WEDNESDAY AM
You'd discovered you were pregnant three days ago and were now back in the UK, packing for Abu Dhabi and in utter turmoil. You hadn't told Toto as he'd jetted off ahead of you on the Monday so you hadn't shared the news with a single soul. You'd told Rosie it was a bout of food poisoning mixed with exhaustion and she'd not questioned things further.
Logically you knew you had landed yourself in this situation thanks to your own stupidity but you couldn't help but feel unlucky. You'd had one slip-up where you'd not been careful and it had been a bullseye. Having gone to your local doctor in Oxfordshire, he had confirmed that you were three months along, meaning that you must have conceived in France. Ever since this revelation you had cursed French wine and Toto's charm. You were never the type to not be careful and it just went to show that it only takes one time to change your life forever.
As you were a little way along you were already due to have a twelve-week scan but in your heart of hearts, you knew you couldn't do it without telling Toto. You'd told the concerned doctor that you'd book it in once you were back from Abu Dhabi and discuss options moving forward. Time wasn't on your side but you'd begun weighing up what to do and knew you had a short window in which you could decide whether or not to move forward with the pregnancy.
Packing was a challenge as although you were nowhere near debuting a baby bump, you'd put on a few pounds around your breasts and hips and nothing fit
as it should. Prior to last week, you'd pegged it down to overindulging while travelling but now you weren't so confident. Shaking your head as you put yet another too-small skirt back into your wardrobe you reached for a loose kaftan-style dress, hoping you wouldn't stand out too much. You had a sponsor lunch with Toto the following day and you always made an effort to dress to impress.
Sighing, you finished packing for what would be the final time this season and made your way downstairs to wait for the car that would take you to the airport. You were flying commercial with Sophie and knew everything always took longer than when you flew via private jet.
THURSDAY AM
Having landed late on Wednesday evening you'd gone straight to your hotel room and straight to bed. Unusually, Toto was staying in a different hotel as the company travel department had had trouble squeezing the whole team into one hotel, leaving the team split in half. Fortunately, they had split the team by department so your direct reports were all nearby.
This meant, however, that you had to take a ten-minute taxi ride to meet Toto in his hotel lobby ahead of your sponsor lunch. He'd offered to pick you up but it would have meant him doubling back on himself as the restaurant you were going to was nearer to his hotel. As your car drew up to the front of his hotel you were apprehensive. You didn't want to hide anything from Toto but equally, it was not fair to drop this news on him ahead of a business lunch or what was sure to be a tense and stressful weekend. You just had to sit it out for three days and not alert suspicions. Easy peasy.
Crossing the lobby you spotted your beau waiting for you, leaning jauntily against a marble column. As he met your eyes he broke out into a wide grin, obviously as happy to see you as you were him.
"Hey stranger," he said, giving you an awkward pat on the shoulder before leaning down and whispering, "I want to kiss you but it's frowned upon here."
You giggled, Toto was always proper, "That's fine, bold of you to assume I wanted to kiss you."
"You're so mean to me." he said, before looking you up and down, surveying your outfit and adding with a smirk "Nice outfit by the way, are you trying to blend in with the locals?"
You narrowed your eyes, knowing that the breezy kaftan was not a typical you-outfit, "Perhaps, I fancied a change."
Toto smiled, "I like it actually, you look very... elegant."
Bursting out laughing, you replied, "Smooth save."
Toto laughed, resting his hand on the small of your back, "Shall we go? Our car is waiting."
"Sure, but no touching Mr., don't want to give people the wrong idea," you said, poking your tongue out.
"I'm helping you walk," he said, chuckling as you made your way out of the hotel lobby.
– – –
Fortunately for you, lunch passed quickly, with the sponsors agreeing to a new three-year deal, leaving you and Toto beaming. You'd been apprehensive about the meeting following on from the PR disaster that had hit the team last week but fortunately, the majority of suppliers accepted that it was a planted story. The deal was toasted with the same sparkling rosewater that the drivers would be spraying on the podium so luckily you didn't even need to feign drinking.
As you made your way back to the car that would take you to Toto's hotel, Toto's phone rang.
"Do you mind if I take this, it's my lawyer?" he asked.
"Of course, take it!" you said, "I'll wait here."
As you settled down on a cushy chair in the entrance of the restaurant, Toto made his way outside for some privacy. You were curious about what the latest was but knew that these kinds of things took time and it was likely just a courtesy call.
You took the brief reprieve to catch up on your emails and messages, your job busy as ever. You were grateful for your team, often fielding and solving issues before they even came to you, however, last week had been an unprecedented challenge and your inbox was still full of tabloid journalists looking for gossip.
As you typed yet another "No comment" response, Toto made his way back towards you, a wide smile on his face.
"Good news?" you asked, gathering your phone and notebook up.
"Yes and no." said Toto, "The man in contact with Lara is one of the Red Bull senior management, so not Christian."
Your eyes widened as you made your way out of the restaurant alongside Toto, "To be honest, I'm not surprised. Christian's smart, if he did have anything to do with it, he would have gotten someone else to do his dirty work."
"Exactly," said Toto, deep in thought.
THURSDAY PM
Having wrapped another relentless media day, thankfully the last one of the season, you were now settled into Toto's room for the evening, curled up on the balcony watching the glorious sunset, with a book in hand, while Toto took a shower. Thoughts raced through your mind at one hundred miles an hour, overthinking all of the possible scenarios that would follow you telling Toto your news. You'd known each other a while but hadn't been romantically involved for that long and you had never even discussed whether Toto wanted any more children. You knew you had to tell him asap but finding the right time was going to be tricky.
"Y/N." came a deep voice from the patio door.
"Hey, feeling better?" you asked, turning around to the easy-on-the-eyes sight of a shirtless Toto with a towel wrapped around his waist.
"Yes, I feel human again." he said, walking out onto the balcony and ducking down to kiss your forehead, "Sorry I was grumpy earlier."
You laughed, patting his shoulder, "It's okay, we all have those days." Toto had been in a foul mood all afternoon, a culmination of being grilled by journalists about his private life and suffering in a long-sleeved shirt in the extreme Abu Dhabi heat.
"What did I do to deserve you?" he asked with a grin, "Can I get you a drink?"
Suddenly in a panic, you replied hastily. "I'm fine with water, thanks."
Toto raised his eyebrows, knowing that you normally loved a glass of wine after a long, difficult day. "Are you feeling okay?"
"Yes, I just have a small headache, I think I didn't drink enough water today," you said, hoping he'd buy it.
"Do you need paracetamol?" he asked, looking concerned.
"No, no," you said, "I already took some, don't worry."
Still looking a little worried, Toto seemed to believe your cover story, "If you're sure. I might get a beer if it's okay?"
"Of course it's okay," you said, laughing at his ever-impeccable manners. "Come join me, it's nice out here with the breeze."
"If you're sure," he replied, disappearing back into the room before promptly returning with a cold beer in one hand and a glass of water in another.
"Come here," you said, scooching over on your sunlounger to make room.
"I'm not going to fit there!" he said, looking down suspiciously.
"You'll just have to get cosy with me," you said, batting your eyelashes.
"If I absolutely have to," he said with a smirk, setting the drinks down on the side table and ducking down to lie down beside you, pulling you across onto his chest as he lay down on his back.
"This is nice," you said, resting your head on his bare chest, feeling his heart racing.
"Mmm," he said, pulling you closer and tracing circles on your hip. "I wish we could do this all day."
Smiling, you felt his heart slowing down as he relaxed, "After tomorrow we can."
Toto sighed, "I've never needed the break so badly."
"I know, I don't like seeing you so stressed," you replied, feeling guilty that you were keeping a secret that would only add to his woes.
"You de-stress me," he said, clutching you even closer.
"I try," you said, feeling even worse.
FRIDAY AM
Having dozed off on the sunlounger, you and Toto had dragged yourselves to bed, falling asleep as soon as your heads hit the pillow. Waking up, you felt rejuvenated, you'd needed a peaceful sleep after the chaos of the last few weeks.
Carefully extracting yourself from a still-asleep Toto's arms (he loved a cuddle) you tip-toed to the bathroom to get ready for the day. You'd planned to head to the gym with Toto but life had other plans as you caught a glimpse of yourself in the mirror.
"Fuck." you said out loud, turning sideways to see that your stomach had suddenly curved ever so slightly outwards overnight. It wasn't enough to look like a bump but it was noticeable and you knew that your gym kit would leave no room to hide, raising questions.
"Everything okay?" asked a voice from outside the bathroom. Toto had obviously woken up and heard your cursing.
"Yes, just tripped over the bathmat," you said, wrapping yourself in a robe and trying not to rouse suspicion as you opened the door to let Toto in. "By the way, I think I might skip the gym for a swim this morning."
"Oh." he replied, obviously a little disappointed that you wouldn't be joining him, "Is everything okay?"
"Yep, all good." you said, "I just don't want to overdo it."
"If you're sure." he said, "Maybe I could come for a swim with you?"
"No." you blurted out, far more harshly than you intended.
"Just a suggestion," he said, his eyebrows raising.
"Sorry, I didn't mean it like that, I just know that you prefer the gym," you said, making your way over towards him.
"Are you sure you are feeling okay Y/N? I've been worried about you since Brazil." Toto replied, looking down at you curiously.
"I'm fine," you said, stretching up for a quick kiss.
"If you're sure," said Toto, looking unconvinced.
– – –
Toto had left for the gym, leaving you to deal with your latest problem. You felt guilty about lying to Toto about going for a swim but you needed peace and quiet to gather your thoughts. And more pressingly, figure out how you were going to fit into your normally snug-fitting Mercedes uniform.
You'd tried stretching your trousers to fit but it seemed beyond the realms of physics that you were going to fit into them. Desperate times called for desperate measures and you called Rosie in a panic.
"Hey Y/N, what's up?" she replied, sounding somewhat sleepy.
"Morning Rosie, I am sorry to call you but I have a small emergency," you said.
"Shit, what's happened now," she said, suddenly sounding much more lucid.
"Oh no no, nothing bad, don't worry. Basically, I've gained a few pounds and my uniform doesn't fit. Could I possibly borrow your spare set?"
At that, Rosie burst out laughing. You could hear George stirring awake in the background, inquiring as to who was calling so early. "That's the emergency? Sure I'll come over. Are you in Toto's hotel?"
"Yep, room 754." You said, "Thank you so much, you are a lifesaver."
"I'll be right there," she said, hanging up.
– – –
Not five minutes had passed when there was a gentle knock on the door. Rosie was once again to the rescue.
"Morning," you said as you opened the door to a bleary-eyed Rosie sporting her pyjamas and a Mercedes-branded tote bag.
"Morning," she replied sleepily, stepping into the room. "So I have two different sizes of uniform and I brought them both."
"Oh my God, Rosie you are a lifesaver, thank you thank you." you squealed as she handed you two pairs of trousers and two shirts, "Can I try both?"
"Sure," she said kindly, "I'm sure the smaller set will be better since you're much smaller than me."
"I'm not so sure about that," you said furtively, heading into the bathroom.
"Well, you know what they say about people in relationships," she said, from outside the door.
"Huh?" you replied, sticking your head out as you struggled with the smaller pair of trousers.
"You pile on the pounds when you're happy," she said laughing.
Grimacing, you wriggled around, fighting the waistband "I must be super happy then, looks like it will be the bigger pair."
"Sheesh! You really have piled on the pounds," said Rosie, before backtracking when she saw your face drop, "I'm just joking, oh my gosh I would kill to look like you!"
Struggling to fight back the tears, you decided it was now or never to spill, "Rosie, don't freak out."
Now it was Rosie's turn to say "Huh?" your best friend and confidant looking curiously at you. "What's wrong Y/N?"
"I'm pregnant." you blurted out.
Rosie's face went through a full circle of emotions as she processed the news, her initial shock turning into a smile that then dropped as she considered the ramifications. "Are you sure?"
"Yep." you gulped, "Remember in France, when I had the scare and then in Brazil when I wasn't feeling well and you made me go to the medic?"
"Fuck, I knew something was up!" said Rosie, so shocked that she'd had to take a seat on the ottoman at the foot of the bed.
"Yep," you said, tears now fully flowing as you sat down beside her in your still unbuttoned too-small trousers.
"Oh love, it's going to be okay." she said, putting her arm around you, "What did Toto say?"
"Nothing... I haven't told him yet," you said bashfully.
"You haven't told him?" Rosie asked incredulously, "You need to tell him Y/N!"
"I know, but there hasn't been the right moment," you said.
"Aw Y/N, don't cry, you'll make me cry!" said Rosie, her eyes starting to well up, "He'll be happy, the way he looks at you, I just know it."
"I'm not sure." you said, stealing yourself slightly as you dabbed away your tears with your sleeve, "He already has two children, he might be done."
Just as Rosie was about to say something the door opened.
"Oh hi Rosie, is everything okay?" said a worried-looking Toto, looking from you to Rosie and back again, clearly clocking the fact that you were both crying.
"Yes yes," she said, wiping away her own tears, "I just had some bad news and needed a shoulder to cry on."
Toto's face dropped, he was as fond of Rosie as you were, "Is there anything I can do?"
"No, it's okay, Y/N helped me out. Thank you though, you two are the best," Rosie said, dutifully lying on your behalf. She was selling her story and if you weren't so fraught with worry and in tears, you'd be impressed by her acting abilities.
"If you're sure," said Toto, still looking at you both suspiciously.
"Yep, I had better get going. I'll see you later," she said, getting up and squeezing your shoulder lightly.
"See you, Rosie. Let me know if I can help with anything else" you said quietly, not trusting your ability to hold back more tears. It was a flaw of yours that once you started crying you always found it hard to keep it together.
"Will do," she said, closing the door behind her.
"Is she okay?" asked Toto, sitting down beside you, before adding "Are you okay?"
"Yeah, all good, we sorted it. Just girl stuff, don't worry," you said, smiling weakly, leaning on his shoulder and sighing.
"Did George do something? Do I need to have a word?" he asked.
"No, no nothing like that!" you said, not wanting to raise further suspicion, "Rosie said she'd speak to him.
"Well I hope everything is okay with them," said Toto stoically.
"Yeah, just young love!" you said, snuggling closer, lost in your thoughts.
– – –
The morning passed without further incident, thankfully Rosie's larger uniform set fitting perfectly as you once again navigated the paddock during the Free Practice sessions. In an interesting turn of events, Christian Horner's PA had requested to set up a meeting that afternoon between the two warring Team Principals and you were intrigued why.
"Why would he want to meet with you one-on-one?" you asked Toto as you sat in his office post-Free Practice Two.
"I'm not sure and I don't like there not being a lawyer," said Toto, crossing his arms opposite you.
"Are you going to go?" you asked.
"I will see what he has to say," said Toto, frowning.
"Hmm, if it gets contentious just leave," you said, half concerned, half curious.
"Of course." said Toto, leaning across the desk towards you, "I'm so tired of this bullshit Y/N."
Surprised by Toto's admission, you retorted, "Are you talking to me as your Director of Communications or as your girlfriend?"
"Both." said the weary Austrian, "I don't know how much longer I can do this. I love the racing but the rest, it's like being in Kindergarten."
Your eyes sympathetic, you leaned forward, "You'll feel better after the break."
"I hope so." he said, "I'm excited for you to meet my family"
"This is definitely girlfriend territory," you said with a grin, "And I am too, I hope they like me."
"They will love you," said Toto, smiling widely, "Just like I do."
Melting under his chocolate brown gaze, you smiled back. Although you always promised each other to keep your work and personal lives separate, stolen moments like this were special.
"Well, I suppose I had better go and see what he has to say," said Toto with a sigh, getting up from his chair.
Following suit, you made your way out of Toto's office to return to your own, wishing Toto luck as he made his way down the stairs towards his rival's hospitality area. "Good luck, let me know what he says," you said.
"Will do, see you later," Toto replied, clearly a little apprehensive about his meeting.
– – –
Having been on tenterhooks waiting for Toto to return from his meeting you were increasingly anxious as the twenty-minute meeting dragged on for an hour, and then another. You had almost given up waiting and returned to the hotel when your phone buzzed.
Sorry we took a while, could you please come and join us? X
Surprised that Toto was inviting you to join, you hurriedly typed a reply and made your way towards your paddock neighbours.
Entering the Red Bull hospitality area you could feel the unfriendly looks directed towards you, you were in enemy territory and they made sure you knew it. Approaching the coffee station, you hedged your bets that their catering staff might be somewhat friendly.
"Hi," you said with a smile at the girl behind the counter.
"Oh hi, can I help you?" she said, a funny look on her face.
"Yes, I'm here to meet Christian Horner, where might I find him?" you asked, trying to stay polite.
She frowned, "But you're from Mercedes, no?"
"Yes, he's asked to see us, he's currently in a meeting with my boyf... colleague and asked for me to join." You couldn't believe the timing of your slip-up, so much for not mixing business and pleasure.
"Oh, so you're the one Toto Wolff is sleeping with!" she exclaimed rudely. "He's just upstairs, first door on the right."
Ruffled by her words, you decided to not dignify her with a response and made a beeline for the stairs before anybody else could add their witty remarks.
Taking a deep breath, you knocked on the first door on the right, apprehensive about what you were walking into.
"Come in." said a voice you recognised as Christian Horner.
Opening the door, you were surprised to see the two sworn enemies sitting opposite one another in armchairs, beers on the coffee table in front of them.
"Y/N, thank you for joining us, have a seat!" said Christian, standing up to greet you with a warm smile and a handshake before gesturing at the armchair beside Toto, "Can I get you a beer?"
"That's okay, thank you," you said, eyeing up Toto curiously. "Hey boss."
"Hi," he said somewhat awkwardly.
"You two lovebirds get a room..." said Christian, chuckling as he settled back down across from you, before noticing your thunderous glare and quickly adding, "Relax, I'm kidding."
"So what do I owe this pleasure?" you asked.
Christian shifted slightly, "So I have been telling Toto all of this but wanted to talk to you as well. I wanted to apologise for the pain my subordinate has caused you, it's not okay and I know that I like to rile up Toto every now and then but this season I took it too far, made it too personal and wanted to say sorry to you both."
Your eyes widened, this is certainly not what you had expected. Christian Horner apologising was like hell freezing over. "Wow, well there's a lot to unpack there," you said.
"I know, that's why we have the beers." said Christian, "Firstly, I want you to know that I have sacked the member of staff who worked with Toto's EA on the smear campaign. I am ashamed that someone under my leadership would sink so low and rest assured we will support you in any investigation or impending court case."
Stunned into silence, you turned to Toto, "Is this true?"
"Yes," he replied, "We've been discussing the finer details but I believe Christian when he says he didn't know what was going on."
Shrugging his shoulders, Christian continued, "Look, our car coupled with Max is good. We don't need to resort to dirty tricks to make you guys look bad. We can do it on track."
"There's the Christian we know and love," you said with a smile, making the two men chuckle.
"I have given Toto the member of staff in question's laptop and phone plus passwords to aid any investigation." he replied proudly, "I also want to say sorry for my behaviour at last week's press conference. I had no idea someone from my team was perpetuating rumours and I was just messing around. I know you both know about my relationship with Gina and I lashed out after Toto threatened me."
"Apology accepted," interjected Toto.
You were in shock. "Really?" you asked, whipping your head around towards your beau.
"Yes, life's too short." said Toto, "We have a plan. And this is why I wanted you here."
"I'm all ears," you said.
"We know this will not stay quiet, you of all people know what the paddock is like. So we were thinking the best approach is to make a joint statement." started Christian.
"Saying what?" you interjected sharply.
"Detailing everything that happened, it's a juicy story, the press will love it," he replied.
"And you agreed to this?" you asked Toto.
"I'd rather people know the truth," he said with a sigh.
"What do you need me for then?" you asked.
"Toto said you'd know how to handle this," said Christian expectantly.
"Well, this is not how I'd go about this but if it's what you want to do, let's go for it," you said.
"What would you do?" asked Toto.
"Let it blow over, forget it ever happened, this clears Christian's name more than it does yours," you said.
"Yes, but I also want to rise above it, and put an end to this silly rivalry," said Toto.
"Then let's do it," you said, with a smile.
– – –
Having spent far more time than intended in the Red Bull motorhome, you emerged in the paddock under the cloak of darkness. Probably for the best as the moment team rivals were seen liaising, the rumour mill always went whirring.
"That was interesting," you said to Toto, diving next door to collect your bags.
"I was surprised." mused Toto, holding the door open for you.
"I think he was scared you might retaliate," you said as you made your way up the stairs to your office.
"I agree," said Toto, following you into your office.
"Do you not need to get your stuff?" you asked.
"Yes, but first I wanted to do this," he said, taking a step forward to cup your face with his large hands and catch your lips in a soft yet passionate kiss.
"Toto," you started before he promptly followed up with a second, equally searing kiss.
"I have something I need to tell you," Toto said, shifting his weight nervously.
"What's wrong Toto?" you said, concerned by what he was about to say.
"Nothing is wrong. I just need to get this off my chest. Look, I'm old, and before you say anything, yes I am. I am too old to be running around the world like this."
"I'm not sure I like where this is going..." you said.
"I've been thinking about it for a while. I've achieved everything I ever dreamed of... and more... and it's time for someone else's turn. One more year and I'd like to retire, stay as an investor, maybe even an advisor, but less hands-on."
You were stunned, "So one more year, then retirement?"
"I understand if it means you don't want to tie yourself down to an old man," Toto said sadly.
"What planet are you on?" you said, looking him dead in the eyes, "Of course I want to be with you, whatever you do."
Toto's eyes lit up, "That makes me very happy. I have thought a lot about this and maybe it's a good thing, if you wanted... actually, never mind."
"What would I want?" you asked, curious where this was going.
All of a sudden Toto began to blush. "Forget it, we can talk again when we get there."
"Okay," you said, rolling your eyes. Sometimes Toto could be infuriating.
SATURDAY AM
You woke up early on Saturday morning, once again before Toto. Stretching, you made your way out to the balcony to get some fresh air. Thankfully the waves of nausea had seemingly stopped and you were feeling much better. You knew you had to tell Toto sooner rather than later but were not sure how to even broach the subject.
Your thoughts were interrupted by a phone ringing from inside the room and you dashed to pick it up before Toto woke up.
Seeing the caller ID, you picked up, keeping your voice low, "Hey Rosie, how's it going?"
"I'm okay thanks, just wanted to check in on you. Did you manage to speak to Toto?" she asked.
Checking he was still sound asleep, you settled on the sofa in the sitting area of the room, "No, not yet, I think it's best to wait until Monday, once the season is done and dusted. He doesn't need any more stress."
"Yeah you're right." said Rosie, "As long as you are okay though. Have you thought any more about what you want to do?"
You sighed, "As amazing as it would be, realistically, travelling around the world in such a demanding job with a baby is totally unrealistic."
"True." replied Rosie, "But what would Toto say?"
"Of course he's a stand-up guy but he's busy with the races, do you really think he'll want to be dealing with a newborn baby on race weekends?" you replied, looking up to see a shocked-looking Toto sat up in bed. "Is it okay if I call you back Rosie?"
"Sure, and don't stress!" she said.
As you gingerly ended the call you could barely look Toto in the eye, "How much of that conversation did you hear?"
"Enough to understand." he said, a serious look on his face, "What is she going to do?"
"What do you mean she?" you asked.
"Rosie, she's pregnant, no?" he said, getting up out of bed to join you on the sofa.
"Fuck." you said, "I didn't want you to find out this way but it's not Rosie, it's me. I'm pregnant Toto."
The blood drained out of Toto's face as he computed what you had just told him. "With me?"
"No, with Christian. What do you think?" you said, looking at him exasperatedly, "It was that one time in France, we weren't careful and work got so busy, I never got the pill. I'm so sorry Toto."
Toto rubbed his hands through his hair in exasperation as he processed the news, "This is a lot."
"I know, that's why I was waiting to tell you until after this weekend," you said, putting your arm around his wide shoulders. "I know it's a lot to take in, If you want we can talk about it on Monday, what we're going to do."
"Well, what do you want?" asked Toto, still looking shaken.
"I don't know honestly. I love you but this is so new. I hope one day to have children but I'm not sure. How would we juggle this with a baby?" you said with a sigh.
Toto suddenly looked more animated, "You want to have children?"
You sighed, staring into your lap, "Yes Toto, and I know we've never talked about it. I've been too scared. I know you already have been there, done that and probably don't want to do it again."
Toto stared at you intensely before answering, "What would make you think that? I love my children and I always regretted not having more."
Your mouth gaped open, was he really saying he wanted more children? "But what about us? This is new, is it not too soon?"
"Y/N, we've known each other for some time now. Yes we haven't been romantically involved for a long time but I know you well enough to know how much I admire you as a woman, as a human." said Toto, suddenly taking your hand in his, "I don't want to rush you as I know you have your career but one day I would like to have children with you."
"I feel the same way, Toto," you said firmly, turning to face him, "Are we seriously doing this?"
Toto's eyes lit up, "Only if you want to?"
"Of course I want to!" you said, grinning.
"Then let's do this." said Toto, looking happier than he had done in months before he turned to you and planted a kiss squarely on your lips before reaching out to rest his palm on your stomach, "I can't believe it, we're going to have a baby."
"The one time we weren't careful!" you said with a dry smile, placing your hand on Toto's. Although it wasn't ideal timing, you did feel lucky.
"Well, I am efficient in all my work," said Toto with a dry grin.
You playfully slapped his chest, "You are such a nerd."
"And now you're carrying my child." said Toto smugly, "You love nerds."
"I do love nerds." you said, "Big, old, Austrian nerds."
"Not too old!" said Toto, still looking pleased with himself. "You've made me the happiest man in all of Abu Dhabi."
Unable to stop smiling, you looked at him fondly, "You've made me happy too. I know we have a lot to talk about and work out but let's just enjoy this weekend and we can figure things out on Monday?"
"We can talk now, we have some time." said Toto, a serious air suddenly about him, "Logically, it makes sense for you to move in with me."
Your eyes widened, "You want me to move in with you?"
"Of course," said Toto, "If we are doing this, we're doing it properly."
You smiled, reaching up to kiss his cheek, "Let's do it then."
"I know this is the future but do you remember what I told you last night?" asked Toto.
"That you want to retire after next year?" you asked, unsure of where he was going with this.
"Yes," he said, "I was going to suggest that if children were in our future, I could be a stay-at-home Dad if you wanted to return to work. I've had my time, it's time for yours." he looked down before adding shyly, "Only if you want of course."
Shocked by this admission, you took a moment to find the words, "You'd already thought about kids?"
"Do you remember when Bono brought his children into the garage back in Silverstone?" Toto asked.
"Yes, why?" you said.
"I saw how you were with them and thought you'd make an excellent mother. Then my mind wandered, and I started to think about what if we had children together." Toto looked slightly embarrassed by his admission.
"That's what you were going to say? Jesus Toto. I thought you were going to break up with me." you said, having been confused by his tone the previous night.
"No, quite the opposite actually," he said, his cheeks reddening. "Maybe this is a sign."
You looked at him puzzled, "A sign for what?"
"Let's wait and see," he said with a wink,
SATURDAY PM
Now at the trackside motorhome, nervously watching the last quali of the season you took a moment to reflect on the conversation you'd had with Toto that morning. You'd been reticent to tell him your news but now that it was out in the open you felt as if a weight had been lifted off of your shoulders. You never could have dreamt how well Toto took the news and the fact that he had been considering the prospect of a future with you filled you with good vibes.
A knock on your office door interrupted your train of thoughts.
"Come in," you called out before the door opened to reveal Rosie.
"Hey Y/N, is now a good time?" she asked, pausing in the doorframe.
"Of course," you said, smiling widely. You hadn't had time to catch up with Rosie since telling Toto and you were once again glad you had a confident.
Closing the door behind her, Rosie took a seat on the small sofa across from your desk. "Was everything okay this morning?"
"Yes," you said, "But Toto overheard our conversation..."
Rosie went white. "Fuck, and what did he say?"
You chuckled, "Well first of all he thought it was you and George and threatened to come and sort George out."
Rosie giggled nervously, "Of course he did. Did you tell him it was you?"
"Yes," you said with a smile, "And he's happy."
Rosie's face finally dropped into a wide grin, "I knew he would be! I'm so happy for you both!"
"Thank you." you said, "Obviously we're keeping it quiet for now as it is still early days."
"Of course." she said, "Do you know if it's a boy or a girl yet?"
"No," you said, "We can find out at the next scan or we can have a surprise."
"Ooh." she said, "What are you thinking?"
"Not sure yet, I kind of like the idea of a surprise," you said with a small grin. "Toto already has one of each so either way we'll be happy."
"Aw this baby is going to be beautiful." said Rosie, "I'm so excited."
"Well I hope they get Toto's height." you said, "Especially if he's a little boy!"
"I think it's a girl," said Rosie, crossing her arms confidently.
"Do you?" you said, "I think it's a boy."
"Interesting." she replied, raising her eyebrow, "I'm normally good at guessing and I just think you look more like you're having a girl."
"Scientific." you said with a laugh, flicking your eyes back to the screen where you were watching quali, "We'd better get down to the garage, Q2 is getting underway."
– – –
Standing in the garage, headphones on, eyes locked on the small screen with a plethora of graphs and data, you glanced at Toto out of the corner of your eye. He hadn't stopped smiling all day and quali was adding to his good mood. Lewis and George had both made it through to Q3 and Mercedes was on track for a front-row lockout as long as Max Verstappen didn't put in a last-minute unbeatable time.
As the clock ticked down, you dared hope that he wouldn't, but in typical Max style, the Dutch driver managed to find almost a second where no one else could and pipped Lewis to the post for P1. Applauding your team's efforts, you looked at Toto who was beside you, continuing to grin. Noticing you looking, he stretched an arm out towards you, scooping you towards him for a celebratory half-hug before remembering that cameras were everywhere and then doing the same to a less enthusiastic Bono.
"P2 and P3, we are on for a podium tomorrow," he said clapping his hands together as he addressed the team, "Well done everyone and thank you. One last push."
SUNDAY AM
Waking up bright and early, the sun flaring through the curtains you couldn't believe it was the last race of the season. Toto's arms were wrapped around you protectively and knowing that he had a vice-like grip while sleeping, you had no choice but to snuggle in further. As your alarm sounded you felt Toto stir, clutching you ever closer.
"Good morning," he said groggily as he pressed a kiss to your temple before stretching his long arm across you to turn off the alarm.
"Morning," you said, smiling at his sleep-rumpled hair.
"Why are you looking at me like that?" he said, half asleep, one eye still closed.
"No reason," you said, kissing his neck in the spot you knew he loved.
"I don't trust you," he said smirking, before reaching his free arm around to caress your stomach. "I still can't believe it."
"Me neither." you sighed, "Not what I thought would happen when I first met you."
Toto quirked an eyebrow, "What did you think would happen?"
"When you walked in on me changing...hmm let me think, that you were some old perv?" you replied teasingly.
Blushing slightly, Toto chuckled, "Not my finest hour admittedly. But I still managed to woo you, now look at us."
You laughed, "Yep, irresistible charm."
"I knew it." replied Toto with a smile, "As soon as I saw you I thought to myself, she's the one."
"And all it took was a seethrough bra?" you said laughing.
"I actually thought you had lovely eyes," said Toto, deadpan before bursting into laughter and squeezing your hip.
"Sure sure," you said, cuddling up. "Toto?"
"Yes," he said burying his face in the crook of your neck.
"Logically speaking, what are we going to do?"
"What do you mean?" he replied, muffled against your hair.
"Realistically I am going to be out of action for a bit. It's not ideal timing. I'll have to stop working halfway through next season."
"Shhh." said Toto, rocking his hips gently into you, "We'll plan on Monday. For now, let me enjoy this moment."
Slightly worried at Toto's uncharacteristic laissez-faire attitude, you shrugged, "Sure, but don't moan at me when I'm giving birth in the paddock."
Toto laughed, "You're so dramatic!"
"Says you!" you laughed.
"I didn't think about the timing." said Toto, pausing before adding, "We will work it out. Don't worry, trust me"
"Trusting you is what got me into this mess Mr Wolff," you said playfully.
"It takes two to tango," replied Toto, hugging you tighter, his large hand still palming your stomach gently, "Right, we need to get out of bed, but I don't want to."
"Me neither," you said, burying yourself further under the covers.
Kissing you once more on the forehead, Toto eased to sitting up before extracting himself from the tangled mess and making his way over the background. "Team orders, get out of bed."
Laughing, you resurfaced, "Just one of the many perks of sleeping with the boss."
Toto peered around the door and quirked an eyebrow, "You weren't complaining last night."
Rolling your eyes you sat up, "Toto..."
Looking mischievous he retorted, "You know I was thinking, since it's the last race of the season, would you like to make a bet?"
Folding your arms, you replied, "Depends what the wager is."
"If Lewis wins, I get to name the baby."
"So if George wins, I get to pick huh?" you asked, not sure where this was going.
"Exactly. I have some great ideas already," said Toto, still hanging around the doorframe.
"And what might those be?" you asked.
"Paul. After Paul Ricard," he said, hardly able to contain his giggles.
"You are such an idiot," you said, getting up out of bed gingerly, making your way towards him.
"It makes sense, hear me out. It's where it all started," he said, grabbing your hip and pulling you in close.
"Absolutely not. What if she's a girl?"
"Paula," he said flatly before bursting out laughing. "Okay, how about this, Niki?"
Shaking your head you kissed Toto on the cheek before breaking his grip to make your way into the bathroom and get ready for the day.
SUNDAY PM
Halfway through the race disaster had struck in your rival's camp. Red Bull had had issues undoing one of Max Verstappen's wheels, leaving them with an abnormally long pitstop. It didn't give Mercedes a huge edge but fortunately, he was released into grid traffic and it was enough to halt his return to the front of the grid. It was now Lap 56 of 58 and Lewis was in the lead, George not far behind.
The Mercedes garage was silent, knowing that the team had a real last-minute chance of snatching back the Constructors Championship, something that had narrowly evaded you all season. You could hardly breathe as the lap count went down. 57, 58, Max Verstappen struggling to make it back up the field.
After what felt like an eternity, the chequered flag was being waved. Lewis was P1 and George P2. The garage erupted into cheers, Toto grabbing you suddenly and kissing you as if his life depended on it, oblivious to the hundreds of cameras trained on him.
Breaking the kiss, you could feel eyes on you. Blushing, you saw the team around you looking half horrified, half amused by the sudden public display of affection.
Leaning in to hug Bono, he had a twinkle in his eye, quipping "He better not try that with me."
Laughing you hugged him tightly, before retorting "Oh, I'll be having words with him later, don't worry."
Surrounded by your colleagues you lost track of the amount of people you hugged and kissed in celebration, all the while beaming at your increasingly animated beau. Toto was an emotional man and you could read him better than anyone else. You knew the Constructors Trophy meant the world to him and you hoped that he'd let loose later that evening.
LATER THAT EVENING
Sat at a low table, surrounded by your close colleagues you couldn't help but laugh at your thought train earlier. Toto had proceeded to let loose and then some, crowd surfing, drenching himself and everyone around him in champagne before belting out increasingly horrendous renditions of songs he barely knew the words to.
Smiling and glancing over to Toto lighting up the dancefloor, you sipped contently on your lemon water. It had been a truly wild ride of a year, with some serious ups and serious downs. One thing for certain was that you had fallen well and truly for the man before you.
Beside you, Rosie was looking less fondly at her other half. "What is wrong with him?" she said, gesturing across at George who was separate from the crowd and spinning around with his arms outstretched, not a care in the world.
"Aw, let him be," said Bella, "He looks happy."
"I suppose." said Rosie, sighing, "I can't believe even Toto is so far gone."
"I can believe." you said, laughing, "It's been a tough year, he needed this."
"Well it can't have been easy for you either, I'm surprised you're not dancing up there with him," said Bella.
Rosie shot you a knowing glance, well aware that she was the only person besides Toto who knew the reason why you weren't celebrating with drinks.
"Ah, no, I can't do it in this heat," you said, hoping she'd buy it.
"I know what you mean..." said Bella, fortunately not questioning you any further as a very drunk Lewis Hamilton came sidling up to your table.
"Y/N, come dance!" he said, holding out a hand as an invite.
"I'm not sure I'm very good!" you protested with a sigh.
"C'mon," he said, "Toto is missing you."
Shaking your head you eased up from the low sofa, making sure to conceal your very slight bump with a well-placed arm.
Grabbing Lewis' hand, you followed him through the throng of merry Mercedes team members to the centre of the dancefloor.
As you bumped along to the music, allowing Lewis to spin you around, you caught Toto out of the corner of your eye. He shot you a smile before mouthing "Are you feeling okay?"
You felt a rush of affection for him as even in his inebriated state he wanted to take care of you. Mouthing back "All good," you continued to dance with Lewis, content to bop along.
"So. Can I be Godfather?" asked Lewis, sidling up to you and whispering in your ear, just loud enough for you to hear over the pumping music.
Your eyes widened, he clearly wasn't as drunk as you'd surmised, "How did you know?"
"You're not drinking, Toto kept putting his hand on your stomach earlier and he keeps looking over to check on you every five seconds." said Lewis, "And that doesn't answer my question."
"Please don't tell anyone," you said. "And maybe. If you're nice to me, and to Toto!"
Crinkling his eyes in a smile, Lewis scooped you into a bear hug, "I'm so happy for you both. This is beautiful man."
EPILOGUE - TWO YEARS LATER
And beautiful it was. Having wrapped the eventful season your relationship with Toto had gone from strength to strength as you prepared for the birth of your baby. You'd met Toto's family, including his children, something you had been incredibly nervous about. Fortunately, they had welcomed you with open arms and were eager to meet their new baby brother or sister.
In turn, Toto had met your family, and although apprehensive at first due to the age gap, it hadn't taken long for him to win them over. Although life hadn't exactly gone as you'd planned, everything had quickly fallen into place.
Two years on from that fateful season you were living in Monaco with Toto and your toddler daughter, Sunny. The baby name debate had raged on but eventually, you'd settled on the unusual moniker, chosen as a nod to the city where you'd first met, Miami.
Time had well and truly flown by and some days you could hardly believe it. You continued to work with the team, in your role that you now shared with Rosie, meaning that you only travelled to half the races. Toto had also taken a step back, passing over some of his Team Principal duties to Senior members of the team, allowing him to focus on the business side of things.
As promised to the board on those fateful calls where you had to fight for your job, you'd brought on more ethical sponsors, brought more money and all-in-all improved the team for the better. Robert still continued to grumble but was always quickly silenced by numbers and statistics.
Your latest project was planning a farewell to the man who everyone knew would be going down in history as the greatest of all time. Lewis. Not an easy feat, he had fortunately entrusted you with his intent to retire before anyone else so you'd had plenty of time to plan. Over the years he had become a close friend and you wanted to do him justice. Now a nine-time WDC, Lewis was retiring to start a family of his own, something you knew he would excel at. True to your word, you and Toto had asked him to be Sunny's Godfather, a task that he relished.
Rosie and George had also taken their relationship to the next level, getting engaged and due to marry the following year, it was heartwarming to know that another couple had found love in the paddock. Controversially, you and Toto had not yet tied the knot, purely down to the fact that you hadn't had time. Toto had proposed not long before Sunny's birth, getting down on one knee with one of the most dazzling diamond rings you had ever seen.
Snapping back to the present, you shook yourself out of your thoughts as you saw Toto coming into the room, Sunny under his arm babbling.
"How about at the end of August?" Toto asked.
"For what?" you asked, not sure what he was talking about.
"For the wedding," he said, plopping down on the sofa beside you, seating Sunny on his lap.
"Mama!" the curly-haired toddler called out, stretching her tiny arms towards you. You knew you were biased but she was one of the cutest children you'd ever seen. Chocolate button eyes and dark brown curls, she was blessed with her Father's dimples and your olive complexion, a lethal combination.
"Here mi amor," you said, scooching her across for a snuggle, before nodding "August could work. But there is one issue"
Toto looked concerned, "What's wrong?"
You broke into a wide smile, "I'm pregnant Toto."
Toto's brown eyes widened, "Again? Already?"
You laughed, Sunny giggling along with you, "Yep. Old man strikes again."
Toto smiled, leaning across and putting his arm around you, "How did I get so lucky?"
"Papa!" said Sunny, this time reaching up for her Dad.
"Ooh, I think she wants her Daddy again." you said, "It kills me that you're her favourite."
Taking the tiny girl in his arms, Toto smiled, "I don't think so somehow."
"I know so," you said, looking at how your daughter gazed adoringly at Toto, their brown eyes identical. Glowing with pride at your beautiful family you patted your stomach tenderly, impatient to meet the new addition.
Sharing your thoughts, Toto beamed at you, "Do you remember the bet we made in Abu Dhabi two years ago?"
"Huh?" you said, not remembering.
"We agreed that if Lewis won the race, I could name the baby Paul or Niki," he said with a grin, playing with the bouncing toddler on his lap.
"I do not remember this." you said, "Was I asleep?"
"No, wide awake." he said laughing, "Lewis won though and I want to know if I can cash my reward in on this one."
"You are ridiculous," you said with a fond smile, "I'll think about it."
"You know you love it." he said, kissing you gently, "So maybe a Winter wedding then?"
"Sounds like a plan," you replied, your heart full of love.