Dalia hated him. She hated everyone, and most of all, she hated Balqaas. It was this burning hatred that refrained her mind from rest. She lay tossing and turning under the cold silk sheets, huffing and puffing as she recalled the King's words.
She hadn't realised that one simple request had caused such a conundrum between her and the King. She wondered if this was nothing but the plan of the Queen, whose jealousy in the disguise of an act of kindness, meant to instil displeasure towards her.
Dalia went still. Of course that was her plan, she thought, reprimanding herself for falling so easily into the trap. She should have known better, bearing witness to the years of dramatics and pettiness of her father's concubines. Back then, she had sworn to never be like them. But now she understood all too well, tossing her naivety aside, and promising herself to never be so gullible. If it was a war the Queen wanted, she was going to get one. First, she would assemble as many allies as possible. It wasn't going to be an easy task, with everyone's apprehension against her people.
Once the sun had peaked its head over the horizon, Dalia was up and ready, a new sense of determination fueled by her hatred. She called for Meera, who came running through the gossamer curtains in an instant.
"Take this invitation to Sahiba Haifa," she commanded, then called for more maids to help her bathe and dress, and others to prepare the tea room.
Dalia did not wait long when the scarred prince's wife joined her right on time.
"Thank you for the invite," Haifa said, as she clutched her subtly protruding belly, taking a steady seat on the cushions in front of the Princess. Her handmaiden stood by her side, gripping her other hand until her lady was comfortably sat. Dalia noted how not once did she look up.
"I appreciate you accepting my invitation on short notice," Dalia said. "I hope I didn't interrupt your plans,"
"No, I was just going to have breakfast with my husband," Haifa replied.
Dalia nodded and then called for the food. They sat in silence as they enjoyed the flavoursome spread, ending with freshly cut fruit and warm beverages. As she sipped on her coffee, Haifa on her mint tea, Dalia snuck glances at her handmaiden. Her gaze remained focused on her feet, eyes averted as she interacted with her lady. Still, she had not glanced Dalia's way.
"So," she began. "I hear your handmaiden is from Rughad,"
The said person tensed up.
Haifa settled her cup down. "Yes, Salma had grown up in the outskirts of Rughad,"
"Ah," Dalia hummed. "Though, I am surprised you have selected one of my people to be your closest confidant,"
Haifa responded with a tight smile. From the corner of her eyes, she could see Salma trying to conceal her distress, so she signalled with her hand to calm down.
"Salma came to Balqaas at a young age, so she has been raised here,"
Dalia leaned forward and brought her hand up to whisper, "Do you not feel anxious to have her by your side? In case she could be....you know....a spy from my father?"
"I know where her loyalty stands," Haifa stated, pressing her lips into a tight line. "Salma is but one of the many who have arrived in Balqaas from a young age, to settle here,"
Dalia smirked and whipped her long braid over her left shoulder. She took a long sip of her drink and glared at Salma, watching her tremble with fear. It brought her such great satisfaction she craved more.
Setting the cup down loudly, she gave the scarred prince's wife a cold expression.
"She is a Rughadian, our laws state that her loyalty is first to her birth country," she declared. "Unlike you, I do not feel comfortable to have one of your people as my handmaid. It just so happens that your handmaid is from Rughad, and is it not in my right to have her as my closest confidant?"
The entire room froze. The other servant girls had their jaws dropping to the marble tiles. Dalia finally felt Salma's eyes on her, but her gaze remained on Haifa, who was the calmest of them all.
"Salma is under my protection, and that also means the protection of every individual of Balqaas,"
Dalia felt the pain of a dagger piercing her gut. Of course, they did not trust her, but was she never going to be trusted by them?
"Am I not considered under your fold now? I can promise her security under my protection-" she babbled, attempting to twist the invisible dagger out.
Haifa remained unyielding, giving her an apologetic smile.
"I am afraid I cannot accept your request," she answered. "Salma was not treated well in Rughad, and I cannot instill that trauma on her again,"
Dalia had intended this as a silly game, to mess with them all but oddly, it only irked her.
"What my father did has nothing to do with me-" she refuted, just when a tall shadow appeared behind the gossamer-curtained entrance.
"My wife has made her decision." retorted the scarred Prince as he pushed back the drapes to reveal himself.
"Abbas!" Haifa exclaimed. "What are you doing here?"
"Excuse me for interrupting, but I have come to collect my wife." he boomed.
Abbas strode right over to his wife, signaling with his eyes to go, and gently lifting her to him.
"We are not done yet-" Dalia huffed, furious by the sudden interruption. She leaped up from the cushions and stalked them out to the courtyard, cursing the weight of her four-layered embroidered skirt.
"We have been summoned for an urgent congress and Malik requires our assistance," Abbas explained loudly to both his wife and the Princess.
Haifa, aware that they were being tailed out of the Harem, turned back to their stalker.
"Thank you for having me, and I do apologize for ending it on this note,"
Nevertheless, Dalia continued to follow them, only stopping when they entered the Palace. Discarding the silly game, she turned her mind to focus on what was happening. The King had called an urgent meeting. Why had she not been informed?
"Wait! Have I not been requested present?" she called, her gut twisting uncomfortably when she noticed the many guests entering.
"No," Abbas replied, but when Haifa tapped him on his arm, he stopped and sighed.
"She will want to come..." his wife whispered.
Followed seconds later by the Princess, "But I wish to join too!"
They both turned to her.
Finally getting their attention, Dalia picked up her skirt and strode over to them. Around them, others had started to take notice, all muttering their greetings to the scarred Prince and his wife. They were all dressed in fine adornments, some even donning layers of jewelry and silk.
"We cannot bring you if Malik has not requested it," Abbas said, trying to hold back his temperament. He was aware that his relatives, who had just arrived, were all taking note of their conversation so he kept his voice low.
"We shall ask him then!" Dalia concluded, striding ahead of them with the crowd, pausing to look back and signaling for them to hurry.
Abbas sighed, but Haifa tugged him along.
"Come on Habibi, we'll be late," she said, then greeting one of his distant aunts.
"But she cannot possibly go like that," Abbas muttered, aware of the curious looks of his relatives directed at the Princess.
Dalia paused, hands on her hips. "What is wrong with my attire?"
"There is nothing wrong, you look beautiful," Haifa interceded, giving Abbas a stern look.
For a split second, Dalia felt her cheeks burn, brushing her skirt self-consciously until she caught herself and stopped. When had she started letting doubt creep into her mind?
"Fine, but the Malik must approve before you enter," Abbas gruffed. When they got to the hall, he retold the story to Harun whilst Haifa waited with the Princess by the doors.
"What?" Harun uttered, ensuring others did not hear.
"She is waiting outside," Abbas ended, motioning to the doors where they hovered.
"Let her join," A voice appeared behind them. It was Thaina. "She does need to be known to the entire court,"
Harun looked to his wife, unspoken words passing between them.
"She can sit with Haifa," she continued.
Harun nodded. "Fine,"
Dalia noticed the Queen approaching them, only her eyes visible through her silk veil. Of all the women in the room, she was the only one who had donned the veil, making Dalia wonder why.
"Come in," she beckoned, motioning them in. As she led them up the aisle, she could hear the murmur of whispers radiating from both sides.
As much as Dalia hated the fact that the Queen was her ticket in, she followed the two of them in, taking a seat by Haifa at the front row of cushioned seats. The Queen returned to her position on the dais beside the King, and for a moment, Dalia remembered her mother's seat by her father, where she would sit. Back in Rughad, she had a seat on the dais, but here, she never would.
Dalia glanced around and behind her, flashing sweet smiles to those who hid behind their hands, knowing their lips were speaking her name. The throne room had been divided into two, with the ladies on one side and the men on the other. She tried to ignore the stares that came from both.
A shawl dropped onto her lap.
"Wear this over your head," a lady of her senior commanded from behind her, others around her nodding pompously as she returned to her seat a few rows back. Dalia felt a mixture of confusion, followed by embarrassment when she noticed that every woman in the room was veiled, and then outrage. She had begun to roll the shawl up in a tight ball, ready to aim it right back at the brazen elder when Haifa placed a hand on her arm.
"Thank you, Khalati," Haifa interjected with a sweet smile. She took the shawl and unraveled it over her head, grabbing a pin from her head to secure it.
"I thought you said I looked fine," Dalia grumbled to her.
"You do Habibti, it's just these women will find any excuse to attack," she explained and then lowered her voice. "Their own daughters don't even wear the hijab,"
"Such hypocrites," Dalia scoffed, ensuring she was loud enough to be heard.
Thaina, watching the conundrum from her seat, gave Haifa a grateful nod.
"It is not worth reacting. I know from my own experience," Haifa whispered before the hall quietened down. Still, Dalia directed a glare at the lady.
The King of Balqaas stood from his throne.
"I shall begin in the name of Allah, the Most Gracious and Most Merciful. I am grateful that you are all present on such short notice, but I hope you also understand that I would not have called for this if it was not a matter of urgency,"
Dalia's eyes explored his appearance. He grew out his beard a little longer than the scarred Prince, and his features portrayed his softer character. Unlike the scarred Prince's icy cold glare, the brown of his eyes felt warm, inviting, and safe. His speech was clear and confident, true qualities of a King.
She leaned into Haifa. "Why does the Queen wear the face veil and we do not?"
"Generally, all the females in this room do but they have been requested to remove it in this intimate setting. Just to affirm their identities,"
Dalia hummed. "So I have to wear one too?"
Haifa nodded. "Oh, have your lessons not started yet?"
"What lessons?" Dalia asked when a loud voice interrupted them.
"What of your father's condition?" spoke an elderly man from the crowd. "How is his health?"
"Unfortunately, it is not getting better,"
A low hum of voices filled the air. Seeing the look of defeat on the King's face, Dalia almost felt her heart reach out. She knew all too well how it felt.
"The reason why we have called for this meeting is to inform you of my father's decision concerning the traitor,"
Dalia's ears pricked up as he continued.
"My father has decided." Harun took a deep breath in. "The traitor will be imprisoned for life."
The room buzzed louder for the second time. Dalia glanced around at the faces of the women; some had expressions of relief whilst others contorted in displeasure.
"How can he only be imprisoned for committing treason?"
It was the same lady who dropped the scarf on her lap.
"I cannot question my father's decision,"
The lady huffed, and as she sat down, her eyes landed on Dalia's. She narrowed her eyes and whispered to the other ladies around her.
A few men continued pleading with the King.
"Should we not make an example out of him to warn others of ever committing the same?" It was a younger man, who looked to be around the King's age.
"I do not think it is suitable to discuss this with a certain individual present," It was the same lady from before.
"This is a family meeting, with only family present. A concubine's place remains in the Harem," she continued. Her blazing eyes fired at Dalia as the room went silent.
Dalia's heart began to thump faster in her chest but she kept her chin high above the relenting gazes.
"She is just as much as a wife to the Malik as I am,"
Everyone turned to the Queen who had stood from her seat, including Dalia, who wished the Queen hadn't stepped in.
"I do not mean to offend Sahiba, but it does not do us a favor with an individual from Rughad here, for all we know she could be relaying our discussions back to Rughad," the lady tattled.
Dalia's fists clenched into white balls. She felt a warm hand cover them and looked to Haifa who shook her head.
"I assure you that I would not let that happen under my rule," Harun started. "But, you are correct. It is not fair for Sahiba Dalia to have to listen to this,"
Dalia whipped her head to the King, her brows furrowing in disappointment.
"Please escort Sahiba Dalia out, ensuring her safe return to the Harem," he instructed, his eyes not daring to meet hers.
The doors to the throne room opened and Meera came running in with the other maids from the Harem.
Dalia was baffled. She couldn't believe she was being dismissed. Her father may have never requested her specific presence in court, but he had never dismissed her. She wanted to whip up a sandstorm and let everyone in the hall who belittled her feel the wrath of her tongue. But instead, she tamed the fire of her anger for the sake of her pride. Haifa was right. She was not going to let her outburst confirm the image they all had of her. She leaped up from her seat and clambered out, refusing the hand of her maid who waited by the central walkway.
"I shall escort myself out," she spat. Ripping the pinned scarf from her head and dropping it on the marble floor, Dalia strode out of the hall leaving a trail of maids behind her. She could hear the gasps behind her followed by the incessant whispers, but she did not care. They would never accept her as one of their own, so she would not accept being like them.
On the other end, Harun watched with dismay knowing he would have to visit her later.
***
Thaina watched as the hall emptied, waiting for the few elders including her father, who were still conversing with her husband. Haifa had left with Abbas too, heading out the Palace gates to spend the rest of the day with her family, in preparation for Diya's upcoming wedding.
The uncles nodded her way signaling their departure. Her father clasped her hands in his before heading out with her brothers. "We will wait for you outside,"
She nodded. Beside her, Harun sighed.
"Most of our relatives are not pleased with Baba's decision,"
Thaina hummed knowingly, having been retold the story of the lady's side from Haifa.
"What can we do? We are but the informers," Thaina consoled, before remembering her point of discussion. "Dalia,"
Her husband's shoulders slumped at the mere mention, and she placed a hand on his arm.
"She must have felt so humiliated about being asked to leave,"
With no one but themselves remaining, Harun descended from the dais and took a seat on the cushions where his male family members once sat. Thaina followed him undoing the strings of her face veil.
"It seemed the most sensible thing to do," he interjected, looking up at the magnificent throne. How he wished to sit amongst his family members once again. But now he understood how lonely it was to be sitting up there. He felt for his father and every one of his forefathers who had to do the same.
He turned to Thaina. "I couldn't let her just sit through it either. They were right, we do not know if we can trust her just yet. She has only been here for less than a fortnight,"
"I understand that, but all I am suggesting is, it could have been handled better. We are to make her feel at home, not more isolated. I feel for her,"
"You feel too much for her that I worry you forget to feel for yourself," Harun expressed, taking her hand in his.
"Promise me, you will go and apologize...clear up the misunderstanding,"
Harun pursed his lips. "But there was no misunderstanding. Besides, I'm sure she does not want to see me right this moment,"
"Habibi, please,"
Just then, a thump at the door reverberated through the empty hall, pausing their conversation. They stood up from the cushions to find General Musa marching in with a stern look on his face.
Thaina stayed back to tie her veil back on, whilst Harun met him in the middle.
"Apologies for interrupting His Highness," Musa uttered, to which Harun shook his head.
"I know you would only come to me if it was serious, Akhi," Harun chimed, to which Musa would usually smile bashfully in gratitude for the compliment, but his best friend remained stoic.
"A letter has arrived from Rughad, addressed to the Ameera,"
Musa held out the encased parchment, to which Harun took it and examined the exterior. The face had the Princess' name written, and the back had been stamped with an unusual wax seal. Upon looking closer, he could make out the shape of a sand cat's head.
"The staff at the post room alerted me right away, but I thought it would be best you checked it of its contents,"
Harun nodded. General Musa had been appointed as the Chief of Palace security, after the previous incidents of infiltrations, and treacherous members amongst the staff. The Palace was now always on high alert, especially with the imprisonment of his traitor uncle.
"Shukran jazeelan Musa, although I do not think this is anything to worry about,"
Musa nodded, conveyed his goodbyes, and then headed out.
Harun continued to examine the peculiar stamp until he felt Thaina come up behind him.
"That is a cute stamp," she smiled. "But what makes you unsuspicious of it,"
"It isn't her father's seal," He affirmed, having known that from previous correspondences, the King of Rughad's seal was the head of a snarling wolf. "And also the handwriting,"
"Well, all the more reason to go and see her now," Thaina hummed. "You will give it, right?"
Harun groaned.
"Habibi, promise me you'll go," She urged. "You know she only has you,"
Harun felt his chest tighten, knowing full well how much it hurt his wife to say those words.
"I will,"
Thaina smiled, although it did not reach her chestnut eyes.
"I shall be off then, Baba is waiting for me outside. I will return tomorrow after Mama and I are done with our shopping," she chimed.
Harun grabbed hand before she could leave and pulled her towards him. She turned around and slipped her arms around him, giving him an abrupt squeeze.
"You promise me you won't go into the Souq?"
Thaina laughed whilst shaking her head.
"Uhibbuka," she whispered, then withdrew, skipping out of the hall with her hand waving goodbye.
"I love you too," he replied, just as she slipped out of the doors.
***
Harun cleared his throat.
"I come bearing gifts," He uttered, waiting behind the gossamer curtains that separated him from her private chambers.
"I don't want your gifts," hissed the voice on the other side.
Harun paused for a moment, then said, "Even if it is a letter from Rughad?"
Dalia swiped back the curtain. Her sudden appearance not only surprised him but caused an uncomfortable warmth to emanate from his chest. Her eyes were glittering with anticipation as she glanced at him, before searching for his hands. Her chestnut waves were freed, undone from their usual braid, and on each ear shook gold bell-shaped earrings, dotted with milky white pearls. The scent of sweet jasmine radiated off of her.
When he extended the letter towards her, she grabbed it from him in an instant. She hurried back inside, leaving him once again outside the curtained entrance. But he did not press her for admission, instead flagging down one of the maids.
Inside, Dalia fled to the other end of her chambers, jumping onto the cushions she had assembled to imitate the reading nook she had back home. She assessed the handwriting, heart clenching in recognition. Her vision became blurry with tears as she popped open the seal and slid out the parchment. She could not stop the tears that blotched out her vision, blurring the words in front of her as she glided over them. When she reached the end, where Yasmin and Tarek had signed off, she hugged the letter to her chest, eyes shut tight as rivers continued to stream out of them. She kept her lips sealed shut, afraid that anyone outside would know of her grief, her weakness. Her longing for home.
"May I come in?" called a gentle voice outside. She swept away the moisture on her cheeks and eyes and inhaled deeply to calm her racing heart.
"What is it?" she asked, steadying her voice from shaking.
"I have something else for you,"
Curiosity overcame her as she wondered if there was more that had arrived from Rughad. She strode over to the entrance, keeping her gaze lowered, as she drew back the curtains.
"What is it?" she mumbled, and when he held out the contents he was holding, she discovered that he had acquired some fresh sheets of parchment, along with a feathered quill and a glass vial of ink.
"So you can write back to them," he explained.
Dalia looked up at his eyes. She could have succumbed to the warmth in them, but she refused to out of pride. Instead, she grabbed for the items, only for him to swipe them away from her reach.
"I wanted to apologise about before," he said. "I hadn't intended to humiliate you in front of everyone,"
She scoffed. "So what had you intended then?"
"I did not want you to feel uncomfortable,"
"You mean to let everyone else feel uncomfortable with my presence?" she seethed.
Harun sighed.
Dalia had been fueling herself for this argument but with his defeated response, she felt the embers blow out.
"Here," he said, handing her the items.
Dalia took them one by one, careful not to touch his skin. Even then, her fingers betrayed her as they nonchalantly brushed against his palms, making her heart race and her mind recall when he unpinned her veil.
"Thank you," she uttered, head still lowered, and before she could stop herself she admitted, "The letter was from my siblings,"
Harun nodded. His eyes grazed over her neatly combed waves that framed her youthful face, falling to her red-rimmed eyes and rosy cheeks. She had a slight tremble in her voice, which he knew had been caused by the contents of the letter.
They stood there awkwardly, both unable to determine whether the conversation had ended or not.
Dalia didn't want him to stay but she also didn't want to be alone. Although the King had not pressed much from her, she was sick of being alone.
"Do you want to sit?" Dalia suggested before she could stop herself, feeling her cheeks warm.
Harun had almost declined, opting to give her space as usual, but then he remembered Thaina's words.
She only has you.
Her eyes met his. He could see the turmoil of thoughts in her head; her want to hate him but her need for his company.
His mouth curved into a gentle smile. "Sure,"
Unbeknown to them both, this would be the last night she would hate him.
Glossary:
Sahiba - Lady
Malik - King
Habibi - My Love
Khalati - Aunty
Allah - God
Akhi - Brother
Ameera - Princess
Souq - Market
Shukran Jazeelan - Thank you so much