God, my God.
Your prodigal daughter has returned.
I spilt my guts to You. Moreso than I thought I would. I admitted things I couldn't even admit to myself.
Fear was holding me back from coming home. Fear of Your punishment. Fear of Your hate. Fear of it not making any difference at all. Fear of not being enough. Fear of not having enough time to make up for the weeks I wasted away.
But I placed those fears before Your throne and You've taken them into Your hands. I no longer carry them.
You've given me strength to say "no" to worldly things that have taken me from You.
Talking to You at work has brought me such joy. I feel so much joy even writing this poem. I feel hope. I feel home. I feel like I can move on from my past.
I bowed before You the other day, at my station to show You my repentance. I repent and want to move forward, Lord. Thank You for providing me the chance.
I must now carry the cross once again and die daily, to follow You.
Carry my fears and burdens, Lord. Help me regain the strength I had in You. The faith and love I had for You. Help me become unshakable, unmovable.
I must now toughen up more than ever. I know we're in the last days and getting ever closer.
You've saved my life and helped me so many times, and for that, I thank You. Your mercy and love is truly unending. Your faithfulness is great. Greater than words can express.
Thank You for helping me home. Thank You for being there for me, Lord. I love You and am indebted to You for forever.
You chose me. You called me. You made me. And that in itself is hard to comprehend.
While I don't deserve Your love or forgiveness after what I've done to sin against You, I know it awaits me because of the godly sorrow You've blessed me with.
Repentance followed.
You are faithful and just to forgive. Why You would have mercy on me, I'll never be able to understand. But I believe You are love and must believe You love me even at my worst.
I love You, Lord.
Help me continue anew and to be stronger and more grounded in You than ever.
If You are for me, who can be against me?
You, my Savior, hold victory over all.