In the Campus Burger, a Harlan Ellison fan ridicules a group of students who are reading H.P. Hatecraft's book "Char Gar Gothakon: The Beast That Hath No Name".
Male 1: "The Shrieking Madness of Char Gar Gothakon: The Beast That Hath No Name?" You're actually reading this?
Male 2: The professor is a great writer. His stuff is spooky.
Male 1: Hatecraft is a total fake. He says he's just writing what demons from dark dimensions tell him. Please!
Male 2: How do you know they're not true? Um, because I have a brain? Wait until Harlan Elison speaks here next week. He's a real writer. He'll set you bozos straight about Hatecraft. Later.
He walks out to the car park.
Male 1: "Char Gar Gothakon: The Beast That Hath No Name." How can Professor Hatecraft name the creature in the title then say it has no name. Ridiculous.
He then smells something.
Male 1: Oh! What is that smell?
He looks around and sees nothing and he continues to walk as a silhouette approaches him. He turns and sees Char Gar Gothakon. It lets out a massive scream knocking away everything as the student runs away.
Male 1: Oh! Please! Stop!
He then gets launched in the air and lands on a car as Char Gar Gothakon approaches him.
Male 1: Please. Please! No!
Char Gar Gothakon attacks him.
At Darrow University, Barty and Nan Blake drop Daphne off.
Barty: Now, Daphne, chin up. Spending some time away from your little mystery club will do you some good.
Nan: Stop by the building we paid for and if you see any professors remind them your sisters all graduated from Darrow University by the time, they were thirteen.
Daphne: I'm only visiting this school because you want me to, mom. What if Darrow isn't for me?
Nan: A college good enough for the other Blake girls isn't good enough for you? Oh, Daphne. Sometimes I wish we would have had a boy.
Daphne exits the car. Mayor Jones drops Fred off.
Mayor Jones: Fred, go straight to my old fraternity and drop my name. They have to let you in. No matter how much you talk about traps.
Fred: Man, it feels weird being here without the gang. Things sure have been pretty rough since Shaggy and Velma broke up.
Mayor Jones: By Grabthar's hammer, Fred! The Roger's kid chose a dog over a girl. What's he thinking? This isn't some reality show. Now, I've dreamed of the day you'd be humiliated by my fraternity. Don't blow this for me.
Angie Dinkley drops Velma off.
Velma: I can't believe I'm here the same day as my favorite author. Do you think Harlan Ellison will sign all my copies of his books?
Angie: I knew Harlan back in the day. Just tell him Cape Cod Dinkley sent you. He'll sign.
Colton Rogers drops Shaggy and Scooby off.
Shaggy: But, like, the best thing about Darrow University is the burger place on campus. They're known everywhere for their burgers.
Scooby: And, their French Fries, onion rings, and shakes.
Colton: Try not to embarrass us, please. Better yet, just don't tell them your last name.
Y/N's siblings drop him off.
Y/N: Why am I here, exactly?
B/N: We applied you to Darrow University to get an education.
Y/N: And you didn't tell me this because?
S/N: We wanted to surprise you.
Y/N sighs and gets out as the gang looks at each other as their parents, and Y/N's siblings drive off. They then walked off without saying a word. Fred arrives at Mu Gamma Tau Fraternity. He knocks on the door as someone answers.
Rhino: Mu Gamma Tau. Mu, are you?
Fred: Uh, hi. I'm Fred Jones Jr. My dad was a Mu Gamma toe-uh, tau-uh, toe.
Rhino: Fred! I'm Rhino.
Fred and Rhino do a handshake.
Rhino: Guys, this is Fred Jones Jr. His dad was Mu legend, Fred Jones.
All: What?
Jock 1: I thought Fred Jones was a myth.
Jock 2: I heard he ate a live bear.
Fred: So, uh, what do you guys do here? Study? Party? Make traps?
Rhino: Amateur hour. When you're in college, male, and ripped there's only one thing to do. Wrestle!
Two jocks began to wrestle.
Rhino: Go get him, Randy.
Jock 2: Yeah!
Daphne along with Y/N arrives at the Blake Family Centre for Self-Named Buildings. They both had the same class together.
Daphne: "The Blake Family Center For Self-Named Buildings."
Y/N: Try saying that ten times fast.
They entered and looked around until they saw a group of revolutionaries protesting against something.
Ernesto: No longer will they ignore your people! Are you with me?
All: Fight! Fight! Fight!
Ernesto then looks at Daphne and Y/N.
Ernesto: Are you with me?
Y/N: Yeah?
All: Fight! Fight! Fight! Fight!
Daphne and Y/N chant as well but when they are gone, they stop.
Daphne: What are we fighting?
Y/N: No clue.
Shaggy and Scooby visit the Campus Burger.
Shaggy: Right there it is, Scoob! I can already taste the legends.
Scooby: Burgers, fries, onion rings!
They then enter and look at the menu.
Shaggy: Wow! We're really here. Ahem. Uh, bring us, like, your most famous food, please. It's the way I always dreamed it.
Scooby: It's the way I've always smelled it.
The waitress comes back with hamburgers, and they eat it but soon stops.
Shaggy: These aren't burgers.
Waitress: We changed management last week. Now we're organic vegan. Those are pureed sprouts and wheat gluten.
Shaggy and Scooby spit out the food. Velma attends a lecture by Harlan Ellison.
Harlan: And that's why there hasn't been anything good written since the 1970s.
Everyone claps.
Harlan: Thank you. Okay, questions.
A student raises his hand and gets up.
Howard: My name is Howard. E. Roberts and my favorite writer is one of our professors and I was wondering if you could compare your work to his masterpiece "The Shrieking Madness of Char Gar Gotha-"
Harlan: You mean H. P. Hatecraft. An interesting scribbler, yes, no doubt. But minor. And that's being kind.
Howard: That's not true. He- he's a brilliant writer who understands the dark creatures of other dimensions.
Harlan: I perceive in you, young sir now who hears nothing but the sound of the wind blowing across an empty desert that lies between your ears.
Everyone laughs at Howard.
Harlan: Hatecraft is, at best a literary fraud, a con man. At worst, a dirt smear in the diaper of literature.
They clap as Howard walks off. Soon after everyone got their books signed.
Velma: Mr. Ellison?
Harlan: Yes, yeah... I-I can only sign so fast.
Velma: Velma Dinkley, sir. I'm a huge fan of your work and the themes you explore in-
Harlan: Dinkley? not by happy chance a relation to Cape Cod Dinkley? An old friend of mines?
Velma: My mother.
Harlan: Oh, Holy Bradbury. You must give her a kiss for me. And thank her for the chicken soup.
Velma: Jinkies! I will! It was great meeting you. Thanks so much.
Harlan: My pleasure. Oh, by the way, jinkies is not actually a word.
Night came and Harlan was walking to his car.
Harlan: Hatecraft this, Hatecraft that- Perhaps someone could ask me about my own latest work once in a while.
A silhouette passes him as Harlan smells something and the monster, Char Gar Gothakon screeches at him, knocking him and his backwards. Char Gar Gothakon then approaches him. Fred was in the house watching his roommates wrestle as he heard someone screaming.
Fred: Sounds like someone's in trouble.
Harlan: Help! Help! Someone please help me, already! Help!
The entire gang hears the cry for help as they run out to the parking lot and see Harlan getting chased by Char Gar Gothakon. Tentacles wrap around Harlan and hold him in the air.
Shaggy: Zoink! I've changed my mind! Maybe that food is not so bad!
Y/N grabs them as Char Gar Gothakon throws Harlan and lets out a screech onto the gang as they take cover. They look and Char Gar Gothakon disappears.
Velma: Mr. Ellison, are you okay?
Harlan: Okay? I've been violated by a figment of a fantasist's fabricated falsehood for the soul function of fame and fortune.
Shaggy: Oh, like, that's a lot of fa-fa-fuss.
Harlan: Really? Is it like that? What if, like, like, were used in like, its proper grammatical form and not, like as a conversational pause, like, every third, like, word?
He walks off.
Y/N: Damn.
Shaggy: Boy, what got him so upset?
Velma: Maybe he wouldn't be so mad if he saw this. A copy of Hatecraft's book. "Char Gar Gothakon: The Beast That Hath No Name".
Daphne takes the book.
Daphne: Someone's read this a lot. There's all kinds of sentences underlined. And it smells like old clam chowder being gargled by a seal.
Shaggy: But why would a monster carry a book about himself around with him?
Velma: I want to meet this Professor Hatecraft for myself.
They all go and arrive at Professor Hatecraft's house. Y/N knocks on the door.
Y/N: Hello, Professor Hatecraft? Are you home?
They enter and look around.
Y/N: Where is he?
The house inside has not been clean collecting dust.
Shaggy: With all these books, you'd think this guy could, like, afford a maid.
Shaggy and Scooby saw a statue and screamed. They run but get caught in webs and fall to the ground.
Velma: It's just a statue, beef brains. Of a character from another one of Hatecraft's books.
They enter the library and see Hatecraft sitting on his chair.
Woman on TV: Breaking news. This just in. Campus police say they have no leads on today's theft of the Darrow family archives from the university library.
Y/N: Professor Hatecraft?
Hatecraft: Oh, by the tendrils of Shap-Shap Sumagurath, you frightened me.
Velma: We're sorry, professor. We're big fans who wanted to meet you.
Hatecraft: Well, now's a good time. It's like the wrath of Fung Fard Hargenflog has descended upon me. I hope I haven't unleashed Char Gar Gothakon on the world.
Daphne: What do you mean?
Hatecraft: My work translating the demon-summoning chants written in these evil tomes which my student assistant alphabetizes for me.
Shaggy: You think, like, everything you're writing is actually happening?
Hatecraft: Dark forces are at work here in this very home! And I fear I may have inadvertently opened a portal to an alternate dimension.
Scooby: That's bad, right?
Hatecraft: Stop! You might accidentally unleash another demon.
Hatecraft goes to Y/N who has a book, and he takes it.
Hatecraft: Oh. That's just fan mail. Never mind.
Velma: A lot of these seems to be in the same handwriting.
Hatecraft: My fans are very dedicated. Now, if you will excuse me, I sense messages from another universe coming on.
They leave.
Fred: Well, what do you say, gang? Do we stay together and keep working to solve this mystery?
No one answers and they all walk away.
Fred: Is that a no?
Hatecraft watches all this from a window. Shaggy and Scooby return to Campus Burger.
Velma: What are you doing here? This place is vegan.
Shaggy: There's nowhere else to eat for, like, miles.
Scooby: Yeah. We're so hungry, we'd even eat vegetables.
Fred comes in wrestling his roommate.
Fred: Sorry. My friend were, uh, wrestling.
They look and see Fred's other friends wrestling.
Fred: My new brothers are gonna teach me a move called Happy Tapioca. I don't know what it is, but apparently, uh I'll be blindfolded and submerged in pudding. See ya around.
The group walks out as Velma looks at Scooby and Shaggy and they walk away and sit down. The waitress comes and gives them food. Scooby sniffs it and sticks his tongue out in disgust.
Shaggy: You said it, Scoob. And pass the salt.
The lights flicker as a wall explodes by Char Gar Gothakon.
Scooby and Shaggy: Char Gar Gothakon!
Char Gar Gothakon grabs a waiter.
Shaggy: Like, run!
Char Gar Gothakon spins and throws the waiter. He roars destroying the place as Shaggy grabs Velma and the three run out of the building.
Velma: Just because I'm letting you save me doesn't mean I forgive you!
Fred was being hung by the hands as Scooby tackled him. Daphne and Y/N were together.
Y/N: So, who are we going after next?
Ernesto: don't worry, Comrade Y/N. Our true calling will present itself soon. In the meantime, pick something from the list of protestable. It's fun.
Y/N and Daphne look.
Daphne: Rice crackers, Shawarma, old person smell?
Y/N: Wait, can we even protest about that?
Ernesto: I don't know. But someone should!
Suddenly Fred grabs Y/N and Scooby grabs Daphne as they run. Hatecraft watches them with binoculars. The gang runs into him.
Velma: Professor Hatecraft, you have to run! Char Gar Gothakon is at the campus burger! Wait. Were you spying on us?
Hatecraft: Yes.
Y/N: Stalker alert.
Hatecraft: I wanted to see if you were telling the truth. And by the talons of Feng Shui Nabiscus. You were! I have no choice now but to reveal the terrible dark truth about Char Gar Gothakon.
They gasp as Y/N yells.
Y/N: Called it!
Everyone assembled in a class as Hatecraft addressed the crowd.
Hatecraft: I know you've heard the rumors of a sighting on campus last night of a monster from one of my novels. But I want to set the record straight. My writings, as Mr. Ellison said the other day are a fraud. There is no Char Gar Gothakon. I made the whole thing up!
Howard: It can't be true! Who is forcing you to lie like this, Professor Hatecraft?
Hatecraft: This is not a lie. I am telling the truth. I perpetuated the myth to sell books... and to gain access to the lucrative world of plush monster toys. I am so sorry.
Ernesto: Ignore him! We are the ones telling the truth! Monster deserve equality. Char Gar Gothakon should not be silenced. And here's a song to tell you why.
They began to play as the gang watched.
Shaggy: Like, now what do we do? No one's listening to a word we say.
Y/N: You gotta admit though, it's catchy.
Fred: There's only one thing we can do. Build a trap! And I can't do it alone.
Suddenly the lights went out.
Student 1: What's going on?
Char Gar Gothakon then drops to the ground.
Ernesto: Uh, I think we made our point. The protest is over!
They run as Char Gar Gothakon lets out a screech around the room.
Fred: So, what do you say, gang? Are we going to solve this mystery or not?
Char Gar Gothakon kidnapped Hatecraft and runs off as the gang chases them in the rain. Char Gar Gothakon takes Hatecraft to his house.
Hatecraft: Somebody save me!
The gang goes inside and looks for Hatecraft.
Velma: Professor Hatecraft?
Hatecraft: Help!
Fred: We'll never find him if we don't split up.
Y/N, Fred, and Daphne ran off.
Shaggy: Okay. I guess that means we go... Huh?
Scooby and Velma were gone.
Shaggy: Oh, come on.
Fred looks around.
Feed: Wow! I can't wait to be an adult. You get to have so much cool stuff that has awesome old person smell.
Daphne gives Fred a hook.
Daphne: Here. You might need this for the trap.
Fred: Great find, Daph. Hey, you know, the three of us make a pretty good team, don't we?
Y/N: Well, I can guess what you're thinking.
Fred: What?
Y/N: Nothing. Your mind is a complete void of anything, including a brain.
Fred: Hey, you're right!
Y/N slaps himself and looks at Daphne.
Y/N: See what I mean?
Scooby and Velma were walking together and realized Shaggy was gone.
Velma: I thought Shaggy was right behind us.
Scooby: Huh? You worried?
Velma: Oh, who am I kidding? It's like he's a part of me. Even though he left me for... you.
Scooby: I'm sorry.
Shaggy: Scooby! Velma! Help!
Velma: It's Shaggy!
They run towards Shaggy as Shaggy is curled up as the gang sees him.
Shaggy: Something jumped off the shelf at me and had, like, a tentacle.
They move a vase and see a backpack.
Fred: It's not a tentacle. It's a strap for someone's book bag.
Velma takes a book out and goes through the pages.
Velma: They look like stories. Listen to this title. "The Dread Beast Goo-Goo Gaga."
Fred sniffs the bag.
Fred: Ew! Yuck! they've got that same smell. It's like a baboon smoking a cigar while bathing in a bath of moldy tuna and curled ranch dressing.
Y/N: Let me see that.
Y/N sniffs it.
Y/N: Ew! It smells like when Fred's brain actually works and not thinking of traps.
Male 1: Hey! Let me out of here!
Y/N kicks the door open and sees a classmate running out hugging Y/N.
Male 1: Thank goodness! Trapped inside with all of Hatecraft's lousy books it's like being in a version of the underworld.
Velma: Who put you in there?
Male 1: The guy with all the tentacles. What's his name?
Hatecraft: Char Gar Gothakon! Stay away, you demon!
Fred: The professor!
The gang ran onto the rooftop and saw Char Gar Gothakon about to throw hatecraft off the roof.
Hatecraft: Help! Help! Help me!
They climb up.
Fred: We've got to distract it.
Velma: Hatecraft's monsters are only summoned by chanting. Follow me.
They climb up but Scooby and Shaggy sneak off. The gang began to chant Char Gar Gothakon.
Hatecraft: Don't chant at it, hit it!
Char Gar Gothakon screeches at the four as Y/N grabs Daphne's hand stopping her from falling off the roof. Char Gar Gothakon throws Hatecraft off, but Scooby grabs him as he is held by Shaggy, Fred, Y/N, Velma, and Daphne. Char Gar Gothakon nearly fell off the roof itself.
Char Gar Gothakon: Help!
Char Gar Gothakon falls but Hatecraft grabs it. The gang pulls them up.
Shaggy: Like, you don't hear many monsters from other dimensions scream for help.
Char Gar Gothakon was about to screech but Fred wrapped his ascot around its tentacles.
Velma: This is no monster.
The monster is revealed to be Howard.
Velma: It's Howard E. Robert! Hatecraft's student assistant and biggest fan. Just as I suspected.
Shaggy: Suspected how?
Velma: Think about it. We found a book written by Hatecraft with sentences underlined that smell like Char Gar Gothakon.
Howard: Of course, it was me, someone had to defend the professor against his critics. And what better way than to dress as his greatest creation? Fortunately, I'd taken a class in the military application of sonic shriek technology at the learning annex. Although, in retrospect it might not have been a good idea to glue real octopus legs to my face.
All: Ah, so that was the smell!
Velma: But when Hatecraft admitted he made it up?
Howard: That's when he had to fall. And he would have, too, if it weren't for the dark elder forces conspiring in the inky black of time most foul! Oh. And you meddling kids.
Howard is then taken away. Harlan comes around the corner.
Harlan: H.P, are you all right?
Hatecraft: Harlan. Yes. Just an overedge fan who got carried away.
Harlan: Fans. Imbeciles fit only to be gnawed by rabid rats.
Hatecraft: Yes. Someone could write a book.
Harlan: How about, "A Boy And His Fans By Harlen Ellison and H.P. Hatecraft?"
Hatecraft: I was thinking something more along the lines of "Shavu-ra hatafar. The Fan That Hath No Name."
Harlan: Except, uh, you just named it.
Hatecraft: Don't start with me, Ellison.
They both walk away into the house. The gang returns to the campus and goes towards the Mystery Machine.
Daphne: You know, I'm glad we don't have to go to college just yet.
Fred: Yeah, it'll be great to go home. And back to solving mysteries.
Scooby: As a team?
Fred: Absolutely. The way it should be.
He opens the fan and sees the Darrow family archives.
Daphne: Darrow University library Darrow Family archives? Wait. Aren't those the archives the news said were stolen?
Velma picks up a letter from Mr. E.
Shaggy: Mr. E! Huh. Open it.
Scooby: Carefully.
Velma opens it and reads the letter.
Velma: "If the first Mystery Inc. had what's inside the trunk maybe they never would have vanished in the first place."
Fred opens it and it was documents and pictures showing the history of Crystal Cove, with records relating to the Darrow's.
Fred: This looks like the entire history of Crystal Cove.
Velma: Gang, I think one mystery just turned into two.
Y/N: Wait, there's more on the back of the paper.
Velma turns the paper around and reads it.
Velma: "And Y/N, in every family, there are secrets buried deep within, waiting to be uncovered. The truth may hurt, but it's the only way to heal."
Daphne: What could that mean?
Y/N: I don't know.
They all look at each other.