Next morning
The light from the window is shining into Jax's eyes and it woke him up. He fluttered his eyes as he adjusted to the light while he sat up. The pounding in Jax's head didn't agree with his movement. Jax laid back down on the bed. He put his palms against his eyes and rubbed the sleep from them. He looked at the blanket that is on top of him. He tried to sit up again and leaned back against the headboard of the bed. Jax noticed he's wearing his clothes from yesterday.
How did he get back to the B&B? Jax looked around the room for a hint. Did he come here with someone last night? Did he have a one night stand and go back to his old ways like how he used to hook up with the croweaters at the clubhouse? He didn't see any evidence that someone stayed with him throughout the night. Except the blanket and him wearing the same clothes, he can't recall much from last night. One small detail seems to be coming into focus. He can't determine if it was reality or a dream, but Kate was at the bar and she wrapped her arms around him. No way had he hooked up with Harmony's sweetheart. Not her. He has a foggy memory of someone touching his cheek and rubbing his arm. Maybe it was a strange dream he had.
#
Jax softly walked to the main room of the house. He hoped no one is at the front desk. He decided to go outside and get some fresh air and smoke a cigarette. He almost reached the door when a voice stopped him from moving.
"Well, look who decided to grace us with his presence." Allison stepped into the room. Her tone wasn't friendly. This was a first for Jax. He turned around.
Jax felt awkward and didn't know what to say. "Uh, Allison..."
"You scared me last night." Allison said. "How could you get so drunk that poor Kate had to practically drag you from the bar to here?"
Jax's face scrunched up in confusion. "Kate was here?" He quietly asked.
"Yes, she was and thank god for that. If she wasn't with you last night at Vinnie's, who knows where you would be right now." Allison slightly raised her voice.
"I had a terrible day, Allison. I needed to blow off steam." Jax said.
"Blow off steam?" Allison scoffed at Jax. "How much steam did you need to blow off for $85?"
"$85?!" Jax exclaimed.
"Don't worry. Kate paid your bill, so Donnie won't be chasing you around town to get the money." Allison reassured him.
"Could you not shout? My head is throbbing." Jax asked.
"Oh, I'm too loud?" Allison sarcastically asked. "How rude of me." She slammed her hand on the desk.
"Allison..." Jax protested.
"You listen to what I'm about to tell you and listen well because I'm only going to say this once." Allison said. "You are going to go to the hair salon and find Kate. You're going to thank her for what she did last night. Ask Kate to take her lunch break and buy her whatever she wants at the diner. That woman is a saint for dealing with you last night. She didn't leave your side until you fell asleep."
Jax felt relieved that the worst case scenario didn't happen last night. "So she just stayed with me in the room?" Jax asked. "Nothing else happened?"
Allison let out a scoff. "Get your mind out of the gutter. What is it with men, alcohol, and one night stands? Movies are romanticizing one night stands way too much. She stayed until you fell asleep."
"Why did she do this?" Jax asked Allison.
"What kind of a question is that?" Allison is surprised by Jax's question. "In this town we always help each other out, no matter what the circumstance may be."
Allison's answer made Jax now see just how different the people were in Charming. The town is small like Harmony, but the residents weren't interested in helping anyone. They practically fed on the thrill of knowing someone is struggling. They weren't interested in making anyone's life better.
Allison noticed how quiet Jax is. "You okay, Jax?" Her caring and friendly tone returned.
"Yeah." Jax snapped out of his thoughts. "I'm just not used to people being this helpful. People didn't care that much from the town I grew up in. If you made a mistake, they didn't help you fix it. In fact, they made sure to remind you about the mistake you did as often as possible."
"Who's going to help us if we don't help each other?" Allison added. She noticed that the confrontation may have worked on Jax because his original plan of sneaking out of the B&B was long forgotten. "Now, don't think you're getting out of what I suggested for you to do. Go find Kate and give her a proper thank you."
#
(AN: Listen to this song until the end of the chapter.)
Kate is talking with the client she just did the highlights for. The client paid and walked out of the salon. Cynthia noticed a man pacing in front of the salon. "Hey Kate, there's a guy pacing on the sidewalk. What's his deal?" Cynthia asked.
Kate turned her head to the side and she saw Jax pacing back and forth. "I don't know, Cynthia."
"Go out there and see what's going on." Cynthia said.
"Why me?" Kate asked.
"Well, it has been mentioned that you and our newest resident were attached at the hip at Vinnie's and left together." Cynthia said.
"It's not like that and nothing happened." Kate said. "People need to mind their own business. They don't know the entire situation."
Kate decided to get this over with and opened the door of the salon. She hesitantly approached Jax and he turned around at that moment and saw Kate standing in front of him. She decided to break the ice. "Hey, Jackson." For some reason she thought it would be better to say his real name rather than the one everyone calls him. Kate took note that Allison calls him Jax.
"Uh, hey." Jax awkwardly mentioned. He didn't know how to start this conversation. He couldn't help but take notice of Kate's outfit. She's wearing tight jeans and a white top that had a v-neck. She looked beautiful. He instantly shook the thought from his head. Why did this random thought enter his mind?
(AN: Kate's outfit)
"Look, Kate-" Jax began.
"Jackson, why are you pacing in front of the salon?" Kate decided to get right to the point.
"Well, it's complicated." Jax quietly said.
"You feeling, okay? You could barely walk last night. I thought at some point I had to carry you into the B&B." Kate asked Jax.
"Uh, I..." Jax scratched the back of his head, looking down at the ground. He couldn't look at her. This was not the conversation he wanted to have with regarding the awkward situation. Kate had almost a poker face and Jax is unable to get a read on her. He shook his head, praying that he didn't embarrass himself last night – or worse – shown a side of him that the town didn't need to see or know about. "I'm sorry that you had to put up with me last night. I didn't do anything stupid?" He tried to recall what he did but his mind is still blank.
Kate thought for a moment and considered if she should tell Jax about his tearful mumbling. She decided not do it. Instead she pressed a smile on her face and tried to ease the awkwardness. "Getting drunk in a bar wasn't very smart. It was obvious that you can't handle your liquor. I guess you don't have much of a tolerance for it. Are you a lightweight?"
Jax is surprised at the shift of the topic. "I'm not a lightweight, but I guess I pushed my luck last night." He tried to give an explanation.
"Next time reduce your liquor quantity because I will not be covering such a huge bill again." Kate said.
"I won't." Jax promised.
"So, you didn't answer my question, Jackson." Kate said. "Why are you standing in front of the salon?"
"I wanted to apologize for last night. I can't recall much of what happened last night, but you shouldn't have had to put up with me." Jax said.
"No need to apologize. I couldn't let you leave the bar in the state you were in. It was the right thing to do. It was a good thing I knew you were staying because as soon as I helped you get in my car you passed out." Kate said.
"Did Allison see me last night?" Jax asked.
Kate nodded her head. "She did." Kate confirmed. "She was surprised. I'm guessing this isn't a frequent thing you do when you're coming back to the B&B."
"Not really." Jax said. "To answer your question, I'm here because I wanted to thank you for what you did."
"That's not necessary. I did what any person would have done." Kate said.
"It is. Would it be possible if you took your lunch break right now?" Jax asked. He was trying to fulfill Allison's suggestion.
"Why?" Kate wondered.
"I would like to extend my thank you in the form of a lunch at the diner down the street. You can order whatever you want and I'll cover the entire bill." Jax suggested.
"I have to check in with my boss. I do have a couple of appointments for this afternoon." Kate said.
"You do that. I'll be here." Jax pointed at the bench and sat down on it.
Kate stepped back in the salon. "So, what's going on?" Cynthia asked.
"Would it be possible for me to take my lunch break earlier today?" Kate asked. "I know I have two appointments that are back to back, but I have a situation that I have to deal with now."
"Is Ava okay?" Cynthia asked.
"This isn't about Ava." Kate said. "I'm just taking my break earlier."
"May I ask why?" Cynthia asked.
"It's complicated." Kate said. "I just need it right now."
"Your next appointment is in 15 minutes, you're cutting it close." Cynthia said.
"Let Sarah cover my appointment. Her next one isn't until two hours later." Kate said.
"Fine." Cynthia gave in. "I'll let Sarah know."
"Thanks. I owe her one." Kate said. She went to the break room and grabbed her purse before walking out of the salon.
Jax is smoking a cigarette and looked up when he heard footsteps. "Everything good?" He asked.
"Yes. I got the approval." Kate said.
He finished his cigarette and threw it in the trash can. They walked in silence to the diner. When they reached the door, Jax opened it for her. Kate didn't think he would be so chivalrous. They walked until they reached an empty booth that is in the corner. They sat down across from each other and it wasn't long before the waitress brought two menus.
"What would you like?" The waitress asked Kate.
"A cheeseburger and loaded fries." Kate answered. "Also, one ginger ale."
The waitress wrote down the order and Jax mentioned that he wanted the same and a Coke. She took the menus and left.
Kate leaned back against the booth and folded her arms. "So, what's going on Jackson? Why did you bring me here?"
Jax also leaned back. "You can call me Jax." He said. "Everyone does."
"All right, Jax." Kate said.
"Why did you stick around last night, Kate?" Jax asked her. "In my room, after you brought me back to the B&B." He added. Kate tried to avoid the topic. "Allison told me this morning."
Kate struggled with her explanation. She doesn't know if it would be right to ask why he was so sad. "It was the right thing to do." She said.
"Somehow I don't believe your explanation." Jax said.
"Honestly?" Kate asked.
"Yeah, honestly." Jax nodded his head.
"You were very drunk at Vinnie's. If I didn't tell Donnie to cut you off, who knows how much more you were going to drink. You didn't look well and were slurring. When you tried to get up from the stool, you couldn't keep your balance so I had to hold you against me to help you walk. Before we made it out of the bar, you said that you were going to be heading out and I assumed you would most likely be driving. I prevented you from doing that." Kate recalled.
"I was thinking of driving?" Jax wondered.
"Most likely yes. I couldn't allow you to be on the road. You were either going to hurt yourself or hurt someone else." Kate didn't want to mention this, but she knew she had to do it. She leaned forward and quietly said. "A drunk driver is the reason why my husband is dead and why my daughter doesn't have a father." Kate mentioned.
"I'm sorry for your loss." Jax quietly said. "Was it recent?"
"It's been two and a half years." Kate said.
The waitress brought the food and drinks. She asked if they wanted anything else and they said no. She left to assist the other customers.
Kate decided to change the topic. "So, where are you from?" She thought it was a good neutral question to ask.
"California." Jax answered.
"Wow, you're a long way away from home. You must probably miss the West Coast and all the sunshine." Kate mentioned. "The Midwest is probably like a culture shock to you."
"There's nothing left over there for me. I don't miss California. I'm starting to get used to the Midwest." Jax answered.
"What about your family?" Kate asked. "You would probably get homesick at some point and want to visit your family."
"I don't have any family in California." Jax replied. "I don't have a reason to go back."
Kate noticed the change in his tone didn't slip by her as Jax answered her questions. It was cold. Empty. Kate sensed it was time to end this topic and she chose to talk about herself. "I've never been out of Harmony. Everything and everyone I've ever needed has been right here. My parents are from here. I met my husband here. I did recently take a road trip with my daughter to Milwaukee, Wisconsin. We saw the main attractions there. That was the first time I have ever been out of Minnesota. Now that it's just the two of us, I thought it was time for her to see other places. I stepped out of my comfort zone for her, but it was worth it."
"How old is your daughter?" Jax asked as he took a bite from the cheeseburger.
"She's three. Her name's Ava. She's this little ball full of energy. She's curious about the world around her. She will start a conversation with just about anyone she encounters. I don't even know how I keep up with her sometimes." Kate admitted.
"Sounds like she's a good kid." Jax mentioned. He thought how Ava could almost be like a female version of Abel with the characteristics Kate just listed.
"Yes, she is." Kate said.
"She has a nice name." Jax mentioned.
"My husband picked the name. He named her after the actress Ava Gardner. I know it's a bit corny, but he was a fan of actresses from the Golden Age of Hollywood. Eventually the name grew on me." Kate explained. She noticed how Jax's gaze is completely focused on her. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to go on a rant. I'm not usually one of those people who love to hear the sound of their voice." Kate decided that she needed to shift the conversation again. She did have the burning question in the back of her mind about why Jax was crying when she helped him get to his room. "So, do you like Harmony?" She asked.
"It's a lot different from Charming. That's the town I grew up in. It's a small town like this one." Jax replied.
"How so?" Kate got curious. "Considering the fact that they're both small towns."
"People in Charming weren't friendly to strangers." Jax said. "This probably wouldn't happen in Charming." He pointed between them. "Two strangers having lunch wouldn't happen in my town."
"That's too bad. Everyone should be given a chance." Kate said.
"Life isn't always fair." Jax said.
"All of us should strive to make life better. I want to mention something and I sincerely mean it." Kate mentioned.
"What is it?" Jax asked her.
"We're all happy you came to Harmony. It's good to see a new face becoming a part of this community. You're a good person, Jax. I may not know much about your past, but I completely trust Allison's approval regarding you. She's usually a good judge of character. Adam thinks you're a great mechanic. If you ever need anything, we're all here for you. We will always help you no matter what you're going through." Kate said. "I helped you last night because you needed help. You can count on Allison, Adam, and even me."
Jax found himself looking at Kate. Her words were so heartfelt and sincere that he didn't know how to react. He was speechless. He'd always thought he'd have a place in Charming. In many ways he did, but the memories that haunt him would keep him from ever returning there. He would be opening a can of worms that shouldn't get opened. Harmony was slowly but surely becoming home to him. He saw a house that he's considering to purchase if his offer is accepted. He has a job and he even met people that seemed to care about him. He'd never had anyone care for him like Allison. No one welcomed him with open arms like Kate and Allison. Even after their talk, he still can't wrap his mind about the fact that Kate helped him and even stayed by his side for who knows how long. Jax couldn't help but think that in an alternate reality, Kate wouldn't last long in SAMCRO's lifestyle. Her caring side and her compassion would have made her a target and Gemma would have threatened and scared her away almost like every woman that came into his life. Except for Tara. Tara stuck around and tried to warn him even – and what did Gemma do? She killed Tara because she was the one person who wasn't afraid to stand up to her.
#
One hour later
Jax and Kate walked back to the salon and they stood near the front window. The other hairstylists couldn't help but glance at them.
"Thanks for accepting my offer." Jax quietly said.
"You're welcome. I'm glad I accepted it. It was good getting to know more about you, even though you're very hush hush about your life in California." Kate mentioned.
"There's not much to say about my personal life." Jax said.
"I doubt that, Jax." Kate corrected his comment.
"Don't. There's nothing about me you'd want to know." Jax's tone changed again. Kate could tell there is still something that is bothering him. She believes the sorrow he let out last night isn't entirely gone. The sadness is back.
Kate knew that now is the moment to mention what she wanted to say earlier at the diner. He wouldn't face her. She stepped closer and her hand gently grabbed his. Jax almost backed away from the sudden contact from her hand. He looked at her. "You shouldn't think like that. Jax, whatever pain you're going through, don't let it consume you. You have so much to live for. All of us go through pain at some point in our lives, but with time, we overcome the pain. We all have something to live for." Kate said. "I wasn't the person you're seeing now when my husband died. I didn't leave my house for a long time. I didn't even want to talk to people. I just wanted to stay in the bubble my house provided for my daughter and me. I've got Ava and she gives me the motivation to see the beauty and joy that life still offers. You'll reach that moment too."
"I don't have anything to live for, Kate. My only goal is to just be on autopilot." Jax quietly said.
"You shouldn't think that way." Kate said and she gently grabbed his hand.
Jax couldn't figure out why Kate grabbed his hand. His thumb brushed the skin between her thumb and index finger. He doesn't know why he rubbed her hand. He can't comprehend his action. If only Kate knew about his past or if any of the residents found about his former life, Jax doubted they'd be as welcoming as they had been. It didn't matter. He would never talk about his past. The person he was died in Charming along with every person associated with SAMCRO. The person he is now is nobody. In Harmony, he has no history, no family, and no past. He's starting from zero. Clean slate. He is just Jax Teller, the new mechanic in Harmony.
"You're a good woman, Kate." Jax softly said to her. His hand covered hers. She watched his hand. His hand is rough. Like Scott mentioned, Jax is definitely a blue collar worker. It was warm to the touch. Kate's knuckles felt like they were on fire while Jax's thumb rubbed them. The caress made her feel different emotions all at once. Jax pulled his hand away from hers. The contact lasted too long, but when it was over Kate suddenly felt a longing for it again. Jax liked how soft Kate's hand is, but this thought he's feeling right now is so wrong. He's not starting another relationship. He's not going to open this can of worms. He had that with Tara and he couldn't protect her from the enemy who by a strange twist of fate happened to be his own mother. Gemma had manipulated him so well that he could never see or imagine she would always have an ulterior motive for any person that came into his life. Juice said it best about what kind of a person Gemma truly was: Gemma knows every truth behind every lie inside every secret. She's the gatekeeper.
It bothered Kate how Jax spoke about himself during their conversation at the diner. It also bothered her how Jax wouldn't speak about himself. She couldn't read him He was closed off. He was dark and mysterious. Kate also noticed that Jax somehow seemed to hate himself. Adam and Allison seemed to like him a lot. To Kate, Jax is essentially a stranger and he seemed to be keeping himself this way on purpose when she's near him.
"I think you're a lot better than you give yourself credit for, Jax." Kate said. "You're a good man. Don't be so hard on yourself." Kate opened the door of the salon. "Thanks for convincing me to take my lunch break earlier." She added before stepping back in the salon.
Jax stood on the curb and watched as Kate greeted the customer who just sat down on the chair.
Kate smiled at whatever the customer was telling her. Jax began his walk to the spot where his Dodge Ram is parked.