Sunday 29th January 1978
"Moony?"
"Mmm?"
"It's after midday..."
"So?"
"Thought you might fancy getting up?"
"...no thanks."
"Can I come in?"
"...no."
"...ok, then." Sirius began to walk away, and Remus's stomach flipped.
"I'm sorry." He said, loud enough for Sirius to hear, and stop. Remus finally crawled out of the covers. "I do want you here, I just don't know what to say."
He could hear Sirius fidgeting, his hands in his pockets, then running through his hair. Finally,
"We don't have to talk?"
Remus sighed. He was a mess; he hadn't washed properly since Wednesday, and had only got out of bed to use the bathroom. The other boys had been feeding him by passing food through the crack in his curtains, and if they hadn't Remus wasn't sure if he'd have eaten at all. He was in the worst state he'd ever been in. But he missed Sirius.
"...ok then."
The curtains parted and Remus scowled against the bright daylight, but Sirius crawled in quickly, closing them again. He looked at Remus, but he didn't look too hard before shuffling down next to him and enveloping him in his arms.
"Thanks," he breathed against Remus's hair, "for letting me in."
"Reckon I must stink."
Sirius inhaled deeply, tickling Remus's forehead and making him squirm.
"Nope, just smell like Moony."
"Gerroff, mutt." Remus wriggled away from him.
"Feel like getting up soon? Everyone's worried. And they're looking at me now, like I know what to do, because everyone knows about us, which is weird, and quite a lot of pressure, really."
Remus chuckled, and it felt strange, but good. Still, he had a melancholic episode to maintain.
"I still don't feel like getting up."
"Ok, then you need to let me hide here with you, because I'm not going back out there."
" Sirius."
"Re mus." Sirius frowned at him, exaggerating his eyebrows to look stupid.
"Stop it." Remus folded his arms, aware he was starting to sound like a sulky child.
"I will not." Sirius poked him in the ribs, "Come on, I know you're feeling like shit about everything, but did you ever consider that it's not for you to hog all of the misery like this? That maybe if you talk to your friends it might not all seem quite so bleak?"
Remus frowned up at him, arms still crossed.
"Maybe that works for you..."
"Are you saying this is working for you?"
Remus pressed his lips together. They stared each other out for a minute. Remus began to think he'd quite like to fight Sirius right now, like they did on full moons; just because it was a fun way to expel energy. Then he noticed something. He sniffed the air.
"Are you bleeding? I can smell blood."
"Probably you, from the moon."
"No, I've healed already, I never have open wounds longer than a day."
"Bloody hell," Sirius laughed, lightly, "How is it possible for you to get any cooler?!"
"And it's your blood, I can tell."
"There you go again! You're basically a superhero."
" Sirius!"
"Ok, ok," he sat up, running his hands through his hair. "You swiped at me a few times over the moon, I told you that, we did it to each other. And you can't turn me when I'm a dog, we've tested that enough times."
"But you're still bleeding?! It was almost a week ago! You need to go to Madam Pomfrey!"
"Oh yeah, and say my werewolf boyfriend scratched me while I was in dog form as an illegal animagus?!"
"Jesus." Remus groaned, hauling himself up and out of bed, grabbing Sirius by the wrist and pulling him along.
"Where are we going?!"
"I need better light!"
He yanked open the bathroom door and slammed down the lid of the toilet. "Sit." He instructed. Sirius complied, half smiling.
Remus opened the little mirror cabinet above the sink, digging out murtlap essence and disinfectant and gauze and cotton balls. (He had found over years of trial and error that a combination of magical and muggle things worked best. As with almost everything else.) He pulled his wand out of his pyjama bottoms and stood in front of Sirius.
"Ok. Show me."
Sirius dropped his head, no longer enjoying Remus's newfound motivation. He sighed heavily and lifted his shirt, saying,
"It's not that bad..."
It wasn't as bad as Remus had feared, but it still made his stomach clench when he saw. Three dark red stripes, across Sirius's ribs. They were starting to heal, but he knew he could fix it fairly easily. He took a deep breath, met Sirius's eye, and then reached for the disinfectant. Then his wand. Remus was pretty good at healing cuts now, and the scab and the redness were gone in an instant. Now they were white stripes.
"I'm so sorry," he said, mournfully. "It was a magical wound. You'll have a scar there for the rest of your life, now."
Sirius looked down at the mark, then up again.
"That's fine, Remus." He said, quietly.
* * *
So, Remus rejoined the group, at Sirius's goading, and they were all kind enough to pretend he had merely been unwell, and not avoiding them. The news over the past few days had been particularly grim. First the Prophet had published a list of the dead, and their photographs. Then they had published a list of those 'presumed bitten', along with their photographs, which had provoked outcry among some of the more liberal commentators, and ignited a debate on mandatory registration for all werewolves.
Greyback's name had not been mentioned, nor any other werewolf that Remus was aware of. It was as if the horrific crimes simply happened one night, and the assailants had vanished into thin air. No one had heard from Marlene, either, though Danny McKinnon was one of those named in the papers.
He'd been given a full four inches of text, by virtue of his celebrity as beater for the Chudley Cannons. The team's manager was interviewed and quoted saying that while he had not yet been briefed on the details Danny's condition, the Cannons operated a 'zero-tolerance' policy to 'half-breeds and dangerous creatures', and would deal with any allegations of infection accordingly. James vowed that he would never see a Chudley Cannons game again, but Remus mostly felt sorry for Danny.
They tried to put all of this misery behind them, and went down for Sunday lunch (and thank goodness; it was generally Remus's favourite meal of the week, and he'd have been even more blue if he'd missed it), then spent the rest of the evening cosied up in the common room in front of the fire. Remus even acquiesced to a chess game with Peter, who was thrilled.
"You know what we ought to start getting serious about," Sirius mused, sorting through his record collection.
"NEWTs?" Remus asked, hopefully, as Peter captured his knight.
"Job applications?" Lily said, from the arm chair, where she sat in James's lap, reading a magazine.
"The quidditch cup?" James suggested.
"For goodness sake," Sirius tiutted, "I'm ashamed to call you all marauders."
"What?!" All three of them frowned, offended. Peter chuckled,
"He's talking about the big prank on Slytherin. You know, we started planning it before christmas."
"Wormy-boy, you are without a doubt my very favourite person." Sirius grinned broadly. Peter snorted,
"Bugger off," and promptly captured Remus's queen.
"Ugh. I don't know why I bother, haven't beaten you since I was thirteen." Remus sighed, leaning back on the rug on his elbows. He looked up at Sirius, "Well then? Got a plan?"
"Maybe. Whatever we do, I think we should focus the attack on the dungeons."
"Let's not throw around words like 'attack'," Lily said, hurriedly, "This is just a practical joke, right? In the wholesome spirit of harmless house rivalry?"
"If you like," Sirius shrugged, half ignoring the interjection. "Anyway, Moony, I thought your study group was in on this? What's the point in you having all these minions if you can't make them work for you?"
"Oh my god, for the last time, they are not my 'minions'!" Remus rolled his eyes. "Anyway, we've not had a proper study group yet this term. I've been ever so slightly busy."
"Well, as none of us are scheduled to be in mortal peril for the next month or so," Sirius replied, "I think we ought to get cracking. Everyone could do with a laugh, eh? Assemble the troops, we'll meet sometime next week."
"As long as it doesn't clash with quidditch," James yawned, "I'm there. Right, I'm off to bed, Transfiguration first thing."
The others all glanced up at the clock, or began to yawn themselves and agreed to follow suit. The common room was clearing out now, anyway, and they were some of the last to leave.
Remus had just got his pyjamas on and brushed his teeth, when he remembered that he'd left his book downstairs. While that didn't usually matter, this particular book was Maurice , by E.M. Forster, and though the cover was nondescript, he was a bit concerned that if someone picked it up and read the blurb there would be raised eyebrows.
Sighing, he left the bathroom and hurried downstairs, muttering, "Getting my book." to Sirius, who was next in the queue.
He had just grabbed the book and was about to head back up, when he heard the portrait hole slide open. He turned to see Mary enter. She was wearing a short, spangly silver dress, and she tripped on her way in, but caught herself and giggled.
"All right?" He called to her.
She looked up, squinting a bit in the dim light.
"Hiya, sexy," she grinned, wandering in a bit unsteady on her feet. Might have been the four inch heels she was wearing. Or it might have been the Witches Brew Remus could smell wafting off her.
"Hello, been somewhere?" He walked back towards the couches, wanting to make sure she was all right before leaving.
"Pfffff." She waved a hand, collapsing into the nearest armchair, spreading her legs out. Her short dress rode up her thighs, but she didn't seem bothered, "Just a few drinks in the Ravenclaw common room."
"Thought you were seeing a Hufflepuff?"
"Mm, he was there." She exhaled, smiling, tilted her head back and closed her eyes. The lids were painted gold, finely rimmed with kohl. She looked like an Egyptian queen in a party frock. "But a lot of people were there, I s'pose."
She sounded sad. Remus sat down in the armchair opposite her, clutching the book in his lap.
"Are you ok, Mary?"
"Oh. Fine." She opened her eyes, slowly, and smiled at him. She wasn't that drunk, he realised, but she looked tired, and deeply unhappy. "Just stuff on my mind. Boys being wankers. Poor Marlene."
"Have you heard from her?"
Mary shook her head, then sat up, blinking.
"Haven't got a fag, have you sweetheart? I don't usually, but I just really fancy one."
"Yeah," Remus reached in his pockets for his matchbox, where he kept the cigarettes he had rolled himself. He slid it open, "Normal or fun?"
"Oooh, fun, please," she purred, reaching over, "Might help me sleep."
"Um, about Marlene," Remus said, lighting his own, "I just had a thought, er... you know her friend Yaz? Have you seen her about? I wasn't sure if anyone told her--"
"I did." Mary said, exhaling, watching Remus through the smoke beneath her heavy golden eyelids. "I told her."
"Oh!" Remus blinked, surprised. "That's good, then."
"Mmm, I thought she had better know," Mary mused, pulling a strand of her hair and winding it coyly around her little finger. "Didn't want her to think Marls had gone cold on her."
Remus took a quick, sharp puff on his cigarette, frowning very slightly.
"What do you mean?"
Mary laughed, arching back in the chair, showing her pearly white teeth. She let the curl of hair spring back into place like a corkscrew.
"Oh come on, Remus," she shook her head, "I know. "
"You... she told you?"
"No," Mary conceded, settling back down with a sigh, "But I'm not thick, despite rumours to the contrary. At least, I know what romance looks like." She arched her eyebrow, "I'm not as dense as James, for example. How long did he take to figure it out?"
"He doesn't know about Marlene," Remus replied, "They must keep it quiet during quidditch stuff."
"I'm not talking about Marlene, now. I'm talking about you."
"Me?!"
"He's a good kisser, isn't he?" She winked at him. "But then, you were too, I seem to remember."
"How...?!"
"Mm, I've suspected for a little while now. Just little things. All the time you spend together. His being single for more than five minutes. I wasn't a hundred percent sure, but you've just confirmed it for me."
"Bugger."
She laughed again, a friendly, trilling sound.
"Silly boy." She smiled affectionately, playing with her hair again as she smoked. She looked at him again, her eyes more focussed. When she spoke, her voice was more serious than normal. "It's fine if you want to keep it quiet. I was going to wait, to see if you told me yourself - like I'm doing with Marls. But. I just wanted to let you know... I know I've got this reputation for being a bit of a big mouth, but I can keep a secret, ok? Especially for my friends. And if..." She bit her lip, "If there's anything else you're keeping secret, Remus, then you can trust me, ok? It doesn't change anything."
This was almost too many revelations for one evening. Remus sucked hard on his cigarette, and half wished he'd opted for a spliff too.
"What are you saying?" He asked, very carefully. "Do you think you know something... else?"
"Remus." She sat up. "The scars? Being ill every full moon? We do the same Care of Magical Creatures class."
"You can't tell anyone." Remus said, his voice very low, even though they were completely alone. "Please, Mary... me and Sirius, that's one thing, but this... I could get kicked out of school. I could get arrested!"
"Hey!" Mary stood up, quickly, and came over to sit on the arm of the chair, "I'm not going to tell! That's what I'm trying to explain." She wound an arm around his shoulder. "Makes no difference to me, I swear."
"Really?"
"Honestly." She kissed his cheek and gave him a squeeze. "So don't take what happened to Marlene's brother so hard, eh? It was nothing to do with you."
"She'd never forgive me, if she knew..." Remus said, sadly. Mary handed him what was left of the joint and he puffed on it gratefully.
"Don't worry about that," She said, flippantly, "She'll come around. She knows who you really are. And maybe you could help? You could write to Danny, even - I bet he could do with a friend."
"That's--" Remus was about to say that while it was a really nice idea, it was almost impossible, considering the fact that he was unregistered, and it would be a bad idea to draw attention to himself.
"Mooony, where are you?" Sirius's plaintive voice came clattering down the stairs, "I can smell the pot all the way from here, you're not being subtle-- oh! Hiya MacDonald."
"Black," Mary nodded, still perched on the arm of Remus's chair, "Sorry, I'm trying to seduce your boyfriend."
"Oh yeah, I'd like to see you -- wait, my what ?!"
She just poked out her tongue at him. He looked at Remus, "Are we just telling everyone, now?!"
"Oi!" Mary hopped off the seat, "I'm not 'everyone'! Arrogant tosser. Don't forget I had you both first."
Remus couldn't help laughing at the look on Sirius's face, and got out of the chair, sheepishly, still clutching Maurice ,
"Sorry, I'll come up now, we were just chatting." He looked back at Mary, "Will you be ok?"
"Fine," She nodded, smiling, "I'm off to bed too. Night lads!"
"Good night!"
Back upstairs in the warm glow of their dorm room, Peter was already snoring softly behind his curtains, and James was sitting cross legged on his bed, flipping through his quidditch notebook.
"Thought we'd lost you, Moony," he whispered, cheerily, as the two boys entered.
"Bumped into Mary, she's been at some party with the Ravenclaws."
"See, this is what happens when you get stuck with the Head Boy and the Head Girl in your house," Sirius sighed, leaning back on his own bed, "All the fun happens elsewhere."
"Oh, stop whinging," James grinned, closing his book, "We'll have more parties and you know it. Now go to bed like a good boy."
"Fine," Sirius yawned, falling backwards dramatically, so that he disappeared through the heavy velvet hangings.
"G'night then," Remus started, making for his own bed, but Sirius's hand shot out and grabbed his wrist.
"Moony..." he whispered, softly, from the shadows behind the veil. Remus bit his lip and glanced over at James, who looked away, awkwardly, and began to draw his own bed curtains across. Oh well. Fuck it.
"Mmm... ok..." Remus let Sirius pull him inside.