seon
today is the day. i roll onto my back in my bed and stare at the ceiling for a few minutes. i have to meet everyone at taehyung's in a couple of hours to say goodbye. what i thought was going to be a few months, maybe a few years max, turns out to be forever for one of them. i stare and stare and stare until i finally blink. knocking myself out of the trace i put myself in, i sit up and look around my room.
the sound of my neighbors doors shutting from leaving for work. buses and cars pass my apartment building. i get up and turn my lamp on, moving to the window, i open my curtains. the sun was starting to rise with beautiful pink and orange hues fill the sky. i hug my arms and smile a little. i walk out of my room and go to the kitchen to make me a cup of coffee. i put the k-cup into the machine and walk away to turn my laptop on.
i have been manager in training for about two weeks. this week will be my first week being in charge. i took over all the newest projects that jungkook started, any other thing he was working on was finalized or he said he would finish them up and receive his final paycheck.
i check my emails, sending some, reading some, ignoring most. i get up to finish making my coffee before i go back to my laptop. i decided to start making next weeks work schedule and next weeks photo shoot schedule as well. once, i'm done with my coffee i glance at the clock and decided to go take a shower. i decided to go to work after we get done saying bye. i think it will keep my busy enough to keep it together until i get home.
i get out of the shower and while drying my hair, doing my skin care, and brushing my teeth, i decided on what to wear. i throw my hair into a half up half down do and throw on some light makeup. shortly after, i begin to get dressed.
the whole time i am getting dressed, i find myself spacing out, just staring. i look down at my hands and sigh. i get up from my bed and go into the kitchen, grabbing my lunch box from the fridge. i put my laptop and charger in my back pack and zip it up. i go to the door and put on some regular black shoes, put on a jacket and wrapping my scarf around my neck. i grab my keys and backpack and walk out of the door.
i started riding the bus. namjoon and i talked about how i need to get used to being on my own and agreed maybe i should take the bus instead of having everyone uber me everywhere. i also started walking a lot and studying for my drivers test. this old lady and i have the same bus stop and she always asks me how my kids are doing.
i thinks she thinks i'm someone else but i don't have the heart to tell her. though she wasn't here yesterday. we never really talk so i didn't want to ask but curiosity was killing me. i walk up to the bus stop and she is sitting in her same spot, smiling at me. "good morning." i say with a smile. "good morning, honey. how are your kids?" i smile and nod my head.
"they are doing great. the little one took his first steps the other day." she smiles widely. i always tell her when one of my "kids" hits a big milestone or does something good in "school". it always seems to brighten her day. "i didn't see you yesterday, everything okay?" i ask and she nods. "my daughter is having a hard time right now so i'm letting her move back in with me and she needed my help." she explains and i nod my head.
"you okay, dear? you look a little down." i merely nod my head with a little smile. "i will be okay." i say simply, not wanting to bore her. she gives me a comfortable smile and rubs my shoulder. "don't worry darling. he will come back. they always do."
i look over at her as she starts to laugh a little bit, staring at the road.
~
i get to taehyung's and knock on the door softly. tae opens it with a smile. "hi honey." i say. he sniffs a little and waves his hand for me to come in. the house is empty and doesn't feel like a home anymore. it feels isolated and grey. everything opposite of happy.
"wow." i whisper, looking around. "i never thought i'd see this place empty again." i laugh a little, pointing at the wall. "that spaghetti sauce stain is still there." taehyung laughs and shakes his head. "that is definitely coming out of my deposit." i smile at him. "you have a beautiful soul, kim taehyung." i say to him. he comes over to hug me and i hug him back. "don't change for anyone yang seon." he kisses the top of my head.
"i wouldn't dream of it." i smile and he pulls back smiling. we hear the door open and shut and we look back. we see yoongi walk around the corner with his hands in his pockets. "jesus, who died?" he comments on the ambiance of the room. tae and i chuckle at his joke. "you both doing okay?" he asked, coming to hug us. we both nod a little and sniff. "i've cried all i can cry. i mean look at me, i'm manager for a photography company now. i'm going to work after this."
yoongi and tae laugh a little. notice how yoongi is always the late one and on the day of his best friend's best friend is leaving town, he is the first one to show up. without his roommate, aka my boyfriend. "where is joonie?" tae asked, noticing the same thing. "i couldn't wait any longer to know if you both were okay." he says and taehyung and i smile at him.
the next to show up is seokjin, joo, and hwan. they come into the house, giving hugs and kind words to taehyung. after them, jimin shows up, the most upset about taehyung leaving, understandable. the next is hoseok with namjoon. hoseok doesn't seem to have the energy to keep the mood alive right now. namjoon stays close to me but i'm at taehyung's hip so he can't get very close.
the door opens and shuts and we all look up. taehyung gets up to kiss jungkook who just walked into the empty living room. he makes eye contact with everyone saying good morning or hello. he makes eye contact with me and everything is quiet. "did you guys hear that upstairs?" taehyung asked. everyone gets the hint and starts to make an excuse to go upstairs.
i smile as i watch them scurry upstairs still rambling reasons to leave jungkook and i some time to talk privately. he watches them as well, smile growing across his face.
"they can be over so dramatic." i say and jungkook nods. he sits next to me on the ground. he nudges my shoulder with his. "you know i'm going to be back, right?" i nod my head, "yeah eventually." i shrug. "it's just going to be hard without you guys around for a while. you both have done a lot to help me recently and then, over night, everything is changing and it's strange." jungkook nods and turns to face me. "I will be back before you know it. and besides, there are still holidays and you have your phone. nothing a good call can't fix if you miss me too much."
i smile at him and he looks at me. "i'm going to miss you, you know?" he says and i nod. "i'm going to miss you too." he reaches his arms out for hug and i move over to hug him. i hear feet coming back down stairs.
"oh silly hwan always dropping his binky. help me look for it?" i hear joo's voice and everyone's feet start to scramble back upstairs. i look up to see her pushing everyone upstairs. i laugh against jungkook's shoulders. i feel his shoulders bounce from him laughing too. he pulls with a smile on his face. i smile back. he tucks a piece of hair behind my ear. "i love you sun. i always have and i always will." i smile a bit harder, blushing slightly. "I don't have the courage to say that to your face quite yet." he laughs a little and nods. "It took me a lot to say it."
we sit there and stare at each other for a while. "i hate to be the barrier of bad news but," feet come down the stairs and everyone appears. "we have a long drive ahead of us." taehyung finishes his sentence. i nod my head and stand up, dusting my pants off. everyone begins to say goodbye to each other. i thought i was done crying but tae came over to hug me and i started to bawl my eyes out. there is no way i'm crying in front of everybody right now.
"honey, it's okay. i will come back and visit." taehyung rubs my back as he is hugging me. "I know, it's... just... hard." I say in between cries. tae laugh a little bit and pulls back to look at me. "oh baby, you never ugly cry." i laugh at his comment and go back to hugging him. "i'm going to miss you like crazy." i say. "i'm going to miss you. more than you know." he back away from me and goes to hug someone else. jungkook walks up to me and pulls me into a hug. "you are too pretty to cry." he whispers in my ear and i smile a little bit. "do you expect me not to cry?" i say back and he shrugs a little. "not this hard." i laugh and throw my head back a bit.
"keep that smile on your face until i get back okay?" he says and i nod. "I will be smiling more once you decide to come back." i say. everyone starts to help taehyung put his bags in his car. we pull back and follow them out.
"that's the last of it." namjoon shuts the trunk and claps his hands. "take care of the baby, will you?" namjoon says to tae, pointing to jungkook. "i plan on it." namjoon hugs jungkook longer than i thought he was going to. "look after her while i'm gone?" jungkook says to namjoon and he nods with a smile. "count on it." i smile at jungkook. he comes over to hug me one more time. "i love you sun, take care of yourself please." he whispers and i nod, beginning to cry again. he pulls back and walks to his car.
"take care of the golden closet." he says before getting in his car. "promise." i say under my breath. taehyung comes up and gives me a kiss on the forehead. "don't forget about our promise." he whispers, putting his forehead to mine. "don't forget about me." i say and he sadly smiles. a tear drops down his cheek, "how could i ever forget about you. you are my soulmate." I smile and give him one last hug. "call me when you get there." i say and he nods.
i look over to check on jimin and he is crying into yoongi's shoulder. yoongi hold him with one arm and the other in his pants pocket. namjoon comes over to me and puts his arm around me, hugging me softly. "you okay, my love?" he asked and i nod. "i will be." i nod my head. "i have to get to work soon." i say and he nods. "i can drop you off." i smile up at him. we start to wave at taehyung and jungkook as they start to leave. before jungkook leaves the driveway, he blows me a kiss and drives away.
~
after work, i catch the bus to go home. everyone at work made sure to check on me a lot, considering they knew how close jungkook and i were. today was somewhat of a busy day so my mind stayed pretty busy. joo asked me if i would like some girl time so i am going to go over to her house while jin is out with hoseok. it's nice to have a girl to talk to instead of men. i respect all of their advice and stuff but a girl is so much easier to talk to.
the bus stops at another bus stop and the lady from this morning gets on the bus. she takes a seat next to me and smiles at me. "he left this morning." i say softly and she nods. "how do you feel?" she asked and i nod my head. "i think he will come back, eventually." i say with a smile. she looks over and starts to laugh a little. "my husband died in the army. i remember i was so heart broken when i realized he was gone."
She begins to tell me, "my daughter was so young she barely remembers him. i would try to keep myself busy but it never worked." "how did you get better?" i asked her, curiously. she sits there for a second. "i cried it out." i nod my head a little. "i've cried all i can cry right now." i sigh.
"when two people are meant for each other, no time is too long, no distance is too far; no one can ever tear them apart." she speaks like a prophet. she puts her hand on my shoulder. a sudden wave of sadness hits me and my ears start to burn. my eyes begin to water before i notice the tears rolling down my face. i wipe my eyes. "i know you are going to miss him. but if it was meant to be, he is going to come back." i nod my head.
"i hope so."