☆
"Appears to be a standard sequence violation." The woman stated, glancing around at the dessert that surrounded them as the portal-like door she had just emerged from disappeared, "Branch is growing at a stable slope. Variant identified."
"I beg your pardon?" Loki questioned, cocking his head, an incredulous expression on his face.
"On behalf of the Time Variance Authority, I hereby arrest you for crimes against the Sacred Timeline. Hands up." The woman, seeming to be the leader of the group around her, continued, her last statement causing the various other soldiers to point their weapons, which seemed to look like hot pokers, in Loki's direction. "You're coming with us."
"I'm sorry- who's 'us'?"
She powered up her own weapon, matching the stance of those around her, "Last chance Variant."
Loki began to chuckle in response, then looking back up at her, "It's been a very long day, and I think I've had my fill of idiots in armoured suits telling me what to do, so, if you don't mind, this is actually your last chance."
The woman began slowly approaching, weapon raised.
"Now get out of my way." He finished, stalking forward.
The soldier immediately wacked him in the face, his body seeming to move in slow motion as he was knocked back. She casually moved over to him, fastening a collar-device round his neck.
"You're now moving at 1/16th speed, but feeling all that pain in real time."
As his movement speed returned to normal, Loki fell into the sand with a grunt, two soldiers quickly going over to grab his arms and haul him back up.
"Reset the timeline" The leader commanded, picking up the tesseract as he was led away through another portal-door.
☆
Having been parted from the tesseract, as well as his beloved asgaurdian outfit, and enduring an incredibly peculiar processing-system, Loki was now being led down what appeared to be a courtroom.
"Laufeyson. Variant L1130, AKA Loki Laufeyson," The judge started, "is charged with sequence violation 7-20-89."
He was pushed onto a small platform.
The lady in the judge's seat looked up from the file she had been reading from. "How do you plead?"
Loki scoffed. "Madam, a god doesn't plead. Look this has been a very enjoyable pantomime , but I'd like to go home now. "
"Are you guilty or not guilty, sir?"
He scoffed again. "Guilty of being the God of Mischief? Yes. Guilty of finding all this incredibly tedious? Yes. Guilty of a 'crime' against the 'Sacred Timeline'? Absolutely not, you have the wrong person."
"Oh, really? And who should we have?" She raised her eyebrows in question.
"I suspect the Avengers." Loki replied, "You see, I only came into possession of the Tesseract because they travelled through time. No doubt in a last-ditch effort to stave off my ascent to God King."
"That's quite an accusation."
The door behind him clicked shut as someone else entered the room.
"Oh believe me, you can smell the cologne of two Tony Starks. You speak of 'Time Criminals'? It's they you should be after."
The man that had just entered took a seat in one of the pews.
"Perhaps you could provide me with a taskforce and resources," Loki gestured his hands at B-15, the soldier who had brought him in, "and I could return and eliminate them for you."
"We're not here to talk about the Avengers."
"Oh, no?"
"No. What they did was supposed to happen. You escaping was not." The judge leaned forward, crossing her fingers together.
Loki started laughing, yet again. He was finding this quite ridiculous at this point. "Right. Uh- 'Not supposed to happen.'? According to whom?"
"The Time-Keepers?" She replied, speaking as though it were the most obvious thing in the universe.
"Oh, the Time-Keepers! Right. Well, perhaps I should speak to these 'Time-Keepers', gods to gods." He suggested.
"I'm sorry, but they're quite busy."
"Oh, they are? What are they doing?"
"Dictating the proper flow of time."
"I see. Right, and then what do you do?"
"Dictate the proper flow of time according to their dictations!" The judge began to get frustrated. "How do you plead?"
"Guilty..." Loki paused, raising his hands outwards, "Of this."
He clenched his hands into fists.
Nothing happened.
B-15 stifled a snigger behind him.
He tried again. Nothing happened.
"What going on?" The Judge asked, looking towards B-15.
"Hang on. Everyone quiet." Loki stated, trying another time.
B-15 stopped her chuckling. "He's trying to use his powers, ma,am."
"Don't rush me." He grunted as he tried another time, smacking his hands down when he failed to do anything. "Damn it! Why won't it work?"
"Magic powers?" The judge smiled, "They're no good in the TVA, Mr Laufeyson. The court finds you guilty, and I sentence you to be reset." She hit her gavel down. "Next case, please!"
B-15 took Loki by the arm, attempting to lead him away.
"'Reset'? What does that mean? What, is it bad? What does it mean?" He struggled against her grip, causing another soldier to come over and take a hold of his other arm. "Hey! You ridiculous bureaucrats will not dictate how my story ends!"
"It's not your story, Mr Laufeyson. It never was."
"You have no idea what I'm capable of!" He shouted, pulling against the restraint of the two soldiers.
"I- I think I might." The man who had come in earlier stood up, "Have an idea what he's capable of."
"Approach the bench." The judge sighed.
He walked over to her.
"Hi." He said softly, smiling.
The judge leaned over, "If you're thinking what I think you're thinking, it's a bad idea."
"Ok, I'm just- chasing a hunch."
"You already have a pet pyromaniac who almost burnt down my office. What is it with you and broken things?"
"I know. I'll keep them out of trouble," He promised. "And, I do think it's time we taught Týr some social skills."
She sighed again. "Anything goes sideways, it's on you."
"Okay. I feel like I'm always looking up to you. I like it. It's appropriate." He whispered, then turned back towards Loki, who was now staring at him in utter confusion.
"And who are you?" He asked, accusingly.
He only got a smile in response.
-
The two were now walking down some sort of hallway, Loki looking around in disgust as they did so.
"I'm going to burn this place to the ground." He claimed.
"Yea, we've already had someone try that, but I'll show you where my desk is, you can start there." The man chuckled.
Loki suddenly stopped, having noticed the view from the hallway, which doubled as some sort of balcony over the endless expanse of the TVA.
"Have a look." The man said, motioning at the view.
They walked closed, looking out at the mass of structures.
"Home sweet home."
"I thought there was no magic here?" Loki questioned.
"There isn't."
The two paused for a moment, taking it all in, before Loki turned back around.
"That's not real." He concluded.
"It is, and, unfortunately, so is all the paperwork." The man began leading him away. "Good tinder for your fire, though. Come on."
"This place is a nightmare."
"That's another department. Now that department I'll help you burn down. Don't tell Týr though, he'll accuse me of stealing his thing."
Loki gave him a questioning look.
He led them onto an elevator, holding his hand out once they were inside, introducing himself. "I'm Agent Mobius, by the way."
The other just stared at his outstretched hand, before ignoring it and looking back up. "Are you taking me somewhere to kill me?"
"No. That's where you just were. I'm taking you some place to talk." Mobius told him.
"Well I don't like to talk."
"But you do like to lie, which you just did. Because we both know you love to talk." He chuckled, putting his hand up to make a talking motion, "Talkie-talkie."
"How long have you been here?" Loki asked.
"I don't know. It's hard to say, you know, time passes differently here in the TVA."
"What does that mean?"
"You'll catch up."
The elevator doors opened, revealing another hallway, this one considerably more busy than the last.
"So, you're part of the TVA's courageous and dedicated workforce?"
"Yes." Mobius confirmed, leading Loki through the throngs of workers.
"You were created by the 'Time-Keepers'."
"Yup."
"To protect the 'Sacred Timeline'."
"Correct."
Loki laughed as he stopped walking.
"Is that funny?"
"The idea that your club decides the fate of trillions of people across all of existence at the behest of three- space-lizards? Yes, it's funny" He started moving again, walking over to where Mobius now stood by a guarded door. "It's absurd."
"I though you didn't like to talk?"
Loki scoffed.
The door was opened, and Mobius gestured his hand towards it, "After you."
They walked into some sort of interrogation room, decorated in shades of orange, which seemed to be the TVA's signature colour. The doors clicked shut behind them.
"For the record, this really does feel like a killing-me kind of room."
Mobius sat down at a small table at the centre, "Not big on trust are you?"
"Trust is for children and dogs. There's only one person you can trust."
"Yourself? I like it! Slap it on a T-shirt." He joked, fiddling with a projector that was placed on the table.
"If the TVA truly oversees all of time, how have I never heard of you until now?"
"'Cause you've never needed to. You've always lived within your set path."
"I live within whatever path I choose." Loki proclaimed.
"Sure you do. Okay, come have a seat."
He stalked towards Mobius, who quickly grabbed some device off of the table and pressed on it, causing Loki to find himself standing back where he had been just a few seconds ago.
"I told you, time moves differently in the TVA. Come on, sit down." He took his own seat on one of the chairs. "Let's get into this."
Loki slowly moved over to the other chair, opposite Mobius'.
"Go on, have a seat."
He sat down in the chair, scooting slightly closer to the table and folding his arms over his chest, glaring at the other man.
"If looks could kill."
"What do you want from me?"
"Well, let's start with a little cooperation."
"Not my forte."
"Really?" Mobius asked, "Even when you're wooing someone powerful you intend to betray? Come on."
"You don't know anything about me."
"Maybe I'd like to learn" He opened the canned drink in his hand, taking a sip, "I specialise in the pursuit of dangerous Variants."
"Like myself?"
"Mm- no, particularly dangerous Variants. You're just a little pussycat. Speaking of dangerous Variants though, there is someone I'd like you to meet later." He picked up a piece of paper, moving it in front of him, "Now, I got a set of questions for you. You answer them honestly, and then, maybe, I can give you something you want. And you wanna get out of here, right?"
Loki tilted his head to the side.
"Yea, so we'll start there. Should you return, what are you gonna do?"
"Finish what I started."
"Which is?"
"Claim my throne."
"You wan't to be- king?"
"I don't 'want' to be, I was born to be." Loki claimed.
"I know, but king of what exactly?"
The self-proclaimed god just scoffed, shaking his head, "You wouldn't understand."
"Try me."
There was a pause, then, "Midgard."
"AKA Earth." Mobius said as he wrote something down on the paper in front of him, "All right. Now you're the king of Midgard, then what? Happily ever after?"
"Asgard, the Nine Realms."
"Space?"
"Space?" Loki repeated.
"Space is big. That'd be a nice feather in your cap. 'Loki, the King of Space.'"
"Mock me if you dare."
"No, I'm not!" He laughed slightly, "Honestly, I'm actually a fan. Yeah. And I guess I'm wondering why does someone with so much range just wanna rule?"
Another pause.
"I would've made it easy for them." Loki stated.
"People like easy."
"The first and most oppressive lie ever uttered was the song of freedom."
"How's that one go?"
"For nearly every living thing, choice breeds shame and uncertainty and regret. There's a fork in every road, yet the wrong path always taken."
"Good. Yeah. You said 'nearly every living thing', so I'm guessing you don't fall into that category?"
Loki chuckled, "The Time-Keepers have built quite the circus, and I see the clowns are playing their parts to perfection."
☆
The doors opened just as Mobius pulled Loki to his feet.
"What are you doing?" Hunter B-15 asked as she marched into the room.
"My job. Is it yours to interrupt?" Mobius retorted.
"We have a few situations. One of them being your little arsonist friend." She said, clearly annoyed.
Loki furrowed his brows in confusion.
Mobius sighed, shrugging, "I'm sure Ty's fine, he's probably just stretching his legs, I mean you can't expect that room to hold him."
"Yea, well, last time he did this he almost managed to burn down Judge Renslayer's office, so I think I'd be happier with a Variant as dangerous as him staying locked up." She glared at him, walking back towards the doors.
Mobius sighed again, then, pointing a finger at Loki, "Don't go anywhere. It was just getting good. Spirited!" He said as he followed after B-15, "And don't worry, you'll get to meet my friend later. You guys can bond over your shared wish to burn this place down."
The two left the room, doors closing behind them.
☆
AUTHOR'S NOTE:
and so it begins :) idk when ill end up posting this, but at the time of writing it i am currently hyperfixating on loki and ignoring all my other projects including my other fic im supposed to be writing :D
- Arachnid
word count: 2275
27/04/2024 EDIT:
re-reading to help inspire me for the next chapter (10 - in progress rn :D) and im finding SO MANY mistakes i hate this.