Chapter 19
Just like what ma'am Lyka told me earlier, dean asked to have a private conversation with me after my last class. At ngayon, sobrang lakas ng kabog ng dibdib ko habang naghihintay na matapos ang usapan nila ng katawagan niya.
I was sitting on the visitor's chair in front of her table, shaking my knees while playing with my own fngers. She excused herself earlier to answer the call and she's taking a bit long outside.
I snapped when the door opened. I was about to stand up to show respect when she stopped me and told me to just sit. Pumunta na siya sa swivel chair niya at doon naupo.
"I'm sorry for keeping you waiting, medyo napahaba lang yung diskusyon." She said, pertaining to the call.
"Okay lang po." Magalang kong saad. I was really shaking, but I tried so hard to look and sound normal.
"So, ma'am Ella," ipinatong niya ang braso niya sa nesa at pinagsiklop ang mga daliri. "Didiretsuhin na kita. I was shocked by the result of your evaluation. Really. I wasn't expecting it at all." Halata nga sa boses ni dean.
I nodded in agreement.
"This is the first time that you had a low rating from the students. Marami kaming nagulat, actually. Hindi namin 'yon inexpect mula sa'yo. Because you've been a really good, inspiring, and active professor since then." Instead of being strict and intimidating me, she looks like she's with me.
I looked down, both in embarrassment and confusion. Just like them, I was confused too. Alam ko sa sarili ko na ginagawa ko ang lahat para maging maayos at epektibong guro.
Dean sighed. "Ang nakalagay naman sa evaluation sa'yo ng mga bata ay hindi ka raw masyadong pumapasok o nagtuturo last sem, minsan daw mukhang tinatamad ka pa. But I don't see what they see. I always roam around the whole department and observe every class, and I could see that your students are learning. I may not be able to monitor you each class, pero sapat na ang grades ng mga naging estudyante mo para makita kong natuturuan mo nang maayos ang mga bata. These past few weeks na absent ka, naiintindihan ko naman ang nangyari kaya walang kaso sa akin 'yon."
She held my hand that made me look at her. "I will let it slide this time. But always remember that our top priority in this school is our students. Pag nangyari pa ulit 'to, I don't know what I can do anymore."
I sighed in relief and gripped on her hand tight. "Thank you, thank you po, ma'am. I won't waste the chance you gave, I promise."
She smiled and nodded. "Thank you, ma'am Ella. I believe in you."
Umalis ako sa department na magaan ang dibdib. Mabuti na lang talaga at mabait si dean sa amin. She's even more kind and understanding than the other professors who act like superior here, honestly.
Pupuntahan ko muna yung apartment na balak kong lipatan para i-check kung available pa ba. Magpapasama sana ako kay Nads kaya lang may klase pa siya.
While I was walking outside the campus, I felt like someone is following me for a couple of minutes now. I was taking a glance behind me just to check if I wasn't just being overreacting again. Wala pa naman si Ken ngayon.
Kinuha ko ang phone ko at agad na tinawagan si Ken. He wasn't answering again, siguro nagpapahinga. Binilisan ko na lang ang paglalakad ko. I used the footbridge to get to the other side of the road where the apartment is located. I kept calling him again and again especially when I felt that person was still following me. Shit. I think I have to reschedule checking the apartment again.
Nagmamadali akong bumaba sa kabilang side, may mga tao sa paligid kaya hindi naman siguro ako nito susugurin. Tangina, Ken, sumagot ka na, please.
"Ma'am,"
Huminto ako sa paglalakad at hinanap kung saan nanggaling ang nagsalita. When I looked to my left, it was Jom in his car.
"Sabay ko na po kayo." Alok niya.
Pasimple akong luminga sa paligid.
"Pwede ba?"
He nodded. "Of course, ma'am."
Nakahinga ako ng maluwag. "Thank you," I said after entering the shotgun seat. Pinatay ko na rin ang tawag. Buti na lang dumating si Jom.
"Bakit pala nandito ka pa? Kanina pa uwian niyo ah." Tanong ko.
"Tumambay pa po kami ni Lour sa milk tea shop diyan saglit." Sagot niya.
"Ahh," tumango ako. "Uhh, siya nga pala, you can drop me off on Puregold, if madadaanan mo pauwi." I requested. Malapit na rin kasi doon ang condo ni Ken kaya lalakarin ko na lang.
"Doon nga po ang daan ko. Ang layo naman po ng Puregold sa apartment niyo." Nagtataka niyang sabi. Oo nga pala, the last thing he knew is I was still staying in the same apartment before.
"Ah, mag go-grocery kasi ako." Pagsisinungaling ko. "Sayang yung points sa card."
He nodded. "Ahh, sige po."
In the middle of the ride, my phone suddenly rang. Nang tingnan ko kung sino iyon ay si Ken. Kinakabahan kong binabaan ang brightness ng cellphone ko at pilit na itinatago ang username niya dahil sa Instagram siya tumatawag. Hininaan ko ang ringtone ko bago ko ginawang vibrate mode. I won't be able to answer his call for now, kasama ko si Jom.
Nang matigil na ang pag ri-ring ay tumawag na naman siya. Hindi ko ulit iyon sinagot. Mag ta-type pa lang sana ako ng message para sabihing ayos lang ako ay tumawag na naman siya.
"Okay lang, ma'am. Sagutin niyo na po." Ani Jom.
Nahihiya ko siyang nginitian. "Ah, sorry. Sagutin ko lang ah?"
He nodded while smiling.
Sinagot ko na ang tawag at hininaan ang volume kahit na hindi naman naka loudspeaker.
"Hello?"
[Bakit ka tumatawag? Sorry, hindi ko nasagot. Natutulog kasi ako kanina. May nangyari ba?] Sunod-sunod at nag aalala niyang taong.
"Wala, wala. Okay na. Pauwi na ako." I kept my voice casual.
[Sigurado ka?]
"Hmm, ayos na."
[Pero sinundan ka niya?]
"Not really, feeling ko lang."
"Ohh, may checkpoint." Mahinang sabi ni Jom dahilan para tumingin ako sa kalsada. On the right side of the road, there's a checkpoint. "Hinto lang muna tayo saglit, ma'am, ah. May license naman po ako and registered naman yung kotse so no worries. Sorry for interrupting your call." He said.
I nodded. "Okay lang,"
Magsasalita pa sana ulit ako para kausapin si Ken pero nang tingnan ko ang screen ay patay na ang tawag. Nagsalubong na lang ang kilay ko sa pagtataka. Hindi ko na siya tinawagan ulit dahil baka may gagawin na siya o ano.
Nang maibaba na ako ni Jom sa Puregold ay hinintay ko lang siyang makalayo bago ako maglakad papunta sa condo. I sent a message to Ken saying that I'm already here so that he can open the door for me.
I saw a woman carrying big and heavy bags on both of her hands entering the elevator. Nagmamadali akong tumakbo nang pindutin na niya ang floor kung saan siya hihinto. Nang mapansin niyang humahabol ako sa elevator ay pinindot niya ng sunod-sunod ang buton para hindi magsara ang pinto.
I was panting when I entered the elevator. "Thank you," I said with a smile. Ngumiti lang naman siya pabalik at nag bow ng kaunti.
I pressed the eighth floor button and catched my breath. Dalawa lang kaming nakasakay kaya napakatahimik. Napansin ko ang malalaking bag na binaba niya muna, mukhang damit ang laman no'n.
"Bagong lipat ka?" tanong ko.
"Ahh, opo. Hirap nga po maglipat mag isa eh." Then she chuckled. "Kayo po?"
"Dito lang ako nag i-stay pansamantala." Sagot ko.
Tumango siya habang nakangiti.
Ngayon ko lang napansin ang short red hair niya. She's also wearing eyeglasses with a big frame, hindi ko nga lang makita ang itsura niya dahil sa mask niyang suot. Pero base sa boses niya, mukha siyang mahiyain. Kumbaga sa mga palabas, siya yung tipo ng tahimik at mahiyain kung titingnan.
"Ang ganda ng hair color mo." Bati ko sa buhok niya.
Nahihiya siyang ngumiti. "Ay, thank you po, ma'am."
Oo nga pala, naka uniform ako.
The elevator made a bell sound when it stopped on the eighth floor. Eleventh floor pa kasi ang baba niya kaya nauna ako.
"Dito na lang ako ah." Paalam ko sa kaniya.
"Sige po, ma'am-" She looked at my ID with my name boldly printed on it. "Ma'am Mika."
I smiled. "Ma'am Ella," I corrected her.
"Ma'am Ella," she corrected herself too. "Gail po," pagpapakilala niya.
"Nice meeting you, Gail. Bye!"
"Nice meeting you too po. Bye, ma'am!" Paalam niya rin.
After checking the surroundings, I pressed the doorbell and waited. Nang mabuksan na niya ang pinto, pumasok agad ako. Tumalikod naman agad siya at bumalik sa kwarto. Sinundan ko siya doon at ibinaba ang mga gamit sa table niya.
"May lagnat ka pa ba?" Tanong ko.
"Ewan," nahiga siya sa kama ng nakatagilid at ginamit ang cellphone.
Nagsalubong ang kilay ko. "Eh ba't hindi ka nag thermometer?" Nilapitan ko siya at pinakiramdaman ang leeg at noo. "Medyo mainit ka pa. Uminom ka ba ng gamot kaninang tanghali?"
He just hummed.
"Kumain ka?"
He hummed again.
"Anong kinain mo?"
"Tinapay,"
"Tinapay lang?"
"Wala akong gana."
I sighed upon hearing his answer. Sabagay, may point naman siya. Nakakawalang gana nga naman talagang kumain pag may sakit.
That night, I cooked food for us. Nagluto ako ng may sabaw para mainitan ang tiyan niya. I also told him to have a quick hot shower, para maginhawaan ang pakiramdam niya. Sinunod naman niya ako.
Once he settled here in his bed, I sat next to him and gave him the medicine. I stayed here for a while since I've been staying here even before he went to shower. I was checking some group chats of my students to see if they have a question or what.
"Teka lang, labas din ako mamaya." I told him without taking off my eyes on my phone. Hindi naman ako nakarinig ng kahit ano mula sa kaniya. Basta nahiga na lang siya.
Antok na antok na ako at bibigay na ang mga mata ko lao na at nakahiga na ako sa kama. Tumagilid ako ng higa at nag respond sa mga message sa GC hanggang sa makakaya ng powers ko.
Naalimpungatan ako ng gising sa hindi malamang dahilan. I can feel something warm on my back, and something a bit heavy on my waist. When I opened my eyes, I realized that I was sleeping on Ken's bed. And shit, he was hugging me from behind!
My eyes widened in the sudden realization. Hindi ko naman magawang gumalaw dahil nakapatong rin ang binti niya sa binti ko. I was caged in his arms. Nagsitaasan ang mga balahibo ko nang maramdaman ko ang ilong niya sa ulo ko. He blew out an air and I could feel his breathing on my scalp.
Shit, shit. My heart was racing. It was pounding so hard that it woke up all of my senses. Something unexplainable was happening inside my stomach. Tangina, kinilig yung kiffy ko.
I don't know what should I do. Hindi ko magawang umalis o gumalaw man lang mula sa pwesto ko. Paulit-ulit akong huminga ng malalim para pakalmahin ang sarili. I closed my eyes and sighed deeply. Inabot ko na lang ang kumot at inangat hanggang sa leeg ko. It feels warm and comfortable that I felt sleepy again. I closed my eyes again and nudged my back to him. Then my eyes automatically dropped and I fell asleep again.
"Kael,"
Pakiramdam ko ay nananaginip ako at may tumatawag sa pangalan ko. Pero nang maramdaman ko ang mahinang pagyugyog sa balikat ko ay kumunot ang noo ko
"Kael,"
That was Ken's voice. It was deep, throaty, just like how he sounds like after waking up. What does he want? I still want to sleep. Wala naman akong pasok ngayong araw dahil weekend.
Mas nilapit ko pa ang katawan ko sa yakap kong unan tsaka ako ng concentrate sa pagtulog. Iyon nga lang, pakiramdam ko ay parang may mali. Nang buksan ko ang mga mata ko, nag angat ako ng tingin. Nagsalubong ko si Ken na kanina pa pala nakatingin sa akin. I wasn't hugging a pillow, it was Ken that I'm hugging!
Nanlaki ang mga mata ko at dali-dali akong bumangon. I gulped in embarrassment. I couldn't look back at him.
"U-Uhm, m-magluluto na 'ko." Sabi ko na lang tsaka ako dali-daling lumabas ng kwarto.
Pagkasara ko sa pinto ay sumandal ako sa dingding at hinabol ang hininga. Shit, nakakahiya. Bakit ba naman kasi hindi ka pa umalis kagabi eh, nagising ka na nga! Tangina, this is really embarrassing! Fuck, we're like a couple cuddling on their sleep.
I shook my head and pulled myself together. Nagluto na lang ako at pilit na winaksi sa isipan ang mga tumatakbo sa utak ko kanina. Patapos na akong maluto nang marinig ko ang paglabas niya sa kwarto. Now, I feel the awkwardness around us again.
"Uhm, sakto, tapos na 'ko magluto." I said to break the awkward air.
"Ayusin ko na yung lamesa." Tumayo agad siya para kumuha ng plato at kutsara't tinidor.
Saktong pagkatapos niyang ayusin ang mesa ay naisalin ko na rin sa mangkok ang noodles, at sa plato naman ang tocino at dalawang sunny side up.
"Kape?" I asked him.
"Sige," bakas ang tuwa sa boses niya.
I gave him his coffee that he stirred immediately.
"May lagnat ka pa?" Tanong ko nang makaupo na kami pareho. Inangat ko ang kamay ko para pakiramdaman ang noo at leeg niya. Hindi naman siya gumalaw at hinayaan lang ako.
"May lagnat pa 'ko?" Balik niya sa tanong ko.
Nilayo ko na ang kamay ko. "Ewan ko, hindi naman ako thermometer." Sagot ko.
"Ba't hinahawakan mo pa 'ko?" Tanong niya.
"Tinitingnan ko nga kung mainit ka pa. Kunin mo na lang tung thermometer para sure." Utos ko sa kaniya.
Tinatamad siyang tumayo at pumunta sa kwarto. Pagbalik niya ay inabot niya agad sa 'kin iyon at nagsimula na siyang kumain. I told him to take off his hoodie so he could put the thermometer on his armpits. Tanging sando na lang ang suot niya ngayon.
He was eating while staring at nowhere with the thermometer on his armpits. The corner of my lips rose up a bit. Para akong nag aalaga ng bata. Well, he told me that he only has an older sister back in Zamboanga. He must be the spoiled youngest boy in the family back in their province, just like my younger sister.
Kumakain kami nang tumunog ang thermometer. Kinuha niya iyon at tiningnan.
"37 sakto."
I nodded. "Normal temperature na lang 'yan. Uminom ka pa rin ng gamot para sigurado."
After eating breakfast, he washed the dishes while I broomed and mopped the floor.
"Aalis ka ba?" Tanong niya sa 'kin matapos niyang mag hugas.
"Hindi, dito lang ako. May mga gagawin lang akong school related."
"Sige, dito lang ako sa studio."
"Baka mabinat ka ha."
"Hindi, ako pa." Aniya na parang bata na nangungumbinsi ng nanay na palabasin siya para maglaro.
Tumango ako. "Hm, sige."
Habang nasa studio siya, nasa sala naman ako. Nakaupo sa carpet, kaharap ang laptop at mga papel na nakapatong sa center table. Binuksan ko ang TV at nag patugtog sa YouTube, maganda kasi ang tunog ng speakers na naka-connect doon. Hindi ko masyadong nilakasan dahil baka makaistorbo ako kay Ken.
And tell me now
"How do I live without you?
I want to know
How do I breathe without you?
If you ever go
How do I ever, ever survive
How do I, how do I, oh how do I live"
Sumasabay ako sa kantahabang nag che-check ng quiz at nag re-record ng score. I was still singing when I suddenly heard a door opened, napahinto tuloy ako sa pagkanta. Nang lumingon ako ay nakita ko si Ken na nakasilip sa pinto ng studio.
"Ay, malakas ba?" Tukoy ko sa tugtog. Kinuha ko agad ang remote para hinaan ang volume. "Sorry, sorry."
Umiling siya. "Hindi, okay lang. Sumilip lang ako." Sagot niya.
Tumango na lang ako. Hindi ko na nilakasan ulit yung volume dahil baka nahihiya lang siyang sabihin na ang lakas na nga ng tugtog, sinasabayan ko pa. Sinara na ulit niya ang pinto pero may kaunting awang iyon. Nag focus na lang ulit ako sa ginagawa habang mahinang kumakanta.
Nang matapos na ako sa ginagawa ay naood na lang ako ng random videos sa YouTube habang nakahiga sa couch. Tsaka ko lang napansin na account pala ni Ken sa YouTube ang naka sign in dito, yung maraming subscribers? Tapos kung ano-anong pinapanood ko, shet.
Napadaan ako sa channel nila as a group. I also saw some fan edits of them. I got curious so I watched some of their vlogs, music videos, interviews, and some other videos that I find interesting. Minsan ay napapa-what na lang ako dahil sa ugali ni Ken sa mga video na 'to. I've never saw him smile widely and talk a lot in person, kahit na magkasama naman kami araw-araw.
Iba kasi talaga pag komportable ka sa mga tao sa paligid mo, naipapakita mo ang totoong ikaw.
When I saw their dance practice videos, I feel like dancing too. Parang gusto ko ulit matuto ng bagong sayaw at mag perform. And damn, Ken's swag is on top. Napaka swabe niyang gumalaw. Main dancer, he is.
I stumbled upon an electric guitar tutorial pinanood ko iyon kahit wala naman akong instrumentong hawak. Napalingon ako kay Ken nang lumabas siya sa studio. He was looking at the video that I'm watching while walking towards the bathroom to pee, I guess. Pagkalabas niya ay tumingin ulit siya sa TV.
"Marunong ka niyan?" Tanong niya.
Umiling ako. "Hindi nga eh."
"Turuan kita." Alok niya. "Madali lang naman 'yan basta alam mo gumamit ng acoustic."
My mood lit up. "Talaga?"
Tumango siya. "Hmm, tara."
Agad kong pinatay ang TV at sumunod sa kaniya. Binuksan miya ang pinto at pinauna akong pumasok. He put his right palm on my back to guide me but I pushed his hand away.
"Yuckkk! Nag hugas ka ba?!" Nandidiri kong tanong.
Bakas ang pagtataka sa mukha niya. "Ha?"
"Umihi ka 'di ba? Hinawak mo 'yan sa ano mo tas ihahawak mo sa 'kin." Tukoy ko sa kamay niya. "Maghugas ka do'n!" Utos ko.
Kinunotan niya 'ko ng noo. "Luh. Over acting ka ah, over action." Aniya habang tinuturo ako.
I crossed my arms on my chest and gave him an irritated look. Bago siya tuluyang lumabas ay pabiro pa niyang nilapit sa 'kin ang mga kamay niya kaya napaatras ako.
"Keeennn!"
Tumatawa naman siyang lumabas at dumiretso sa lababo.
"Ken, hugas ah, hindi basa! Mag sabon ka!" Sigaw ko mula sa kwarto.
"Opo!" Sagot niya sa tono ng batang pagod na sa utos ng nanay pero walang magawa kundi ang sumunod.
Pagbalik niya dito ay inangat niya ang magkabila niyang kamay para ipakita sa 'kin.
"'Yan ah, dalawang kamay pa." Pagmamayabang niya.
"Aba, dapat lang." Sagot ko agad. Hindi na ako nakaiwas nang ipahid niya sa pisngi ko ang kamay niyang namamasa-masa pa. "Ken!" Hinampas ko siya sa likod. Tumatawa naman siyang naupo sa gaming chair niya.
"Tara na nga," aniya.
He took his white electric guitar and played random songs. Hinatak ko naman ang maliit na round stool at naupo sa tabi niya. He was telling me about the basics of playing an acoustic guitar while I was just staring at him, on his face specifically. I suddenly remembered the realization that I had earlier while watching their videos. Ngayon lang siya nakipag biruan nang ganun sa akin. Ngayon ko lang siya nakita at narinig na humagikgik na parang batang nakikipaglaro. My lips formed a small smile.
"Gets mo ba?"
"Ha?" Umayos ako ng upo at umiwas saglit ng tingin. "Ano ulit?"
"Sabi ko, magkaiba yung technique ng acoustic sa electric. Magkaiba kasi yung sound nila." Paliwanag niya. "Try mo," he handed me the guitar.
Ingat na ingat akong humawak doon. It was heavier than the acoustic one, nakakatakot tuloy gamitin o kahit hawakan man lang. Ang mahal siguro nito.
He taught me the basic techniques on strumming because it sounded bad when I tried it. He was right, mabuti na lang at marunong ako gumamit ng acoustic.
"Keyboard? Gusto mo i-try?" May hinatak siya sa ilalim ng mesa niya at doon nakapatong ang keyboard.
Tiningnan ko lang siya gamit ang nangungusap na mga mata. Nakakahiya umoo pero hindi ko naman magawang tumanggi dahil gusto ko rin subukan.
"Dito ka, palit tayo." He said when he finally get my answer with my expression.
I sat on the gaming chair this time.
"Ano bang kaya mong tugtugin? Kahit basic lang." Tanong niya.
"Uhm," I tried pressing the keyboard first to find the right tune, and then I started playing Happy Birthday to You using only my index finger.
Natatawa ko siyang nilingon. He was smiling too wile laughing a bit.
"Twinkle Twinkle Little Star," aniya.
I started playing it and then we both laughed.
"Atleast may alam kang basic." He said on the other hand. "Ganito 'yan, syempre may chords din..."
I listened attentively to every detail that he says. When he started to teach me how the chords are played with different fingers at the same time, he pulled the chair to get closer to me. I gulped because of the lack of space between us. I cleared my throat and focused on the keyboard instead.
We spent the afternoon together inside that studio. We were so immersed by the instruments that we lost track of time. Tsaka na lang kami ulut tumingin sa oras nang magsalita si Ken.
"Nagugutom ako," he said out of nowhere.
When we checked the time, it was almost five in the afternoon already.
"Anong mas prefer mo matutunan? Electric guitar o keyboard?" Tanong niya.
"Hmm," sandali akong nag isip. "Gitara,"
"Sige, bukas ulit, turuan kita."
I smiled. "Tara, merienda muna tayo."
Pinauna niya ulit akong lumabas sa kwarto. Dumiretso kami pareho sa kusina para maghanap ng makakain. Busy akong nakatingala sa hanging cabinet habang nag iisip nang bigla na lang siyang pumunta sa gilid ko at may inabot mula sa taas. Madali lang niyang nakuha ang mayonnaise at isang can ng tuna flakes. Nung ako kasi ang nag ayos no'n, gumamit pa ako ng upuan para tungtungan.
"Ito na lang," he also got the loaf bread.
"Sige, akin na." I took a bowl and spoon for the mayo. "Hugasan mo muna yung ibabaw ng lata." Utos ko na agad naman niyang sinunod.
He was just watching me the whole time. Nang mahalo ko na ang mayo at tuna ay dinala na niya iyon sa mesa habang ako naman ay naghugas ng kamay. He was putting the tuna spread on top of the bread. I thought it was his but he gave it to me.
I smiled. "Thank you,"
"Sarap," he said whole munching on it.
"Nakakamiss din yung ganito paminsan-minsan 'no?"
He nodded. "Naalala ko noon, si ate yung nag introduce sa 'kin nito. Sarap na sarap ako, kaya lang minsan ko lang din matikman. Alam mo na, sa bukid, parang pang sosyal yung mayonnaise tsaka tuna. Sardinas lang kami eh, lagyan ng sibuyas tsaka suka." Kwento niya.
I chuckled. "Same! Ang sarap nun! Nakakamiss. Parang gusto ko tuloy."
"Mamaya," he suggested.
"Mamaya?" I asked with excitement.
"Hmm, para 'di ka na magluluto."
"Sige!" Sagot ko agad. Mukhang mapaparami ako ng kain nito.
While we were eating, he suddenly hummed like he just remembered something.
"May ipapatikim ako sa'yo."
He went to the kitchen and sliced some bananas and put it into a bowl. He also put a few scoops of milo before mixing it. Bitbit ang dalawang mangkok ay bumalik na siya sa tabi ko.
"Ano 'to?" Tanong ko.
"Masarap 'yan. Lagi kong ginagawa 'yan nung bata ako." Tsaka siya tumikim ng gawa niya.
Of course I tried it, and it tastes good. It's not so special but like he said, kids will like it.
"Hilig mo sa matamis 'no?" Kahit sa kape.
"Hmm, medyo." Hindi pa siya sure sa lagay na 'yon.
After eating, we took turns to take a bath. Mabilis lang na lumubog ang araw kaya oras na naman ng hapunan. After taking a short shower, I found Ken laying on his front in the bed while playing on his phone.
"Winner, winner, chicken dinner!" He even said.
I saw Kuro walking towards the bed so I carried him on my arms. Nang nasa tabi na ako ng kama ay bigla na lang siyang tumalon at nag landing sa likod ni Ken.
"Aw! Kuro, ang bigat mo." Tumabi sa kaniya ang alaga at nahiga ng patihaya. Hinaplos naman niya ang tiyan ng pusa.
Nahiga ako sa kabilang gilid ng kama at ginamit ang cellphone.
"Matutulog ka na?" He asked.
"Maya-maya,"
"Sige, labas na rin ako mamaya."
I want to tell him to stay hut I don't know how. I don't want to build another awkward moment between us so I'm being careful with my words and actions. Pwede naman kasi siyang matulog rin dito sa kama para hindi na siya nahihirapan sa couch eh.
We were both quiet while using our own phone. He was playing while I was scrolling on social media. After a while, he spoke.
"Oo nga pala, anong pagalan mo sa Facebook?" He asked. "Hindi kita pwedeng i-followback sa IG, makikita ng mga tao. Kaya sa Facebook na lang."
"Eto oh," pinakita ko sa kaniya ang account name ko na agad niyang sinearch. He sent me a friend request that I immediately confirmed.
"Uy, ten na." He turned off his phone and laid on his back.
I gasped. "Oo nga pala, freedom of speech hour." Pinatay ko ang phone ko at tumingin sa kaniya. "Ako muna?"
He nodded.
"Wala akong maisip na pwedeng sabihin. Siguro thank you na lang sa pagtuturo sa 'kin ng instruments kanina." I said with a smile. "Ikaw?"
"Hmm, actually, wala rin akong gustong sabihin. Pero may tanong ako."
I nodded. "Ano 'yon?"
"Kahapon," he looked away. "Nung umuwi ka, may kasama ka?" Nagdadalawang isip niyang tanong.
"Ahh, oo. Sumabay ako sa estudyante ko. Kahapon kasi pakiramdam ko may sumusunod sa akin kaya nga kita tinatawagan. Mabuti na lang nakita ako nung estudyante ko at inalok ako na sumabay. Hindi na ako tumanggi para safe. Don't worry, hindi naman ako dito mismo nagpababa." Paliwanag ko.
Tumango siya. "Hmm,"
"Ano pa?"
"Wala na,"
"Sure?"
He nodded again.
"Hm, sige."
Bumangon na siya. "Labas na 'ko." Paalam niya.
He was about to stand when I held his arm to stop him. I gulped because of my sudden action. Nang lingunin niya 'ko ay nagtataka siya.
"D-Dito ka na lang." I stuttered. "I-I mean, medyo malaki naman yung kama mo a-and, and para na rin hindi ka na mahirapan matulog sa couch. Kasya naman tayo dito eh. Nakakahiya na kasi talaga sa'yo, ikaw naman ang may ari nito."
Hindi agad siya nakasagot pero nanatili siyang nakatingin sa akin.
"I mean, if it's okay with you, of course. Pwede namang ako na lang ang matulog sa couch. I mean, yeah, about earlier this morning, I'm sorry about that. Hindi ko naman sinasadya-"
Umiling siya. "It's fine, no need to apologize." He tilted his head. "Okay lang ba sa'yo?" Tukoy niya sa kama.
Tumango ako. "O-Oo, oo naman." Kumuha ako ng isang unan at nilagay iyon sa pagitan namin. "Kasya naman tayo, 'di ba?" I told him wth a nervous smile.
After a while of being quiet, he nodded. "Sige,"
Nahiga na ulit sya sa kabilang gilid ng kama. We were using the same blanket since it's big enough to cover the both of us.
"Okay lang ba kung patayin ko 'to?" Tukoy ko sa lampshade sa tabi ko.
"Hm, much better." He answered.
When I turned off the lampshade, we were left with only the moon as our light. Parehas kaming nakatitig sa kisame, I can feel that he's not sleeping yet.
"Uhm, may pupuntahan ka ba bukas?" Tanong ko.
"Wala naman. Ikaw?"
"Wala rin."
He didn't respond.
"S-Sige," it was so awkward to end our conversation. "G-Goodnight," I guess.
He sighed deeply. "Goodnight,"
And we were left with quietness after that. Tinalikuran ko siya ng higa at binaluktot ang mga binti tsaka nag concentrate matulog. Remembering how our day went today, I slept with a smile.
...
Ken's POV
Kanina pa salubong ang kilay ko mula noong pinatay ko ang tawag ni Kael. Ma'am, huh. Is that a student? Or a co-teacher? Pero base sa boses ng kausap niya, mukhang bata pa. So I assume he's a student. Ano yun? Hinatid siya? She didn't even call me back when I hung up, tss.
I couldn't sleep that night, pakiramdam ko kasi may kulang. I was used to doing her so-called freedom of speech hour but we didn't got to do it since we're both tired. She's tired from work, and it's normal for me to be tired since I'm sick.
Nagising na lang ako na nakahiga sa kama at nakayakap sa akin si Kael. Nakapatong pa nga ang binti niya sa binti ko at nakasiksik ang mukha sa gilid ng katawan ko.
Of course, my initial reaction was shock. But I didn't move or anything, I'm afraid I might wake her up. What I did was stare at her while sleeping comfortably and enjoying my body's warmth.
I was gulping while staring at her. I can't help but to fix his long hair since it was scattered around. Even though the sheets and the pillows smells like me, her scent still lingers in my nose. It was coming from her hair. Out of curiosity, I slowly brought my nose closer to her head and sniffed her scent with my eyes closed.
I quickly pulled my face away when she suddenly moved. Mas lalo pa siyang lumapit sa katawan ko at bumuga ng malalim na hininga. Fuck, sumasakit na ang dibdib ko sa lakas ng kabog no'n.
I stayed in my position for a while and waited for her to wake up on her own. But after a while, there was no sign of her waking up. And I badly need to use the comfort room.
Kaya wala na akong nagawa kundi ang gisingin siya. Embarrassment was evident in her voice when she went out, ni-hindi nga siya nakatingin sa akin.
That's why I was hesitant earlier to agree with her suggestion to sleep on the same bed with her. We just had a good day today and I don't want to be awkward around her again.
Remembering her singing voice earlier, I smiled. She has such a good voice. And everytime I hear a nice voice like hers, I automatically think of a song that fits. Kaya ako nakakabuo ng collaboration with other great artists.
She's a fast learner. Even though I wasn't good at teaching and explaining things, she still gets my point.
I chuckled when I remembered her reaction earlier when I wiped my hands on her cheeks. Honestly, I was shocked with my sudden action earlier. I wasn't usually like that, especially if I'm not comfortable with the people around me. But I don't know. As day passes, I slowly get to uncover the real me around her.
Nang mapansin kong tulog na siya, nilingon ko ang ulo ko para tingnan siya. She was facing me this time while hugging the pillow that she put between us. I brought my hand to fix her hair before pulling the blanket to cover her body up to her shoulder. I looked at her for a moment before sighing and finally sleeping. Today was great, Kael.
I woke up feeling warm, not just because of the blanket that's covering me, but also because of somebody's warmth. When I opened my eyes, I realized our position. Our bodies are so close together while hugging each other. Nakaunan siya sa braso ko at nakapatong ang braso sa bewang ko.
I gulped and didn't moved a muscle. I felt her yawning before looking up at me. When our eyes met, she smiled. I was catching my breath. It felt like I was in a race. She moved her head closer to my chest and sighed in satisfaction, she tightened her hug around my back then she fell asleep again.
Paulit-ulit akong lumunok. I bet she could hear my chest violently beating. This is very unusual. I know something is definitely going on.
Shit, I'm doomed.
____________________
Hulaan niyo sino gigitarahin next. (✋🏻🤞🏻)
Ano* pala. 😁
- Nath(Nahhhlia)