I stepped in front of the film lot. Well, this was... something. "You didn't tell me it was abandoned." I raised an eyebrow at Dad, who simply laughed. "I didn't tell the campers, either! Fun, huh?" I smiled, and shook my head. "Whatever. How about this? You get your looks done, and I'll wait up on the teenagers." He pointed finger-guns at me. "I was thinking the exact same thing."
I shrugged. "Go on. Your stylist's waiting for you." He ruffled my hair, and happily walked away. Now, I just had to wait for the stupid buses to get here. Thirty minutes isn't a long time. Is it?
[Time Skip - 20 Minutes]
Uh... 10 more minutes. This is boring, but it's what I signed up to do. I can't exactly just run off and do something else. I was just hanging out in the ticket booth where the gates were, checking the time on my phone every 30 seconds.
I heard the screeching of tyres, but brushed it off as some old vehicle passing by the lot. However, I did not expect to hear anyone's voice, especially that of Duncan's.
"Man, I miss the smell of the city." I raised an eyebrow, and turned my head. Oh, you're joking me! The bus came early?! I thought I had 10 minutes to go! He was followed by Leshawna and Harold, then Heather and Gwen, who got stuck at the doors together. They both grunted. "Ugh! Step off!" "No, you step off!"
They both growled at each other angrily, as they fell through the doors. Gwen crashed into Harold, which made him stumble, and drop his puzzle cube. He bumped into Leshawna and fell over. His cube then broke into tiny squares. Leshawna, however, did not budge. "Ow! Sorry, Leshawna..." She smiled down at him. "No harm done."
Everybody else got off the bus, and I decided I should probably check this out. I didn't know how many people came without saying anything, so I needed a head count. I stepped out of the booth, and had my back to the road. I groaned as I stretched, and then turned around.
I had, at that point, come to the realization that not a single one of these people had seen my arm. "Oh, wow. I knew it was going to be fake, but that's just obvious." I growled, and clenched my fists at Heather. "You wanna see what's really obvious?" Leshawna put a hand on my shoulder, which made me back off.
"Cool off, hun." "Whatever." Heather scoffed. "I am NOT hanging around here." I raised an eyebrow, and straightened myself. "Wait, what?" Leshawna seemed to be as confused as I was, too. "You're really gonna give up the chance for a million big ones?" I snickered, and pointed at Heather's wig. "That's a lot of good weaves~!" She seemed to be convinced by that. "Guess I can stay for a bit."
I was bored as heck. Dad usually came out a few minutes early. What was taking so long? Beth shrugged. "Face it. The money's the only reason we put up with Chris." I cleared my throat, and raised an eyebrow. She looked at me, slightly unsure as to what I meant. I rolled my eyes at her. She and Lindsay completely brushed my questions off, and chatted like 5-year olds. "You are totally looking the part of my new BFF! That's my new best French friend! I am SO moving to France when I win!" Beth grinned up at her. "My mom said my world would totally open up when I got my braces off! She was right! I'm going to France!"
I shook my head in denial. "I don't think that's what she meant..." Bridgette stood beside me. "Don't tell her that." I laughed mockingly. "Yeah, whatever." I felt someone touching me. I looked to my side to find Harold messing around with my arm. I pulled it away, and hit him across the back of the head. "Hey! Hands off the merchandise!" He scurried off, and I groaned to myself. Honestly. When will that nerd learn to keep his hands to himself?! Leshawna already rejected his sexual advances.
I don't want his gross hands touching something that mattered a lot to me. Especially this thing. No matter how interested he was. Dad pulled up with a tour car, that had many, many seats in the back. Duncan grinned. "Dude, it's about time!" Dad smiled, as I took a seat in the back. "Hop on, everyone! Come on, people! SHEESH! We haven't got all day! This cart's rented by the hour!"
I was sat beside Owen. He was obviously not comfortable next to me. I completely understood why. But, I noticed something. "Uh... Owen? Where's... Izzy?" His eyes widened, as he looked around. He turned his head behind us, to find she had not gotten on the car "Izzy! Run!" She whistled, completely ignoring him. I thought for a second. What's her call word, again...? Oh, that's right! She likes being called Kaleidoscope, or E-Scope! My mistake. I can totally do that for her.
"Kaleidoscope! Time to get going!" She then happily turned to us. "No one leaves E-Scope behind!" She pounded on her chest like a gorilla, whilst also yelling like Tarzan. She was surprisingly fast for someone who had only been eating hot dogs and marshmallows over the two weeks I was gone.
E-Scope stopped in her tracks, as she powered herself up. She then did a few front flips towards us, before landing directly next to me. Dad noticed the cameras were recording us, and quickly changed his persona. "Welcome to the set of Total... Drama... Action!" We passed a few empty warehouses, before slowing down in front of a camera. "This season's hottest reality show will be shot here, on an abandoned film lot."
I waved my hand. "Courtesy of Mary Parson." I huffed at the thought of her. After Courtney saw everything go down, she demanded Mom sign a contract that would make her fund this season. I have to say. Even though Courtney left me to die without an arm... she can be a good person at the best times.
Lindsay gasped. "Does this mean we're gonna be in the movies?!" I rolled my eyes at her incompetence. It was cute. Dad, on the other hand, wasn't so pleased. He growled, and got up in her face, repeatedly pointing at her. "No. It means you're gonna be on TV. And don't interrupt me! Ever!" She sheepishly grinned, and held her face. "Oops. Sorry."
Dad then started up the car again, and drove past several sets. One of them being a cowboy-theme. I sighed peacefully as I made a mental note of each one. "You'll be spending the next six weeks here, competing against each other in challenges, and for rewards. All for the chance to win some monster cash!" Owen looked around with a grin. "Yeah, baby! I'm gonna win me some moolah!" His yelling forced me out of my thoughts.
I frowned, but shook it off as both me and Dad shushed him at the same time. "Shush!" "Like last season, one team will win, and one team will watch one of their own make their way down the dreaded Walk of Shame, to the Lame-o-sine."
We passed the dirty old car, and I noticed my dad roll his windows up. The muffler on the limousine backfired, which sent a massive cloud of dust our way. Everyone but me coughed, and desperately tried to clear their throats as the gross smell of smoke filled the air. Trent anxiously looked towards Dad. "Couldn't you have spun for a better ride?" Dad simply frowned, and continued to look forward.
"No. I'm actually very offended by that. I'm letting Lewis take over." I raised an eyebrow, as I clicked my tongue. "A'ight. Let's do it." I pulled out a very messy script from my small bag that I carried around. I noticed Bridgette and Geoff making out right in front of me. I hesitated in disgust for a few seconds, before looking down. "Now, um... since we don't have an outhouse to dump your deepest, darkest secrets in..." Geoff and Bridgette suddenly stopped making out. "...You'll ditch the dirt, in our new and improved makeup confessional! In other words, a place I hated up until eight years ago." I muttered the last part under my breath.
/// Lindsay ///
"Oh my gosh. A whole trailer full of makeup?!" She looked around in excitement and admiration. A female intern approached with some lipstick, but Lindsay shook her head. "Oh, sorry. I don't use that brand."
/// End ///
I continued reading from the script. "To your left, is the Craft Services tent. Catered by Chef." Both me and Dad stopped in surprise as we heard metal and other stuff crashing and clanking around. Chef ran out, chasing a raccoon with a frying pan. I quietly laughed in surprise, as Lindsay stood up to take a photo. Dad, however, thought it would be hilarious to speed off while Lindsay was standing, so she fell over. "W-Whoa!"
I rolled my eyes, and decided to ditch the script. "If you survive Chef, which I very, very much doubt, considering our crowd of contestants... Ahem... You'll have to make it through our extremely dramatic awards ceremony. Here, all but one loser will receive a Gilded Chris award."
/// Gwen ///
"The Gilded Chris?" She raised her eyebrows in surprise. "Ha! That narcissist! Don't get me wrong. I still want one."
/// End ///
Geoff rolled his eyes. "We done now, dude?" Dad frowned at him. "I have an eject button. And, I'll use it." The switch-up was immediate. "Please. Continue!" We passed through a space-themed set, much to Harold's happiness. "Woah. Cool. Is this a dream?" I silently groaned, and sat back. E-Scope laughed, and punched both me and Owen in the arm for literally no reason.
"Ow- Hey! Uh- No. No, Harold. It is not. But, according to what I've seen, you may soon wish it was. A few months ago, this lot was home to a high-budget monster movie. Until the star began experiencing some.. um... ah, well... 'difficulties'...?" I quickly said whatever came to mind.
Lindsay gasped once more, and put a hand to her mouth. "Oh, no! Did she have, like, a mental breakdown?" I chuckled, and sighed. "Nah. No, uh... The star wasn't even a 'her'. It was an animatronic monster." As the cast looked around, they noticed massive bite marks in buildings, and stuff. Gwen anxiously turned her head towards me. "What happened to it...?"
/// Gwen ///
"In retrospect... I probably shouldn't have asked that question." She said with a small sigh.
/// End ///
Duncan chortled. "What? Is the animatronic monster you?" He pointed at me. "I mean... if you really think that's true, sure. But, I'm right here, so..." I shrugged calmly. He seemed to grow anxious of how chilled out I was being.
/// Lewis ///
"He must've noticed how defensive I got against Heather... But, still. No. I was not the thing that put those marks into those buildings." I shook my head, as I took another script from an intern. "Thanks, Mateo."
/// End ///
A loud monster roar echoed throughout the city, while everybody plugged their ears. I raised an eyebrow at Duncan. "Still think it's me?" He laughed nervously "C'mon, dudes. He's yankin' our chains!" My eyes darted downwards, then back up. I spoke in the most serious voice I could muster. "What chain?" His eyes widened, as a blush grew on his face. I looked to the side, bored, as the car screeched to a stop.
Trent and Geoff gasped as they watched the structure fall towards us. Obviously, DJ screamed like a girl. When the dust cleared, everyone peeked out of the car to gaze at the massive thing behind us. I pointed at it with my thumb. "Just to be clear... we don't have to pay for that, right?" Dad grinned. "You betcha! Since we're on a film lot, this season's challenges will be based on movie genres. Today's genre?" The monster roared loudly again, causing a large tremble.
/// Lewis ///
I chuckled, and shook my head. "Duncan's gonna wish it were me when he sees what made that noise."
/// End ///
"The monster movie!" He laughed, and held his stomach. "Duh..." I said with a subtle frown. But, that frown was quickly erased when I saw just how ginormous the monster was. It was replaced by a gasp from everybody, including me. But, Trent, Geoff, an DJ all had different reactions. "Woah." "Dude!" DJ's reaction being effeminate screaming.
"Uh- Yo- Uh..." DJ fainted, and fell out the car. I turned my head to Dad, who shrugged at me. I got out, and crouched beside him. I poked his arm a few times, before raising an eyebrow, and speaking, semi-surprised. "Huh. I guess he's down for the count!" Dad shrugged, completely ignoring the possibly dead contestant, as he got out of the car. "For your first challenge, everyone must get from here to the cast trailers, while our state-of-the-art monster prevents your every move." He chuckled, and pointed to a tent. "Chef has kindly offered to control the beast."
I looked over to see him wearing a motion capture suit, and stomping around as if he were the actual monster. I shook my head at Dad's antics, and giggled, knowing he accepted that deal completely unwillingly.
I then turned my head back to Dad. "And... action!" He threw his hands up into the air happily. Crickets chirped, as everyone stayed in the car, silently, not moving. I stood up. "That means go?" I shrugged, confused as to why they weren't reacting. Suddenly, there was a massive rush to exit the vehicle. There was also incoherent yelling, as everybody overlapped each other.
/// Geoff ///
"That totally reminded me of season 1, where, like, Lewis and I argued over Bunny. It was totally his fault the first one got, like, eaten, though." He spoke, shrugging.
/// End ///
/// Lewis ///
"That reminded me of when Geoff blamed me for losing Bunny. Uh, did I fail to mention that I nearly died in the process of saving him? He didn't even do anything! It was totally his fault." I shook my head, and crossed my arms, reminiscing of that moment.
/// End ///
Over all the yelling, I heard some voices. "Me first!" Trent grabbed Heather's shoulders, and pushed her behind him. "Out of my way!" Harold hit him in the neck, which made him fall over. "Hi-yah!" Duncan, however, overpowered Harold, and threw him directly to the back of the car. "Move it or lose it!" Harold yelled as he flew, while Dad sighed, and put a hand on his hip.
"This is going to be a loooonggg season..." I scoffed, and looked away. "I hear that. Do you want me to get started on the Aftermath show?" He raised his eyebrows in surprise. "This early?!" I dropped my arms in slight nervousness. "Well... I- I dunno. Never mind. I got eager to see some people." He softly smiled, and nodded. "Okay. It's up to you, okay?" I returned the smile. "Okay."
*
I observed from afar as several players really got into the theme of the movie. And, by 'afar', I meant on the back of the tour car. I was with Dad.
/// Lewis ///
"Dad told the people who had rented it that he had handed it in, but it was still with us. He lied, obviously. He can be really good at scamming people sometimes..." I put a finger to my chin.
/// End ///
He had his laptop open, and was working the cameras from there. They were all running across multiple sets, like the beach one, while the monster followed them around, each step causing a forceful tremor. I also noticed that every time the monster's foot landed in the sand, it made a massive dent in the shape of a dinosaur foot. "Now, THAT must've cost a lot." I said with a small laugh.
"Oh, it did. For your Mom!" He laughed, and I stayed silent for a second. I then joined in, nervously laughing. "Yeah! Y-Yeah..." I noticed DJ had started to wake up, so I helped him sit up. He wrapped his arms around his chest, and trembled. "I can almost hear your sweet lullabies, mama..." He began to suck his thumb, and I gently patted him on the head.
Dad began giggling out of nowhere. "Hey, hey! Check this out!" He pointed at his laptop. I raised an eyebrow, and walked over. Owen looked around anxiously, as E-Scope stood on a flat part of the beach with her hands on her hips. Suddenly, a shadow grew over her. It was the giant monster hand.
Owen gasped, and yelled in her direction. "Izzy, duck! Duck!" She giggled, and shrugged. "Goose!" Unfortunately, she did not react to the massive hand slamming down, and forcing her into the air. However, she did react to being in the air. "Wheeeeee!"
She landed in a construction lift, and was knocked out for a few seconds. She stood up, spread out her arms, and grinned. "Yeah! Haha! Do it again!" Hearing this, Owen slowly shook his head with a terrified expression on his face. However, the monster ignored him, and moved towards E-Scope. He grabbed her with both hands, and carried her over to a bouncy castle, where the losers were put until the end of the challenge.
He dropped her in, and she happily bounced around for a few seconds.
/// Owen ///
"Maybe the monster won't look for me in here... I love Izzy. Not like, 'love' love. But, I think that she's amazing. I just wish she'd notice me, and not that dumb monster. How can I compete with it?! Sure, we're both big, and- and we both eat a lot... But, it's really tall."
/// End ///
Dad raised an eyebrow. "Huh... I have a feeling the campers might die before they can reach the trailers." I crossed my arms. "Wanna make a bet?" He gasped dramatically, placing a hand on my chest. "Are you suggesting we bet on their very lives for money?!" It was silent for a second. "Obviously. How much?" I grinned at him. "Fifty bucks." He scoffed. "Child's play."
We shook on it, and both laughed.
/// Lewis ///
"Great! So, I'm getting fifty bucks if they survive, and he gets fifty bucks if they die."
/// End ///
My confidence was quickly switched to shock when I saw that Geoff and Bridgette were making out on a beach. "Dude! They're LITERALLY doing a challenge!" Dad laughed at my surprise, and ruffled my hair. "Cool it. It's funny!" I rolled my eyes with a small grin. "Whatever."
Gwen and Trent ran by, followed by Justin, and Beth, while Geoff and Bridgette continued to make out. Duncan ran, too, but skid to a stop. He turned his head to Geoff and Bridgette, eyes widened in surprise. "Um... I don't think this is the type of action Chris had in mind." He pointed at them, so the camera could see.
/// Bridgette ///
"What was I thinking? Duncan is so right. I like Geoff, but, hello? I also like a million bucks."
/// End ///
/// Geoff ///
"Duncan's right. It's time to get our heads in the game. Booyah!"
/// End ///
/// Confessional ///
[camera switches to both of them aggressively making out]
/// End ///
"Ew! Gross!" I said with a small laugh. Even Dad cringed at that one. "They're really getting into it! That's actually disgusting." I let down my shoulders a bit, as I relaxed. "Should we get to the trailers for the night? I doubt they'll get there anytime soon." Dad groaned. "Ugh, I know! But it's so far... Plus, we'll have to use the car, and I'll get sued if they find out I've been using it." I raised my eyebrow. "Who said anything about using the car?"
/// Lewis ///
"Alright, alright! Let me set the record straight! I won't be using my robotic arm to get around!" Short pause. I smirked. "Up until now."
/// End ///
We got there fast. A little help never hurt anyone, right? At least, it never hurt me. That's why it's called help. 'Cause it... helps... people?
/// Justin ///
"I'm not just another gorgeous face, and abs, and butt, and shoulders, okay? I'm also a master strategist. And this year, I'm in it to win it!" Justin explained, as he pointed at his several body parts.
/// End ///
- - -
We didn't even sleep in the trailers. We were too busy fawning over a luxury coffee machine in the trailer. "Okay. We're definitely taking this, right?" He eagerly asked me. I folded my arms. "Of course we are! They shouldn't have quality items like this." He laughed, and nodded. "Now you're getting it!"
Our conversation was interrupted by a loud bang outside. I looked to the door in confusion. "What on Earth-?" I hastily opened the door, to see one squashed trailer. And the campers were here, too. Dad stood behind me, checking what was going on. "Whoa. Am I ever glad I chose to wait in this trailer." He walked out past me, and stood in front of the campers. "It looks like you all made it. Guess I lose the bet..." He darted his eyes to me, while I smirked at him. He then continued. "That was just a warmup, anyway. Good news is, your next challenge is a reward."
All the contestants cheered, and seemed super happy. I looked away, as I stepped out of the trailer, too. "It will be the boys against the girls, with the winners getting the first pick of the trailers, where you'll be living for the next forty-two days! You will have your choice of Trailer A, or Trailer... yeesh." Dad shuddered at the sight of the destroyed trailer. "Off to the Craft Services Tent!"
Owen cheered by himself. "Aw, yeah, baby! I'm starving!"
/// Owen ///
"My mom says I eat when I'm upset. And happy. And tired. Not to mention bored, gassy, morose, joyous, comatose, semi-conscious, avuncular..." He laughed. "Avuncular."
/// End ///
We all stood in front of the giant buffet table. It was very long, like the ones rich people have. It was loaded to the brim with fancy foods, and drinks. Owen, once again, cheered. "Woohoo! This is awesome!" "Dude. This chow looks like something out of a commercial!" Lindsay gasped, intertwined her fingers, and brought them up to her face. "Ooh! Can I star?" I shrugged her off, and answered Geoff. "I mean, you're half-right." ...Much to his confusion.
"Let's get this speed-eating contest started!" He got on one knee, preparing to race off to eat. I watched in surprise. "On your marks... get set..." He raced towards the table. "Come to papa!" Dad raised his voice. "No, wait!" However, he was completely ignored. He faceplanted, as I chuckled at Owen.
He was really eating everything. He moved down the table, shoving everything into his mouth without even chewing it. Obviously, he skipped the lettuce, but ate the pineapple, for some strange reason. All I can say, really, is that he went all out. "Oh! Is this veal? It must be veal! I've never tasted anything like this!"
I snickered, and restrained myself from revealing it. I turned my head to see shocked expressions on all of the contestants' faces. Duncan shrugged at Leshawna, and even E-Scope was concerned.
[Time Skip - 5 Minutes]
After a good few minutes, Owen had cleared the table, and was drooling from how much he ate. I chuckled again, and walked over to him. "Owen, the man of many appetites! How was it?" He did not maintain eye contact with me at all. He was so drained that he was laying on the table. "The turkey was a bit... dry." He burped in the middle of his sentence.
I shrugged, and shook my head in disappointment. "Not surprising. Since, oh, well, y'know. The food was fake!" He widened his eyes in surprise. "Fake?!" I nodded with a small grin. "Yep. Just props. Made from foam core, silicone, sawdust, and wax. It wasn't a speed eating contest. It was a contest to find the key, dude." I stifled a laugh. Owen raised an eyebrow at me. "What key?" He burped up a small key, and it landed in his palm. "Oh, you mean this key."
I clicked my tongue, slightly startled. "That'd be the one...!" "Does this mean I win?!" He grinned up at me in excitement. I smiled back. "Yes. Yes, it does." He cheered, and got up onto his knees. "Alright!"
/// Duncan ///
He was laughing heartily, and leaning back in the chair with his arms crossed. "Did you see that?! The dude ate foam core, and wax! Full props for that, man!" He laughed again.
/// End ///
/// Geoff ///
He gestured a thumbs-up to the camera. "Way to find the key, dude!" He grinned. "I used to think Owen was just some party dude, but he's really a stand-up guy. Party on!"
/// End ///
/// Harold ///
He crossed his arms. "I could've done that, you know. I just wasn't hungry." He looked away in jealousy.
/// End ///
/// Owen ///
He raised a finger. "Oh, wait, wait, wait! There's still one more!" He burped again.
/// End ///
/// Leshawna ///
She sat with crossed arms. "Know what that boy has? Guts. Guts full of foam core, and rubber. But guts just the same."
/// End ///
/// Lewis ///
I shook my head. "Oh, jeez... I think I might need to man the infirmary again." I looked down at the phone in my hand. 'Wax poisoning'...
/// End ///
I poured a glass of water, and mixed some Dulcolax tablets in, hoping it would help Owen with his... uh... 'problem'. I approached him, while he groaned uncomfortably. "Ugh... O-Oh, don't worry. I'm cool. Haha... My mom says I've got a gut like a goat." His stomach then gurgled, and I could tell he was either going to:
A) Die.
Or...
B) Die painfully.
Neither of those options I was particularly happy with.
Owen groaned again. "Nope. Call 911." Dad approached the both of us, laughing. "You're gonna need it. Since you're the winner, you get first pick of the trailers." Half the contestants cheered, while the other 7 watched anxiously.
*
I began to get impatient. We had been standing here for a good thirty minutes. I was going insane. I tapped my foot, and put my hands on my hips. "We haven't got all day, Kingpin. Make a choice!" He had no idea who that was. He even took it as a compliment... "Um... I choose... the squashed one!" Every single boy except for him disagreed, and complained about it. He anxiously looked at them. "What? It has more character!"
The girls cheered, until the monster stepped on the normal one. It was then also destroyed in the process. "Aw..."
/// Kaleidoscope ///
"Ha! I am so over that monster." E-Scope crossed her arms.
/// End ///
Chef had finished fixing up the trailers. I remained beside the campers. I was tense, but I kept it under wraps. I had to remember my technique. "Okay, guys. Get a good night's sleep, cause Dad thought it was a good idea to set a seriously early wake-up call. Like, 6 AM. So... yeah."
/// Confessional ///
"I assume I'm staying with the boys, again?" I looked at Dad. He grinned innocently. "Yup!" I sighed, and faceplanted. "Great."
/// End ///
Harold raised his hand. "I'll take the top." Geoff nodded. "I call the bottom." The two of them walked to their preferred beds. Trent and Owen both pointed at their own beds. "Mine." They then both walked towards their beds. Duncan looked at me, and I looked up from my phone. "Oh, I'll take last pick. I really don't care." "You sure?" I raised an eyebrow at him. "Duncan, if I wasn't sure, do you think I'd be letting you, of all people decide before me?"
He stood silently for a second. "Good point. I'll take the bottom." He laid underneath Justin, and I got the empty bed underneath DJ. Harold got a singular bed, thank the stars. Duncan audibly got comfortable. "Oh, yeah, that's the stuff." Harold sighed, and Owen had already fallen asleep.
I overheard the girls arguing in their trailer, much to my annoyance. Why couldn't girls just, like, get along for one night?! And by 'girls', I mean Heather! Uh... I really can't be making comments on this. Especially in my current situation.
*
"Dude. They've literally been arguing for hours!" Geoff exclaimed, as he sat up. I groaned, and looked up from my book. "They're girls. They're annoying. Get used to it." I returned my gaze to my book. "Gosh, I hope Heather's going easy on Leshawna..." Harold's been all over Leshawna since the last season. He didn't understand that she wanted to stay friends. Trent nodded in agreement. "Yeah. This is only the first episode, and they're already neck-and-neck."
I rolled my eyes at him. "Well, some people, ahem, Heather, ahem, are just being mean for the sake of it. Stupid masochist..." I muttered those final two words under my breath.
I shut my book, put it under my pillow, and got comfortable in my bed.