Song: Flawless - The neighbourhood
𝐋𝐢𝐥𝐲
𖤓𖤓𖤓
My surroundings freeze to ice, leaving me speechless in the car where I could have died just a few minutes ago. My eyes blur out everything, everything but the deadly weapon lying in-front of me.
Yet it's not fear that overcomes me, curiosity maybe?
Interest?
Without thinking, my hand comes in contact with the weapon, wrapping my hand around the handle and picking it up. I gulp as I examine it, wondering why the hell he would need a gun loose in his bag, could he be more careless?
In the corner of my eye I see his silhouette approaching the car, but it's too late for me to act like I didn't witness a murder weapon fall out of this man's bag when he opens the car door and sits down in his seat.
His mouth opens to speak, but nothing leaves his throat when he sees the item occupying my hands. His entire body stills and for the first time since I've met him he almost looks, panicked? Like he actually doesn't know what to do.
"Interesting." I mutter, repeating the words he said to me the first day we met when he found my vibrator laying proud in my drawer. I guess we're even now? I mean him finding that was definitely equally as mortifying.
"Li-"
I ignore him, placing the gun back in his bag then returning to sit comfortably in my seat.
"Lily." He starts, looking away for a second like he's trying to figure out what to say.
"Just drive. Drive and pretend this never happened. I'll go mad about it later I can't be bothered right now." I interrupt him again, exhaling as my head falls to the car window.
His unexplainable expression stays the same for a moment before he starts up the car again and drives off. "I'm not going to hurt you."
My head shoots up from the window, "what?"
"If you think I'm planning on shooting your brains out in your sleep, as tempting as it could be, I won't." He goes back to his dark and annoying self.
I roll my eyes, "gee thanks, that really helps." A pause. "Never mind, are we going to talk about how I almost just died like 5 minutes ago? It seems it slipped your mind."
"The guy was wasted, he could hardly talk but he looked pretty young so I called an ambulance for him. He should be fine."
"Hm, I didn't see you do that." I cross my arms over my chest and lean back in my seat.
He lets out a breathy chuckle, "because you were to busy playing treasure hunt in my bag."
"I'm not the one with a gun in my work bag." I snap.
"I don't use it, its just.. precautions" he says as he parks the car by my building.
I grab my bag and climb out of the car as quickly as possible, "I honestly don't care about the gun Enzo, everyone needs something to keep them safe."
He comes up on my left, arching a brow. "You have a gun?"
I snort, "something like that."
Once we're back in my apartment I go straight to the kitchen, taking out a box I've had well hidden for ages.
As I'm opening the box Enzo walks into the kitchen, his eyes locked on the grey mystery box
His eyes widen slightly when I take out the high volt taser that's laid in the same box for several years. Eventually the shocked expression on his face morphs into one with a smirk and proudness coated all over it.
"Like you said. Precautions" I breathe, looking into his deep eyes.
There's a moment of silence before I place the taser back in the box. I won't put it back in its usual spot while he watches, as much as I feel like I can trust him a little more now, I don't want him to know the location of the one thing that'll keep my safe incase something changes.
"You ever use it?" He asks, seeming full on curious.
"No. Not yet." I eye him.
"I told you... I won't hurt you." He takes a step closer to me.
"Right... as tempting as it is" I blink up at him, taking a step back when his large figure surrounds me even more.
"As tempting as it is." He repeats, his eyes bore into mine and for a second, just a second something inside me tells me that we're not talking about hurting each other anymore.
I take a deep breathe and move a few large steps away so that I can get out of this situation before it gets any more uncomfortable.
The box is still in my hands when I walk into my bedroom, locking it behind me so that I can have a few hours of relaxation.
Suddenly my breathe tightens and my clothes feel like they're sitting uncomfortably on my body, I blink and without another thought I drop my bag on my bed and strip all my clothes off.
My eyes come in contact with the full body mirror infront of me, and all off a sudden I feel way to exposed. I haven't been able to look at myself in a mirror like this in ages.
Not because I don't like my stomach, not because I hate my face, my shoulders, hips, thighs and legs.
But because of the sharp scars that paint them.
My thighs and wrists both equally coated in my deadly thoughts that disguise as the aftermath of slicing through my delicate skin.
I shiver, and almost run away from the mirror that I once felt confident posing in. I walk into my bathroom instead, turning on the water to the perfect temperature. I realize my mistake when the hot droplets fall onto my sensitive skin and I wince. Pain sours through my body when I look down at the fresh scars that are displayed uglily on my thighs.
The stinging hurts like a bitch at first, the boiling water gliding uncomfortably through it, however as the minutes passes by it slowly evens out until eventually all I can feel is a numbness. They're swollen and a thick red, I know I shouldn't be so careless when it comes to things like these, I'm a law student I should know better.
But it's not always so easy.
I'm so deep embedded into my thought I don't even realize how long it's passed since I walked into the bathroom. My fingertips feel like raisins and my legs feel stiff for standing up for so long. I turn off the water and dry myself, smothering my body with lotion and applying an oil to my scars. Wrapping a towel around by body I walk out of the bathroom, shivering at the sudden cold breeze so I quickly change into a hoodie and sweats that I know I'll have to take off later because no matter how cold it is there's no way I could ever sleep in clothes that thick.
My stomach grumbles, what have I even ate today? I exit my bedroom with a simple plan to make some noodles, a plan that of course fails when I see Enzo cooking, in my kitchen, his dress shirt opened allowing me to see his muscular chest.
I gulp, not really knowing what to do so I slowly take a step back, hoping he won't notice I'm here
"Come here." He says, his focus still plastered on the pasta he's making.
"What?" I blink, trying to move my gaze from his thick veiny hand wrapped around the wooden spoon. Wait what?
"Lily, come here." He repeats, his voice deep and commanding as always.
I do as he says for some reason, and I walk up next to him. "Hm?"
He stops stirring the pasta and puts the spoon away, before I know it he's turned around and pinned me against the cabinet.
His hands are placed firmly on each side of me locking me in place. I look up at him with an annoyed expression.
Seriously?
"The fuck?" My confused expression hardening.
"What's wrong with you?" He asks, like it's a complete normal question.
"Nothing wrong with me you idiot, get off me!" I punch against his chest, gritting my teeth.
"Yeah? I don't believe you."
Instead of letting me go he leans in even closer.
"Okay? You want a fucking cookie? What do you want me to do about it?" I snap, leaning back because having the man mere inches from your face is not rather pleasant. His face is scary, it doesn't even look real.
I mean perfectly messy black hair, dark green eyes, a scar that sits perfectly across his left eyebrow and another one across his lip. Likes he was designed for a movie.
"Did someone do something?" His voice cuts in.
"...yes." I admit, looking innocently up at him.
I can feel his protectiveness grow instantly like a fucking dog hearing commotion outside the door. "Who? What did they do to you?"
"..it was a man." I look away and blink back some small tears.
His knuckles tighten but he remains calm, waiting for me to talk. "Lily."
"I hardly know him and he..." I sniff. "He broke into my apartment and refuses to fucking leave!" I push against his chest and his shock lets me.
Without another word I grab a plate, serve myself some pasta and sit down by the table, digging into the food.
"That's not funny." He rasps, watching me from the same spot.
"Really?" I look up at him, my fork stopping kissy to my mouth. "I find it hilarious." The fork is placed into my mouth and the delicious food almost melts in my mouth.
This time the man doesn't take my shit instead walks up to me, grabs my plate and holds it in the air. My mouth falls open, "seriously!?"
"Tell me whats going on with you, and don't play that shit with me." He says.
I stand up with a groan, trying to snatch my plate back but it only makes him lift it higher.
"What are you 5?" I argue with a hard frown.
He only smirks, "so?"
"It's just the test, jeez. I'm worried about it. If I don't do well I'll never make it as a lawyer. Okay?" I stop trying to catch the plate, looking at him instead.
He stays still for a few seconds, likes he's trying to find out if I'm lying or not m.
Technically I'm not, I am worried about my exam but for the most part I cannot bear having to go through the rest of this term with Seb messing around.
His other hand goes to my chin, gently cupping it so that I'm looking deeply into his eyes. His thumb embraces my cheek twice. Then moves to the corner of my mouth where he wipes what I'm guessing must be some pasta sauce.
His hand leaves my chin but instead of wiping his hand off he reaches it to his mouth, licking off the residue.
My mouth falls open, "that's disgusting, what-" he sets the plate down before I get to finish. Then leaves the room.
What just happened?
𖤓𖤓𖤓