Naomi hadn't known when it would happen, but she'd expected Greg to storm off tonight. He hadn't done it at the game when she'd soothed her nerves with Kieran's kisses, nor after the romantic moments at the table that made her heart swell. Greg hadn't bolted despite her declarations of Kieran's supportive nature, but the mention of the party did him in. She understood why. Their friend group had all moved on together without him, and he feared being left behind.
He'd had similar fears during freshman year of high school and university too. He'd grow nervous when Naomi spent more time with friends from basketball or people she'd met through Shivanna. Then, he'd act awkwardly around Naomi and ask her if they were still hanging out in a panic but also unsmoothly tell her it was fine if she was busy. She'd always laugh and say he couldn't get rid of her that easily, and he'd revert to regular Greg.
"Wait," she called as they reached the parking lot near the patio, far enough from the acrid scent of tobacco smoke.
Greg stopped beside a red SUV and stared at her with a straight face. "Look, I tried, but the only person who wants me to hang out with you all is me. I can take a hint."
"Our breakup made things awkward between everyone initially, but it doesn't have to continue."
He sighed. "I understand why you didn't rush to tell me about Kieran, but Marc? We live together. I've been his friend forever. He should have had my back."
Naomi raised an eyebrow as a loud car drove by on the busy street facing the lot. "Like you had his at your party?"
"I've apologized and stopped seeing those guys outside work."
"Do you ever talk to him about the discrimination he and Nimkii face? Do you volunteer with him or show support in other ways?" While Naomi didn't do the latter often, she gave Marc a space to vent or discuss issues that bothered him.
Greg hung his head. "Not exactly. The past few months haven't been the best for me. But I'll try."
She stayed quiet as she had also suffered, but she wanted to avoid making this about her again. She'd done that last weekend. A group of people chatting and laughing walked past them and toward the pub like Greg, Marc, Shivanna, and Naomi used to do before all this drama.
Greg rearranged his brown hair. "You and Marc are my closest friends, and I've pushed you both away."
"You had Tara."
He dug his hands into his shorts' pockets. "Tara's not supportive. Or she hasn't been for a while."
"Since you broke up the first time?" In her shoes, Naomi would struggle to be supportive and trusting too. It would be like watching Kieran date Brinny if, and for whatever reason, they split up, he would only care for Naomi when he and Brinny were over. The scenario made Naomi nauseous.
"No, a lot longer than that." Greg's quiet, ashamed tone stirred sympathy in her chest.
He'd never even hinted things were bad, and she and Greg used to talk about everything. Was he being sincere now?
"You two seemed happy."
He rocked on his toes, glancing at a couple cuddling on the patio. "I always wanted to make her happy, but it got harder and harder. She pointed out all my mistakes, flaws, or if I'd upset her. Some nights, all she'd do was tear me down." He scratched at his neck and stared at the pavement.
"That sucks."
If Naomi hadn't confessed at the bar, would he have divulged how his relationship with Tara was? He'd still seemed so in love with her, and they got back together. She couldn't imagine doing that with someone who devalued her, but enough people stayed in toxic relationships. Greg had been weird on their first date, so anxious about making the meal perfect and impressing her. He had berated himself for not being able to do anything right. Maybe he'd been thinking about Tara differently than Naomi had imagined.
"Do you want to talk about it?" Naomi asked.
"No, it's fine. You should enjoy your night." He took a few steps toward the bus stop. In the distance, one approached from the direction of the casino, but Greg needed one heading in the opposite direction.
"Am I the only person you've told?"
Greg turned back to her, fidgeting with his hands. "Yeah."
"Is that why you worried so much when we dated?"
He nodded and met her gaze, steadying himself with a breath. "When you tried to confess your feelings at the bar, I heard her mocking laughter and her whispering, 'She'll never see you as more than a friend.'"
No wonder he'd gone for that shot.
"When that woman flirted with me, I needed someone to want me again, so I went with it."
An emotional icepack hook-up, Kieran had called it. How was he so talented at noticing this stuff?
"I never meant to hurt you. I didn't think you'd ever consider me romantically. When you brought up your asexuality when we were dating, it reopened old wounds Tara left. I was so wrapped up in your lack of sexual attraction seeming like rejection that I hadn't considered what my reactions did to you."
She forced her mind to stay on this sidewalk with the dulled sounds of laughter, conversion, and classic rock. "Yeah, it fucking hurt. Your opinion meant more to me than anyone else's then."
"I'm sorry."
She didn't want to keep rehashing their breakup, but the new information about Tara made her curious. "Why'd you get back together if she was that awful?"
"Even though it was flawed, and she broke up with me, she still loved me. I wasn't sure anyone else would."
"You picked up someone at the bar."
"That's just lust. You knew almost everything about me and rejected me. Most of my exes found issues with our relationships too. Tara's biggest concern was the chemistry between you and me, but since that was no longer possible, I assumed she'd take me back."
"She did."
"Yeah, but it had to be an open relationship."
That was surprising, given Tara's past jealousy of their friendship.
"Initially, I thought it could work, but she made these rules like it couldn't be any of our friends, and I had to run everyone by her first."
"I'm not an expert on open relationships, but communication is probably what makes them work, right? Going for friends would lead to drama. We know that."
"The rules only applied to me. She'd tell me who she was seeing after the fact or ditch me for them at the last minute. Then she'd compare me to them when we were together, saying she was trying to improve our relationship. She slept with two of my coworkers while we were dating, telling them things I'd never want them to know." Greg's face was red, and he clenched his hands into fists at his sides.
Naomi had found Tara off-putting, but if she'd got back together to humiliate and control her ex, that was horrible.
"That's shitty of her."
"I ended it after that."
"I hope you find someone who treats you better."
"Thanks." He kicked at the ground. "If I learned anything, it's to communicate more. I hate that I ran instead of doing that with you."
"A clean slate relationship is pretty incredible. It's easier for me to be honest."
"Kieran has the trust of a saint if he was that friendly to me after you and I talked in Gimli."
That hit her right in the chest with shockwaves making her muscles tense. "I didn't tell him about it."
"Really?" Greg studied her. "Why?"
A throat cleared to Naomi's left, and she turned to find her boyfriend without his usual cheery grin. "I'm curious about that too."
She swallowed a lump as the evening air grew chillier. "It was a conversation about feelings and events that are very much in the past. I didn't want to worry you over nothing." She entwined her hands with Kieran's, but it didn't erase the lines trenched in his forehead.
"She's made it very clear her feelings were only for you. You're a very lucky man." After Greg's words, Kieran stiffened more than relaxed.
"I should go." Greg tucked his hands in his pockets. "Thanks for being the one person who will still listen to my shit." He turned to Kieran. "Take good care of her. She deserves that."
As Greg took off for the bus stop, Naomi laughed awkwardly. "That was weird."
Kieran's Adam's apple moved as he swallowed. "Yeah, I thought you trusted me more than that."
"I do trust you completely. It was a weird conversation that I wished to forget happened. I just wanted to enjoy the weekend together, drama-free."
"The weekend's been over for four days."
Naomi nodded. He deserved an explanation, as her mind would concoct all kinds of theories if the roles were reversed. "I was all mopey because Jodie had found this old keychain that Greg had given me years ago, and it made me recall losing my first dog and my teenage heartbreak. You guys were so happy. I needed to be alone to clear my head, but when I got to the beach, he was there. I guess he came earlier to surprise me but was shocked when he saw you and me together."
"He thought you still liked him?"
"Yeah, I'd tried to tell him about us at softball, and he assumed the opposite. I never intended to mislead him."
Kieran was quiet for a moment before he spoke in a gentle yet tentative tone. "Do you have feelings for him?"
Naomi's eyes widened. Kieran didn't think she'd leave him, did he?
"No, of course not." The conversation had stirred up old emotions and a few natural curiosities, but nothing that would hurt her and Kieran's bond. "Remembering the breakup brings back pain, but I'm in a much better place with you. This." She looped her arms around his neck. "Is the only thing I want."
They shared a tender kiss that turned her insides into a thick, warm soup of joy. Kieran smiled afterward, but he wasn't as dazed as he usually was by their attraction. This had shaken his trust. She couldn't blame the entire moment on impulsivity because she'd had time to tell him, and she hadn't.
"I'm sorry I hid that conversation. If you'd rather hear about it, I can tell you when I run into my ex."
"I'd like that." Kieran continued to look at her like he wanted to hear more.
"Tonight he was feeling shitty and abandoned by our friend group, then we talked about his ex and how awful she was to him. She got him into an open relationship and then used it to taunt him and sleep with his coworkers."
"If anyone deserved that, I mean..." Kieran shrugged.
"Do you like when guys hurt Brinny?"
He shifted his weight from foot to foot. "Point taken."
"Marc and I are his best friends, and we've both distanced ourselves, so he hasn't talked about any of this. I got a village in you, Shivanna, Ian, Marc, and Jake to cheer me up. Going through a breakup alone would have been hell, and he just endured three."
"I can't sympathize with the guy. Not with how he hurt you. I'm not sure why you do."
"We have a lot of history. My romantic feelings are gone, but I care as a friend."
"He doesn't deserve that or you."
"Maybe. But do you know who does?" She wrapped her arms around his neck and stepped closer until their bodies were flush. "You," she whispered before capturing his lips in hers. She kissed him with more intensity and longing than usual, and he was quick to do the same, tangling her hair in his fingers, and breathing heavily when they came up for air.
"I'm sorry for worrying you. Nothing my ex says or does will come between us. I like you too much for that to happen."
Kieran pulled her into the best hug, her arms encircling his torso, and she rested her head on his soft shoulder.
She contemplated telling him she loved him, but she didn't want their first time saying it to be after discussing her ex, so she kissed him again, getting lost in the sensation.