Yaksha's POV
'I know you can do this. I know you will be perfect for this. I have my faith on you. Please...please I am begging you. Do.....'
I woke up with a jerk. What was that? A dream? What kind of dream was that?She..she looked like a shadow. I never had this kind of dream before. It was definitely a woman,who was sobbing. I looked up to it was dawn and sultan wasn't around. Did he go for his prayers?
The dream made my throat go dry and croaked. I need some water. I got down then bed and poured myself a glass of water from the clay jar. I was about to go to sleep but then I saw a glimpse of light. Huh? Who was in there?
I approached the light,my anklets from last night making slight noise in the background while my bangles clashed together.The light was coming from the small lamp placed around. And on the desk there,sultan was doing some paperwork with a frustrated look on his face.
I immediately remembered my assignments. Should I be grateful that I don't have to do that anymore? I probably should right?
"Why are you awake so early?"
His voice startled me,making me come out of my trance.
It's so early in the morning.Why does he have to look so good!
"I had a dream." Disturbing dream.
"What dream? Come here." He nodded his head towards him.
I walked towards him. Grabbing the chair next to him I tried to sit on it but before I could he grabbed my wrist pulling me towards him abruptly.
"Wha-" I tried to say but the words went back to my throat as he made me sit ho his lap. My hands clutched his collar as a result of his sudden action as a gasp escaped my lips in surprise.
"I am perfectly capable of sitting in the chair you know?" My voice came out more low than I intended it to.
"I know. But why would I miss any chance of you attached to me,skin to skin? And you look perfect here,on top of me." He tucked a piece of hair falling down on my face.
"Besides why would you sit on the chair when can sit on top of me."
I was literally thunderstruck. The heck he is talking about.
"Humein shamaj nehi aata aapne ye sab sikha kaha se hain. Sach bataiye aapki sach koyi premika nehi thi?"
( I really don't understand from where did you learn all these. Tell me honestly you really didn't have a past lover?)
I teased.
He scoffed. "Why? Are you jealous?"
Shouldn't I be? I am his wife after all. But who will tell him that and boost his ego.
"No. I am curious. You look very experienced."
Also yesterday Bisma was saying I am replacement of hers. I wonder if they had any history? She could be lying too. She is jealous of me I swear.
"Sach bateye toh ek mashuka hain humari. Bohot chahte hain hum unhe."
( If I say honestly I have a lover. I like her very much.)
Have? What does that mean? He still has someone? Even if he's married to me. My face instantly turned into a scowl.
All this,just a lie? A facade?
I started calmly even if my insides were in turmoil,"Who is that? Why did you marry me if you had someone? Didn't I tell you I don't like to share? I am not someone's second choice or option. I don't und-"
Suddenly he bursted out laughing. Why the hell? I don't understand.
"Humari nanhi si begum hum mazak kar rahe the. Hum sirf aap ki hain Yaksha Rashid Ahmed Khan."
( My little wife I was only joking. I am only yours Yaksha Rashid Ahmed Khan.)
My heart did that little flip flop hearing him calling my name connecting with his. Also because he says these flirtatious lines all the time.
He dropped his head on my neck,his breathing blowing onto my skin making me shudder with every exhale.
"Since the day I have realized what marriage is, I have saved myself for you begum. I didn't have eyes for someone else and I won't have in future too. There's a lot I can't guarantee to you. Like I won't ever make mistakes or I will forever be by your side. I am not immortal Yaksha, I will have to die someday. Maybe before you. But one thing I can guarantee is my loyalty begum. Rashid is promised to Yaksha from the day he had learned about her and he will forever be Yaksha's only till he dies."
Rashid is promised to Yaksha and he will forever be Yaksha's only.
But I am not Yaksha. He is talking about Yaksha. He is entitled to her,not me. But I can be selfish right? I was known as a very selfish person in my life. Yaksha doesn't exist but I do. And I am married to him. Not her. I made vows with him,not her.
Also that cunning Bisma. She freaking lied to me. Replacement my foot. As if anyone can replace me. Wait till I confront you woman.
My both hands unknowingly raised and started massaging his hair. I have been wishing for this,to caress his slightly long,curly and dark as night,black hair.
He hummed in satisfaction,his voice ringing against my body,making it sway in sensation.
It felt like he needed it,a little relaxation. Indeed being a sultan isn't as easy.
"Sab theek toh hain na? Aap bohot chintit lag rahe hain." I started messaging more.
( Is everything alright? You look very tensed.)
"I am sorry. I have never talked about it with you before right? I know I should've but it's just so disturbing that I didn't want to upset you."
"Huh? Upset me? Why would you upset me?" I tried to lift his head by he pressed it more against me,this time pressing his head against my chest,making me flustered.
"Rehne dijiye na.Itna sukoon akhri kab mila tha humein yaad nehi."
( Let me stay here please. Last when I felt this kind of peace I don't even remember.)
I went silent and froze on my spot.
He took hold of my finger putting it on his head again.
"Don't stop."
I sighed and started messaging again.
"Only if you tell me what is that you won't tell me."
I heard inhaling a long breath before starting again. "Do you know my father had two wives and several women around him?"
I cringed at his words. Even if it's normal for them the entire idea upsets me. Thank god my husband saved himself from being murdered by me.
I whispered a small yes as I did. Aaliyah told me that but she didn't tell me the details.
"Aaliyah is not my own sister,she is father's second's wife's daughter. But that doesn't make her any less than my own sister. She is my sister and that's a fact. But she isn't the only child of Thaani begum,my father's second wife. She has an elder son too.And he came back. On the day before the celebration."
"Came back? Where was he till now?" I asked now even more confused.
"Remembered the person I mentioned about killing?"
A shiver ran down my body hearing him mentioning about killing someone and not the good down.
"I do."
He raised his head now looking at me.
"He is well was a king from the north. My step-brother,Kahir was plotting against me with him. He was away for two years now he is back in the palace."
"What! Why is he staying in here if he is against you? What if he plots again? What if he plans assassin?What if he-wait why are grinning? Am I cracking some joke?"
"It feels so good when you worry about me begum."
Is he for real right now? Is that what important now? His freaking killer and plotting brother is here,living with us in the same palace.
"I don't believe you! I really am serious right now." I frowned.
"Oh my little wife. Okay I am sorry. But I know he won't do it again. There's a reason he is back my dear. His source of evil energy is permanently gone. The king is also dead and most of all he has family now.And I am sure he realizes his mistake."
"Family?"
"He has a wife apparently. The way his dark eyes which used to be so dull when he left,are sparkling with love now begum. And man in love don't take risk. They have someone to protect. And I didn't wanted to lose my family anymore. He is my brother first,who idolized me from the age he started speaking words. Call me stupid but I want to give him a second chance. A man, a ruler like me is nothing without his family by side."
For his sake I hope I am wrong. I want my instincts to be wrong. Just because his trusts her doesn't mean I will too.
I clutched his face with both my palms. "Oh Rashid."
My eyes widened and my fingers immediately wrapped around my lips in surprise. Was I supposed to call him by his name?
He removed my fingers from my mouth and clutched it softly intertwined between his. He brought them closer to his lips as he left a soft kiss on my fingers making me flinch slightly.
"Say it again."
I was completely dumbfounded.
"Say my name like you just did now again."
I went silent. Say it again? But wasn't I not supposed to call him by his name? Is he challenging him or wanting to hear it again.
"R-rashid?" I said hesitantly. It felt so weird to say his name like that. The heck is wrong with me! I am from 21st century for god's sake! What am I acting so shy for!
"I never want to hear my name from anyone else ever again." He brought my fingers closer to his lips placing a chaste kiss again.
God he is ruining me. Ruining me for every other men. Ruining me so I can never look at anyone again.
"Meet my brother and his wife when you can. Specially his wife,Ainaz. It's a new place for her. If there's some interaction from a lady, she will be comfortable."
Brother. That shitty example of a brother? He must be a kind hearted person but I am not.But I will do it since he wants me to. But I have to be wary of them. God knows what they have planned.
"Won't you ever let me meet your mothers? It doesn't look good that I have been married for more than two months and still haven't meet even one of them."
He sighed deeply still holding my hands in his.
"You can meet my mother. But I don't guarantee that the meeting will be very pleasant. She....she is not what you expect her to be. And Thaani begum is out of question. You are never meeting her. Under no circumstances. You are not even allowed around anywhere near her chamber."
I furrowed my eyebrows.
"But why n-"
"Not further discussion on this topic. You want to meet my mother,you will. I will arrange a meeting soon."
I tried to get up from his lap since he wants to draw an end to conversation anyway but he grabbed my hips making me land on him once again. A gasp left my mouth as I looked at him in surprise.
"I didn't say this conversation is over, I said this particular topic. What a baby you are." He chuckled.
I squinted my eyes together. I hate the word baby because of him now.
"Fine then tell me. Did you like yesterday's menu? I was the one who decided it."
He stopped grinning and his face became all serious at once. The colors of my face went away and I gulped becoming slightly nervous. Was it bad?
"Umm...it was..um" he started looking somewhere else.
"Why won't you tell me already? Whatever it isn't like I cooked it. I just decided the men-"
He bursted out laughing. What the hell?
"The choice of dishes was excellent begum. And don't you think I don't know you choose all meat items. You chose my favorites didn't you?"
"What! Not at all! I just randomly choose the dishes. Something that everyone will like. Why would I bother so much when I don't even know that meat is your favorite thing and you like rice pudding."
He raised his eyebrows as if he was mocking me. Wh- oh. My stupid ass just admitted that I know his favorites.
"You know so much about my favorites for someone who claims to not bother." He caressed the border of my neck and shoulder making me shudder slightly.
"Fine.I know. I asked the royal chef because I wanted to please you." I admitted even though I was embarrassed to my bones.
"Were you?" I added looking at him carefully.
"What?"
"Impressed. Were you impressed by me?" Who cares,I will just ask this for my inner peace. What is wrong with me? Why am I craving to hear him praise me like a little child! Why do I want his validation!
"Bohot hi zyada begum. Itna ki hum aapko taufa dena chahte hain." He still continued to caress my skin.
( Very much begum. So much that I want to reward you with something.)
"Uphar?"
( Gift?)
"Mhm. Bataiye aapne shauhar ko. Kya chahti hain aap?"
( Mhm. Tell your husband. What is it that you want?)
Huh? Was that a big of a deal? A reward is absolutely unnecessary. What I did so big that he wants to reward me. But most importantly what do I even want. I literally have everything I need. What more could I wish for now.
"Do you promise? You will give me anything I want?"
He nods gently.
"Then I want nothing for now. But since you have promised you have to remember it. You will give me anything I ask when time comes."
Oh I am so going to use this in my advantage. I laughed internally.
"Even if I didn't promise you I would still give you everything you want begum. Whatever you want, you just have to name it and it's going to be yours." He pecked the skin he was caressing till now. Just a small one.
Meanwhile my heart started racing and beating fast like a drumroll. How can you say something like this so normally. I don't owe him anything but he looks at me like he is grateful. Like he will really give me anything I want.
He trailed his kisses from my collarbone to my neck. Then the border of my jaw then my chin.
My breath hitched as his kisses were no longer innocent anymore.
"What is this?" My lashes were forced together as I tried to push him away. But that wasn't even an attempt merely.
"Taking something which will keep me going for the rest of the day. The work is getting harder day by day begum."
He kissed my cheeks next stopping finally near my lips. I turned my face away from his.
"I-I haven't even freshened u-up yet."
"And I couldn't care less about it. Come on give your husband what he wants begum." He almost whined turning my face to him cupping my jaw.
"A-and what is it that you w-want?" I asked perplexed.
"This."
He pressed his lips on mine. Gently. The kiss was soft,slow. Like we were savoring this moment. He lips brushed against mine delicately,taking my lower lips between his. I felt a rush of warmth and butterfly tingling in my stomach.
The kiss was only for few seconds but it was enough for me to inhale his breath and essence.
His left my lips looking at me like I am some gift he has to cherish all his life. But again maybe I am only imagining it.
"It's getting quite late. Unfortunately I have to leave even though I want nothing more than staying here,you in my laps. You can sleep a little more as you were awake earlier than usual. Make sure you have breakfast okay?"
I nodded.
He left a soft kiss on my nose before dropping me down on my feets gently. A disappointed noise made its way to my throat but I controlled myself before letting it out.
I watched him leave his study like an abandoned puppy getting left behind.
It's no use of denying anymore. I have come to like him. More than I should have. I should have protected my heart from him. But it's too late now. And as much as I want to be scared about it I am not. In fact I am anything but scared. Nervous maybe but not scared. I am feeling all this bubbly emotions in me right now that I've never felt before.
I feel warm in his arms, I always crave to be in his presence, I want him to touch more, I feel a million butterflies in my body when his skin collides with me and when he kisses me. I want to surrender my everything to him. Both physically and emotionally.
It's dangerous but too late now. I like my husband. More than I would like to admit.
I stand there smiling like a fool. Is this the feeling they describe in books and movies? If it is then I would like to feel it all the time. I exit the study room as my bangles and anklets make soft noises.
I was about to enter the bathing room but a mirror came in my sight portraying my red blushing face. Just like a newly wedded bride. My lips tugged wider looking at my unfiltered reflection.
I like him.
I like my husband.
I like Sultan Rashid Ahmed Khan.
I like this chapter so much!! It's like the soft reflection of someone falling in love. Something we all want to experience apparently. Also we are slowly unraveling secrets!
See you soon on Friday!