Who I saw in front of me was not Freyja. It was a husk; a shell of a female once so bright. I'd seen hints of a broken piece of her several times in the last months, but this- this was nothing I'd seen before.
I'd kill them all.
The female clinging to Tamlin's arm did not hold him out of adoration or love. No, she clung to him for stability. She wouldn't be standing if his arm did not hold her. The breath that left me hurt like none I'd ever felt. Her eyes didn't meet mine, they skipped over me and Rhys before falling back to the floor.
Her hair was wet and flat to her head, stringy pieces sticking to the hollows of her cheeks. She held no color to her skin, her lips, her eyes. The dress she wore, one I'd seen on her before, hung like it was not meant for her. I knew Odessa had made that dress perfectly fit for her body, but not this body.
"It has been two weeks," Rhysand seethed beside me, the creature looming beneath his skin threatening to explode. Cassian stiffened, widening his stance as though readying himself to stop us.
"I understand," Tamlin spoke, though his words came out as though it pained him to speak. I wanted to slaughter him, though I could see how much it disturbed him that Freyja was in this state. Judging by the bruises and cuts on his face, he did not have a choice in this.
Tamlin moved then, urging Freyja to the settee. A sound rumbled in my chest at the tremor in the skirt of her gown as if she could hardly walk. I couldn't stop myself. Cassian didn't see me as I let the shadows swallow me and I stepped through their realm and to the seat. Freyja's gasp was rattling as I caught her other arm. Oh, Gods, her bones felt brittle. Tamlin stiffened again.
"Unhand my bride," he spoke through gritted teeth, but I could hear the shake in his voice. He stood no chance against me. My eyes shot to him as a snarl tore through me.
"You have yet to marry her, Tamlin. I will help her sit if I wish," I spat.
"Azriel," Cassian boomed from behind me. His voice held a command I refused to listen to. Not while Freyja's entire body shook as her knees bent. She collapsed onto the settee, chest rising in a heavy breath.
"Have you been giving her food? Water? Cauldron, she's dehydrated and malnourished," I ground out. Tamlin swallowed hard as he slowly sat beside her. I didn't miss the way she flinched as his hand looped around her waist.
"We've been providing Freyja with all necessary sustenance. She has... She has denied all offers."
My eyes snapped to Freyja. I looked her over, her hands folded in her lap and eyes cast to her skirt. Why wouldn't she look at me? I wanted to grab her face and force those blue eyes on mine. She'd given up. I saw that now, she gave up on herself, on me, on us.
"Azriel," Cassian spat again. I looked over my shoulder, ready to scream at him to leave me alone with her, but I saw the look in his eyes. He'd moved in front of Rhysand, his eyes wide and focused on me. Rhys was feeding off my emotions, building up his own rage and concern. I let out a slow breath, falling back a step.
Odessa was waiting. It was only a matter of time.
I couldn't look at her again. As I stepped back to my brothers, my entire body vibrated with the need to hold her, to protect her. Seeing Tamlin's hand resting on her hip, pulling her body into his side, I wanted to rage. I wanted to tear his limbs off, to shred his fucking skin.
"Please, sit," Tamlin croaked. His fear was apparent and it made me smile. The way his eyes flickered to my face as Cassian forced Rhysand onto the opposite chaise, I knew it was more of a baring of my teeth than a grin.
Cassian sat beside Rhys, leaning forward as his eyes locked on Freyja. I could see the concern and pity flowing from him. It took every ounce of my strength to sit beside my brother and not launch myself at Tamlin or Freyja.
Tamlin cleared his throat and turned his head to the large doors. "Drinks and food, please!"
Upon his request, servants scurried into the room with trays of small sandwiches, glasses of wine and whiskey, and several different fruits and sliced meats. My jaw clenched as I watched Freyja's eyes lift to the wine, pink tongue darting over her dry lips. Her fingers twitched, chest rose and fell. Her eyes didn't even look to the food.
"Freyja, eat," Rhysand barked out. I knew he didn't mean to order her so roughly, but Freyja flinched all the same and I wanted to strangle my brother for that. Tamlin's head bobbed and then turned in, his mouth brushing her wet hair.
"Have a taste, please. If not for me, then for them," he whispered. My tongue ran over my teeth as my shadows crawled across the floor, around the settee, and up behind them. I'd give them that freedom to linger, even if to let me hear what he tried to hide.
"I am not hungry," Freyja whispered back. Her voice broke me. It was rasped and hoarse, as if she hadn't spoken since the last time we saw her.
"Please," Tamlin pleaded. Though his voice was begging, I saw his fingers curl into her hip. Freyja inhaled sharply, her hands twitching.
"Tamlin, it would be kind of you to ready a plate for your bride-to-be," I told him through a cage of teeth. His eyes lifted to mine in a shock. He nodded quickly, blonde hair falling over his cheeks as he slipped his arm from Freyja and leaned forward.
Freyja slumped against the settee's backing, her eyes fluttering shut. Tamlin held a plate in front of her, packed with sliced fruits and meats and one cucumber sandwich. I nearly shouted at him to get her water, but the fool laid the plate in Freyja's lap and poured water into a thin glass from the decanter.
Beside me, my brothers stiffly drank from the whiskey, Cassian nibbling on dried meat. Thankfully, Freyja took the glass and sipped from it, small throat working on swallows.
"May I ask what brought up this visit?" Tamlin asked quietly, shifting on the cushion. Freyja just stared at her plate of food. From my angle, I saw the flick of her tongue on her lip and the heavy breaths she took. Eat, my love. Eat.
"You have my sister, I'd like to visit her from time to time," Rhysand sneered through gritted teeth. Tamlin's throat bobbed as he nodded, shoving a piece of sliced meat into his mouth as if it would clear the tension.
"Right."
Freyja inhaled sharply, lifting her head. Still, she avoided my eyes.
"I need to excuse myself," she whispered. Her hand shook as she moved her plate to the cushion beside her. My eyes narrowed, watching as she rose unsteadily and staggered out of the room. My eyes flicked to my brothers. Cassian was leaning forward on his knees, reaching out to grab his second glass of whiskey. Rhysand sipped his slowly, glaring at Tamlin, who still shoved food into his mouth.
I breathed in deeply, sending my shadows after the female I loved. She was sat at the staircase, servants scurrying around her. She was breathing heavily, a hand clutching the wooden railing.
I glanced at the males around me again. Despite the silence, they all were focused on something other than myself. It took little efforts to drench myself in shadows and follow to my love.
"Freyja." Speaking her name was an effort I'd never felt. It hurt to say, as if her sorrow fed into my own mind. Her eyes lifted, skipping over me before snapping back. Dull blue eyes surrounded in a whole different kind of shadows stared at me, chest rising and falling beneath the gathered fabric.
"Az," she whispered, squeezing her eyes shut. My name sounded like a plea. One I'd gladly answer.
I wanted to prepare her better. I wanted to talk to her and tell her the plan, but I saw my chance. Maids and servants were not in the vestibule. I dropped to my knee, my shadows swallowing her as I hoisted her into my arms. Freyja gasped, weak hands clutching at my neck. She didn't have the chance to question me before I stepped us through their realm.
A cool breeze touched our skin, making my Freyja cower into my chest. She whimpered, lifting her head to look at our surroundings. We stood on the porch of Odessa's home in Windhaven, the Lady sat inside awaiting our arrival.
"Azriel? Why..?" Her weak voice trailed off as her body trembled against the cold. I couldn't take it anymore. I lowered her bare feet to the snow swept porch. Still, Freyja curled into my body in search of warmth.
"Your mother is inside. I don't have much time, Freyja, but I'm stopping this. Look at you; I mean- I can't let you stay there. You and Odessa are going to fly to the other camps. You go one by one, stay a day at most, and I will meet you eventually. Do you understand? You do not linger, you fly until you can't anymore."
Freyja's teeth chattered as she shook her head against my chest. My brows pulled together, my arms snaking around her shoulders to hold her to me. Feeling her body against mine was the most right I'd felt in weeks.
"I can't fly. T-they clipped-"
My entire body went still. My eyes were snagged on the rough wood of the door as I processed what she said to me. They clipped. They fucking clipped her wings. What in the Gods did they need to clip her wings for? What had they done to force her to stay?
"Who?" I asked. I didn't recognize my voice. It was as foreign as any time I cornered the males in the camps.
"Emyr and Dafid. They cut my wings after-"
She cut herself off, shaking her head again. My hands snapped to the sides of her face, forcing her to look at me. She didn't have tears in her eyes, they were as vacant as they'd been in the manor.
"After what?" I spat.
"You don't want to know," she whispered, eyes dropping from mine. Oh, Gods. If I didn't have my Freyja in my arms, I would've went back there. I would've tracked them down and tore them apart. Instead, I dropped my mouth to Freyja's, savoring the taste of her before I left.
"Go inside, see your mother and tell her to carry you as far as she can. When she can't anymore, you run. Do you understand me?"
Freyja nodded, lip trembling. I kissed her again, quickly and painfully short. With that, I urged her to the door. Freyja hesitated, shuffling away from me. I knew she felt as I did, not wishing to lose this connection after so long. But she was smart and she left me there. I waited until she slipped into the house, until I heard Odessa's cries, and then I left.
I brought myself back to the foyer of the Spring Court manor. I'd pretend I used the bathing chamber if they noticed I'd left. Still drenched in shadow, I returned to the sitting room.
I should've known Rhysand was not that stupid, that he would've noticed my absence. Especially after he learned of Freyja and I. How he saw my shadows, I didn't know. The moment I stepped into the room, Rhysand's hand was around my throat and my back to the wall.
"Where is she?"