●○Kayla○●
Please be negative....
Ackeem steps further inside of the bathroom with his eyes glue to the pregnancy tests.
God please mek eh be negative
He look up at me for answer but all I can do is lower my eyes from his and step back. I couldn't see the result from the distance I am but ackeem could and by the looks on his face, get my knees weak.
Dhat cah be positive enu... mi cah guh thru ntn more rite now....
He looks up at me with sadness mixed with anger in his eyes and I know instantly what the result is. He turn away and walk out of the bathroom without saying a word which scares the living hell out of me.
Boii mi cah be suh bad lucky
I peep over with one eyes on the tests but in no time both eyes widen when I see the two bright pinkish lines printed out on both test.
Dhis nuh real...
"Kayla!" Ackeem voice sternly calls which startled me.
"Yea" I faintly answers as I tear my attention from the tests.
I slowly walks out of the bathroom and see him sitting at the edge of the bed, staring out of space.
"Weh yuh plan fi duh?" He asks without sparing me a glance.
"A-abort it" I says lowly.
Mi nuh affi too look into eh deep fi kno dhat....
My body feel likes it's crumbling down, dizziness showers over me and I just don't know how much more I can bare.
Ackeem hiss his teeth while looking up to the ceiling. "Mi cah deal wid dhis" He says, standing on his feet.
"Every minute is a different bloodclaat problem bredda" he hiss.
"Ackeem mi nah kip eh becaz mi kno a nuh your's" I cry, trying to reach out to his hands but he pulls away. "Nuh leave mi one fi deal wid eh please, mi neva ask for it and-- I break down In to tears.
"Mi cah continue a live suh yuth, dhis a too much fi mi tek up... The ole blooclaat community kno wah gwan bredda and now dhis ya" he curse.
"Wah ya seh Ackeem?" I asks, sobbing.
"Yaffi go gwan yuth and guh sort out yu self... mi done wid dhis ya" he turn his eyes to me and seriousness stands out vividly in them.
"Ackeem please no do dhis to mi, not now when mi so vulnerable and hurt... please" I get a hold of his hand as tears falls down my face. "Mi will duh an abortion as soon as possible and we can move pass this just please help mi go thru dis" I cry leaning on his shoulder.
"Kayla" he ease me off of him and hold both of my hands in his. "Yaffi left yuth, mi cah keep on a pretend like everything good wen mi kno eh no gud. Just leave mi place" he pushes away my hands.
He grab his phone from the bed and walk away leaving me alone to deal with my trauma. I cup my mouth as I slide to the floor and cry harder.
Why mi God?
What mi do fi deserve such treatments..
Mi not even tap mourn fi mummy yet and another wave of problem tek mi...
I cried until I feel like no more tears is left inside of me. I stare at myself in the bathroom mirror and I have never seen my self this scary before.
My eyes are red, puffy and full of bag underneath them. My hair looks so nappy and need combing and I have lost a lot of weight.
_-_
"Tap cry nuh Kayla" Shantel begs as she try soothing me.
"Mi nuh know how to, mi just lost" I sob quietly.
I spend the night at her house because I was afraid to be alone at my house. Monique comes as soon as morning break and from morning they have been trying to get me to calm down so I can think straight of what I want to do.
How can I keep a child that is made my such brutal act? A child that will constantly remind me of what happened to me on my twenty forth birthday... I know it's a innocent child but I can't bring it to life and I won't.
"Yuh sure yuh no wah tek a day or two fi really thing dhis thru K?" Monique asks, she rubs her hand upa nd down my back in a comforting way.
"No" I shake my head side do side. "Mi nuh wah no pickney suh Monique" I sniffs.
"Mi know but what if it too old fi abort and ntn go do yuh" she says with a worried look on her face.
"A true Kayla, it risky and yuh still nuh know if a fi Prezii" Shantel joins In.
"A nuffi him Shantel, mi sure sure and him know too dhats why him wah mi lef him place becaz a Dam- his name remind me of what he did and I break down into tears.
"Hush" Shantel leans me over on her chest while she and Monique try to soothing me.
"Mi nuh care how risky it be, me a dash eh weh" I ease my head from her chest and stand up. "Unu a follow mi or not?" I asks looking between them both.
"Yes" they answer being supportive.
"Call blacks fi cum pick we up Shantel" Monique says her.
The sooner the better...
__________
About a hour after, blacks drops us off in the town and we walk to Dr. Robertson's office. Once again they ask if I am sure of my decision before we enter the building and my answer remains.
"Dung ya eva full" Shantel murmurs, as we step Inside and see about thirteen person waiting.
"Mi seh" Monique nod in agreements.
"Mi fraid fi talk" I whispers to them.
I have never done this before and I am always against it but this is exceptional. I will be living a miserable life and a tormenting one too if I have this child. I don't think I could ever love he or she so I have to do this.
God please Forgive me but you understand...
"Come" Shantel pulls me behind her to the front desk.
Everyone eyes is on us and I just hate how Jamaican people don't mind them damn business. Imagine them come to see the doctor because them either sick or them love one's sick and them a fast in a my business.
Mi cah like fass people a swear...
A young lady that seems to be in her early thirties sits around the desk going through some documents.
"Good afternoon Miss" Monique says knocking on the counter getting her attention.
"Yes" she looks up from the documents with a slight frown on her face.
"We are here to see Doctor Robertson" Shantel says with a little attitude.
"All three of you?" She asks looking between us confuse.
"No just me" I answer lowly.
"Wi a cum in deh wid yuh enu" Monique says and I nod.
"Is it your first time here?" She asks.
"Yes" I answers.
She get a piece of paper with a pen in her hand before talking again.
"What's your name, address, phone number and date of birth?" She asks at one.
"Kayla Mullings, 34 east street, kgn, 8764761235 and Oc-
I pause at my birthday day and again I feel like I'm about to break down when it's time to say my birthday and remember what happen on that day.
"October 18, 1999" Shantel answer for me while Monique try to calm me down.
"Ok, have a seat and listen for your name" she finish off.
We take a seat at the extreme back to avoid the stares of the other people. I couldn't take no one judging me even though they don't know why I am here.
But mi did deh all ova d news.. nub wonda why dhem a luk suh...
"You hungry?" Monique asks.
"No" I answers.
"Yu affi eat enu Kayla" she says.
"Yes look how yuh a get mawga" Shantel added.
"Shantel" Monique looks up at her sternly.
"Wah? A tru-
"Jus shut up" Monique hiss her teeth.
The wait was long but soon my name call and we all went in to see the doctor. I was afraid to say why I am here but then he talk with me and makes me feel comfortable.
"Do you atleast want to do a ultrasound to see how far along are you?" He asks.
"No, base on my last period as you said, I'm almost 8weeks so there will be no complications?" I look up at him and he nod.
"Ok let's get to it then" he tap his desk twice with his pen before going Into one of the draw that is attach to his desk.
He pulls out some white pills and stretch one to me.
"Take this one now" he says as he hands me a bottle of water after.
"Now this one you will take later today" he gives me another pill that I take and carefully put inside of my bag.
"Come back in two weeks so that I can prescription some antibiotics incase you develop any infections" he says with a smile.
"That's it?" I asks and he nodd.
"Ok, thank you" I stand up and gives him a small smile while lowering my gaze from his.
"Ms. Mullings, you don't have to be ashame of what you did. I know you think it througg and made your best decision" he says.
"Yeah" I nodd.
Monique and Shantel thank him as well on our way out. We paid at the front desk then head out. I feel a bit relief from one problem and now I just need to work on the others.
"What we ago eat becaz hungry a strike me?" Monique whine.
"Kfc" I give out and they both look at me. "A wah, mi hungry now?" I roll my eyes at them.
"Ntn"
"Finally"
We go to the nearest Kfc and the line there's long. One thing kfc line ago long and if me did drive we would get thru at the drive thru quicker.
We order our food and decide to eat there, so we find a empty table at the side and we sit there. I then open my box and the delicious food scent assault my nostril.
"Mi ago find a place rent and start over mi life fresh" I break the silence between us.
"Wah?" Shantel asks surprise with the chicken leg stuck at the side of her mouth.
"Why?" Monique asks sadly.
"Mi nah go back down a mummy becaz she nuh deh there and it hard fi live without her and the way Ackeem deal wid mi yes2day, mi ago juss leave him place" I told them.
"Ya lef we Kayla?" Monique asks almost in tears.
"No just east street and Ackeem, unu ago welcome a mi yaad when ever unu want. Wi still ago link up and talk on phone but I need to do dhis fi get ova da trauma ya" I says before sipping from my juice.
"So wah bout the salon?" Shantel asks.
"Ago look a station on the town and move mi things dem... mi nuh want fi be reminded or see Ackeem" I spit his name out bitterly.
"Mi lost mi appetite" Monique grumble, pushing her food aside and lean her head into her palm.
"Monique no feel nuh way becaz wi friendship still remains... yuh know how much mi love yuh and shantel...... I hold my head up to blink the tears away. "Unu always deh there fi mi whether mi up or dun so mi wud neva tun mi back pon unu" I assure them both.
"Wi wah d best fi yuh and anything ya do, yuh have wi support" Monique smiles.
"Yeah girl, so when ya staat look place an....
We continue eating as I take their suggestion on some area I can start looking for a place to rent. I feel like this is one of the best decision I have made to leave East street and Ackeem for good.
-_-
One thing me hate and a packing, mighty it takes up alot of time. Right now I have two large and I mean really large suitcases, spread across the floor. I move back and forth the walking closet and dresser drawers with my clothes, dropping them inside of the suitcase.
I didn't even realize that I have so many clothes here until now.
Wen mi settle mi fold dhem up ya mhon...
I have a house to go and view later today but first I want to clear my things out from his place. I strain to get the suitcases to close up but I did it. I then open a large travelling bag and start throwing my shoes inside of it.
I have a hard time getting the suitcases down the stairs but eventually I did it. Heaving a sigh, I march back up the stairs and pull down the bag with my shoes.
"No sa, me tiad" I sweep sweats from forehead as I take some minute to rest.
"See yuh car key deh pon eh table" Ackeem says from the living room.
I hiss my teeth before grabbing my suitcases and wheel them towards the door.
Yuh juss ago lef suh afta wah him put you thru?
Sell it rawse and buy a different one...
I stop in my tracks on the idea that pops up inside my head. I turn back and walks Inside of the living room where I see him Playing video game.
"Try memba weh yuh duh tuh mi and karma real" I says to him before grabbing the car keys from the table.
I walk out with my heart hurting but I know this is another decision I won't regret.
______________________________________
Thank you for reading.....
Chapter 30 up next...