"I'm so glad you're back!" you squeezed Bucky tightly around his waist.
"Me too" He chuckled lightly.
Bucky had just gotten back from a 2-week long mission, and you were excited to spend some time with your boyfriend of four months.
It was new for you both. You had met Bucky at a bookstore and hit it off when you both reached for the same fantasy book, and you got to talking. You knew who he was, going out on missions with Sam, the new Captain America but you never minded his past or what he does for a living.
Bucky had told you all about his past. You knew some of the things he did in his past from reading about him online, but some things he told you about weren't common knowledge. You were happy he trusted you enough to talk about things from his past with you.
You learned all about Steve Rogers and their friendship, the Howling Commandos, and what life was like back in the day, and you found it all fascinating. You never pushed Bucky to speak about his history. He had a therapist he was ordered to see, and as much as he grumbled about it, you thought it was helping him. The only thing that bothered you was the fact that Bucky had a hard time expressing his feelings.
Sure, he would smile and joke with you, but sometimes, he would be quiet and distant. Whenever he did this, you knew he was thinking about his past, or Steve, so you usually left him alone when he was in one of his funks. You would only check on him every so often to see how he was, not bothering him or demanding to know why he was a little distant.
He battled through his thoughts, and you were by his side every step of the way. He was grateful he found you and you gave him a chance. He just wasn't the greatest at expressing his feelings. You knew he struggled with them, but you didn't push him or expect him to blurt out what he was feeling, he just wasn't the type to do so.
"Miss me doll?" he teased while he walked into your apartment.
"Of course, you silly goose" you rolled your eyes at him.
He smiled wide at you.
You always missed him when he would go on his missions.
Sometimes he could tell you about them, but more often that not, he couldn't talk about them due to the secrecy of them. Those were the missions you hated, the secret ones, but you managed.
You checked him over for any signs of injury, patting him down and lifting his shirt, making him giggle a little. The fact that Bucky Barnes would giggle uncontrollably when you touched him in certain places made you chuckle to yourself.
"I'm not injured sweets" he told you.
"But I don't mind you feeling me up" he winked at you making you blush.
"I know, I just like seeing for myself" you squeezed his sides and he chuckled.
"Come on, I have supper ready" you walked to your kitchen with Bucky following.
You sat and ate and told him about all the things you did while he was gone. You were a schoolteacher and taught high school and were always telling Bucky stories about the kids nowadays.
Bucky told you a few stories about him and Steve in school and you chuckled at their antics. You were thankful the kids you taught were a little older than some of your friends who taught the younger kids, mainly the kindergartener's. You shuddered at their horror stories and were glad you didn't teach them.
Bucky was always in awe of the kids nowadays and what they could and couldn't get away with.
"So, I sent him to the principal's office because he wouldn't put his phone down after I asked him three times. His mother called me asking why her son was in the principal's office, and I told her why. She didn't believe me that her son wouldn't listen, so the principal had to get involved. I swear some parents nowadays are ridiculous" you shook your head.
Bucky finished eating and just sat and watched you talk. These were some of his favourite times with you, listening to your stories and chatting about your days.
It made him feel almost normal, well, he had other favourite times with you, but those were a little more adult related as he cleared his throat thinking about them.
"Anyways, I'm glad you're back and you aren't injured. When is your next mission?" you asked, packing up the dishes on the table.
"Not sure yet. We did everything we needed to do on this one, so I don't think for a while" Bucky thought about it.
"So, you're staying for a bit then?"
"Yup, you have me all to yourself for at least a week, maybe longer" Bucky walked over and wrapped his arms around you.
"Good, I'm glad" you smiled.
You finished the dishes and smiled at Bucky. He walked over to you and kissed you hard, which you returned. He walked you to your bedroom, and, well, he showed you just how much he missed you, three times to be exact.
You snuggled into Bucky's chest after your last round and breathed out a sigh of content. Bucky traced his hand up and down your arm, sending shivers and goosebumps all over.
These were the times you loved with Bucky. Just the two of you, in the quiet darkness of a room, snuggled in close to each other.
You had almost blurted out you loved him, but you didn't want to freak him out.
Many times, he almost told you, but he would say "I care about you" or "I like you a lot".
You knew he was trying to say he loved you, but you wanted him to say it to you first, to help him express himself a little better.
You spent the following day hanging out with Bucky. You went out for breakfast at your favourite diner and wandered the streets. You picked up a birthday present for your sister which was the following weekend and Bucky was going to meet your whole family for the first time.
You were nervous not only for him to meet everyone, but for your family to accept him. You weren't sure how they were going to take the former assassin being a part of your life, so you were nervous about it. Your mom assured you the rest of the family would behave themselves, but you still had your doubts.
You ended up sitting on a park bench, relaxing in the sun while Bucky had his arm wrapped around you. You smiled at the ducks as they swam past you, pointing out how cute they were.
"Not as cute as you" Bucky nudged your shoulder.
You rolled your eyes at his cheesiness but secretly loved it.
"Look, a chipmunk!" you pointed out a small chipmunk at the base of the tree.
"I love chipmunks" you giggled as you watched it gather seeds from the ground.
"You do?"
"Yup"
"What else do you love?" asked Bucky.
Your stomach dropped and your throat got dry.
Do I tell him? No, best not to freak him out.
"Oh, you know, things" you teased.
Bucky rolled his eyes at you and smiled.
Did he want me to say it first?
You were a little confused, but you knew Bucky would never blurt something like that out.
Would he? No, he was too private.
"Let's head back" you smiled, and Bucky nodded.
He carried the bag that held your sister's gift and guided you back to your apartment.
You were feeling tired from your previous night's "activities", so you snuggled down in your bed, with Bucky at your side.
"Night Bucky" you smiled.
You leaned over and kissed him, which he happily returned.
"Night sweets" he smiled.
You rolled onto your side and Bucky snuggled you to his front.
You felt so safe in his arms and loved how he wrapped himself around you. Even though it made you sweat your face off, you never complained.
You laid there in Bucky's arms content and happy while Bucky softly breathed on your neck. You had a tank top on while he traced light lines and taps up and down your arm. He leaned away a little and started tracing soft circles on your upper back, something he does if he is thinking about things.
You always let him do that because it helps him, but it also feels amazing when someone traces on your back. It sends tingles all over and completely relaxes you. You read somewhere it was called ASMR and were now obsessed with some YouTubers who dedicated their channels to the craft.
Your breathing evened out while Bucky was happily tracing things on your upper back when you perked up a little but kept quiet. You could feel the random circles and lines he was tracing, but they were turning into what felt like letters.
You could feel the outline of a line going up and down, then a line and an abrupt change to the right, then another circle, then a vee, then another circle and quick line.
Was that? Was that I L-O-V-E?
You felt him trace I L-O-V-E a few times, then he made the trace of the letter U on your back.
You tensed.
Did he? Did he just trace I L-O-V-E U on my back?
Your heart started to beat a little faster. He was doing it a few more times, then he gently stopped, pulled you back, and held you close to his chest. You felt his breath even out as he fell asleep.
Your head was a mess.
You were excited, but did you tell him you felt it? Would he freak out if he knew you were awake? Were you certain it was I L-O-V-E U? Maybe it was I L-I-K-E U? Or something else entirely?
You had so many questions and damn your overactive brain. You stayed up for another hour thinking of things when sleep finally overcame you.
The following day, you woke to an empty bed, but you heard Bucky in your kitchen.
"Morning" you mumbled, stumbling to the island to have your much needed coffee. Bucky was a morning person, and you were not.
Why did morning people and not morning people always end up together? You thought about it while you sipped your drink.
"What are we going to do today?" asked Bucky.
"Not sure. Do you want me to help you organize your kitchen?"
Bucky thought about it. He spent more time at your place than his. He said he prefers your apartment to his because it feels homey to him. His apartment is a little bare and basic, but you assured him you felt just as comfortable there as you did at your place.
"Sure. Let's go after breakfast" he smiled and you agreed.
"Just gotta wake up a bit more first" you grumbled into your mug making Bucky chuckle.
You finished helping Bucky with his kitchen, cleaning a few things, and organizing some of his cupboards and drawers when you decided to order a pizza and relax. Since it was the weekend, you were gearing up for another week at work.
You had no tests or assignments to mark so you decided to spend the night at Bucky's. Plus, his apartment was closer to your school, so you shaved about 15 minutes off your commute if you stayed at his place.
You snuggled into Bucky's bed (something you helped him buy when you first met him) and chatted about your upcoming week.
Bucky said he had some meetings with Sam and Torres but nothing too major, so you were glad he was going to be around to pick you up from school.
"Goodnight sweets" Bucky whispered.
"Night Bucky" you rolled over and squeezed him tight.
He was the little spoon sometimes and was totally ok with is while you snuggled into his back. You could feel him relax a little when you got an idea.
You leaned back a little and decided to trace his back. He wore a black tank top to bed so he could feel your traces on his arm and upper back. Touch was a little foreign to Bucky that he was slowly getting used to.
After some time, you discovered he enjoyed light touches and would take every opportunity to gently touch him when you first started seeing him. Whether it was a gentle hand hold, or pat to his arm, he used to flinch from them, but over time, he has come to relax and enjoy touches from you. He rarely flinches from you and can even get a little needy if you don't reciprocate right away.
You traced his arm, making light circles on it, moving to his back and neck, trailing your fingers over his top and skin. You were gentle and mixed in some light nail scratches too, causing goosebumps on Bucky's skin.
His breathing was even, and you heard him let out a sigh when you got an idea.
You started tracing his back, like he was the night before, making a long line from his neck to the middle of his shoulders, then another. You traced a heart, then the letter U on his upper back.
He didn't move, but you felt him tense a little.
You continued tracing on his upper back, the letters I L-O-V-E U like he did to you, and you felt him stir a little, then you saw his cheek tighten because he was smiling to himself.
He felt the letters you traced on his back and was happy you felt the same way. Even though you didn't tell him with your words, the feeling he felt warmed his heart.
He just had to work on getting the words out to you to go along with his actions.
Something he promised himself he would work on, but for now, he would settle on tracing the words on you and you doing the same to him.