"Hey sleepyhead," I heard someone whisper beside me and turned to see Lee Know waking up Han who had fallen asleep in Chan and I's bunk.
Chan was there, too, and smiling cutely at me.
"Sorry, I didn't mean to fall asleep," Han yawned as he turned to me.
"We'll share it next time," Chan hugged Lee Know who rolled his eyes.
"In your dreams, Christopher," Lee Know answered. Chan released him with a laugh, and Han stood up.
"Are we there yet?" he asked when he realized the bus was still moving.
"We will be in 15, and I know you like to brush your teeth and all that," Lee Know told him.
"Thanks," Han smiled and headed to the bathroom.
Chan plopped into bed beside me and closed the curtain. "Ella," he fake scolded me. "You shared our bed with another man!"
"I'm so sorry you found out this way," I joked.
Chan laughed and rolled his eyes. "I'm glad you and Han are friends."
"Me too." It was nice to have someone to talk to who sympathized with everything I was dealing with.
"Are you excited for Vegas?" he asked me. His normal cheeriness was back. He was undoubtedly masking his true feelings, but I also didn't want to wallow in what JYP had made me do. I wanted to get past it.
"No, but I'm sure you'll convince me to love it before we leave."
"Oh, you will, baby. Just wait!" He kissed my cheek.
"I should probably fix my hair for the walk into the hotel. I bet it's a mess," I told him as I sat up.
"It's messy but cute," he complimented. I reached up and felt the knots with my fingertips, so I knew he was lying.
I went to the bathroom, but the door was locked. Han was still in there. I didn't see Lee Know in the cabin, so I could've guessed what was going on.
"Han still in there?" Chan asked when I returned so quickly.
"With Lee Know," I told him.
"That could take a while," he joked. "Come here," he patted the bed in front of him, and I sat down with my back to him.
Chan undid my pony tail and my mess of waves fell down my back. He massaged his fingers against my scalp, and I let out a quiet moan as I leaned back, relaxing into his touch.
My hair was too knotted for his hands to run through, but he compiled my hair into a higher ponytail on my head. He then worked to separate the mess into three distinctive pieces so he could brain them. When he got to the bottom, he realized he didn't have another ponytail.
"Hyunjin!" he called. "Do you have a lacky?"
"Yes, one sec!" Hyunjin appeared moments later and gave him a clear rubber elastic.
Chan finished my hair, and I turned to find him smiling to himself.
"Pretty," he told me, draping the braid across my shoulder.
Han and Lee Know emerged from the bathroom, and I headed inside to see how Chan had done my hair. He followed me.
"You did so good, baby," I complimented him examining the simple braid. It was perfect. He stood proudly in the doorway.
"We're here!" Lee Know called to us.
Chan and I got at the end of the line, and I prepared myself for more reporters and comments about my body. We were staying at MGM Grand and the manager was waiting to give us our room keys right at the door of the bus to limit our time in the lobby. We headed off and there were nearly a thousand people at the barricades. Reporters, fans, and curious people who had stumbled upon the crowd all surrounded us.
Cameras flashed brightly and Chan held my hand tightly as we walked. "You look beautiful," he whispered to me and kissed my cheek.
I blushed and grinned at him. "I love you," I told him.
"I love you too," he replied, and we headed straight to the elevator as we'd been instructed to do when we were handed our hotel keys. Chan and I were last, so once we got inside, the doors closed.
"That was crazy," I.N. announced. "Is it all because of Ella?"
"Some of it, but Vegas always loves us," Changbin reminded him. "And we love Vegas!" he chanted. His voice echoed in the elevator.
"The show is tomorrow night, and we have a couple of days here after that. I suggest we dine it up big tonight and gamble a little, shop tomorrow, and then hit the club the next night," Changbin planned. The others nodded in agreement.
We all headed to our rooms to get ready for dinner. Again, our room only had one bed, but this time I was excited because it meant more cuddles from Chan. I already felt more positive about Vegas. Still, I had no idea what people wore here. Sequins? Glitter?
"Do you want to order room service?" Chan asked. "You and Han slept through lunch."
"I'm okay," I smiled and kissed his cheek for offering. "What are we wearing to dinner?"
Chan retrieved our bags from the hallway and came over to me with a cheeky grin. "I got you something."
"Is it like the 'somethings' you got me before?" I laughed.
"No," he pouted. "You'll actually like it."
He headed to the closet where he'd had them put it away for us before we arrived. There was a garment bag, and he brought it to the bathroom door so he could unzip it properly for me.
Inside was a long-sleeved black dress with a shimmery mesh over the top of it. It was short but not so much that I'd risk exposing myself. The glitter was pretty and just enough. I smiled at it and turned to kiss Chan on the cheek.
"Thank—," I began.
"I also owed you this," he interrupted, presenting me with a gift bag.
I opened it and found a new lingerie set with a black lace bra and thong.
"Sorry about your other one," he smiled cutely. My face flushed as I remembered how he'd torn it off of me.
"Thank you, Cha—," I was cut off.
"Ooh! One more thing!" he exclaimed as he returned to the closet. He came back and handed me a long box. I immediately knew what it was, and I eagerly threw open the top. Inside was a pair of knee-high cowboy boots with black and dark silver gems placed into the leather unique pattern.
"Thank you! I love them," I managed to finally say.
"I'm glad you like them," he bashed.
"I'm going to shower!" I exclaimed as I ran to clean myself, so I could put on the pretty things he'd gotten me. Chan laughed as I skipped away.
I took my time shaving and washing my hair and brushing it out. I wanted to look perfect for him. I dried my hair and brushed my teeth before heading back into the room.
Chan was sitting on the bed when I walked back in.
"Where's the bracelet?" he asked with a serious expression while holding my phone.
"In the bathroom," I informed him and moved closer to sit beside him.
"Agent Branson called. She said that she got permission to go through his computers. It shouldn't be long now," he kissed my temple, but I could tell he was riddled with anxiety.
"Are you okay?" I asked him. "She may find information about the fan service on there."
"I know," he sighed. "It's a lot to process, but I'm okay. I know this is what's right."
"We'll get through it together," I told him and kissed his cheek. Chan put his hand on my thigh and flashed his dimple at me.
"I know we will, baby," he said before standing. "I'm going to go shower, too. I can't wait to see you all dressed up."
He headed to the bathroom still seeming a bit sad, but I hoped the time in the shower would help him.
I curled my hair which took the entire time it took him to shower. He came to sit beside me in his towel while I began my makeup. I caked my cheeks with blush, and he watched me with a cute expression.
"What?" I asked shyly.
"You're just adorable," he told me.
I shook my head and finished my makeup. Chan begged me for a kiss before I put on my lipstick. I obliged, and he perked back up to his happy self before going to the bathroom to change into his outfit while I put on mine.
I slipped into my new bra and thong and then stared at the dress where it now hung in the closet. I put it on but couldn't get the zipper up by myself.
I knocked for Chan's help. He opened the door and was wearing black trousers and a black satin shirt unbuttoned halfway. My heart stopped as I gazed at him.
"You look amazing," I told him. I reached out and touched the fabric of his shirt collar. It felt luxurious. Chan had his hair combed formally too, and I felt shy from how handsome he looked. My face turned pink.
"Did you need help with your dress?" He asked, noticing that it was falling off of my shoulder.
"Umm," I stammered. He looked so beautiful that I couldn't think. "Yes."
Chan grinned at me, and I spun around so that he could zip it up. His hand grazed against my skin as he did so, and I felt like it was the very first time he'd touched me. My insides were giddy and excited.
I turned around, and he looked down at me. "You look beautiful, Ella," he whispered. I was cursing at the fact that I'd chosen red lipstick because if we kissed right now, it would end up all over our chins. He seemed to realize that, too, and settled for my forehead.
He returned to the bathroom to finish something, and I turned to the mirror to look at myself. The dress was tight, high-necked but short, and just sparkly enough to shine under any light. I turned to the side though and caught a glimpse of my stomach.
Look at that bump! echoed in my ears. I put my hand on my stomach and could feel the bump they were talking about. JYP had been right. I should've lost weight. I felt like crying.
I stepped away to distract myself by getting my boots on. Chan had gotten me this dress. He liked it, so I would wear it.
The boots were an exact fit, and I went back to the mirror. I kicked my foot up to look at them and grinned. They were perfect.
My stomach though... I frowned at myself. I sucked in and tried to make myself appear smaller.
Chan came out of the bathroom with my bracelet. He put it on my wrist while I stared at myself some more, picking apart my body.
"What is it, baby?" he asked. He'd clearly noticed my shift in demeanor since getting dressed.
I sighed. "The article said they could see a bump."
"Oh," he exclaimed, clearly not expecting that to have been my concern. He came up behind me and placed his hands over mine where they sat on my stomach. It made me feel self-conscious.
"They're paid to write stuff like that, Ella. To me, you look exactly the same," he kissed my neck and looked at me through the mirror. His eyes were honest and kind.
"I need to start running again," I mumbled.
"We can start running again if you want to," he replied. "But you shouldn't do it because you think you need to change your body, baby. You look beautiful."
"There were a lot of comments calling my stomach huge and saying I must be months along," I told him. "They're even saying we must've gotten together before the NYC show."
"Ella," he turned me around to look at him. "You don't look pregnant. You look the same as when I met you."
"But they said..." I looked down. My stomach was poking out through the dress, and I sucked in.
"Wait, is this why you wouldn't eat lunch?"
"Maybe..." I sighed.
"Ella, baby, come here." Chan set me on the bed beside him, and I faced him but looked down at myself. "You are absolutely perfect to me. If you weighed double what you do now, I'd still think that. It doesn't matter what those articles said. JYP orchestrated them to hurt us...to hurt you. You're the most beautiful person I've ever known inside and out. Okay?"
I recalled how I'd looked when I did weigh double what I do now. It had taken a lot of effort for me to get healthier. I couldn't even run a quarter mile before. The articles calling attention to an insecurity of mine was hurtful.
"I used to be really out of shape," I confessed.
"I know, baby. I saw the stretch marks. But doing something for your health and doing something because you think you need to be smaller are very different mindsets. I'll run with you if you want to but for your health. I don't want you to ever, even for a second, believe that you need to change how you look."
I glanced up at Chan. He looked so serious and hurt...it genuinely upset him to hear me talk about myself like this.
"You saw the stretch marks?" I felt anxious and embarrassed.
"I've kissed them every time I've seen them, Ella. Every time I go down on you, they're right there on your thighs. I didn't say anything, but I wanted you to know that I loved them, too. I figured you'd notice if you were insecure about them, and, if you didn't, I wanted to kiss them anyway. I love every part of you."
I felt a single tear fall and roll down my cheek.
Fuck the lipstick. I pressed my lips against Chan's. He kissed mine purposefully as his hands held my back. "I love you," I told him when I pulled away.
He wiped away another tear that threatened to fall. "I love you, too. Please stop reading the comments, baby. They are just there to hurt us."
I nodded and went to the mirror. Even though I'd kissed him, my lipstick still looked perfect. It was, however, all over Chan. He grabbed makeup remover and a cotton pad and wiped it away.
"Better?" he asked as he stood behind me in front of the mirror again.
"Better. Not great, but better," I told him honestly.
"I have one more surprise for you," he remembered and went to his backpack.
He returned with a small box. He opened it and presented me with a necklace shaped like the moon.
"I figured it would be something you could wear tonight," he smiled as he took it out of the box. I moved my hair so he could put it on for me.
"It's so pretty," I told him as I touched the silver charm.
Chan held up his wrist for me. "I have a matching bracelet." He grinned, and I saw the moon emblem on a chain around his wrist.
We stood together in the mirror. My eyes trailed over Chan's chest which peaked through his shirt.
"You should wear this shirt more often," I complimented.
"I think what you mean is I should wear less of my shirts," he laughed.
"That too," I drooled over him. His hand slipped into his pocket, and he looked insanely hot.
"Shall we join the others?" he asked, holding his arm out for me to take.
"We shall," I replied with a smile.