-Diana's POV-
I sit down on the steps outside of the house while I wait for Josephine.
Natalie left around a hour ago for an interview, she didn't say bye or anything she just left. Well, we haven't really spoke the last week since I told her I wanted Josephine to stay.
It's been kind of awkward since she's still helping me with showers, I've tried myself but it gets a little complicated..
I have been...mean to her. She said she didn't deserve it and she doesn't but I just feel angry at everything at the moment. I've tried to be nicer since I do want to share the same bed as her...but I keep ending up saying things before thinking and getting so worked up over small things.
Everyday I wake up and I go to check my phone to see if I have a hundred messages from Charlie telling me about his night or something...or asking me a weird question at four in the morning then it hits me that it will never happen again. From the moment I wake up I'm reminded. It's just hard—and so tiring so I keep getting frustrated easily.
I just miss my Charlie bear so much.
It still feels like I'm waiting for him to show up, to mess up my hair and call me chicken a million times. But that's not going to happen, he's gone and I can't bring him back no matter what I do. I feel useless for that.
Now I'm just causing Natalie stress and my ex Professor is coming to stay...she told me she was thinking of taking time off work anyway...She said she will pay Natalie for staying which I found silly.
Josephine is the only kind of friend I have...I mean I can consider her a friend. I just think maybe if I do try talk to a friend it might help—it might be stupid but I'm just trying.
Natalie hasn't said anything else about her staying, I told her a couple of days ago that she is coming today and she just shrugged. I want to kiss her and tell her sorry but I just feel like I will ruin it again somehow.
A brown BMW pulls up...Okay, wow. I stand as the car comes to a stop. I walk down the steps stepping onto the concrete while the door of the car opens and Josephine steps out looking at me.
"Josephine, hi." I smile at her and she walks up to me quickly.
"Gosh, when you had messaged me, I got such a fright when you mentioned a crash. Are you okay?" I freeze as she pulls me into a hug.
"Um..yeah—I'm fine now I just...a few other things, you know?" I ask and she pulls back, her hands staying on my shoulders as she looks at me.
"I'm so glad you are okay, besides these, are you in much pain?" She asks looking at my arms, I look too shrugging.
"No, not really, the pain has mostly stopped....Anyway, how was your drive here?" I ask her.
"It could have been worse, I don't drive much but it wasn't too bad." Her hand leave my shoulders and I nod.
"I better take some things in." She tells me.
"I would—"
"That's okay, go inside please, I'll be fine on my own." She winks before turning around, she's much more....confident out of her office.
✺
"This is my bedroom, just down the hall if you need anything." I say opening the door, Dorothea runs out and Josephine looks at her.
"Oh, who is this?" She bends down rubbing Dorothea.
"Dorothea, just got her over winter break." I tell Josephine and she slowly picks her up as she lets Dorothea sniff her hand.
"She is adorable." She scratches her head and I smile shutting the bedroom door slowly.
"Okay, now right down the hall is where you will be staying, you're by the bathroom which is great." I say, she stops walking and I stop looking back at her.
"Is this the bathroom?" She asks and I look at the door before shaking my head.
"Um...no—that's Natalie's bedroom for now, this is the bathroom." I walk to the next white door and she looks at me for a second before nodding.
"We're still together—we just—"
"It's normal for couples to have separate bedrooms, you don't need to explain." She tells me, I bite the inside of my mouth as I walk to the end of the hall opening the door.
This guest bedroom is bigger than the other one, it has the same light grey walls and the bed is to the left bedside a mirror in the corner of the room, there's also a painting on the wall behind the double bed in here. Then the window is right across from the door, to the right is a dresser and shelves above it with some books, including 'lasting forever'.
Natalie told me she put it in here because she finds it funny, anyone who sleeps in here and looks at the books would never expect that one of them is actually written by Natalie.
The floor in here is wooden but there's a grey rectangular rug beneath the bed, it's very big covering quite a bit of the wooden floor.
"This is your bedroom." I tell her stepping inside, she follows, putting Dorothea down.
"You have a very beautiful house." She tells me and I smile a little.
"It's Natalie's, this was all designed by her." I say and she looks around before taking her bag off her back.
"Where is Natalie?" She questions.
"At an interview, she got fired and I think that she feels like she belong in the classroom so she's doing anything to go back." I explain and she nods.
She walks over to the bookshelf examining the books, tilting her head slightly to see the titles of some.
"Has she read all of these?"
"Yeah, pretty much, this one is my favourite." I walk closer pointing at 'lasting forever', causing Josephine to glance at me.
"I've read that, it's one of my favourites actually, very well written also very interesting." She picks it up and I hold back the smile.
"You think?" I jump at Natalie's voice, we both glance over to her leaning against the doorframe with her arms crossed. She has a little smirk on her face, she knows what she's doing.
"Natalie, hello, I'm Josephine." Josephine holds the book in one hand while holding her other out to Natalie. Natalie looks her up and down.
Why now, Natalie?
"Put that back where you found it when you are finished, if you are reading any of those do not break the spine." She leans off the door frame leaving the room again. I look outside the room for a second. Natalie breaks the spines of the books she's reading...she calls people dramatic for hating when others do it, but I guess she wants everything perfect in here.
"I was not expecting that." Josephine says, clearing her throat. I look back to her.
"She just has to get used to you, she's also just not a hand shaker." I tell her and she nods slowly. She puts the book back.
"I should go talk to her actually...um, explore if you want to. I will be back soon just gotta..." I smile and she nods smiling back. I turn around walking out of the room, shutting the door behind me.
I walk down the hall to the guest bedroom where Natalie is sleeping, I knock once before opening the door a little to peak my head in.
She looks at me as she takes off her jacket, I step inside shutting the door, my back to it.
"You didn't have to be rude." I say and she laughs. She folds her jacket before she sits onto the bed.
"I wasn't rude, clearly you don't see the way she looks at you."
"She doesn't look at me in anyway." I lean off the door stepping towards her, she looks up at me, searching my eyes.
"You were talking, her eyes were on your lips, they dipped lower, I was going to get the book out of her hand and throw it at her. Be grateful all I done is look her up and down and not in the way I do to you." Natalie says and I huff.
"Her eyes weren't on—"
"You know they were."
"No I don't, Natalie. You're being weird." I raise my voice but quiet down incase Josephine can hear. Natalie stands up, stepping towards me, my eyes go to the floor.
"I don't like you being mad with me, Diana. I don't like having to sleep in the guest bedroom either when I would much rather sleep in our bedroom and make sure she doesn't try sneak in during the night." She lifts my chin and I look up meeting her eye.
"She isn't going to do that...And I keep causing arguments—I can't stop it, I just keep getting angry so I don't know what to do." I say, making myself confused.
"Let me sleep with you tonight." She whispers, kissing the side of my face, I smile a little as she starts kissing more.
"Sleep with me? What do you mean by that?" I ask and she nips at my ear making me laugh.
"I mean i want to sleep in the same bed, not whatever dirty thoughts you are having. One bit of attitude, Diana, I will push you out of the bed." She says and I smile rolling my eyes.
"Maybe I would be in a better mood if the other kind of sleeping together was what you meant." I look up at her, she looks at me for a second.
"Arguing with me one second and the next you are basically begging for me." She says and I shake my head.
"Shut up." I say pushing her a little before she pulls me against her as she leans down and kisses me.
I smile kissing her back as my mind clears, of all negative thoughts, it seems to happen every time Natalie kisses me. I haven't really had a good day with her since everything...but I'm trying, I'm going to try really hard.
She hums slipping her hand up my shirt but her hands are cold, I let out a noise and she laughs a little. I pull back quickly but stay close to her.
"I need to go check in with Josephine, can we finish this later?" I ask looking at her as I lick my bottom lip a little. She hums pressing her lips together.
"Maybe, I wouldn't want the guest to hear anything...you can be quite loud and I certainly wouldn't want her to see the marks I might leave tomorrow morning." She bites at her lip and I suck in a breath as I turn around, walking over to the door quickly before she makes me more of a mess.
A/n
Honestly dislike this chapter but it's okay...
I know that I said I had the whole story worked out but I ended up having one of my moments where I decided I hated it and I deleted all the drafts...I do know where I want it to go now but I just wrote the most chaotic chapter and I'm going to delete because it's very random and I think enough people have been harmed...
I do also know that most of you are probably shaking in your boots with fear about Josephine and Diana...I won't say anything on that...just if there's flirting we should all remember Natalie is very...protective let's go with, so there could possibly be a good outcome from it. Or something worse could happen with the attitude issues Diana's having...but I guess we will just have to wait and see. 🤷♀️