You think I'm a lame duck
But I don't give a blue fuck
So you leave me like crazy
Drive me to be lazy.
I love you, you big dummy!
I love you you big dummy!
Monday 13th February 1978
"You know," Lily yawned, "Other boyfriends might take the night before Valentine's day to plan something nice for their girlfriends, rather than an assault on other students."
"Thought we were calling it a practical joke, Evans," Sirius winked. "Anyway, how do you know what other boys are doing? We're the only boys you know, and we're doing this."
"Touchè." Lily poked her tongue out at him from where she sat cross legged on James's bed.
"And," James said, sitting on the floor beside Remus, folding envelopes as fast as Remus could stuff them, "How do you know I haven't already planned something nice?!"
"When do you have the time?" She shrugged, "Whenever you're not with me you're playing quidditch."
"I can multi-task," he said, haughtily, a mischievous twinkle in his eye.
Remus gave James a sideways glance. He couldn't account for any of James's free time either, but it was best never to underestimate James Potter.
"How about you, Pete?" Mary asked, sitting on James's other side, neatly stacking the envelopes he handed her and ticking names off the list, "Big plans for tomorrow?"
"Nope." Peter replied, glumly. He was lying on his stomach on his bed, frantically completing the Charms notes due for the next day. He'd dropped a few hints to Remus about copying them, but Remus had pretended not to understand and eventually poor Wormtail had dropped it and just resigned himself to doing a poor job.
"What about Dorcas?" Mary pressed.
"Dumped me."
"Aw, poor love." She cooed, "At least I won't be the only single one."
"Really?" Pete looked up, hopefully.
"Yep, dumped that stupid Hufflepuff." Mary nodded, bent over her work.
"Oh well, if you fancied dinner, maybe..." Peter started. Mary shook her head,
"Oh no, sorry Pete, I'm triple booked as it is; it'll be a miracle if none of them bump into each other."
"Oh." Peter returned to his homework, looking even more depressed than before. Lily stifled a giggle, but Mary seemed oblivious.
"Cheer up Pete, we still love you." Remus offered, stuffing his very last envelope and handing it to James. "Me and Padfoot'll have dinner with you."
"So basically exactly the same as every other night of the year." Sirius teased.
"You two not doing anything, then?" Mary asked, casually. It felt like a loaded question, all the same, and Remus found it hard to ignore the glances his friends were now shooting at each other. He looked up at Sirius and said, very firmly,
"Don't even think about it."
Sirius's face cracked into a smile,
"I think Valentine's Day is Moony's idea of hell."
"Exactly." Remus nodded, solemnly. Let the girls have flowers and hearts. He had plenty else going on, thank you very much.
"Aww, I think that's a shame," Mary said, crossing the last name off her list and stretching her legs out on the rug, lying back on her elbows. "Valentine's Day can be nice, if you do it right."
