I feel weakened by my own salvation.
Rotten Shreds.
Death Fails me.
My death is me. It's intimate and it's personable. It's mine to mourn, and I was mindlessly interrupted as I awoke the next morning. None other than by Inej and Kael arguing and disrupting into their own nastiness and bitters.
I'm hungry, but that had been an empty void hollowing my rotten flesh. It is truly mortifying to be the only one who remembers such marrow. My memory became my own filthy and harrowing punishment. I didn't want it.
I sat at my table, groggily observing as Kael spiraled into a sort of chaos. He spat gruelingly through his sharp edged teeth, strikingly yelling towards his sister. They were constantly at one another throats.
"You have lost the key?" He bared his teeth, ripping his own flesh apart, as some sort of ritual to prove how evil he truly was.
I didn't flinch. His usual antics was his own business. I was simply an unknowing audience as he forgets my presence and aims all vulgar insults towards Inej.
Inej stalked around my quarters. And while she was backtracking and explaining herself to her brother, she was damn near judging and cruelly prying at my embedded details. She always was a greedy fool.
She smugly grinned, following in Kael's footsteps as they lightly treaded in an agonizing circle.
"Oh, please," she huffed greatly, "ever think it was your own wrong doing?"
Kael sped towards Inej, locking his hand around her neck and slamming her hard against the wall. He wasted no time in braising his knuckles along the trail of her tainted blood.
"How would that be? I gave it to you last!"
Inej growled, tearing herself away from the goopy wallpaper and stalking closer.
"No, you didn't," she chuckled with a hunched furrow forward.
He eyes her curiously, almost like he had regretted his rashness.
"One of her maidens had it last... and now," her eyes trailed to me, as though she were trying to get a reaction out of me, "she is nowhere to be found."
Inej craned her neck to the side, inspecting and observing me. I didn't dare move. If it was true, the words she had uttered, that my maiden was missing, I would be devastatingly heartbroken by that thought. In true fashion though, I gave her no emotion. Too void of it all.
Kael was furious, but he didn't seek for answers, he only glared at me. Both wanted a reaction, but I never gave in. I avoided such stares and trudged my sight through the door behind them. I was ready for my freedom of the day.
He maneuvered, bending down with his hand caressing my knee. His touch was sickly and I was nearly blinding myself as I didn't blink from his suddenness. I felt the tears prickling and probing my senses, but I didn't break even.
"Darling," he soon moved his hand and trailed it up my body, moving my curls from my frame to get a good grip on my attention, "Do you happen to know where the key is?"
My eyes didn't linger. Not to say I was terrified, but I was surely uncomfortable by such presence. He was awfully tedious and I felt my quarters suffocating in on me. To be one of obeisance, I shook my head. I didn't know where the key had been.
He didn't seem to care for my answer. I winced, already recalling the fist full of hair he curled into his fateful touch as he tauntingly lured me into his vicinity.
"You know I don't like it when you lie," he tsk'd. I could feel myself losing control, the water works in a beginning cycle of pain.
My bottom lip trembled and quivered, I hated feeling my body be so detached from my mind. He did not delve deeper into the depths of my suffering.
I pierced an ugly cry as I spoke, "I swear, I know nothing about the whereabouts of the key."
To an unlikely extent, Inej pried Kael's furious fingers away from my hair. She appeared just as surprised as I did, with the notion of such guidance.
"She said she knows nothing, you are wasting your time!"
With my free hand, I combed my chestnuts back, choking out a cough as I cleared my tears. They didn't dare deserve to see me at such a weakness.
Kael pushed Inej, knocking her over some of my furniture, seething through his teeth, he withers back and snaps my hand into his direction. He held a sturdy grip along my jaw, piercing his devious eyes into mine. I panicked, as my heart sank by the motion.
I felt my eyes dilate, losing full focus as he spoke in a tongue that seemed calming, but I knew that wasn't the case.
"Benedetta, tell me where the key is, or so help me, you'll be wishing for your life to end!"
I feared Kael in that moment. My strength of power held wits over others, but with him, I lost everything.
I cried, shivering intensely, "I don't know, I don't have it."
Once more, Inej ripped Kael off, slamming him against the door as it bursts open. Inej grew tired of Kael's petty attempts and attacks, she did not like the power hungry brother he had become. She loathed it.
"You and your foolish antics are going to ruin everything we have done here! Don't you understand that?"
Inej's face reddened in fury. I noticed her rounded and balled fists, she wanted to beat Kael back into the man he was before vampirism. I hadn't known who they were before then.
Kael was steady with his steps, already back on his feet as he plunged through the threshold, knocking his sister back down. It was clear he was always needing the gloating and pride of his vicious vindications.
Twisting her hand back, Inej yelped in a hissing format as she blocks Kael's insufferable features away with the palm of her free hand. They looked awfully pathetic.
"Everything we have done? This was my idea, from start to finish!" He screamed in her face, removing her hand and tossing her to the side as blood ran down her forehead.
If I hadn't known better, I would've sensed the ricocheting tears threatening Inej's water line. She had been the more sensitive one out of the bunch.
Though, before Inej could rebuild her strength and cop an attitude, my eyes widened to the sound of my maidens tone. Her voice frail and mellow as she cowered over the two with keys dangling in her grasp. Inej held back a grin, whereas Kael avoided eye contact all together.
He was humiliated and embarrassed. He knows better than to lose his temper as such, especially around me. It was a weakness of his.
"My apologies," my maiden bowed, motioning her head nod towards Inej and Kael, "my duties got the best of me."
Kael scowled as he glared a burning flame through the maiden. Inej repositioned herself as if to reflect her brothers intimidation. Unluckily for both, I was not bothered by either.
I smiled, it was sore and weak, but a promising one as I watched her slip the key into the lock and loosely shake the chains off my wrist. I muttered a quiet voice of gratitude as she politely nodded.
As I brought my hand closer to my other, soothingly remedying the aches, my head snaps towards the door, as my maiden stalks closer to Kael, who appears flustered and frustrated.
"Where were you?" He stood up straight, acting as if he wasn't just at his sisters throat. Mistakenly assuming Inej had lost the key.
My maiden followed in similar relations, feeling his watchful scorn bury deep within her features. Her confidence surely betrays her, but covers it up intelligently as she spoke with such high graces.
"Preparing breakfast," her eyes reach mine, "for majesty Benedetta and the Mikaelsons."
Her hands rested softly in front of her, the circle of keys within her grasp as Kael promptly nodded and looked between her and I. I couldn't comprehend his expressions. Not like he would allow me to anyways.
"Ahh," he ponders of a moment, a great sigh releasing as he pointedly glances at his sister, "then we mustn't keep them waiting."
Kael held a sinister smile. I knew of his weirdly and odd demeanors as moods shifted, but he knew better than to cause a mishap and panic within my corridors with visitors. He couldn't have been that daft.
His eyes wither straight into mine, Inej crawling over to me as she guides me to my feet. I didn't necessarily dislike Inej, she could be sweet when she felt underestimated, something her brother couldn't quite sympathize with. I gave her a promising nudge as I walked over towards Kael, his gaze lingering and following me.
As Inej left the room, I felt my hand twist behind my back as Kael halted me from further steps. Not allowing my breathing to reach high capacities, I rake my vision towards him, lightly fluttering my eyes as he spoke dauntingly.
"Let's not mention our deal in front of the visitors, sha'll we?"
I nodded my head vigorously. I didn't understand his constant paranoia. He was on edge, always. Ever since I agreed upon the Mikaelsons arrival, his ego has become bruised and weakened. He cruelly felt threatened by my visitors. And I quite enjoyed that emotion that pinched from his insides out.
He was a boy of cruel intentions, and I desired for everyone to notice that without my mouth. Though, the Mikaelsons appeared far too smart for Inej and Kael. And honestly, their intelligence progressively surpassed my own.
I winced as he tightened his grip along my wrist, he wanted a verbal response. He did always demand such a respect, but I didn't think he deserved it. Though, I was a hungry fool and didn't want to keep my guests waiting any further.
"I sha'll not."
Easily enough, he ripped his hand away from my being and promptly escorted me out of my premises. I walked with grace, head held high and hands around my back as I headed towards my breakfast feast. I gulped nervily, I knew my guests only devoured and survived off of blood.
I did not want to be served as their breakfast.
୨ৎ
Much to my surprise, my grand room was full and inviting. It wasn't swarmed and rotten to the ghastly color of carnage. It didn't smell horrid and it was pleasantly quiet with lingering smiles upon my arrival. But even then, a sour taste was left in my mouth. What was their motivate?
I circled around, nodded my head towards my maidens and swirled a pretty-toothy smile towards my guests. I may have lingered a smile for far too long, as Elijah pulled out the chair beside him. I stood frozen as I watched his movements.
He was brisk and swift, his reaction time was unearthly and quite unexpected. I haven't spoken to Elijah much, but that had been due to my own rules. I glimmered in the satisfaction that he respected me enough not to speak.
Normally, and with my husband (though, no more), I'm sitting at the end of the table and observing as the other feasts. Small talk here and there, but nothing abnormal or loud.
Much to Elijah's dishonor, I shook my head and pointedly angled myself to be opposite of him. I wasn't ready to propose myself in a way that appeared inappropriate or immoral. While he was handsome, my betraying eyes needed to revoke his needy ambushes. I had no time to frolic around with vampire business.
I felt eyes on me, all around too. Everywhere I glanced, I noticed the bunch glancing at me. Their stares weren't harsh, nor were they gentle. But they were certainly curious. I'm sure they want to get to know me more, but I simply do not want vampire friends. I don't need more burdens and frustrations.
As I sat head of the table, I bowed my head, courtesy of my guests and myself. Inej and Kael wander around the room, making no attempt at motioning towards the table. Surely, there was enough space, but the pair of siblings were quite strange in those aspects. They hardly ever join me for breakfast anyways — given their distasteful liquid.
The Mikaelsons, all in the same pace, nod their heads as well. I could tell a few of them didn't want to show such high regards, but I lingered my gaze against Elijah's stern expression. He appeared to be the one to slow their foolery and mockery down. Such a trait I admired, but wouldn't show.
Politely, I smile, observing their lack of hunger towards my feast. I should've guessed they wouldn't be devouring the eggs and bread, no less the bakery items that were covered in sugar. They were as alike to Inej and Kael as I had originally thought.
Though they do not know that I know who they are, I grab my utensils and speak out towards them. I wondered soon enough if they'd be willing to share their secrets to the supernatural.
"Would you all like something else?" My eyes linger towards the food, then back at each individual, noticing their unsettling features, "I figured the eggs and bread would've been a hit."
I chuckled softly as I stacked a great amount of eggs onto my fork. Very quickly after my words, Elijah replied in a tone of urgency.
"And very well they are, your majesty."
I prompt my brows in a confused manner, but was suddenly surprised as I watched Elijah begin to eat. I solely imagined their reaction to human food wasn't as delicious as human blood. I was wrong.
Because one after the other, like some sort of effect, they all began to eat. Half motioning towards the eggs and bread, while the other manhandle the pastries.
"No need to be so modest, I very well can allow my maidens to make something more appetizing," my eyes fell upon Elijah, weighing heavy as he shifted uncomfortably in his chair. I guess my word choice had caused such panic.
Kol lunged forward, a cheeky smile present as he smirked pompously towards his brother before adverting such a stare back at me.
"Any type of meat you may have?"
There was a mischievous glint shimmering. I felt my breath hitch as I twirl my fingers in the air to bring over my trusted maidens. Vampires or not, they are still my most loyal companions.
Whispering in their ears, I curl a precious smile as I continue to nod as their presence withers away. Inej and Kael stay close to the exit of the double doors, but I wasn't to be completely fooled as they rounded their necks to get a better advantage of eavesdropping.
Dropping my fork in the process of grabbing ahold of my napkin, I wipe my lips before replying towards Kol.
"Deer is my only option, I hope you do not mind."
I hum politely as Kol appears to be devouring the salvia slapping against the tunnels of his mouth. Squinting my gaze, he surely appears to be the wrong doer throughout the siblings.
I do hope it isn't my mistake to feed him such animals. Truthfully so, I'll be praying on my own downfall.
Elijah fastened a hand outward, unsure and uncertain of my actions, taking the precautions as necessary. He didn't seem to be too pushy or needy. In fact, he wanted everything done in my orderly. I winced at the fact that he so willingly places himself at my feet.
"No need for the deer," he glues his gaze at his brother, sharply exhaling, "Kol is more than capable of eating what's set in front of him."
I smirk, but do not show it. I know exactly what he's referring to when thinking of deer. All the blood. All the allure. We don't have cooked meats, not until supper time. So either way, he'd have to delve into the raw flesh of the deer. I knew I'd be sick if I watched such obscurity.
"I don't mind at all, though it is not cooked."
Kol's eyes swiftly met my gaze, almost thinking I was testing him. His eager reaction gave him away. But hadn't I known any better, I would've never noticed such strong afflictions towards the death of animals. He would merely give everything up if it meant he could have one drop of blood.
And that thought alone was horrifying.
"So raw deer is the only option?" Kol furrowed his brows. I couldn't tell whether he was disappointed or satisfied. I twitched in my seat trying to decipher his expression.
I nod my head, swiftly and elegantly as I continue to eat my food. I could practically feel the snaps of their heads motioning towards Kol, scolding and pressuring him into eating the food placed in front of him. But quickly enough, he took my offer.
"Raw deer it is then." He wore a promptly and evil smirk, something that reeked of desperation and devour as he circled his eyes around his family.
Even while it was my choice to offer such food, I began to feel sick, knowing exactly what the deer would look like as it came into view.
Elijah did not want to partake into this game. He couldn't quite read me, which made me very proud. I didn't need him wondering how I knew exactly who they were. Nor was I wanting to tempt them, to such devour and allure, but I quite enjoyed the skittish and squeamish expressions emitting from Inej and Kael.
I could tell by the hatred in their eyes that they despised the Mikaelsons. Which ultimately made them my greatest protection. If I was kind and generous, a grand endeavor to their wants and desires, I'd be saved. Maybe.
"We do not wish to pester you and your maidens to provide food for us outside of what is already served."
Elijah was so content on backtracking and refusing the extra accommodations, but I simply didn't mind. It was everything I needed to go according to plan.
I promptly leaned forward, eyeing all around the Mikalesons, so I didn't just call out Elijah, "As my guests, I want you to feel welcomed and comfortable," by my eyes alone, I knew Kael and Inej could sense my sternness, "and I sha'll present to you anything you may need."
To my right, I noticed Maribel and Rebekah seated next to Elijah. They wore smiles, pretty and poised as they nodded their heads. They thought nothing of my words, thinking only that I was a good host. Complete opposite of them, the remaining four siblings sat. While all composed and relaxed, Kol was fidgety and managing to wiggle a little smirk.
He was hungry and that much could be sensed all throughout the room. Though, as we made eye contact, he knew not to make a sudden move.
All had been silenced anyhow, by my mouth and theirs, as the deer delivers its head towards the center of my table. And I knew I was right from the moment I suggested it. I was to feel sick. Maddened by own choice, I politely and graciously bowed in front of my guests before escaping — if anyone would even call it that.
I quit playing my own game as I left. I could practically feel the stupid and smug grins curling onto Kael and Inej's lips. I felt nauseous and ceased that as an opportunity to flee.
What I couldn't understand, is when someone followed me out. Especially when that person was Elijah. He didn't appear satisfied by my movements.