Writer's Pov.
Malfoy Manor.
Draco was not crying, wasn't reacting, his brain was not registering it. He was lying on the ground looking at his mother's tombstone with no expression on his face. He didn't know what to do, how to react, what to say.
He felt someone kneeling near him saying something to him but he didn't recognize the voice. He laid, on the ground, for minutes maybe hours.
His mother, his only family, the person he loved the most, was dead, she was no more with him. He failed to protect her. He failed to fulfill his promise to provide a good life for her. He failed in every step of his life. Why was he alive when his mother was no more? Why was he breathing when his mother had stopped?
He tried to move but was too weak. His body felt so weak that even trying to move was giving him pain. He wanted to react to the reality but even his cries won't be able to express his pain. The only person, for whom he was alive, for whom he took all the assaults yet never committed suicide was dead. She was dead. Gone Forever.
And he was not even present when she died when she took her last breath. He wasn't there for his mother, who was the only person who loved him.
"Draco?"
"Please say something?"
"Please react you are scaring me."
"Draco." Harry shook his body as Draco was lying on the ground for minutes and wasn't reacting at all. Harry was scared for Draco and he wanted him to at least react, at least get his feelings out.
Harry slowly picked up Draco's head and adjusted him on his lap. He wrapped his arms around his shoulder and hugged him tightly.
"Please react, Draco. Please say something." Harry pleaded as he teared up seeing Draco's condition.
Draco looked up at Harry with an expressionless face. "Kill me, please?" Draco pleaded with no expression however his voice was filled with pain.
"Don't say that, Draco."
"I have no reason to live. Please put an end to my pain and suffering?"
"No, you have to live for yourself, for me."
"Use your wand and kill me please?" Draco didn't hear Harry and was saying things as if he were in some trance.
Harry cupped Draco's face and said softly. "Draco, even though I am an orphan, even though I don't have a family I am still alive because I have friends, who love me just like a family. You also have friends who love you, you have me. I love you Draco and I am not going to let you go."
Draco was not registering Harry's words as he was in a very different mental state.
"She said I have to be okay for her and she needs me in her life. I fulfilled my promise. I stayed alive for her after all the tortures but she betrayed me. She left me alone in this cruel world." Draco murmured.
"Alone all alone. No No, this world will eat me alive. I can't take anything anymore. I want to die. I need to die. I don't want to live. I have no reasons." Draco started speaking frantically as he pushed Harry's arms away from his body and tried to stand up.
Harry immediately held his shoulders and brought him down in his arms. Harry couldn't let Draco go, he was dangerous to himself.
Draco panicked as arms wrapped around his body from behind.
"Leave me, leave me." He shouted as he tried his best to get out of the person's hold.
"Draco, it's me, Harry. I am not going to harm you." Harry said as Draco was desperately trying to get out of his hold.
"No more pain. No no. Leave me. Let me die. My mother is waiting for me. I need to go to her. I need to hug her and cry in her arms. Let me go." Draco used all his force to get out however Harry was stronger than him.
"Please, Draco. I am not letting you go. Just cry it out, I am here to hold you."
"Kill me, please kill me, just kill me. I want to go to my mother. Kill me please."
Draco kept saying things without realizing what he was saying. It felt like he was in a trance. Harry was getting worried for him. It felt like Draco was losing himself. He was losing his mental stability. Harry had to get him out of it but what shall he do? Maybe he just needed to slap him back to reality but Draco would never trust Harry again if he raised his hand on him. He had to do something else.
Harry took out a vial of potion from his robes. It was sleeping draught. He took a deep breath, wrapped an arm around Draco's chest keeping him in place, and with the other hand he forced the draught down his mouth. Draco trembled as he realized what happened and he looked at Harry.
"It's just a sleeping draught," Harry said immediately Draco felt his eyes getting heavier and he fell asleep in his arms. Harry looked at his face and caressed his cheek softly.
"I am sorry, Draco," Harry murmured while cupping his face. He placed a kiss on his forehead and hugged him.
After a few minutes, he took some deep breaths and apparated to their house. He picked Draco up in his arms and brought him to his bedroom as he wanted Draco close to him. He changed his clothes quickly and lay beside Draco. He brought Draco near him in his arms. He hugged him tightly and caressed his back.
....
Grimmauld Place.
Draco opened his eyes and felt himself being tightly held by someone. He widened his eyes as he looked around and realized that it was not his bedroom but then he then he sighed in relief as he realized that he was in Harry's bedroom, in his arms.
'Whatever happened was just a nightmare, right? Of course, it never happened in reality. My mother is alive and it was just a nightmare. But why did it feel so true?' Draco thought as he tried to register his reality.
Draco lay there in silence thinking about his worst dream. The more he thought about it the more he started to accept the reality. He knew it was not a dream, it was his reality, his mother had left him forever in this cruel world. He was left alone in this world. Slowly, his mind started to clear and he registered his reality and a scream of disbelief, of pain left his mouth.
Harry woke up with a jerk and saw him crying, shouting for his mother. He immediately held Draco in his arms.
"Just cry it out, Draco." He murmured while holding Draco close as he cried for the loss.
...
Draco was lying lifelessly on Harry and he was caressing his head softly. He stopped crying and shouting an hour back, having no more energy left in his body. He was feeling so much pain in his chest but he had no energy left to cry. He was just lying on the bed almost on top of Harry trying to accept the most painful truth of his life. The pain he got from a year of assaults was nothing in front of what he was feeling right now.
"Draco?" Harry broke the silence as he wanted him to speak.
"Why did you lie?" Draco asked in a low tone.
"I am sorry but I had no other option. You were already broken and I didn't want to break you more."
Draco stayed silent and Harry continued. "Let me confess the whole truth. I am an Auror, the Auror team got a lead regarding a few fled death eaters who were running a human trafficking racket and after a few days of researching, we found out their location and raided it. While raiding, I got to a secret room where you were kept. I fought with your assaulters and brought you to St Mungos. This is the whole truth."
"And my mum?" Draco whispered.
"She...she." Harry didn't know what to say. He didn't want to tell the truth but also didn't want to lie to him again.
Draco looked up at him. "I don't want another lie, Harry. Don't break my trust again."
"Your kidnappers not only kidnapped you but also made up a story that you died in your cell. Your mother believed in it and she committed suicide." Harry said with his eyes shut tightly.
Draco heard this and remained silent. He didn't know how to react to this. His mother died because he was dead. She died for him, to meet him again. But he was still alive which meant his mother was waiting for him.
"She is waiting for me," Draco murmured and got up from the bed before Harry could react. He ran down the stairs, towards the kitchen. He heard Harry's yells and even his footsteps behind but he didn't care. He picked up a knife kept in the drawer and without thinking twice he attacked his wrist.
One
Two
Three Deep cuts before Harry snatched the knife and threw it away. Draco slid down the wall on the floor and looked at the cuts with a smile on his lips as he murmured. 'I am coming to you, mum.' And darkness took over his senses.
St Mungos.
"Is he okay?" Harry asked worriedly to Healer Helena the moment she got out of the room where Draco was being treated.
Helena gave a small firm nod before walking away and within a few minutes, she came back followed by another healer and they went into Draco's room.
"Calm down, Harry," Hermione spoke and kept her right arm on Harry's shoulder.
Harry started pacing back and forth with his hands shaking in fear. He couldn't lose Draco, he could not afford to lose him. It would just shatter him if anything happened to Draco.
"It is my fault, only and only my fault that Draco is in such a condition," Harry murmured.
"It's not your fault," Ron said to his best friend the moment he heard him blaming himself for Draco's condition.
"We already knew that he would react in such a way," Hermione said.
"I failed to protect him," Harry said in a low and shaky voice.
"You are the reason he is still alive," Ron said and forwarded Harry a calming draught.
"Don't Ron, this is the third time you are giving him a calming draught. That's not good for his body." Hermione said however Harry drank it immediately and she sighed in anger.
"Stop behaving like this, Harry. He is Draco Malfoy and I am not going to let you harm yourself because of him." Hermione said angrily. She was sympathetic toward Draco and she wanted him to heal but not at her best friend's cost. "Ever since he stepped in your life, two and half months back, you are ruining your mental health for him. Why is he affecting you so much? Why is his pain affecting you so much? Why are you behaving like this, Harry?"
"Because I like him. I have feelings for him way stronger than I have ever felt for anyone and I am not going to let him go. I won't let him die. I need him in my life. Got your answers?" Harry replied with equal anger stunning both his best friends.
They knew that Harry was way more protective towards Draco however they never thought that he liked Draco. This piece of information shocked them.
Harry again started pacing in the corridor. He was not able to erase the memory of Draco cutting his wrist and falling unconscious. He was devastated at the sight. He thought he lost Draco forever but he was alive. Harry healed him as much as he could before bringing him to ST Mugos, where Helena and another healer were treating him.
After a few minutes, Helena stepped out of the room followed by the second healer and Harry walked towards them.
"Is he okay?" Harry asked.
"His wrist injury is completely healed and we have given him a strength potion and blood replenishing potion for the blood loss. He is completely out of danger, there is nothing to worry about. However, his mental health is deteriorating due to which he harmed himself." Helena said.
"I know and I am trying my best to help him as much as I can. I have asked him to consult a mind healer but he is still scared of humans."
"Hm, we understand but he must be mentally strong," Helena said and looked at the second healer who nodded yes and said. "Especially in his condition."
"What condition? What's wrong with him?" Harry asked worriedly.
"We would like to inform you and Mr Malfoy together." Said the second healer.
Helena asked Harry to get in the room.
"Can they join us?" Asked Harry pointing towards Ron and Hermione.
"Yeah, no problem," Helena replied after a minute of silence.
They all stepped into the room where Draco was lying on the bed, unconscious. Harry walked towards Draco, sat on a chair beside his bed, and held his hand in his.
"He is still unconscious," Harry murmured while caressing the back of his hand.
The second healer used her wand and cast 'Rennervate' on Draco and he slowly opened his eyes. He felt weakness in his whole body. He looked around and saw Harry's eyes on him.
"You are not going to do that again," Harry warned him in a whisper looking hurt by Draco's action.
"I don't want to live," Draco murmured back while looking into his eyes.
"I am not letting you go, Draco," Harry whispered and placed a kiss on his knuckles.
"We want to inform you something, Mr. Malfoy," Said Helena, and everyone in the room paid attention to Helena.
She said softly. "Mr Malfoy, you are........"
To be continued...
BY J.