𝖥𝖱𝖨𝖣𝖠𝖸, 𝖲𝖤𝖯𝖳𝖤𝖬𝖡𝖤𝖱 𝟣
𝐒𝐘𝐈𝐑𝐀 𝐊'𝐋𝐀𝐍𝐈 𝐂𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐄𝐑
𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐑𝐋𝐎𝐓𝐓𝐄, 𝐍𝐎𝐑𝐓𝐇 𝐂𝐀𝐑𝐎𝐋𝐈𝐍𝐀
𝟸:𝟷𝟼 𝙿𝙼
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Syira sat in a comfortable spinning chair across from her therapist named Kaitlyn. She was a middle aged white woman who seemed to actually have a lot of similarities with Syira, which made it easier for the two to bond and talk to each other.
Yes, Syira was a black woman while Kaitlyn was a white woman, very big differences. But when it came to their personalities traits, the things they went through as kids, and even little things like their favorite color or favorite thing to do, they were alike.
It was crazy to Syira because at first, she didn't think she was going to have a good experience with the lady. Because she was white. Like she always said, she never had good experiences with white people. But she didn't judge a book by its cover, she didn't judge her. She came with an open mindset and things were going well.
Syira started therapy after Joel suggested it. He said that he was doing it while in prison because prison was a dark place for him. He claimed that therapy was the only thing he looked forward to while in prison. It was free too.
Syira was nervous to try it but she honestly wanted to try it. She wanted to do whatever to help her from the constant pain she was going through. She knew grief was hard but the way she was grieving wasn't healthy, everyone including herself could tell.
She'd have her days when she would isolate herself from literally everyone. That was fine with everyone, if she wanted space she could get it. But then it got concerning when she would forget to eat, sleep, and sometimes even keep up with her hygiene. She was slowly but surely becoming depressed and nobody wanted that for her.
They didn't even let that go on for a full 2 weeks before they suggested therapy and she started doing it. 2 weeks in and she honestly felt like it was helping. Not only that, she started doing hair to occupy her time when she wasn't working.
"So on a scale to one to ten... how much do you think you've improved with grieving?" Kaitlyn asked Syira who was eating from a bag of Barbecue Lays.
"I'll give it a 6.5 or 7. To be honest, I don't think it'll ever be a 10. Because nobody can ever fully be done grieving, you know? Even if you accept the fact that someone is dead, grief is always gonna be there. There's always gonna be a time when I'm like damn... I wish my brother was here," She said and Kaitlyn nodded with a slight smile, loving how wise she was with her words.
"But I'm honestly doing better. I'm eating, sleeping, doing all the stuff I did before regularly. I don't bottle up my feelings as much anymore. I can talk and think about my brother and I'm okay with crying when I do but I'm doing better at not crying."
"I cry everyday though. I'm not sure if that's healthy or not but every night before I go to sleep, as I'm praying, I just cry. I'm not asking God why he took my brother away anymore. More so just wishing I had one more conversation with him, one more hug, one more chance to say I love you and stuff. Wishing I didn't take that stuff for granted," She spoke while rocking back and forth, looking down at her nails.
"Crying is definitely healthy. It's better to cry every night than to hold it in every night. And I'm really glad you're aware of how you feel and you're able to express and understand your feelings. It's a really good trait of yours and I love that for you," Kaitlyn spoke making her smile.
"I try I try," Syira shrugged. "Random thought but sometimes when I'm having fun or just in the moment, I start thinking about my brother and I feel guilty for having fun for some reason. Like my brother just died and I'm out here tryna go to a party and shit... it don't be feeling right and that's part of the reason why I started isolating myself at one point in time."
"Oh I definitely feel you on that one. I felt like that when my mom passed and to be honest you just have to have a positive mindset. Your brother doesn't want you to be sad and crying over him all the time because it's not going to bring him back. He wants to see you happy, so be happy! Don't feel guilty for that," Kaitlyn told her.
"Yeah you're right.." Syira nodded, taking her words in. "Damn.. you're right."
"Aren't I always?" Kaitlyn flipped her hair cockily making Syira eye her, she then bursted out laughing. "I'm kidding."
"I have one more thing I wanna touch base on but I'm not sure if we have enough time," Kaitlyn looked at her Apple Watch seeing it was 2:20. Their session ended at 2:30. It lasted an whole hour but it went by fast.
"We have enough time. I doubt my boyfriend's gonna be on time anyway. If he interrupts, we can just continue next time," Syira told her, low-key excited for what she had planned to talk about next. She loved answering questions and expressing herself.
"Okay well remember last week you told me that you're taking the stand against your mother in court?" Kaitlyn mentioned making Syira roll her eyes at the thought of her birth giver.
"Yes."
"How do you feel? Do you think that's gonna take a toll on you? Seeing your mom again for the first time after the whole incident..." Kaitlyn questioned.
"Um.." Syira took a deep breath, thinking about it. "To be honest, no."
Sadie was in jail awaiting for her court case to start, which was set in October. She was being charged with reckless driving, driving under the influence, and manslaughter. Syira wanted to testify against her because she felt like her mother purposely crashed the car to kill herself and her kids. When things didn't work out like it was supposed to, she fled.
It sounded crazy but her mom was crazy, there was no telling where her mind was that night. But Syira was willing to prove it, she wanted justice for her brother.
"Why no?" Kaitlyn tilted her head.
Syira shrugged nonchalantly, popping a chip in her mouth. "I don't really care about her. I lost all respect and care for her a long time ago not gon lie. After she killed my brother, she became dead to me."
"So you don't love your mom anymore?"
"Does my mom love me?" She retorted. "My bad, that was a rhetorical question. But no, I don't think I love my mom anymore. It actually kinda hurts saying that cause I always looked up to her and always respected her and wanted to grow a bond with her but I couldn't. She changed so much and I hate that. But there's no rekindling that now. The Bible says not to hold grudges and to forgive but it's gonna take me a long time to forgive that woman," Syira expressed.
"And that's understandable," Kaitlyn nodded. "Very understandable."
"Well—" Kaitlyn started before Syira's phone started vibrating from on the table. She instantly grabbed it and smiled seeing it was Tristan.
My Handsome Man ❤️
You done?
Take yo time if you not
But I'm outside waiting fa you
"I'm guessing that's him," Kaitlyn said making Syira look up, a wide smile on her face. "Y'all are so adorable. I miss when me and my husband were young, now all his stomach is humongous and all he wants to do is cuddle."
"Bye Kaitlyn," Syira laughed.
"Oh! Bye then!" Kaitlyn replied making Syira laugh even harder.
"Noooo. I mean bye like bye as fuck you're funnyy... you know?"
"Um.." Kaitlyn trailed off. "I'll just go with it."
"Okay but now I'm actually saying bye," Syira said as she stood to her feet. She slipped her slides back on and went to the corner of the room to throw her empty chip bag in the trash. "I'll see you next time Kaitlyn."
"See you next time Syira! Good talks today."
Syira turned around as Kaitlyn stood up. She walked over to her and opened her arms for a hug. They embraced each other in one, rocking back and forth for a few seconds before pulling away. Syira waved to her once more before walking out the room.
She set her next appointment up at the front desk and soon made her way out. She looked around trying to spot her car. Tristan had dropped her off with her car but now it was nowhere to be seen.
"Syira!" She heard, making her quickly turn her head to the direction she was hearing her name being called. She squinted her eyes when she saw a figure standing in front of a black SUV.
"Is that my man..?" She mumbled to herself as she made her way down the parking lot. As she got closer, she saw that it was indeed Tristan standing in front of the Black Cadillac Escalade. He had a bouquet of roses in his hand, the roses that Syira would never get tired of.
"Awww, what are these forrr?" Syira smiled as she got closer. He handed her the pink and white mixture of roses before kissing her lips.
"It's yo birthday eve baby. Even though everyday yo birthday," He told her and she smiled even harder. She low-key thought he forgot about her birthday since he barley even said anything. All he told her to do was get her hair and nails done. "I got a surprise for you mama."
"Where?" She asked. "And thank you for the flowers. I'll never get tired of them."
"I can't wait to start building yo garden. Gon have you some homemade flowers every-time," He smirked, pecking her lips again. "But cmon, get in the car."
"Where's the surprise?" She asked again as he grabbed her free hand. She raised an eyebrow seeing a man dressed in an all black suite opening the backdoor for them. Syira got in first, Tristan following after.
"Am I dressed okay?" She asked as the door closed.
"You look great babe," He smirked, grabbing her neck to bring her close. He kissed her lips once again, this time more passionately than the last one. Syira softly moaned before he pulled away, softly biting on her lip then he let go. "You so pretty mamas."
"Thank you handsome," She rubbed his chin. "Can you give me a hint of the surprise?"
"Nope. It's a surprise for a reason Syira," He eyed her, laying back in his seat as the driver got inside of the car.
"Put your seatbelt on," Syira told him as she put hers on. Tristan instantly did as told.
"You ready for yo birthday?" He asked her.
"Yes. I would be even more ready if I knew what we were doing but hey," She shrugged, laying her head on his shoulder.
"You'll know soon bae. But how was yo session?" He asked.
"It was good, like always. I love therapy. I should've tried it long before," She said before yawning.
They talked a bit more until Syira eventually fell asleep due to the ride being so long. Almost an hour later, they finally pulled up near an airplane.
"We are here," The driver announced as Tristan looked out at the window at the beautiful golden jet.
"Syira," He shook her a bit. She slowly opened her eyes and sat up straight, cracking her neck since she was laying on him the whole time. "We here."
Once she was off her, he instantly opened his car door. "I got her," He spoke before the driver could open her side door. The driver nodded, going to the trunk instead to get their baggage. Tristan jogged around the car and opened Syira's door. He grabbed her hand and helped her step out of the SUV.
Once she was out, her eyes immediately went to the huge and loud plane in front of her. It didn't look like a regular plane either so she knew it had to be something special. "Is that a—"
"Private jet," He nodded. "We going to the Bahamas mamasss."
"OH MY GOSHHH," She squealed jumping on him, he immediately caught her and spun her around making her laugh and smile even more. "Oh my God Tristannnn I love you so so muchhhh. I always wanted to go to the Bahamas!"
"Well we going now baby. You ready? We there for 2 weeks."
"Really?" Her eyes lit up. "In a private jet thoughhhh? How much money did you spend?"
"That don't matter. My pockets got no budget when it come to you Syira, no funny shit. On some real ass shit," He told her truthfully.
Syira just stared at him with so much adoration and love. She was truly so happy, words couldn't even explain it. She grabbed both sides of his face with her hands and pecked his lips repeatedly. "I love you I love you I love youuuu!"
❤︎❤︎❤︎
𝖲𝖠𝖳𝖴𝖱𝖣𝖠𝖸, 𝖲𝖤𝖯𝖳𝖤𝖬𝖤𝖱 𝟤
𝟷𝟸:𝟶𝟶 𝙰𝙼
𝘁𝗿𝗶𝘀𝘁𝗮𝗻𝗺𝗼𝗼𝗿𝗲
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𝖫𝗂𝗄𝖾𝖽 𝖻𝗒 𝗶𝘁𝘀𝘁𝗮𝗹𝗶𝘆𝗮𝗵𝗵_ 𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝗈𝗍𝗁𝖾𝗋𝗌
𝘁𝗿𝗶𝘀𝘁𝗮𝗻𝗺𝗼𝗼𝗿𝗲 𝖨𝗈𝗇 𝗎𝗌𝗎𝖺𝗅𝗅𝗒 𝗉𝗈𝗌𝗍 𝗈𝗇 𝗁𝖾𝗋𝖾 𝖻𝗎𝗍 𝗐𝗁𝖾𝗇 𝗂𝗍 𝖼𝗈𝗆𝖾 𝗍𝗈 𝗆𝗒 𝗁𝖾𝖺𝗋𝗍 𝗂𝗆𝖺 𝗌𝗁𝗈𝗐 𝗁𝖾𝗋 𝗈𝖿𝖿 𝖾𝗏𝖾𝗋𝗒𝗍𝗂𝗆𝖾. 𝖧𝖺𝗉𝗉𝗒 𝖡𝗂𝗋𝗍𝗁𝖽𝖺𝗒 𝗍𝗈 𝗆𝗒 𝗅𝖺𝖽𝗒 @𝘀𝘆𝗶𝗿𝗮𝗸𝗹𝗮𝗻𝗶_ , 𝗆𝗈𝗌𝗍 𝗀𝗈𝗋𝗀𝖾𝗈𝗎𝗌 𝗐𝗈𝗆𝖺𝗇 𝖨 𝖽𝗈𝗇𝖾 𝖾𝗏𝖾𝗋 𝗅𝖺𝗂𝖽 𝗆𝗒 𝖾𝗒𝖾𝗌 𝗈𝗇, 𝗇𝗈𝖻𝗈𝖽𝗒 𝗍𝗈𝗉𝗉𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝗒𝗈𝗎 𝖿𝗋 𝗆𝖺𝗆𝖺𝗌 𝗒𝗈𝗎 𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝖼𝗈𝗅𝖽𝖾𝗌𝗍 𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝖽𝗈𝗇'𝗍 𝖾𝗏𝖺 𝗅𝖾𝗍 𝖺 𝗆𝖿 𝗍𝖾𝗅𝗅 𝗒𝗈𝗎 𝖽𝗂𝖿𝖿𝖾𝗋𝖾𝗇𝗍. 𝖶𝗈𝗋𝖽𝗌 𝖼𝖺𝗇'𝗍 𝖾𝗏𝖾𝗇 𝖾𝗑𝗉𝗅𝖺𝗂𝗇 𝗆𝗒 𝗅𝗈𝗏𝖾 𝖿𝗈𝗋 𝗍𝗁𝗂𝗌 𝗀𝗂𝗋𝗅 𝖿𝗈𝗋𝗋𝖾𝖺𝗅. 𝖨𝖿 𝗌𝗁𝖾 𝖺𝗌𝗄𝖾𝖽 𝗆𝖾 𝗍𝗈 𝗃𝗎𝗆𝗉 𝗂𝗇 𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝗈𝖼𝖾𝖺𝗇 𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝖼𝖺𝗍𝖼𝗁 𝗁𝖾𝗋 𝖺 𝗌𝗁𝖺𝗋𝗄, 𝖨 𝗐𝗈𝗎𝗅𝖽 𝖽𝗈 𝗂𝗍 𝗈𝗇𝖻 𝖨 𝗐𝗈𝗎𝗅𝖽. 𝖶𝖾 𝖿𝗂𝗇𝗇𝖺 𝖳-𝖴𝗉 𝗂𝗇 𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝗂𝗌𝗅𝖺𝗇𝖽𝗌 𝖿𝗋 𝗆𝖺𝗆𝖺. 𝖸𝗄𝗐 𝗂𝗍 𝗂𝗌 𝖻𝖺𝖻𝗒𝗀𝗂𝗋𝗅, 𝗂𝗅𝗒, 𝗁𝖺𝗉𝗉𝗒 𝖻𝗂𝗋𝗍𝗁𝖽𝖺𝗒, 𝗆𝗈𝗋𝖾 𝗅𝗂𝖿𝖾 ❤️❤️
𝗶𝘁𝘀𝘁𝗮𝗹𝗶𝘆𝗮𝗵𝗵_ 𝖿𝗎𝖼𝗄𝗄𝗄𝗄𝗄 𝗂 𝗁𝖺𝗍𝖾 𝗒𝖺𝗅𝗅𝗅𝗅 𝗂 𝗌𝗁𝗈𝗎𝗅𝖽𝗏𝖾 𝗌𝗇𝗎𝖼𝗄 𝗂𝗇 𝖽𝖺 𝗍𝗋𝗎𝗇𝗄 𝖿𝗋
𝗶𝘁𝘀𝘁𝗮𝗹𝗶𝘆𝗮𝗵𝗵_ 𝖻𝗎𝗍 𝗁𝖺𝗉𝗉𝗒 𝖻𝖽𝖺𝗒 𝗍𝗈 𝗆𝗒 𝗌𝗂𝗌𝗍𝖺𝖺𝖺𝖺𝖺 😘😘😘😘
𝖵𝗂𝖾𝗐 𝖺𝗅𝗅 𝟤𝟥𝟣 𝖼𝗈𝗆𝗆𝖾𝗇𝗍𝗌
𝗶𝘁𝘀𝘁𝗮𝗹𝗶𝘆𝗮𝗵𝗵_
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𝖫𝗂𝗄𝖾𝖽 𝖻𝗒 𝗿𝗲𝗮𝗹𝗵𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗮𝘀𝘀𝗻𝗶𝗴𝗴𝗮 𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝗈𝗍𝗁𝖾𝗋𝗌
𝗶𝘁𝘀𝘁𝗮𝗹𝗶𝘆𝗮𝗵𝗵_ 𝖧𝖠𝖯𝖯𝖸 𝖡𝖨𝖱𝖳𝖧𝖣𝖠𝖸 𝖳𝖮 𝖬𝖸 𝖡𝖨𝖳𝖢𝖧𝖧𝖧𝖧𝖧 , 𝖬𝖸 𝖱𝖨𝖣𝖤 𝖮𝖱 𝖣𝖨𝖤, 𝖬𝖸 𝖲𝖶𝖤𝖤𝖳𝖥𝖠𝖢𝖤, 𝖬𝖸 𝖬𝖥 𝖡𝖤𝖲𝖳𝖨𝖤 𝖠𝖭𝖣 𝖲𝖨𝖲𝖳𝖤𝖱 𝖠𝖫𝖫 𝖨𝖭 𝖮𝖭𝖤. 𝗂 𝗅𝗈𝗏𝖾 𝗍𝗁𝗂𝗌 𝗀𝗂𝗋𝗅 𝗌𝗆 𝗒𝖺𝗅𝗅 𝗌𝗁𝖾'𝗌 𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝗌𝗐𝖾𝖾𝗍𝖾𝗌𝗍 𝗉𝖾𝗋𝗌𝗈𝗇 𝖾𝗏𝖾𝗋 𝗂 𝗌𝗐𝖾𝖺𝗋 🥹🥹 𝗁𝖺𝗏𝖾𝗇'𝗍 𝖾𝗏𝖾𝗇 𝖻𝖾𝖾𝗇 𝖿𝗋𝗂𝖾𝗇𝖽𝗌 𝖿𝗈𝗋 𝖺 𝖿𝗎𝗅𝗅 𝗒𝖾𝖺𝗋 𝖻𝗎𝗍 𝗂𝗍 𝖿𝖾𝖾𝗅𝗌 𝗅𝗂𝗄𝖾 𝗂'𝗏𝖾 𝗄𝗇𝗈𝗐𝗇 𝗒𝗈𝗎 𝖿𝗈𝗋𝖾𝗏𝖾𝗋𝗋𝗋𝗋 𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝗂 𝗄𝗇𝗈𝗐 𝗒𝗈𝗎 𝗁𝖾𝗋𝖾 𝗍𝗈 𝗌𝗍𝖺𝗒 𝗍𝗈𝗈! 𝗐𝗁𝖾𝗍𝗁𝖾𝗋 𝗒𝗈𝗎 𝗅𝗂𝗄𝖾 𝗂𝗍 𝗈𝗋 𝗇𝗈𝗍 𝖻𝗈𝗈𝗄𝗂𝖾 𝗐𝖾 𝗅𝗈𝖼𝗄𝖾𝖽 𝗍𝖿 𝗂𝗇𝗇𝗇𝗇 😘😘😘😘 𝖭𝖠𝖲𝖳𝖸 𝖭𝖨𝖭𝖤𝖳𝖤𝖤𝖭 𝖯𝖤𝖱𝖨𝖮𝖣 𝖬𝖸 𝖡𝖨𝖳𝖢𝖧 𝖨𝖭 𝖣𝖠 𝖡𝖠𝖧𝖠𝖬𝖠𝖲 𝖶𝖨𝖳𝖧 𝖧𝖤𝖱 𝖬𝖠𝖭 𝖲𝖧𝖠𝖪𝖨𝖭𝖦 𝖧𝖤𝖱 𝖠𝖲𝖲 𝖮𝖭 𝖠 𝖸𝖠𝖢𝖧𝖳 𝖣𝖯𝖶𝖧𝖧𝖧💯💯💯💯💯😂😂😂 @𝘀𝘆𝗶𝗿𝗮𝗸𝗹𝗮𝗻𝗶_
𝗮𝗺𝗯𝗲𝗿𝗹𝘆𝗻𝗻 𝗉𝖾𝗋𝗂𝗈𝖽 😂😂😂😂, 𝗁𝖺𝗉𝗉𝗒 𝖻𝖽𝖺𝗒 𝖿𝗋𝖾𝗇𝗇𝗇 𝗁𝖺𝗏𝖾 𝖿𝗎𝗇!
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hey hey hey
thoughts?
finna drop another chapter later.