Her eyes fluttered open, only to be met with the bright blue sky above her. She blinked a few times, slowly starting to regain feeling of her body — her head ached, as well as her shoulder and right leg. She gathered enough strength to look to her left, seeing a passed out soldier with bandages around his head lying not too far from her.
What the hell happened?
It'd all happened so fast. The shock of the betrayal still hadn't settled in when the battle had started. Last she remembered, she'd tried to take on Reiner from behind, but he'd ended up swatting her away like a fly. She'd collided with the wall and then everything had gone black. She must've been so high up, how had she not died?
Then it hit her like she'd hit the wall — holy shit, Reiner and Bertoldt are Titans.
People she'd trained with for three years, who she'd relied on for as long; hell, Reiner had acted like a big brother to everyone. Now it turns out they were traitors? They'd been traitors the whole time? It didn't make sense. Why?
Her head was starting to spin.
''Y/n!''
She slowly moved her head to the right, catching a figure running in her direction. Jean almost slid on his knees as he fell down next to her, panting as a droplet of sweat rolled down the side of his face.
Y/n felt herself smile. She was glad to see he was alright. ''Jean—''
''Holy fuck, you scared me,'' Jean spoke as he tried to catch his breath. ''When Sasha got there and told me what'd happened — holy fuck, I'm so glad you're—''
''Jean.'' He shut up the moment he heard her quiet voice, his eyes remaining on hers. ''It's okay. Do you know what happened?''
Jean nodded and gulped. ''Sasha — Sasha said she saw you hit the wall and start to fall. Thankfully she and Armin were able to catch you in time, but you'd passed out and were bleeding from your head. They thought you were . . .'' Jean shook his head. ''Doesn't matter. They brought you up with the other injured. Your shoulder was dislocated but they put it back and your leg got hit by debris, but it'll be okay. You just need rest and you'll be fine.''
Y/n nodded, then winced. ''Fuck.'' Her head had started to pound. Her eyes met Jean's again. ''You know that—''
''Reiner and Bertoldt? Yeah.'' Jean sighed. ''It sucks, but there's no time to grieve about it or whatever. They got away and we're going after them.''
Y/n's eyes widened. ''When?'' She winced as she tried to sit up, her shoulder throbbing. ''My gear—''
''You're not going anywhere,'' Jean said as he put his hands on her shoulders and gently pushed her back down. ''You're too injured to fight. You've been excused from the mission.''
''What?'' Y/n immediately pushed back Jean's hands, sitting up properly despite the pain through her whole body. ''No, I can't be. I'm not that injured, I have to—''
''Since when are you so courageous?'' Jean scoffed. ''You got thrown into the wall, Y/n. You're injured and you're counted as such. You can't come.''
Y/n's whole body filled with dread. ''And you?''
''I'm going.''
Y/n laughed. Her head was spinning, but she fought against it. ''Yeah, no. I'm coming, too, then.'' Jean placed a single finger over her injured shoulder and pain burst through the whole section, causing her to jerk back. ''The fuck?''
''Not injured, my ass,'' Jean said as he pulled his finger away. ''You can't operate your ODM like that. You're staying back. Squad Leader Hange already has a plan . . . we'll get them. It's okay.''
''But it's dangerous and—'' Y/n winced as a wave of pain burst through her head again. She leaned forward, holding onto Jean's arm as she did so. She felt like throwing up. ''Fuck,'' she whispered and closed her eyes, willing for the pain to go away.
Jean sighed and wrapped his arms around her, holding her to close as he made sure not to touch her bad shoulder. ''It's gonna be okay. You need rest.''
Y/n's eyes were still closed as she almost buried her face under his neck. ''I can't rest knowing you might die,'' she mumbled, though she was starting to feel the fatigue take over. She wanted to sleep but she couldn't, not when Jean was still here, not when this might be the last time she'd see him. No, he'll survive. He's strong.
''I won't die, dumbass. It won't be cool dying because of Reiner and Bertoldt,'' Jean whispered back, chuckling in her ear.
Y/n snorted. ''Be careful what you're saying. These might be your last words,'' she said, causing him to snort, too. Her head was spinning too much. ''Be . . . careful.''
''Of course I will,'' Jean said and when he looked down at her, she was breathing slowly. She'd passed out again. He sighed and pressed a kiss on her hair. ''I won't leave you behind, Y/n.''
Then he gently placed her back down on her mat and stood up. He watched her for a moment before he turned around. Reiner will pay for everything.
''Hey, Jean-Bo!'' Jean's head snapped at that, looking at Connie. He stood alongside Sasha, who looked worried as she looked in Y/n's direction, while Connie was smirking with his arms crossed. ''What was that, lover-boy?''
''Tch, don't call me that.'' Jean glared at Connie, though that only made him laugh. Jean scoffed. ''Shut up. We have a mission to go to.''
———
''Just because I got kidnapped, the Survey Corps lost more than half their veteran soldiers. They died trying to rescue me.''
Y/n sat next to Mikasa as the two, Armin and Jean listened to a wide-eyed Eren. Both Y/n and Eren were being filled in on the stats after the battle as both of them had basically slept through it. They were back in the Survey Corpse base in Trost now.
''But there were no casualties on the way back,'' Armin said. ''The Titans completely ignored us and went after Reiner. Jean and I were trying to figure out why that happened. We think the Titans changed their behavior because of you.''
''It's only a conjecture, of course,'' Jean said. ''But there's no other explanation for what happened back there. You're in a tricky position, Eren. Whether or not all those sacrifices were worth it depends on what you do. You have to prove you're worth more than all the lives that were lost. We don't have time to waste.''
Y/n watched Jean in awe at how composed he'd say all of that.
Eren lifted his hand up, his eyes wide in determination. ''Yeah, you're absolutely right. I have to keep going. I'll control the Titans. I'll plug up Wall Maria. I'll capture Reiner and beat some sense into him. That's the bare minimum of what I need to do to make up for all those lives.''
Y/n pursed her lips. Jean didn't say anything as he started walking away. Y/n stood up wobbly with the help of Mikasa, who she thanked before rushing to catch up to Jean. ''Wait for me!''
Jean stopped and turned back, wrapping an arm around her waist as she finally reached him. ''You shouldn't be running on your bad leg, dumbass.''
''I wouldn't if you didn't leave me behind!'' Y/n said as she wrapped an arm around him as well. They continued walking, Jean supporting Y/n as best as he could.
Jean shook his head. ''Sorry, I'm just so confused,'' Jean said. ''So much has happened so quick and I . . .''
''Yeah, I get it. I'm just glad we're both still here.'' Y/n chuckled. ''Gotta be happy about the little things, you know?''
Jean nodded. ''Yeah, I guess so.''
The two fell into comfortable silence. They made it to the other side of HQ and Jean finally made her sit down and take a break. ''I'm fine,'' Y/n reassured him, though her ankle throbbed like crazy. She was still injured and still sported bandages around her head.
It was silent between them. Now that the tension was over for now, they finally had time to breathe and think about things other than Titans. Jean wasn't sure if now was the time to bring it up, but the suspense was starting to kill him. ''Do you remember what you told me before I left for that mission?''
Y/n bit the inside of her cheek and nodded. ''Yeah. I wanted to talk to you.''
Silence. ''. . . About what?''
Y/n took a breath. How was she supposed to start this? ''Okay, uh . . . Okay. So . . . uh, in the future, I'd like to have a house.''
Jean furrowed his eyebrows. ''Okay?''
''Right.'' Y/n nodded. Her collar was starting to feel tight. ''Right and when I come home after a long day, I'll be hungry, right? So it'd be nice if there's food already prepared.''
Jean nodded as well, watching as she fidgeted with her fingers. He nodded. ''Right.''
''Yes and someone will have to cook that food, right?'' Y/n spoke quicker than usual, not looking at Jean at all. ''And you know I can't really cook, and when I come home I'll be tired, right? So—'' Y/n buried her face in her hands and let out a groan. ''Oh my walls, this is so stupid.''
Jean blinked a few times, watching her, his heart beating at triple it's normal rhytm. ''Y/n, are you trying to say—''
''I like you!'' Y/n said, dropping her arms from her face and closing her eyes. ''I like you back and I probably have for ages, but I realized the day you were supposed to leave for that mission and I couldn't tell you, and I'm so, so sorry for leaving you like that when you confessed to me and I feel horrible for making you feel horrible and I—''
''Y/n.'' She shut up as he cut her off, her eyes flying open as she watched him. He had a soft smile on his face and she felt him take her hand in his. ''Don't get too worked up about this. Don't feel pressured to return my feelings, either, I understand—''
''It's not pressure.'' Y/n cut him off at that. She squeezed his hand, feeling more confident now. ''I talked about it with Sasha. She made me realize that I didn't want to see you with anyone else. I've always just assumed we would always be together, but I never really thought what that would mean. And I want it to mean that you'd be there when I come home or vise-versa. There's really nothing that I want more. Well, that and not getting eaten by a Titan, but, you know.''
Jean felt like the air had been sucked right out of him. For two weeks he'd lived with the thought his relationship with Y/n was done for good. He never had high hopes she'd ever return his feelings, but now he felt like he was dreaming. He was terrified he'd wake up back in front of HQ, leaning on the wall as he regretted ever telling Y/n anything. He didn't realize how stressed he'd been until he let out a relieved breath and a small smile spread on his lips. ''You don't know how long I've waited to hear that.''
Y/n chuckled. ''You must really like me, then.''
''You have no idea,'' Jean said, caressing her cheek. He felt her lean in his hand and his heart almost melted. He felt like he was on cloud nine, really.
''I'm really sorry, though.'' Y/n frowned. ''I'm sorry I just ran away like that, back then. I never meant to hurt you. I care so much about you and knowing I hurt you like that—''
''It doesn't matter now,'' Jean said. He caressed her head for a moment, his finger running over the scar he'd given her while saving her back in Trost. He frowned before bringing her in his embrace, holding her to his chest and and runnign a hand through her hair. ''I'm just glad things turned for the better.''
Y/n nodded in his chest. ''Me too. It was so weird not talking to you. I missed your dumb face.''
''Come on, now, how dumb can my face be if you like it back?'' Jean asked, a teasing grin appearing on his face even though Y/n couldn't see it. ''And what was that about you wanting me to cook for you when you come home and stuff?''
Y/n suddenly pushed him back, looking away from him. ''Shut up, I was just trying to prove a point.''
Jean laughed. ''No, no, there was something there. Don't worry, I think it's cute.''
''Ew, don't talk like that, that's weird,'' Y/n said, looking back at him. ''I'd want you to cook for me only if you take actual cooking lessons. I'm not eating omelettes my whole life, nor do I want a food poisoning.''
Jean scoffed at her and stood up. "Shut up, I've been improving! Besides, don't you have a check-up in like ten minutes? We should start heading over."
Unexpectedly, Jean wrapped one arm under her legs and the other across her back and picked her up with ease, causing Y/n to shriek and wrap her arms around his neck. "The hell are you doing!? Put me down!"
Jean shrugged as he started making his way towards the medical room. "Don't want that leg of yours getting worse if you want to keep slaying Titans, no?"
"I can walk on my own! Put me down, Jean-Bo!" Y/n continued protesting, which only made Jean laugh even more. Y/n huffed and stopped thrashing. "Fine, then. Do all the work. I don't care."
She couldn't help but smile as she fully leaned into his embrace and listened to him rambling about what an idiot she was for wanting to worsen her injury. Y/n wasn't sure how much longer either of them had to live. But it didn't really matter — as long as she got to spend the remainder of her possibly short life, she was glad she would be able to do it with Jean by her side.