The drive to school was silent.
Haechan was waiting outside Hyerim's apartment complex in the morning. The atmosphere was almost awkward, both of them saying quiet greetings before she entered the boy's car like she normally would on a Monday morning.
The walk to her locker was silent as well.
"Uh, I'm gonna...go to class," she told him, gesturing stiffly to a random direction, giving the boy a quick wave, then speeding off to Korean history before he could say anything to her, or walk her to her class.
She was anxious during class, bouncing her leg up and down before her seatmate shot her a furious glare which made her stop.
Hyerim couldn't figure out why the atmosphere became awkward all of a sudden. She thought that it was supposed to get better after confessing. What happened to the romantic dates and asking her to be his girlfriend? Was that only in the movies?
Lunch rolled around, and Haechan was waiting at Hyerim's locker as usual, his black hair falling over his forehead as he looked down at his phone.
"Haechan..." Hyerim called quietly. He looked up, giving her a smile as he shoved his phone in his pocket.
"You're here."
"Yeah." The girl bit her lip, not knowing what to say around him all of a sudden. "Um, we have lunch right?"
She cursed herself internally after saying that. Of course they had lunch together. Just like every other A week Monday.
"Uh, we should go," she said quickly, while walking away from him, eager to get the day over. She was confused. Her head hurt. She was tired.
"Hyerim, I think we should talk."
Her heart skipped a beat.
"Huh? Oh, yeah, okay. Yeah, let's...talk."
❆
They made their way to the school sport field, sitting down on the bleachers. Haechan handed her a bar he had in his pocket, and she thanked him quietly.
"I'll treat you to a meal after school."
Hyerim nodded, ripping open the bar and munching on it quietly.
There was another beat of silence.
"We should talk about last night," Haechan interrupted the silence, and Hyerim looked over to see him staring intently at her. She immediately avoided his gaze, nodding again.
"Yeah."
Why was she being so awkward?
Haechan cleared his throat, and took a deep breath, as if steeling himself to do something he didn't want to do.
"So I applied for early acceptance to Korea University, and I received a sport scholarship," Haechan revealed to her, and Hyerim's eyes lit up. She clapped excitedly, knowing how much the boy wanted this.
"See, I knew you would be accepted!"
Haechan's smile seemed forced, and when Hyerim noticed, her own smile faltered. The boy continued.
"They told me that I have to live on campus if I want the sport scholarship. It's not that I need to save the money, it just gives me extra chances for ice hockey. And you already know that I wanna go pro."
And here it went, the conversation that Hyerim was praying not to happen.
"So I need to move there after graduation. And I'll be busy with hockey practices and games 'cuz there's definitely gonna be scouts at competitions. And I gotta keep my grades up as well. So my first year will be pretty hectic. And you're gonna be busy with senior year as well, and graduation, and university applications, and everything."
Hyerim didn't like where the conversation was going.
"So what are you trying to say?" She eyed him warily, hoping for the words to not come out of his mouth.
"I don't think there's a chance of us dating."
And there it was. The words.
Hyerim had been semi-preparing herself for this, but she still didn't expect it to hurt so much. Haechan might as well have hit her in the chest with his ice hockey still, because suddenly all the air in her lungs left, and she was sitting there, winded.
There was a small part of her that was convinced that maybe, just maybe, Haechan would try for her. Maybe he would make time out of his busy sport schedule for her, and she would make time aside from studying for her CSAT for him.
But going pro was more important for him. Of course, her brain knew that. Haechan and Hyerim were very different people. Haechan was far more ambitious than she was. He had dreams to be a professional ice hockey player, to get famous. Hyerim just wanted a stable job, a quiet life and to die old with her belly full.
"Okay," she simply said, casting her eyes downwards to play with her hands again.
None of them said anything for a while, Haechan looking out at the afternoon sun over the field, Hyerim playing with her fingers and picking at her cuticles.
The electronic bell brought both of them out of their reverie.
"Let's just act like before, yeah? Friends?" Haechan asked, bending down to look at the girl still seated on the bench. Her eyes snapped up, and she hummed quietly in agreement, standing up and dusting herself off.
"I'm gonna be late for class, I'll go first," she told him, and raised her hand as a farewell before jogging away from him, pursing her lips to suppress the lump in her throat, and the welling of tears in her eyes.
❆
markiepoo
so then why would he confess to me if he was just
going to pretend like none of it ever happened?
man
i hate him so much
did he not even say anything after that?
like he just said
i dont think theres a chance of us dating
lets just act like friends
then left
i mean
i left first
but yeah
he has a massive fear of commitment
doesnt he have like 10 exes
idk maybe ur different to him
from what ive heard from jaemin n jeno
he didnt take any of them serious
they were just a quick fuck
what if i was meant to be a quick fuck
hyerim
is that why he rejected the thought of us dating so quick
he didnt have a problem with other girls
what if i was a quick fuck but then he realised i wasnt like that
so he had to get rid of me
then why would he confess
i dont fucking know
im sad
i know
what do i do
what do u want to do?
cuss him out
slap him
kill him
um
how about
go to sleep
its 2am
i cant
do u wanna call?
ok
❆
*INCOMING CALL FROM markiepoo*
"Hello?"
"Mmm."
"Are you crying?"
"No."
"I can hear you sniffling, dude."
"I'm fine."
"It's okay to be upset. I mean, he was a dickhead about it."
"Yeah. He was."
"Maybe you should distance yourself from him"
"..."
"He just told you that there was no chance of y'all being together.
And you're still going to talk to him?"
"He said to be friends."
"Yeah, but then you're never gonna move on."
"You're right."
"Hey, dude, it's okay. This was your first ever proper crush. It's
okay to be upset about it. But you can't keep moping about it."
"Uh-huh."
"You're still young, man. You'll meet loads of guys in university,
don't stress. I know it seems like a big deal right now."
"Mm-hm."
"..."
"..."
"So-"
"Sing me something."
"Uh."
"It doesn't have to be good. I just want to hear something calming."
"Uh, okay. Just warning you, my voice isn't warmed up right
now so I might sound like shit. Don't judge."
❆
There was a rustle through the other end of the phone, and a soft guitar chord strummed. Mark strummed it a few more times, probably tuning the strings, before clearing his throat, humming a few times. Hyerim set the phone next to her head on her pillow, tucking her arms under her duvet.
The opening chords of "Best Part" by Daniel Caesar reverberated through the phone speakers. His soft, husky voice sang the lyrics as he played along with his guitar.
Hyerim felt her eyelids drooping as Mark's voice lulled her to sleep.
#4 in the nctu hashtag out of 11k stories is insane, i love yall so much wtf i actually squealed when i saw it
thank you for all the love, im already on 400 reads and the story hasnt even progressed that much, thank you for all the votes, the comments the reads, all the adds to your reading lists, i appreciate every single one of you out there
i will continue the consistent updates and push out chapters for yall before i start on my other books