Noisy Neighbor » lee know

By may_bornmia

48.6K 2.7K 6.6K

"Why the heck do you keep blasting the music so loud?" "And why the heck do you bang your girl so loudly?" ... More

Chapter 1: Two Inches
Chapter 3: Potential P*ssies
Chapter 4: Father From Another Grandfather
Chapter 5: Hunt You Down (spoiler: it's not Alpha Chan saying this)
Chapter 6: Baldy Voldy
Chapter 7: Fitting Tampons ft. SHINee
Chapter 8: Bang Felix, Yes Or No?
Chapter 9: We're Back To The Survival Show (cries)
Chapter 10: 'Kkamer' Pissed In Jisung's Lawn
Chapter 11: Bra Sniffer
Chapter 12: G-G-G-GAY
Chapter 13: The Adventures Of Minho's Butt
Chapter 14: Jisung's Moist Humor
Chapter 15: Whaddup, Brotherend?
Chapter 16: Run! James Charles Is Here!
Chapter 17: The Author Doesn't Know What To Name This Chapter
Chapter 18: Shakespeare-sunbaenim
Chapter 19: Chrizztopher Strikes Again
Chapter 20: Johnny Jacques Fernando Chaddha Whitman
Chapter 21: Mission: Rescue Dog Kisser
Chapter 22: Almighty Hyunjin Of Hyunhyunland
Chapter 23: Super Docy-docy Shit

Chapter 2: Plant-wetter

3K 186 287
By may_bornmia

One would picture mornings to be as soothing as a song of wind chimes. Ava, too, thought that she would perhaps wake up better after sassing out the noisy neighbor the previous night, and that it would be like a scene out of a Disney movie -- the birds flying in to wake her up, and her rising and shining effortlessly beautiful. 

However... 

"YOU WET MY GRASS!" 

"I'M WATERING MY PLANTS, DUMB DUMB!" 

"MY GRASS IS FUCKING WET HERE, HAN! KEEP YOUR WATER TO YOURSELF!"

"NOT MY PROBLEM THAT YOU DON'T WATER YOUR PLANTS, HWANG!" 

"YOU MADE THIS GRASS WETTER THAN YOUR GIRL!" 

"OHHHH YOU DID NOT!" 

Ava whined, "God!" 

So it was practically next to impossible for a girl to sleep in this neighborhood. Because even though the fuckboy could quiet down sometimes, his roommate and her own roommate could not shut up. 

She heard her roommate, Hyunjin, laugh maniacally, "OH, I DID!" 

Jisung, who was Minho's roommate, "TAKE THAT FUCKING FENCE AND SHOVE IT UP YOUR POO HOLE!" 

"MY POO HOLE? BITCH, I CURSE YOU TO HAVE DIARRHEA!" 

"AND I CURSE YOU TO SHART IN YOUR PANTS!" 

"AND I CURSE YOU TO-"

Ava shot up to sit in her head, groaning, and slipping her feet into her slippers, she ran down the floor to stomp up to Hwang Hyunjin and Han Jisung. Upon her arrival, Hyunjin cried, "AVA! HE STINKS!"

"AVA!" Jisung whined, "TELL YOUR ROOMMATE TO GO BACK TO SLEEP!" 

"ME?!" Hyunjin turned to look at Jisung, as if he had attempted a criminal offense, "I DON'T SLEEP!" 

"UH HUH? NEITHER DO I!" 

"Please!" Ava grimaced, "You two keep sleeping even when that fuckboy and I yell and fight!" 

Hyunjin looked confused, "Y'all fought last night, too?"

"Oh, yeah!" Jisung laughed, "The two inches joke. You're so funny, Ava!" 

"Thanks!" the two fist-bumped. 

Hyunjin hugged Ava's shoulders, and pulled her back, and grumbled, "You're my roomie, Ava! Let that plant-wetter side with his roomie!" 

"Plant-wetter? PLANT-WETTER?" Jisung took serious offense to that, but oh, Han, that doesn't even mean anything.

"I said what I said!" Hyunjin flipped his long locks. 

Jisung, who was previously watering his plants before the drama had commenced, picked up the hose again. He pointed it at Hyunjin as if it was a gun, and Hyunjin lifted his hands up in a surrender motion as if it actually was a gun. 

"What the he-" Ava couldn't even complete when Minho emerged from the deepest pits of hell (read: his room, where the bed probably smells like a hundred girls), and groggily questioned, "What the fuck is going on here at 8 AM?" 

"Hyunjin called me a plant-wetter!" Jisung complained. 

"Uh? Because you were wetting my plants!" Hyunjin argued. 

"Dude," Minho spoke, his eyes not even fully open yet, "Let your plants get wet. At least something's getting wet at your side of the house." 

Ava gasped, "You asshole!" 

"And that's for calling me a two-inch," he smiled sarcastically. 

"Oh? So you're smaller than that?" 

Minho, like a true menace, grabbed the hose from Jisung and turned it on, aiming it at Ava. The water shot out of the water pipe as if it was a pregnant woman's water breaking (bad example but the author consumes too much caffeine), and Ava screamed as the water hit her, feeling sleepy no more. 

Hyunjin and Jisung gasped like a dramatic audience, and then Minho turned off the water. 

"YOU-" 

"And I finally made you wet," he winked at her (the audacity) and dropped the hose, locking his arms behind his head and walking back into his house. 

Ava stood there for a moment, forming an arsonist community in her head and mentally collecting all shreds of evidence of the times when Minho had been a menace -- to help her case when she would be dragged to the court for the well-deserved crime -- and she realized: he had never not been a menace. 

There was silence for a brief moment... before Hyunjin sulkily mumbled, "Now more grass is wet..." 

"UGH!" 

(a/n: i absolutely LOVE predebut hyunsung equation because even though i adore the bond they have now, bro, predebut them must have been a whole sitcom in itself 

HOW WAS THE CHAPTERRRRRR? 

thanks for reading! i love you!) 

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