I'm so painfully lonely these days, tapping my phone screen every couple of seconds and hoping endlessly that a message would be there, patiently awaiting my reply.
I can't throw myself into studying like I used to, because something about it just screams wrong and grates on my nerves until I want to get out of this wretched house and run for hours, feeling the wind in my face and burn in my legs. I feel so trapped, so cooped up and imprisoned, wishing endlessly that I could just--do something, go somewhere and tip my head back and breathe.
But I can't, so I'm stuck with the freedom that the digital world offers--and the issue is that this freedom is a hundred times more addictive and a hundred times less healthy. I start watching something that makes me giggle or reading a particularly eye-catching story--and then I look up and it's 5 hours later. My assignments and work sit before me, mocking and laughing.
It's fine, you have a week more becomes you have 6 more days, you can do it which then becomes you have 3 days left, c'mon and then it's fine, I'll stay up late tonight to finish everything by tomorrow knowing exactly how impossible that is.