Khushi
"I don't want to ruin Jiji's baby shower. So, please stay away from me." I looked into his eyes as soon as I finished, then turned away and gripped the countertop before sighing through my nose... Main kya dhund rahi thi?...
I looked around the pile of food and food packets as I tried to think about what I was looking for, but my mind had gone completely blank with anger... Just because I still love him doesn't mean that I'll continue to bow to his every demand. Isn't it enough that I'm civil every time we meet?
I sighed as my shoulders slumped down, and I leaned a little ahead to see if there was anything behind the boxes.
Nothing... What was I looking for, Devi Maiya?...
"Khushi?" I closed my eyes. Why does he have to do this every time we see each other? Because of him, I can't even think of visiting Jiji peacefully because what if we end up meeting... He'll again say the same things he has been repeating for the past six years. And I can't... I just can't... I try to forget what he does, but he never lets me. He...
I sighed, then took a breath before opening my eyes and turning to face him.
"I know that you..." He started slowly and unsurely. Just like every time.
"No, you don't." I interrupted as I looked into his eyes and slightly shook my head in denial. "If you had known anything about me or what I wanted, then you wouldn't have been repeating the same thing, like how much you love me or how much you want to be together again." I paused for a split of a second. "The truth is, all that matters to you is how you feel and what you want. That's all that ever mattered, even when we were forced to live together and even now when I want nothing to do with you."
I felt a sudden rush of heat on my face and body, and I looked down. Calm down... It's okay; it's okay; calm down. You got it covered. It's completely fine.
"But I love you..." I snapped my head up to look at him as soon as I heard it.
I huffed out a laugh before shaking my head, and I again started to look for the laddo.
Right, I was looking for the laddo. I came here to look for laddos for Jiji.
"Khushi, I really..."
Found it.
"Please..."
Hopefully, Jiji will be able to eat now.
"Listen," I said, then turned to him again with the container in hand. "I don't want you. I might've loved you once, but I don't want you. So, please, stop this. Because forcing your feelings on me is literally harassment... Please don't force me to do something I don't want to do."
I was almost out of the kitchen when he, in a small voice, spoke up again: "You're my wife!"
I saw almost everyone at the dining table ahead looking at the kitchen while whispering to each other every now and then.
"Did you register the contract marriage?" I asked before turning to him with the steel container in my hands.
He didn't answer.
"I thought so!" I nodded. "Since we're not actually married, there's no point in calling me your wife. But," He looked at me with hope as I paused. "For my own mental satisfaction, I sent divorce papers, which you didn't sign. But I did, okay?" I shook my head in question but didn't wait for him to answer and returned to the table.
"Here! Your laddo!" I placed the container loudly in front of Jiji. "Have as much as you want, okay?"
Then I went back to my seat next to Nanhe Ji and finished eating with a smile fixed on my face. Because I'm done.
Because this ends here.
Because I'm happy for the first time in years.
And I intend to keep it like that!