TEN.
"Lad, you need to calm down." Although his words were deceptively comforting, Ciarán's annoyed tone glared through each syllable he spoke to his best friend. "What's the big worry about this, anyway?"
"I don't know, Ci. I just-" Andrew whipped his hands around in the air, speaking in a low tone although Ivy and Gwen's excited conversation about Disney movies in the corner was enough to cover the boys chatter. "It's been really important to her. I thought tonight should be special but i've been so caught up with the damn tour starting tomorrow I feel like I'm losing my fuckin' mind."
"Special?" Ciarán questioned, leaning against the wall by Vivienne's empty drum set and crossing his legs in front of him. He watched with narrowed eyes as his best friend walked himself in circles.
"She took me to her favorite ramen place. And then taught me to play billiards- And last week she took me to a night aquarium!" Andrew bit the inside of his cheek as his words were getting a bit too loud, his lower shift in tone cued by Ciarán's eyebrows jumping up. "I feel like i'm falling behind, she's got every idea out there and I took her to a pottery shop where she made a giant dick out of hot pink clay."
Ciarán stifled his laugh. "It sounds like she's enjoying the dumb shit you do."
"Feels like you're not taking this serious." Andrew stopped his pacing, his hands rubbing together nervously.
"Feels like you're taking this way too fucking serious, mate." Ciarán couldn't help but chuckle through his words at seeing his friend's erratic behavior. Through 2 decades together he'd never seen him so worked up about something so simple. "You ever thought that maybe she actually likes your stupid activities?"
"Not funny, Ci."
"I'm being serious!" Ciarán justified, a hand pressed over his heart. "She comes into rehearsals the day after your nights out with a smile on her face— and she nearly never smiles. She's obviously happy with what you're doing and you're stumbling around here like a fool talking g about how she's going to hate you if you don't get this right."
Andrew rubbed his face, groaning through his fingers.
Ciarán lowered his tone to a whisper. "Fucks gotten into you, Andy? You're a wreck over her."
"It's nothing." Andrew fibbed, but Ciarán knew better. He could see it in the slouched posture, the unfocused eyes, the scrunched features.
"You're acting head over heels-"
Andrew shot back into a taut position, demeanor switched to something far more serious. "Don't start that."
Ciarán didn't even flinch at the change of tone, a smirk pulling at his lips as though he was expecting this reaction. "Start what?"
"That." He pointed towards his friend's smug face. "It's nothing like that. She's... hard to impress. And hard to get through to. That's what's stressing me, nothing else."
Andrew huffed, not realizing until then he had barely taken a breath. Ciarán's words floated through his mind— because of course he had thought about it. Her obvious teasing at the bar, their sparking touches on the boardwalk, the silence that always lingered a bit too long between them; who's he kidding, Andrew thought about it every moment he was awake. But that's all it was; a few thoughts and his hopeless romanticism getting the best of him. Never past that. Never could be.
"Alright, mate." Ciarán shrugged with his hands up, defensively. "Just... do something calm for this last one. Rehearsals have been rough. She'll probably just want some time away."
Andrew nodded. It seemed Ciarán could slip into great advice whenever he felt, always leaving his friend stunned with the sudden wiseness-
"I'm gonna take a fat piss. Don't run yourself mad in the meantime."
With that, Ciarán slipped by Andrew and to the bathroom. He couldn't help but let the smile overtake his face as he watched him run by, a hand clutching the front of his jeans. He shook his head, glancing around the room to ground himself from his sky high thoughts.
Wren, Elise and Isiah all huddled by his organ, scrolling through various social medias and occasionally sharing the funny videos or baby photos with each other. Their faces radiated happiness, and Andrew was glad to see it. Over the last 3 weeks him and Gwen put everyone through hell catching up on their behind rehearsals, and they were confident the band was at their peak performance now, more than ready for tour.
His eyes scanned over to Ivy and Gwen in the opposing corner by the table. Gwen sat cross legged in her usual chair, head tilted up to Ivy with smiles spread on their faces. Their conversation seemed enticing, with excited laughs that had them smacking each others arms and heated debates over whether Pixar or Disney had their hearts.
Andrew watched on for a moment in wonder. He had seen Gwen nearly pass out from mental fatigue at her desk these last few days, but she seemed more alive than ever while talking to Ivy. He bit back a smile at their obvious connection and turned his head towards the foyer as the door swung open, the knob slamming into the wall from the high wind.
"Fuck me!" Vivienne exclaimed as she shoved the door shut with her body, turning the lock to ensure the freezing air wouldn't poke through. She shivered, leather suit covered in rain as she paced into the room for the space heater like a moth to a flame. "It's complete armageddon out there! I had to walk my bike the last few minutes because the wind tried to knock me off!"
"Nature's revenge for you being late." Gwen smiled, her attention turned to Vivienne as she ripped off the wet leather and threw it into a lazy heap with her gloves.
She crouched by the heater, hands on her arms to rub her now exposed skin. Her outfit choice seemed less than smart for the weather— a tight black tank top, a black and white nailshead patterned straight skirt that stopped at her mid thigh, and a pair of fishnets that did nothing to keep her warm.
"And for not wearing a jacket." Andrew added in, and Vivienne shot him a glare.
"Fuck off." She threw back with a lighthearted tone, and Andrew shook his head with a smile. Ciarán raced back from the bathroom at the sudden commotion, taking his place with his guitar and an exasperated grin at the sight of Vivienne.
"What's the deal with the outfit, fucker?" His breathy irish accent twisting his words made Vivienne chuckle. He pulled at the buttons on his denim overalls that covered his red tee. "You look like you're going to a bar, not a rehearsal."
"I was thinking someone's gotta carry the slack when you're dressed like a cabbage patch doll."
Gwen and Ivy smacked each other in silent laughter, while Isiah belted out into howls. Ciarán scrunched his face as Vivienne sauntered by to her set, his eyes turning to Andrew.
"The hell is a cabbage patch doll?" He whispered, and Andrew shook his head with a smile.
"Don't worry about it," He patted his shoulder, reaching down and grabbing his guitar. "Just take it as a compliment."
Ciarán pursed his lips and brushed back a few blonde locks that fell in his face, rolling his shoulders back with the confidence that the false compliment gave him. Gwen took her place at the head of the room for the final time, her meeting talk borderline erratic from the clear lack of sleep. She twisted at strands of her red hair as she spoke, her words fading away by the end of her talk.
The last rehearsal border-lined 5 hours, with two run through of the entire set and Andrew and Gwen's small corrections to every song only adding more time. Tear down was as quick as could be, with everyone wrapping up cords like it was a race for their lives, grabbing their jackets, and rushing to their cars to go home and sleep in their own beds for a few more nights before they were subject to the beds of the tour bus.
Vivienne slumped against the wall as everyone finished up, her head tilted onto her own shoulder and her eyes struggling to stay open. She crossed her arms over her chest, hoping to go unnoticed as everyone filtered out. Fortunately enough, her anti-social dreams came true as everyone brushed past her in their own tired hazes, giving her time to recharge for just a moment before Andrew approached her.
"Gwen finally got these printed." Andrew's voice, silky and laced with exhaustion, caused her to tilt her head up to meet his gaze. In his hands was a small stack of papers, which he extended to her. Vivienne accepted them, eyebrows furrowed in confusion as she examined the top paper.
The poster was bright blue, titled for the WASTELAND BABY WORLD TOUR, with elements of the ocean surrounding the images and many tour dates spanning the 3 legs of the tour. Next to the first leg of the tour was an image of Andrew, an oil painting of him under the water with a few books floating around him. The European and Asian leg was accompanied by a professional image of Ciarán, dressed in a half buttoned striped shirt and slacks holding his guitar above his head; obviously on stage from a previous show.
The bottom of the page surprised her the most. Next to the last leg of the tour; the last few shows in America, was a shot of Vivienne; pre-haircut and slamming her sticks down on her cymbals. The photo was completely candid, taken during the midst of a rehearsal where Vivienne was too distracted to care for someone's phone turned towards her. Her face reflected this, features twisted with passion for the music she was playing and her eyes brightened with joy. The image was blended into the oil painting style of the poster as well.
"Holy shit." Vivienne muttered, pushing herself from the ground while holding the papers in one hand. "This is amazing. How did you get this painting filter to work so well?"
Andrew chuckled, hands tucked into his pockets. "It's not a filter, my mother painted it all."
Vivienne's jaw hung slack with awe. "No fucking way— I mean, she's a beautiful artist. This is just... unbelievable."
"I'll tell her you sent your thanks." Andrew scanned her face as she continued to stare at the poster, eyes glimmering with pure euphoria. "Why did you need these, anyways?"
Vivienne bit the inside of her cheek for a moment, seemingly ready to hold back her real meanings like usual and tell Andrew some fib. However, her brain was pushed to the side as her heart seemed to take over with her words. "I'm going to give them to my family— show them drumming actually got me somewhere."
Andrew was surprised by her openness, but he kept it hidden behind his flat expression. "Did they not believe it would?"
Vivienne scoffed, shaking her head with a smile still. "They made me a black sheep for it. They wanted a doctor, a lawyer, an accountant— just about anything but what I wanted to do. They wanted anything but me." She mindlessly ran her thumb over the scar running across her face, her movements unconscious but very much noticed by Andrew. Her words shifted as she pulled back a bit, clearing her throat. "But it's alright. I'm just glad I can show them now. I'll mail them out tomorrow." She placed the posters onto her base drum. "What do you have planned?"
Andrew poked his tongue through his cheek in thought. It was rare when Vivienne felt comfortable enough to share tidbits of her past, and it hurt Andrew to see her revert back to closing herself off when she felt she shared too much.
"Where do they live?"
Vivienne's face pinched with pure confusion. "What?"
"Your family, are they local?" Andrew pushed, his words filled with an unwavering sense of conviction.
Vivienne stuttered for her words for a moment, taken aback by his bluntness. "Well- They uh... They actually live on Pine street. It's in the projects, about 10 minutes from here."
"Pine street... That's on the way to where we're going tonight." Andrew scratched his beard in thought. "Alright, let's go."
"Go where?" Vivienne questioned as Andrew strutted towards the door. She followed close behind, cautious but intrigued by his odd behavior.
"To drop those posters off, darling." He grabbed his helmet from the foyer as he spoke, handing over Vivienne's that sat next to it.
The honey laced pet name made Vivienne stutter for a response to his proposal. He had called her it quite a few times before, but this time made her feel different. It made her feel fiery and full of life, like a new piece of her had ignited.
Andrew was quick to fill the silence. He pulled the door open and gestured to the outside. "Let's show your family you're a fuckin' star, now."
————
Vivienne's motorcycle stuttered to a stop, her feet swinging down to hold her and Andrew up on the pavement as she pulled the keys. She let out a heaving breath, her arms shakily tilting the bike to its side as Andrew kicked out the stand for her.
His hands still laid gently on her hips from the ride, the touch now unbeknownst to Vivienne as her entire body was overtaken with an anxious buzzing. Andrew could feel it— the emotion might as well have been seeping through her skin. Distress. Her bones shook with it, her mind clouded with sheer panic as she stared up at the house in front of them.
It was nothing special; a worn down duplex with green paneling that was rotting down to the cracked foundation. The front yard, if you could even call a square of dead grass and pavement that, was enclosed by a flimsy fence and a "NO TRESPASSING" sign hanging off of the chain-link. Although the apartment blended into the impoverished area, the very sight of it made Vivienne tremble.
Andrew slid up the visor of his helmet, his other hand sliding off of Vivienne's hip out of hopes to make her more comfortable, but her body language continued to worsen as she stared blankly at the house. He leaned in slightly, his helmet pressing against hers.
"It's alright." He spoke gently, unsure of how to comfort her in the moment, but seemingly succeeding as she took a deeper breath. "You're okay. They won't see you."
"What if they do?" Vivienne's voice was unsteady, and Andrew could feel blades sinking into his heart at the sound of her beginning to crack.
He took a moment to breathe himself before he responded. "Then I'll be right here."
Andrew knew he was bluffing, and Vivienne did too. He couldn't fight- he could barely yell without feeling shameful. But the gesture of him being there was enough to make Vivienne slip up her visor and turn around.
"Swear?" She asked, their gazes connecting for a moment too long. Andrew could feel his face burn up at the bronze eyes scanning his for the truth, and he thanked god that the helmet was covering his expression.
He crossed a finger over his heart, making an X over the fabric of his jean jacket. "Swear."
And although Vivienne's face was obscured as well, he could see the gleam of a smile in her eyes.
"Alright." She huffed. "Alright. Alright. Alright." She hyped herself up with every repeat, her boots smacking the ground as she slipped off the seat quickly. She opened the storage strapped to the back of her bike and pulled out the folded posters, running her thumbs over the paper nervously. She gave Andrew a shaky thumbs up, which he mirrored, as she approached the fence.
She jiggled the latch on the gate, noticing the padlock wrapped around the metal. She tucked the posters under her armpit, placed her hands firmly on the top bar of the fence, and hauled herself over in a swift hop. Andrew's eyes widened at the motion, but he didn't object to the legality of it as Vivienne stumbled up the path nervously.
He watched as she took shaky steps up the porch, her shoulders rising and dropping with deep breaths. She fumbled a few of the posters out of the stack, leaning down and beginning to slide the posters into the mail slot.
She jumped as the sound of a high pitched yapping disturbed the air, nearly falling onto her ass from the surprise. She shoved the posters through the slot fully, spinning on her heels and running down the stairs. Andrew shot up from the seat as the front door began to open just as Vivienne reached the fence, throwing the rest of the posters onto the lawn behind her. She lifted a leg to climb over the fence, the situation quickly turning into a panic as the zipper of her bike suit caught onto a loose link and grounded her back onto the pavement.
Andrew was quick to action, running to the fence while the figure of an older woman emerged in the doorway. He ignored the woman as she began screaming in what he could only assume was very angry Japanese, freeing Vivienne from the fence and then placing both hands onto her hips. In one swift motion she lifted her from the ground and over his shoulder, using an arm over her lower back to secure her as he swung her over the fence and back onto the ground. Vivienne was too full of adrenaline to acknowledge the flustered twist of her stomach from Andrew's hand catching on her ass when her feet hit the pavement. She had made it out just in time for the small white dog to come barreling down the sidewalk and jump against the fence with more barks.
The two clumsily climbed onto the bike, the woman's screaming quickly overtaken by the roar of the motorcycle as they took off. Andrew was barely fully on the bike before the wheels began to spin, his hands quickly clamping onto her hips and his chest pressing onto her back to stabilize himself. Andrew felt it yet again— the pure adrenaline that Vivienne gave him, this time more intense than ever. When they slowed to a stoplight, Andrew could feel his heart pumping in his ears, having to refocus his eyes as Vivienne spun around to face him.
"That was fucking great!" She squealed, her eyes filled with light again. Andrew couldn't help but swoon, his stare half lidded and stuck on Vivienne as she panted from the rush. She didn't even notice his infatuation as she turned back to the red light, swinging her feet excitedly to the sides. "I didn't realize they still had that annoying ass dog, I thought that thing would be dead by now."
He could only reply with a hum, completely intoxicated by her. He could feel himself falling into her grasp, completely at will to her. He knew it wasn't healthy— to be so enchanted by her without the assurance of her feeling the same, but god it felt good.
His mind tried to pull him back. She could break his heart. She could ruin the tour. She could do the same as the last and use him. None of this was successful to pull him away. He was digging himself his own grave; but if there was any possibility he could lay in it with her, he didn't care if it would kill him to be hers. He pushed the emotions back for just a moment when the light turned green. Andrew said directions he had memorized earlier in the day into her ear as she drove them into lower Manhattan, eventually ending in a parking lot by the beach. Vivienne slid off of the bike first, pulling her helmet off and shaking her hair out.
"Manhattan beach?" She questioned, taking in the scenery of their surroundings. It was just past sunset, leaving a blue grey sheen over the city and the yellow sands. The area was nearly clear of people due to the later hour, leaving just Vivienne, Andrew, and a few fisherman along the shoreline.
"I think we've had enough energy for tonight, and overall." Andrew held his helmet under one arm, using his other hand to guide Vivienne with a palm on her back. They walked slowly, Vivienne's eyes on the water, but Andrew's trained on her. Her tanned skin. Her slightly arched nose. Her full brows and her blushed cheeks. All of it overtook Andrew's senses, every bit of him becoming more and more consumed by her.
"Sounds alright to me." Vivienne muttered.
Andrew led them to the large dock, made of sturdy wood and holding a closed café in the very middle. He took a deep breath at the height of the dock, held up by many stilts above the ocean, glancing around to distract himself. He dug in his pocket for a few quarters when he spotted a fish food dispenser, inserting them into the slots and dumping a handful into a paper cup. He split it into two, handing one to Vivienne who stood by the fence of the dock, elbows propped up on the wood as she looked off into the ocean.
"Smells like shit." She muttered.
Andrew shook his head with a smile. "Sorry, I can't just control how bad it smells out here, Viv." Andrew's heart dropped immediately after the words fell from his tongue. He had heard her name shortened so many times in the last few rehearsals it just felt natural in the moment. He quickly began to backtrack. "I- Shit. I didn't mean to-"
"It's fine." Vivienne shook her head as Andrew began to get worked up, and his shoulders quickly dropped at her calm demeanor. Darker clouds had begun to shield the sky, leaving only a dim light to illuminate her soft features. "I really don't mind it."
"Really?" Andrew was dumbfounded, his head tilted as he searched for the hint of a lie on her face. "You nearly took my head off with a drumstick when I called you it at first."
"That's because you were being a dick, then." Vivienne giggled; sweet as can be and like a perfect melody to Andrew's ears. "I just..." She blew a bit of air through her lips, staring down at her cup full of fish food and shaking it around. "It was my family's nickname for me— my sisters specifically. It just never felt right from anyone else, yaknow?"
Andrew took a pinch of pellets and tossed them into the water. "Feels right from me, though?" He smirked, and Vivienne gave a playful scoff.
"Don't push it." She did the same, watching as a group of fish jumped wildly for the food. "But yes, you can use it."
They sat in a comfortable silence for a moment, tossing pebbles of food to the fish and listening to the soft waves hitting the shore every few seconds. It was serene; the closest to a perfect moment Andrew had ever experienced. It was something so calm and uneventful, yet so important to him at the moment.
"Well, eye for an eye, Andy." Vivienne smiled as Andrew's head snapped over to her, surprised at the liberty she took with the nickname. "I get to push your boundaries now."
"Fair enough." He nodded. "Fire away."
Vivienne thought for a moment, unprepared, before replying. "What's with the old drummer?"
Andrew inhaled sharply, similarly unprepared to answer. "Shit... she uh... she did a lot. Do you want the short or long story?"
"Keep it short." She shrugged.
"She was with us for a year or so; she was always really close with everyone, including our backup singers. She started to show some... interest in me, and I played into it stupidly. We kept it quiet because she wanted to, and a few months later I found it she was doing the same with Isiah and Ciarán."
"Jesus..." Vivienne murmured. "She really homie hopped that quickly?"
"Sure." Andrew laughed breathily, not used to the slang but appreciative of Vivienne's constant light heartedness keeping to mood high. "The only reason we found out about her games was because Isiah couldn't keep his fuckin' mouth shut for the 2 days she was with him."
Vivienne broke into giggles, followed by Andrew. They hung their heads over the bannister, their voices fizzling out after a few seconds of shared laughter. Andrew continued to throw more food at the fishes, while Vivienne's gaze drifted over to the side of his face.
He felt her eyes on him immediately, softly scanning every feature of his from a side profile. She tried to be discreet by not turning her head fully, but Andrew could see every one of her movements clearly. He was admiring her too, after all.
Just as he turned his head to lock eyes with her, his heart racing when he saw the light smile painted on her face— he felt it.
"Ah, shit." He muttered, wiping the drop from his forehead. He tilted his chin up to the sky, spotting the thick, charcoal clouds that had completely blanketed the sky. The rain began to pick up quickly, turning into a drizzle by the time he looked back down at Vivienne. "We should go before it gets bad."
Vivienne nodded, taking off alongside of him. Andrew ripped his jacket from his arms, shielding them as they ran back to the bike.