A crowd had formed near the stage. All other shit before the coronation didn't matter. I just want my friends to win already.
Aiden and I watched as the prom king was the first one to be announced. Jeric, Sean, and three other guys were lined up on the stage.
Jeric looked like a shy potato whereas Sean looked like he owns the place.
Dripping with confidence—I guess that's why he won.
The crowd went wild when the name Sean Caron was announced. Amused, I watched as Sean shook Ms. Xi's hand followed by Mr. Amble's, and finally Mr. Camillo's. Brazenly, Sean not only shook the other man's hand, but also gave him a pat on the shoulder. The crown looked perfect on Sean.
There was clearly room for more celebration. Jie's name was called out right after, deeming the woman as the queen.
The pair looked wonderful on the stage as they received applause from everyone. Then came the short speech. Sean's was short, simply thanking everyone who voted whereas Jie's seemed like she had the whole thing planned out beforehand with a mental list of people to thank including me.
We were eventually back in our tables by the time Mr. Amble started with the closing remarks. My phone buzzed in my purse.
Dick Camillo: something came up rose
Dick Camillo: i dont think i can make it tonigit
Dick Camillo: im so sorry
Way to hurt me again, Mr. Camillo.
I was going to fight with him over text when I felt someone forging holes through my cheek. It was him.
'I'm sorry,' the man mouthed before he exited the room with a serious expression on his face and speed in his strides. I rolled my eyes. I won't let him ruin my night.
Once the rest of the festivities at WL came to an end, we were set to go to the afterparty. Aiden and I waited outside for Jared, Aiden's jacket now around my shoulders. He smelled expensive.
"How was it?" Jared asked when we got inside.
"Amazing," I said to the driver who probably experienced the opposite while having to wait the whole night, "I'll text you the address of the after party."
The prom king was the host of the after party. Sean's separated cabin in their lot was packed with students, some not even from Goldenlux. I took a bag I left in the car that contained a simple red romper that ties to the front. I changed into that and gave Jared the gown to bring home.
I put my hair up in a ponytail because it was getting very hot in house, and I didn't just mean in the literal sense.
I mean that Jie and Jeric have locked themselves in the bathroom; that Aiden was shirtless on the dance floor, showing everyone his newly learned stripper moves; there's a couple in the pool eating each other's faces off; the kitchen has baseball players singing to Taylor Swift as they do body shots off a sex doll. It was wild in all directions.
Nikolas texted me an hour ago to apologize again. I haven't replied and I didn't plan to.
I walked into the main house which was also filled with people, but nothing compared to Sean's little detached sanctuary. In times like this is when I miss Viktor and Dani the most. They would love this party.
With that thought, I took my phone out and as I sat on the puffy sofa, making sure not to go near the patch of wetness on the far end. Fucking disgusting.
I scrolled through my contacts until I found Dani's number. Before I could push it, Dick called.
I rejected the call.
But he called again.
I waited until the ringing was over. When it finally stopped, I was going to press Dani's contact when in a split second, Nikolas called again. Grumbling, I answered.
"What?"
"Rose, hi," Nikolas began, "I'm sorry, Rose."
"It's fine," I had a feeling that the apology was for many of his faults and not just the recent one.
"Rose," Nikolas sighed and I heard the spring of a mattress and a thump, "I'm so fucking confusing."
"Yes, you are," I played with my acrylic nails.
Nick let out a shaky breath, "I deserve to be called a dick," he added, followed by broken laughter. Despite my surroundings being loud, all I could hear was Nick's voice.
"Are you okay?" I sat up straight after feeling a growing lump in my chest.
"Baby, when have I ever been okay?" he replied breathlessly. "Thanks for asking, though. Only you and Benjamin ask me that, but it's his job, so—"
"Nick, are you drunk?"
"You shouldn't worry about me so much. I'm a big jerk. In fact, you can slap me Monday morning."
I got up and searched for Aiden in the crowd. Jared had just taken the car to redeliver my dress. I needed a ride.
"Rose?" spoke Nikolas.
"I can't believe you," I spat, 'I'm on my way."
"Don't let me ruin your night. Go have fun," I heard his footsteps against the carpet floor, then hiccups, "I want you to have fun. I'm no fun."
I rolled my eyes, "Stay there, Nick. I mean it."
I hung up and continued my search for Aiden. Instead, I found Sean.
"Rosa!" he shouted happily. His smile then faltered when he saw the frown I sported, "What's wrong?"
"I-I can't find Aiden. I need him to take me somewhere," I explained, eyes going crazy as I looked around.
"Where? What happened?" he gently held my elbows, making me stop from moving so much.
"I need to get to Nikolas's house," my shut my eyes tightly and opened them again—an attempt at getting a hold of myself, "There's something I-I just need to—something's wrong and..."I gave up on linguistics.
"You don't have to explain anything to me," Sean licked his lips and grabbed my hand, "Come on, I'll take you there."
I didn't have time to protest and I didn't want to. Sean led me to his car and I strapped myself in the passenger's seat.
"Are you sure you're okay to drive?" I asked quietly.
"Yup," he started the engine, "I didn't drink much. I'm the host, after all."
How convenient. I simply nodded and let him steer the vehicle out of the driveway and down the street.
"Tell me where to go," Sean told me.
"Sure," I gnawed at the inside of my cheek. I was getting anxious. "Thank you so much, Sean."
Instead of a verbal reply, the prom king only nodded. I suddenly felt the tiredness that came with the eventful night. It was like an itch to my growing anxiety. The trip only lasted five minutes, but it felt like five hours—each second like a dreadful minute that made up the sixty minutes of agony.
"You're gonna be fine, right?" he asked quietly when the car came to a stop.
"Yes," I answered too quickly. Nikolas's house was literally ten steps away.
"I believe you," said my friend.
"Thanks, Sean," I held his hand and squeezed, "For everything."
Why did I sound like I'm about to die?
"See you on Monday, Rosa," he told me before I opened the door and met the chilly wind. Sean didn't leave too soon. He waited until I made it to the door. He waited until I knocked and until Nikolas opened the door for me. It was then that I heard the car drive away.
When the door swung open, I already smelled it: alcohol. It was only when I arrived did I realize that I forgot to consider if Bianca was home. I guess I just assumed that she left, as she usually does.
And also because I didn't give a shit about the woman.
Nikolas was still in his slacks and dress shirt, the latter now crumpled and untucked. I walked into the house, shoving the man to the side and locked the door close.
"I deserve that," his voice was thick as he spoke.
"Where is it?" I asked the man.
"Where's what?"
"The alcohol, Nikolas."
The man looked confused as he pointed to the kitchen. On the counter was a big bottle of his choice already downed to half. Beside that was an already empty one.
"I have high tolerance," he muttered as he leaned against the door frame. I grabbed the bottle and dumped it in the trash can.
Nikolas watched my every move. I faced him and crossed my arms in front of my chest, feeling defiant with my stance. Nick's expression was blank, almost giving nothing away, if it weren't for his big brown eyes. They looked sad and torn and all things a broken man represents. It almost made me feel as if I took his happy, gleaming ones for granted.
"What happened?" I'm pretty sure I sounded deadly.
"She found everything... bottles and bottles and bottles, empty and not. I wasn't careful enough, I got sloppy."
"And?"
"She said things," he told me.
"What things?"
"Unnecessary," he muttered.
"I think they're pretty damn necessary if she had you acting like that. "
"I think I have the right to keep things confidential, Rose."
"Then keep it confidential. That doesn't change my opinion on that woman. You've told me enough stories to know what she's like and I definitely don't like her."
"It's my fault this time, okay? We fought because of me."
"All the more reason why I need to know," I rolled my eyes and set them on the floor. "You know how stubborn I can be. I won't stop until you tell me so might as well tell me now."
His voice raised, nearing a shout that had me feeling cold, "She asked if I was some kind of addict and told me that it'd be a fucking disgrace if I was."
Red. I saw red. Bright, unadulterated red.
"Divorce her, Nick."
"It's easy for you to say because you're not in my position," he argued.
"What does that woman have on you, huh?"
"You won't understand, Rose," he yelled, "Life isn't that easy. You might not see it now, there are just some things you have to try and try and try and fucking try for."
In the heat of the moment, I yelled back, "If you have to try that much, then maybe it's just not working, Nick. I don't know if you really believe that things can still work between you two or if you're just in fucking denial."
His face softened, but his frame remained strained with tension.
"I don't want this for you," my voice came out weak and shaky, but that's what made it speak volumes.
Nick hung his head down, "I don't want this either. Do you not think that I'm trying, Rosaleen?" his voice cracked at the end, doing the same damage to a curve of my heart.
"I know you're trying."
And I wish I could tell him to try harder but I knew it sounds easier that it seems. "And I'm happy that you're trying," I took a step closer, "I saw how much you tried and I'm proud of you. That's why it hurts to see you throw your efforts away."
I couldn't see his face, but I didn't miss the way his jaw tightened, "I'm a disappointment. I'm a disappointment to myself, to Bianca, to Benjamin, to the fucking school, and now I'm a disappointment to you. I don't want you to see me like this."
My tears were threatening to spill. They were starting to sting.
I reached for his hand, "Nick—"
"Why are you even here? Why the hell are you even here?" he finally lifted his head and the slight wetness around his eyes twisted my heart.
I swallowed, "B-Because I'm a disappointment to my brother," I shook my head and reached for his hand again, "I'm a disappointment to GA, I'm a disappointment to my friends for leaving them, and I'm a disappointment to myself."
Because you're right, Mr. Camillo—I shouldn't settle for you, but I'm doing it anyway.
Nikolas turned his head to the side as if looking at me would make his world crumble.
"I'm flawed in so many ways and I try hard not to let anyone know, but it gets tiring sometimes and that's absolutely okay."
I intertwined my fingers with his, "I understand, Nick. That's why I'm here."
"Don't say that, Rose," he spoke through clenched teeth, voice thick with emotion, "You're reminding me how much I don't deserve you."
"Let's say that you don't," my thumb rubbed circles around his knuckles, "Are you going to live with the fact that you don't deserve me or are you going to change so you do?"
Deep in my skull was a part of me with doubts which was something I didn't need at the moment. It was saying 'Look at you. He can't even change for his wife, why do you think he'll change for you?'
"I believe in you, Nick. If there are people who don't, then you can send their asses to me and I'll deal with them," the tears started falling and they didn't stop.
"Damn it, Rose," he wiped my tears away with his thumbs after releasing my hand, leaving it to fall limp on my side, "You're too beautiful to cry for me."
"You're making me cry," it came out as an ugly whine which had both of us laughing.
I'm calling it: we're crazy. Nikolas Camillo and Rosaleen Martin are bonkers and that's why they're in the same room. Not only were we crazy, but also stupid. We're so fucking crazy and stupid that I don't think anyone can understand if we explained whatever the hell was happening.
"I know. I know," he kept wiping the tears away as if they're gonna just stop flowing if he did so.
"That's why you should stop doing shit like this," I hit his arm out of frustration which made him pull me against him, making makeup stain his shirt.
"I'll try," he muttered against my hair.
We stayed like that—locked in an embrace, letting his comforting warmth bring me solace. Nikolas Camillo was far from perfect, but I was never looking for anyone perfect to begin with. I guess I was looking for someone who can make me feel, and this gorgeous, tainted, and wonderfully unhinged human succeeded in doing just that.
I tried to get him into bed but he refused, saying that he'll sleep on the couch instead. I decided to stay a little longer, just until I'm sure that he was sound asleep.
Sleep came quick for Nikolas and I'm guessing that it's because of the alcohol. He was snoring softly through parted lips which I pecked.
Just before I slipped from his arms, tiptoed to the door, and left him for the night, I kissed his forehead. Then, I whispered,
"I love you."