything, I'm fucking you up."
Sir pentious: "...."
Charlie: "D-Dont wo-"
Ray: "No....Charlie, if he tries something, I'm killing him. You cant save him."
Charlie gives Sir Pentious the tour of the hotel, introducing Husk to him, the wall he blow up before it was fixed.
Charlie: "So, this is the bar and the bartender. This is the curtain, and this is the new wall after you broke the last one, heh, and oh! Oh! This is the-"
Vaggie grabs Charlie to calm her down again.
Vaggie: "Babe, you don't have to show him every detail."
Ray: "Nah, this is funny, continue."
Charlie: "Sorry, I'm just so excited to have our first real guest!"
Angel Dust: "Uh, what the hell am i then?"
Charlie: "Well, you're an important part of our family here Angel, but you uhm, uh..."
Vaggie: "Constantly make us look bad, sexually harass the staff, and have literally never once tried to improve?"
Charlie: "What she means is, it's just nice to have someone interested for once."
As Charlie walks back to Sir Pentious, Angel Dust looks downtrodden, likely feeling sad about Vaggie's comments and Charlie's unintentional dismissal of him.
Ray: "That's rough buddy."
Angel dust: "Shut up.."
Niffty is seen playing playing with Keekee with a string when Charlie and Sir Pentious approach. Keekee hisses at the sight of Sir Pentious and jumps in Rays arm.
Ray: "It's okay, the scary snake man won't live long to hurt you."
Charlie begins introducing Nifty.
Charlie: "Over here we have our maid Niffty."
Niffty: [gasp] "The bad boy is back!"
Niffty gets up on Sir Pentious and holds his collars, looking at him with insanity in her red eye and a very haunting smileile smile, which creeps out Sir Pentious.
Niffty: "Never leave me again."
Charlie: "We're about 80% sure she's harmless, and over here we have-" [nearly bumps into Alastor] "Oh! Uh, Alastor! Our gracious facility manager! You've met our newest guest Sir Pentious...hehe.."
Alastor: "Ah yes! You're the one who ruined my coat!"
Alastor's eyes glow red in the dark with a violent temptation to rip him a part.
Alastor: I definitely remember you now.
Sir Pentious: [gulps nervously.]
Charlie: "Well, I guess this is a great time for your first lesson!" [Clears throat] "How to apologize!" The first step to becoming a better person is to admit when you are wrong, why don't you give it a try?"
Sir Pentious: "Yes..uhm.. Mr uhm.. Radio Demon sir, please forgive me for attacking you and ruining your very lovely coat.. uhm.. here."
As a token of apology, Sir Pentious hands back the small fabric he tear from Alastor's coat. Alaster takes it and inspects the damage.
Alastor: "Ah-Ho! Not many people have been able to take even this much off me, it must have meant quite a lot to you."
Despite being generous, Alastor spontaneously combusts the fabric tear into green flames, leaving Sir Pentious and Charlie stunned.
The scene cuts to a group gathering introducing Sir Pentious to the hotel.
Charlie: "Now, with a new resident, I think it's important we all get to know each other! So we are going to play a little game. Everyone, follow me. My name is Charlie *claps twice* I like to sing! *claps twice* and when we get to know each other it's the greatest thing!" *claps twice*
Sir Pentious: "My name's Sir Pentious *claps twice* I like to build *claps twice* and despite my stupid Egg Bois, I think I'm very skilled!" *claps twice*
When it was Angel's turn, he looked disinterested, looking up from his phone.
Angel Dust: "This is stupid."
Charlie: "This- is not- stupid! *claps twice* It's just a game! *claps twice* Sir Pentious did it well so now please try to do the same!" *claps twice*
Angel Dust: "I am too sober for this."
Ray: [drinks flask. The flask itself not the liquid]
Vaggie: "Well, get used to it and learn how to play, this is gonna be your whole day!" *claps twice*
The next scene cuts to a act with Angel Dust wearing a trench coat and a hat as he reads a script. Sir Pentious is also acting as a innocent child wearing a sailor suit, licking a comically large lollipop.
Angel Dust: "Oh, I'm a bad man on the streets who never got enough hugs, now, where's an innocent kid I can sell crack to? Wow, who wrote this?"
Ray: "I dunno, seems pretty natural to me. I mean that's how I sound when I still crack to kids."
Charlie: "It's great right? Keep going!"
Angel Dust: "Hey you."
Sir Pentious: "Who, me?"
Angel Dust: "Yeah, you look like a kid who could use some... devil's dandruff?? Oh, for fuck's sake."
Sir Pentious: "Not me! I have to go home and study!"
Angel Dust: "Come on kid, it'll make you cool like me ...the crackhead."
Sir Pentious: "The only cool thing here is to say no to drugs!"
Ray: "lame."
Sir pentious: "Now, if you'll excuse me-"
Ray: "he's still going?"
Sir pentious: "I'm off to not have sexual intercourse before marriage!""
triumphant trumpet sting
Charlie: [stands up and claps] "Yes! Oh bravo! Bravo! wow Pentious! At this rate, you'll be redeemed in no time."
Angel Dust: "I... I'm going to bed."
As Angel heads back up to his room, he overhears Charlie congratulating Sir Pentious. Looking back at them, he looks sad.
Charlie: "I am so proud of you Sir Pentious! That was amazing!"
Sir Pentious: "Thank you! Thank you! You like me! You really like me!"
In Angel's room, Fat Nuggets is asleep on his bed until Angel accidentally throws his coat on top of him. Fat Nuggets grunts and crawls out of the coat, as he watches Angel lie down on his bed. Angel glumly looks at his phone and sees all his voice mails from Valentino. Angel sighs and begins to play them. Valentino's voice mails switch back and forth between a friendly, apologetic tone and a barrage of screams threatening violence.
Valentino (voice message):
Angel baby, come home! It's not the same without you here, I miss you! Come back-
ANGEL, YOU BITCH! IF YOU DON'T COME HOME, YOU'LL BE FUCKING GREASY TRUCKERS FOR THE NEXT YEAR-
Hey, amorcito, I didn't mean to yell, but you know how crazy you make me-
YOU FUCKING SLUT!
Hey, Angie! About earlier-
-KILL YOUR WHOLE FUCKIN' FAMILY!
Work's really stressful!
-LITTLE COCKSUCKING PIECE OF SHIT!
Valentino: [dead serious] "You actually think you can change?"
red smoke appears from seemingly nowhere, and circles around Angel until Val stops talking, ending with the smoke clinging around his neck and chin like hands before fading away.
Valentino: "Addict trash like you doesn't change. I'll see you soon, baby."
Angel sighs as Fat Nuggets gets on the bed next to him.
Angel Dust: "...Sorry, not now, Fat Nuggets."
Angel gets up and leaves his room with Fat Nuggets looking worried. Angel goes to Husk's bar, picks up a whole bottle, and starts drinking alcohol. Out of the corner of his eye, he notices something slithering away. He follows, finding Charlie's office door opened, and takes a peek inside. There, he discovers that Sir Pentious is setting up a small camera in one of the bookshelves, a camera that belong to Vox. Angel realizes what he's been doing and slams the door open.
Angel Dust: "You slippery little shit!"
Sir Pentious: [yelps]
The two Scramble until Ray walks in on them.
Ray: "Oh my Jesus mother fucker. What the FUCK is wrong with you?!"
Angel Dust: "This bitch is working with vees! I fucking knew there was something shitty about you."
Sir Pentious: "I don't know what you're talking about!...whore bug!"
Angel, sufficiently angered, attempts to tackle Sir Pentious but was stopped by Ray.
Ray: "Angel Cool it, plus that was more of a objective Description than an insult."
Then Charlie and Vaggie woke up after hearing the scuffle.
Charlie: [Yawns] "What's going on?"
Angel Dust: "This little bitch is a traitor!"
Sir Pentious: "Preposterous! I would never betray you. You... are my best friends!" [hugs both girls]
Angel Dust: "No he isn't! He literally has a camera between those books."
Ray turns to the swlf and lifts off one of the books to reveal a camera, much to Charlie's shock. Sir Pentious realizes that his cover is blown and scurries away. He brings out his wrist watch to make contact with Vox.
Sir Pentious: "Ah! Ah! Abort! Abort! S.O.S! Agent Pentious in need of immediate evacuation!"
Vox immediately picks up.
Vox: "Pentious? Wait... you were caught?!? It hasn't even been, a day!"
Sir Pentious: "Please! You've got to get me out of here!"
Vox: "I can't believe we thought you could handle even something this simple! Do us a favour, if they don't kill you, go ahead and do it yourself! You MISERABLE FAILURE!"
Sir Pentious: [crying] "I... I... just make it quick I guess...not that I deserve it."
Sir Pentious lies on the ground, with Vaggie holding a spear ready to pierce the skull.
Vaggie: "Gladly."
Right before Vaggie can put him out of misery, Charlie stops her.
Charlie: "Wait! ...Pentious?"
charlie extends her hand towards Pentious
As the song ends, Niffty is seen standing in the hallway in her bedwear.
Niffty: "I hated that song! Why are you so lame?!"
Niffty kicks him on of his tail 'eyes' and walks away.
Niffty: "Not a bad boy."
Charlie: [Happily sighs] "Good first day! Let's get some rest!"