The days crawled by so slowly, it was as if time wasn't moving at all. Yet around them, the world was still moving and everyone was getting about their day. Zayden hadn't switched his phone back on, still not in the mood to speak to anyone, and Onyx only kept his switched on in case his mother called. They didn't watch TV or go on any devices, completely shutting the outside world out. They knew their friends were worried but couldn't bring themselves to face anyone, only leaving the house to go to the hospital or grocery shop.
The test results had come back, a kind doctor carefully breaking it to them that their father was indeed brain dead. They could do nothing but keep him alive...it was up to the family to choose if they wanted to turn off life support and bid him goodbye.
Since learning this, Onyx had become completely numb. He knew he was hurting somewhere and there were plenty of tears waiting to fall but he had shut it out, not wanting to feel anything. Zayden cried a lot despite trying not to and Onyx couldn't do anything apart from staying by his side. Maybe that was enough. Maybe it wasn't.
How were they supposed to accept the truth if it was this painful?
****
Another week passed before Onyx finally mustered the courage to call his friends. They answered immediately and the line was silent as he figured out what to say. They must know everything by now; their parents would've told them.
"Onyx?" Zephyr called gently. "You there?"
"How are you doing?" Fawn asked followed by Emmeryn's "Do you need us to bring anything over?"
Hearing their voices again was something he didn't realise he needed and he let out a sigh of relief. "...I'm okay...just talk to me about anything...please."
So Emmeryn spoke about her job, Zephyr shared silly stories of his escapades with Amiri and Fawn told him about different books she'd been reading.
He listened intently as they distracted him, getting lost in their stories and pretending it was just a normal evening with Zayden getting up to his own things and his parents on their way home from work. No one was dying and no one was grieving. Everything was all good.
The call came to an end, with it his fantasy, and he realised he needed to reply to his uni friends too. He'd not yet told them what had happened; they'd probably seen the news but weren't aware the couple in question were his parents.
Opening the group chat, he hesitated before typing out a message.
Onyx: I'm sorry for vanishing but there's something I need to tell you all. Have you all seen the news? It was my parents in the car crash...
Did that sound too blunt and unemotional? How else was he supposed to say it though? Closing his eyes and taking a deep breath, he pressed the send button and waited.
Words of shock then concern and support filled his screen. He could imagine some of typing rapidly and multiple messages came through while others thought out their words carefully, typing for a long time before sending. Reading them all, a smile curled his lips despite the numbness he was feeling.
Onyx: my mum broke her arm and got some bruises but is otherwise fine
Onyx:...but my dad...
Onyx: the crash was really bad and he's...
He couldn't type it out for what felt like an eternity, not wanting it to be real. Was his father really gone? Just like that? Seeing him in the hospital, he only coped by pretending he was sleeping and not relying on a machine to stay alive. He thought of the morning his parents had left to go to Leicester. They had said their goodbyes with smiles on their faces and promises to return quickly and safely. He never thought that would've been the final goodbye. Never thought that would've been the last time he saw his father's smiling face looking at his sons with so much love. If he'd known this would happen, would he had done anything differently? Would he have stopped them from leaving?
Swallowing back the pain threating to crash through his numbness, he eventually typed it.
Onyx: he's brain dead
There. Now he'd admitted it. Now it was real. He couldn't deny it any longer. Not wanting to see their replies, he tossed his phone aside and curled up, burying his face in his knees as the pain broke through and tears gushed out like a waterfall.
His father was gone and not coming back.