*edited*
I wasn't gone. Completely. I could hear people talking. Discussing my life. Or lives. My body wasn't here. It was my conscious.
"Lena Fairchild."
The voices faded as I felt myself slowly materialize. I looked around seeing that I was in the cemetery next to the statue of the angels. I still had my runes. My scars were gone. The sun had come up.
"Izzy."
I took off running toward the Institute. I couldn't help the happy tears that streamed down my face. I felt different. I felt lighter than ever before. I felt normal.
I saw shadow hunters going back to the Institute. Most probably coming back from slaughtering Valentine's creations. They all probably thought I was dead.
Well, I was, sort of.
I could feel the pain in my chest as I got closer and closer to the Institute. I followed the crowd inside as everyone swarmed to look over the dead. To find their friends and family. My eyes scanned over everyone, but no one was up there. I ran down the stairs seeing Simon standing in the sunlight.
"Simon!" He was going to get himself killed. He turned smiling. He wasn't burned.
"Lena!" He moved around the fallen pulling me into a hug. "Holy crap."
"How are you alive? How are you not being burned by the sun?" I asked him looking from him to the sun coming through the stained glass window.
"How are you alive?" He asked. I just laughed a little.
"I have no idea."
"Me neither." He smiled. "I'm so glad you aren't dead." He pulled me into another hug.
"I'm sorry," I breathed.
"Why?"
"I didn't save everyone."
I looked down at the bodies of the downworlders. They'd all come together to stop him and they all died because of it.
"I think you are the last person that should be apologizing right now," Simon laughed. He grabbed my hand pulling me toward the back. "We have to tell Clary."
We came around the corner and I saw Luke sitting on one of the hospital beds. A bandage on his side from where Valentine cut him. Clary was sobbing as she gripped his hand.
"Are we crying?" I asked standing beside the bed.
"It's not funny Simon," Clary shook her head.
"Good thing that wasn't me," Simon laughed from the other side of her. She looked up at him and then realized. She turned and saw me.
"Lena!" She threw her arms around me as we held each other. "I thought I'd lost you. I thought—."
"I know, I did too," I breathed. "But I'm okay." We held each other tightly. She was my family.
"Lena," Luke muttered. I leaned back from Clary kneeling next to his cot. He took my hand. "We owe you our lives."
"I didn't save them all," I shook my head. "You don't owe me anything."
"We do," Luke groaned as he tried to sit up. "We do. We owe you everything and more for your sacrifice."
"Is it really a sacrifice if I'm alive?" I asked.
"I'm so glad you're not dead. You deserve better than that," Luke breathed. I squeezed his hand as I stood up.
"Where is Isabelle?" I asked the two of them, but they shook their heads.
"I haven't seen her yet," Clary shrugged.
I didn't feel her die. I took off running as I moved past several other shadow hunters throwing bodies to the sides.
"Lightwoods!" I screamed as I moved into the main room. "Isabelle and Alec Lightwood!"
Everyone looked at me like I was insane. I felt insane. They should be around here somewhere. They had to be. They were okay, right?
"Lilly!" Magnus. I turned seeing Magnus coming down the stairs. He had tears on his face. I moved to him throwing my arms around him. "I thought you were—."
"I was," I said.
He let out a long breath. He pressed his head against mine as he held the back of my head. The hugs felt lighter and heavier than they ever had. They were so full of emotion.
"We have to get you upstairs," Magnus grabbed my arm.
We ran through the halls. I threw the door open to the room and saw Izzy, Alec, and Jace around the room. Tears on their faces.
"This is something I never thought I would see," I smiled as the door cracked against the wood panelling behind me.
Isabelle was the first one up. I couldn't read her. She was happy, sad, pissed, all at once. It was terrifying.
"If you hit me, I will accept that." She pulled me into a hug.
"I hate you," She said.
"I love you too," I smiled as she held me. Her body shook as she cried.
"I felt you die, I felt you leave." She breathed.
"I know, I know, I'm so sorry."
"I saw you disappear," Jace stood up. He came forward. The closer he got the more I could see his red eyes. He activated the soul sword and I destroyed it. "I'm so sorry."
"It's okay, you don't have to apologize," He hugged me. "I would have had to do it either way."
"Stop trying to sacrifice yourself," He glared at me. I laughed a little.
"I don't think I have anything left to sacrifice," I admitted. He pulled me into another quick hug.
"I'm giving you both a few minutes, but only a few," Isabelle smiled.
Her cheeks still gleaming with tears. The door shut behind me as I saw Alec stand. His expression was still shocked as he stared at me.
"I'm sorry," I whispered.
He moved to me, his hand reaching for me. I held him as he buried his head in my neck. The both of us just held each other.
"I heard Izzy's screams," He paused as he leaned back. "I knew—when you before—Lena I've never felt this kind of pain before. Ever." He was breathing heavily almost like he was going to go into a panic attack. "You can't. You can't do that again ever. You can't leave me."
He shook his head. I cupped his cheeks kissing him. He wrapped his arms around my waist keeping me against him. I leaned my forehead against his.
"I love you. I love you and I won't lose you." He clenched his jaw as he struggled to take a deep breath. I smiled looking up at him.
"You love me?" I repeated. He nodded as he took in a short breath.
"More than I thought I could love someone."
"I love you." I echoed. I hated saying the I love you 'too' part. I bit my lip as he smiled. "You're everything to me and so much more, Alec. I'm sorry I made you go through that, but I couldn't let anything happen to you or the others I care for." I reasoned. He shook his head cutting off my words with another kiss making me laugh at him. "I love you with everything I have left in me."
"I also hate your martyr mentality," Alec breathed as he kissed me again.
"Alright that's good enough, I need to hug my parabatai again," Isabelle came through the door.
I could see the dark circles under her eyes from the withdrawals. I laughed as I was passed from one Lightwood to the other.
"I knew you were going to do that," Magnus looked disappointed, but I was okay with it this time.
"Well I tried to tell you, but you wouldn't listen. So I did it on my own," I reasoned as I sat down with Izzy holding onto me.
"It shouldn't have been you," Magnus said.
"Yeah, well someone somewhere decided I needed a fresh start so yeah," I shrugged and leaned back into the couch. "I'm so fucking tired."
"I've gotta go tell Clary how I feel," Jace smiled as he ran for the door. It was like he suddenly was struck with this need to confess.
"Um, what?" I pointed at him.
"He isn't your brother. Valentine lied. He told Clary and him the truth while he was holding the soul sword so he was being honest when he said you weren't related." Alec explained as he sat down on the other side of me taking my hand in his.
"That's diabolical."
***
"Lena." It was an older woman. She had a nicely pressed blazer and skirt on.
Imogen Herondale staring at me. She was the inquisitor. The second to the president of the head power of the clave.
"Fuck." I breathed. "Imogen, you here for Valentine?" I tried to recover, but she already looked disgusted with my presence.
"Walk with me?" She waved her hand as we started to walk down the stairs. "Do you understand what kind of damage you've caused?"
"I destroyed the soul sword," I said.
"You aided Valentine in his overtake of this Institution," She stated. "You didn't stop him from getting the soul sword. You didn't stop him before. Why?"
"I had to get enough demon blood in my system to be able to destroy the soul sword," I explained. "I knew that the downworlders would want Clary dead since they knew she was the key to unlocking it, so I did what I had to do to protect my sister."
She stopped and turned toward me. Her eyes moved up and down my body. I didn't know what she was looking for, but she didn't seem like she found it.
"I suggest you finally start following some rules, Miss Morgenstern. The Clave will only give you so much slack before they bring you to Idris for final execution," She walked off.
She went down to the cells for Valentine. Instead of following her, I went to Izzy. She's been going through severe withdrawals lately and I've been feeling her jitters. I was familiar with this type of itchiness that only one thing will be able to scratch.
"Hey Iz," I sat at the edge of her bed.
"What are you doing here?" Her voice wavered as he body continuously shook. I grabbed the towel near her bedside dabbing her forehead.
"Well I've been yelled at by Herondale, so I'm hiding with you," I said. She smiled but blinked tears streaming down her face. "You're going to be okay. I promise."
"I know, I just have to sweat it out," She shuddered.
I gave her a soft smile. I've been with her for a day or so now just talking with her. I tried to walk her through it, but I wasn't going to baby her. My phone buzzed alerting me that I was needed.
"What is it?" She asked. There was a soft knock on the door. Alec walked in closing it behind himself.
"Demon attack," Alec said. He gave his sister a sad look.
"You both have to go," Isabelle shook. I gave her a look and then Alec. "Go, please." I stood up kissing her cheek as I walked out with him.
"I'm not going," I whispered as he shut the door.
"What?" He asked. I shook my head.
"I'm not leaving. You go with Clary and Jace tell me what it's about. I can't leave her right now," I crossed my arms. Alec nodded and kissed me.
"Thank you," He tucked my hair behind my ear.
"You don't have to thank me, she's a part of me now," I kissed him again accidentally biting his lip as he pulled back. He stared at me his eyes glossing over as his breathing started.
"Sorry. Sorry. You have to go though." I pushed him forward. "When you get back that's a different story." He turned around again kissing me before walking off. I just rolled my eyes watching him leave. I couldn't leave Iz. I knew exactly what she was thinking right now.
It had only been an hour or so, but I heard her door open. She was leaving her room. She'd dressed herself and put on makeup like nothing was wrong. She was going to Rapheal. I'd already talked to him about it. His vampires weren't to touch her.
They weren't supposed to give her anything. He wasn't supposed to give in. If he cared he would stay away until she got better. I'd followed her out of the institute all the way to Dumort.
Inside was a little harder. I couldn't hide from the vampires, but most of them didn't have an issue with me anymore after Raphael told them what I had done. I'd destroyed the soul sword, which protected all of them. All of the downworlders.
I could hear Iz and him speaking softly. When I heard her shoes I hid behind a wall in the shadows as she left the hotel. No marks on her. She went out into the street looking for another vampire den to give her the hit she so desperately needed.
"Hey!" She yelled banging on the metal door. "I know there are vampires in here!"
A man appeared out of the shadows. He wasn't a vampire. He was something else. I'd never seen him before, but he was dressed unusually well.
"Who are you?" Isabelle asked. I moved from my spot pulling my seraph blade free.
"I want to know where the moral cup is?" He yanked her necklace off her chest. It was the one that detected demons.
"That's too bad," I said. He barely had time to turn as my blade went through his body. He obliterated into bats it seemed as he reformed behind me.
"Hey leave them alone!" A mundane yelled as the guy put me in a headlock.
I threw my foot down onto his shoe and shoved my arm into his side as he stumbled back. He gave me a tight smile as he closed his hand. I could see magic pulling into it. Around us, the three mundanes fell that were trying to intervene with us. I turned swiping at his legs then his head and again nothing.
Another guy came out of nowhere jumping around and doing the same thing I was until the man finally left the alley. I stared at the blonde. He wasn't familiar, but he had a familiar fighting style to me.
"Who are you?" Isabelle asked.
"My name is Sebastian," He stood up. "You have a unique fighting style."
He looked at me. He had a trusting face, but I had no idea who he was or why he was here out of now. He had runes like us and no circle tattoo.
"Were you following me?" Isabelle stared at me.
"Parabatai," I raised my eyebrows. "Let's get back."
"I need you to come with me," Sebastian added. "He's after you both. We can use that."
"Why haven't I seen you before?" I asked as I grabbed Izzy's wrist locking her arm in mine.
"I'm not from around here," He spoke. His British accent was a clear tell of that. "I can give her something to help with the withdrawal of the venom."
"How did you know?" Izzy asked.
"The pale skin, darting eyes, and the hand tremor are the worst," He gave me a tight smile. "It's not far."
Isabelle wanted to go with him and I wasn't going to let her go alone. I sighed but walked with her to his apartment. She sat on the couch while I looked around. He seemed suspicious. It was the fact that he turned up with this high-level demon.
"How long have you lived here?"
"My whole life," I said. He walked over to a box pulling out a dropper bottle.
"One drop," He instructed as he walked closer to Iz. "And you'll feel like a new person."
"No." I snapped.
"What is it?" Izzy asked.
"It's medicine," He muttered. He put a small dab on his finger sucking it off. "See. It's from an extract of a root found in L'Isle-Adam. It's a quaint little town." Izzy reached forward taking the bottle and sniffing.
"Look it'll help with the pain of your venom addiction, speed up your recovery." Izzy looked over at me.
"Any symptoms? Will she be addicted, any withdrawals?" I asked. He shook his head.
"Are you always so prickly?" He smirked.
"Yes," I nodded.
"Lena," Izzy muttered. I took a deep breath and shrugged.
"Sure, but if she is addicted to this Sebastian I don't care who you are or where you go. I will kill you," I warned.
He smiled and gestured for Izzy to lean forward putting a drop in her mouth. She swallowed and took a deep breath.
"Woah." She breathed.
"Now it's not a miracle drug. It'll wear off soon and you'll feel like crap again. But it does help get over the first few days," He put the dropper back in the bottle. Izzy smiled and moved her hair back as she touched her hands.
"So why aren't you in the London Institute?" She asked.
"I had to kick my Yen Fin addiction." He admitted. "And let's just say London wasn't the best place to do that." He stood up. "So I uh-took matters into my own hands. I left. And I found my way to New York."
"You went AWOL?" I asked. He smiled.
"I like to think of it more as a walkabout. The good news is I was successful and you can be too," He added. I crossed my arms staring at him.
"We should go," She muttered. "Thank you so much, but I really should get going."
"If you walk out that door, in an hour you will be walking into a vampire den begging for a bite." He said. His eyes moved to me, but I was unconvinced. He really wanted us to stay here. "You know it too."
"I can keep an eye on her." I snapped.
"You need at least a day to get enough venom out of your system to be able to handle yourself," Sebastian added. "I'm just trying to help. If you want to leave I won't stop you."
"Lena, you should go," She told me. I shook my head.
"You stay, I stay," I leaned against the sofa.
"That's true friendship," Sebastian smiled. "I'm going to make some food."
"Let me help," I walked toward the island table. He laughed a little.
"I won't poison the food, I promise," He pulled up his sleeves exposing his other runes.
"Just a precaution. I'm still going to help, it's my kind of thank you for helping Izzy," I added taking off my jacket.
"Very well then, I appreciate your help—." He paused waiting for my name.
"Lena," I introduced myself.
"Lena." He smiled. "That is a beautiful name."